How do we know whether we desire to preach for fame or for pleasing Krishna?
Trahscribed by: Geetanjali Nath
Question: How do we know that our desire to preach is due to mode of passion , desire for name and fame , or is it for pleasing Krishna.
Answer: Generally we have to begin doing service and gradually the devotional aspect will come into the service.Just like with respect to chanting, if we say right from the beginning we should chant with pure love, that’s not possible. There will be some desire for peace of mind, some desires for other things, which will be there or at-least the desire will be there, ok, I want to become from all the negative notions. Shrila Rupa Goswami also said that it is like a medicine, treating as medicine, and gradually you will get taste in that. like a sugar cane juice for a jaundice patient. Rupa Goswami said that in rasamrita sindhu, so, same way with any activity that we do in bhakti , we would do it initially and if in the beginning only we worry to much about what is our motive, then we will suffer often paralysis by analysis. We just keep thijnkig and thinking and will not do anything. So if I am going to book distribution, its not that I have to think that :Oh what is my motive for book distribution , every time, we start doing it, and gradually we will find the motive. So with respect to preaching also we should focus on doing the activity of sharing Krishna Consciousness with others, and as we are doing that activity , we also try to purify ourselves. Purify our motive. So if you are associated with other devotes who are also preaching, who are more selflessly motivated than us, then seeing their example also inspires us to also become selflessly motivated more. So the desire for name and fame through preaching will definitely be a contaminant at our stage of bhakti, but we cannot stop preaching because of that contamination. because then we will not be, there are so many people who can be reached, we will not be reaching them. but in our goal is not just to reach people , our goal is also to reach Krishna through our preaching. So for that purpose , gradually we have to purify ourselves. So in general we have to look at our attitude towards different kinds. let me say , they may say that actually I am preaching to benefit others, but is it naturally while preaching I may get some respect, and I may also become famous. So how do I make sure that I don;t get carried away by that ? what is my attitude towards those who are above me ? . i am not just looking at those who are one sense below me, one sense who have come later to Krishna or through me to Krishna, and a: I start thinking that I am superior to my seniors, start thinking that I am more intelligent then them, I am more influential then them. then that is the wrong attitude. So if we have some devotee guides who will correct us when we wrong, then , there guidance will ensure that we will be able to come towards Krishna. we will be protected, and we will go towards Krishna even through what ever happens in our preaching. So in general in any service that we do , there can be ulterior motives. So we don’t stop ther service because of ulterior motives, but we keep a watch on ourselves by trying to observe our consciousness and we also keep a watch , ask some senior devotees to keep a watch, its like if I a plane is supposed to go from here to Kolkatta, Mumbai to Kolkatta to go to Mayapur. and because of the pressure of the winds b,because of the environmental factors, there plane may go off track, Now if the person pilot say that I will wait for the perfect weather before launching the plane, then the plane will never fly. But if the pilot says that ok I want to go and that;s good enough. The plane may just go of way tract, so there are double controls, there is the pilot is oneself watching where the plane is going and there is auto correction, and there are control towers also which tell, Ok pilot now you are going of tract, come back on track. So like that we have to keep observing ourselves, what all are the things that give me happiness, is it that when others praise me that I get happiness, or is it also I feel happy when |I get the opportunity to speak about Krishna. That by speaking about Krishna and getting the opportunity to remember Krishna. So we do auto correction like that ourselves, and like the control tower which warn the plane , we are also in touch with our spiritual guides who tell us. Now it seems that we are getting little carried away, then you should also hear from senior from senior devotees. you should also do some menial services, that will help and protect your ego late on., that way we will be able to stay on track. So if the non devotional motives such as pride becomes too dominant then occasionally some devotees , sometimes some devotees may be told, don’t do this service, so something else. Then we should be ready to give up that service and take up some low profile service if required. but normally be an extreme step , which will be asked only when we do something which is extremely off track. but in general , doing some introspection ourselves and having others to keep a watch on us, that is far more productive way of moving on wards on-wards on our service, and moving on wards on our journey towards Krishna, rather then just worrying about motives and not doing anything because of threat. So even if we are in passion while doing certain services, it is better to keep doing the service , because ultimately , by doing that service only that we move from passion to goodness, it’s not that without doing service , automatically we would become purified. No what will purify us is our service to Krishna. So the cure of our pride is not the rejection of service, or not abandoning service,it is actually doing the service and gradually purifying the intention. I cannot say that its not that by preaching I will become proud. I already have pride and preaching will give me reason to express that pride, reason to express that pride means, yes now I have done something wonderful , now everybody will praise me. that desire , that pride is also is already there in my heart , but if I have not done anything wonderful then I don not have any reason to be proud, reason to express my pride, but if I have done something wonderful then I get the reason to express that pride,. So either way , it is not that by , I may say that its not that after doing that service I become proud, it is after doing service , I get reason to show my pride, or reason to expect praise from others. before that I don’t get it. So its not that by not doing service I will not become proud. what will happen is, that by not doing service that pride will express itself in ugly way as envy for those who are doing the services and are getting praised for that. So its not that we can stay at the material level and stay free from problems, we have to move towards spiritual life, and we do that by doing services, and even if we become proud, we try to redirect ourselves, as if the plane is going off track then we have to auto correct and bring it back on track. I was doing this service bu this was my motive, I do correct myself and bring myself back on the right motive and practice bhakti.