Before we can evaluate our desire we end up indulging in it – what to do?

Answer Podcast

So we have to evaluate our desire but most of the times before we evaluate our desire we have already indulged in it so what to do yes there is there are certain things which are which have become ingrained within us so basically when we talk about habit there is a habit there is an addiction when does a how does a habit become an addiction what do we mean basically see there is stimulus there is a response and there is a gap between the stimulus and the response that means say somebody puts a plate of sweet rice in your table and then I take a bite hey I decided I am not going to eat sweet rice so what happened the stimulus and the response there is practically no thought also in between that means it has become a very strong habit for us so now the whole process the room for will power is primarily the distance between the stimulus and the response so the lesser the distance between the two the lesser is the room for our will power now if something has become an instinctive response for us when we don’t even consider as soon as something comes in front of us immediately we do it so then we can do two things about it first is try to minimize the exposure to the stimulus so for example if somebody has become an alcoholic and then they are trying to recover from their alcoholism the first thing they are told is don’t go to baths don’t go to places where you are going to meet people who are going to sit and drink that is because once the stimulus comes the response it has become like that so then that is the stimulus that is the physical resistance that is not the solution to the problem but that is the necessary first step to the solution if somebody is habituated to surfing on all kinds of undesirable stuff on the net then a step could be just have a net filter which filters out undesirable content so we have to find out how we can create an obstacle between us and the stimulus we can’t create a permanent obstacle we can’t remove the stimulus entirely we live in a world where so many stimuli will come but even a small obstacle between us and the stimulus that can help us in in not succumbing immediately say somebody has a habit of overeating then one thing that we are told is that don’t keep food in close proximity or don’t keep fatty food in close proximity so the urge to eat comes and then if I have to eat I have to go somewhere and get it the simple practical steps we can take to minimize the exposure to the stimulus or at least to make the access to the stimulus a little more difficult for us that’s the first thing, second thing is that whenever the desire starts coming at that time we try to have some positive spiritual stimulus readily accessible for us now among bhakti also there are many stimuli but some stimuli we might be easily able to connect with for example say we like some kirtans we like some special darshan or we like some some quotes from some classes, so keep those things readily accessible so when the mind starts getting agitated on this, so the mind is going in a particular direction that means even the stimulus is not available the sensual stimulus, the material stimulus is not available, the mind will go towards the stimulus, make us go towards the stimulus so at that time, basically the mind agitates us by making us feel that this will give you pleasure and not having this is causing you so much suffering but if at that time we give the mind access to some source of highest pleasure so we just have some nice sweet kirtan dhool going on just start it immediately this is so nice I want pleasure, pleasure is available why do I need to go there so that way by blocking access to worldly stimuli and increasing access to our devotional stimuli, we can actually help ourselves create a greater gap between impulse and response between stimulus and response and that way we can gradually create more and more room for our will power and as we become more and more purified, then we will be able to resist and reject those desires does that answer your question?