Forgiveness Shouldnt Enable Atrocity It Should End Animosity Gita 11.55

Forgiveness shouldn't enable atrocity. It should end animosity.

When someone has hurt us we may wonder should I forgive them? But by forgiving them am I simply setting myself up for future hurts? To know when to forgive we need to understand two distinct needs in that situation. Ending atrocity and ending animosity. Let's look at them.

Ending atrocity. If someone is behaving hurtfully or atrociously then we need to stop them. We can do that by peaceful discussion or we may require firm confrontation.

If we simply forgive them they will just go on hurting us again more and more. When we confront them that confrontation if done effectively will deter them from further atrocity. In Mahabharata the Pandavas were subject to repeated atrocities by the Kauravas.

And when they found that all their overtures for peace were summarily rebuffed then they decided to take up arms to stop the Kauravas. In fact they were called by Krishna who tells them Therefore Arjuna arise and fight. Then after that in the next section the next part we consider is also the need to end animosity.

When we are practicing bhakti at that time or generally going through our normal life animosity is a negative emotion. It can burn us, it can fill us with resentfulness, revengefulness. And it will hurt us more than it hurt others, the person toward whom we bear the animosity.

So we need to end that animosity and forgiveness can be one way of ending it. Otherwise not only that animosity burn us with respect to that particular wrongdoing that the person has done. Actually we will start taking other minor wrongs done by other people who just acted unintentionally, who are not our ill-wishers.

We will start taking their wrongs also too seriously. And thus we will end up burning constantly. That's why the Bhagavad Gita in the same chapter that tells Arjuna to fight also concludes by stating that he should work without animosity toward anyone.

यह समामेति पाण्डव निर्वईरः सर्वभूतेशु Arjuna, bear no animosity toward anyone. How do we bring these two together? Bear no animosity and atrocity. Broadly speaking, if the other person is just a one time, the way they hurt us is just a one time lapse and they bear us no ill will, then we can simply forgive because there is not much likelihood of atrocity happening over there, repeat repetition happening over there.

And we can rid ourselves of animosity and move on. If that person is repeatedly hurting us without remorse or reform, then we can confront them appropriately to deter them. And then we can free ourselves from animosity, forgive their past wrongs and move on.

So to conclude, if we don't do the needful to stop atrocity, others may hurt us repeatedly. But if we don't do the needful to stop animosity within us, we will hurt ourselves repeatedly. It is we who will hurt ourselves.

So by understanding that, by contemplating both these needs to end atrocity and animosity, we can find the best way ahead. Thank you, Hare Krishna.