If we feel like giving up all our messy services and simply going to Vrindavan for devotional absorption how can we deal with that feeling?

The experience of Vrindavan has been very enriching and especially the idea of just turning away from the world, transcending the world and focusing on bhakti, that seems remarkably distraction-free and tension-free.

It seems much more joyful. And I agree it is. But the challenge is twofold.

First is that the joy that we experience in bhakti right now, is it because of our connection with Krishna or is it because of the newness of bhakti? Because many of the things that we are doing, the clothes we are wearing are different, the activities we are doing are different. And that newness itself brings some charm to it. So, now Vrindavan is definitely not just a tourist destination for us.

It’s a spiritual home for us. That’s undoubtedly true. At the same time, the fact remains that it is also materially new for us.

And because it’s materially new and spiritually rich, it’s very attractive. But I have seen many devotees who go to Vrindavan and they get lost, not in Krishna and Vrindavan, but lost in Maya and Vrindavan. Because once you go to Vrindavan, initially, it’s very sublimely intoxicating.

But after some time, that newness goes away. And then, even in Vrindavan, there is politics. Even in Vrindavan, there is, it’s a land of devotion, but it’s also a land of deviation.

There are so many people with different conceptions, different practices, people can get confused. So, that thrill that we feel right now, it’s often because of the material newness rather than about the, rather than because of our spiritual connection or a devotional. Are we experiencing devotional richness? Yes, we are, but it’s a small glimpse.

And when we practice bhakti in this world, slowly we start connecting with Krishna and it’s a real and a rich relationship with Krishna that develops. In any relationship, rather think of bhakti as just a set of activities that makes me happy, which is true. But if you see bhakti more as a relationship with Krishna, then any real and responsible relationship, there are some things which give us pleasure and some things which we do, which gives the other person pleasure also.

Now, ideally speaking, if there is a really satisfying relationship, how it should be there? Things that give me pleasure and things that give you pleasure and things that give both of us pleasure. So, the intersection of the two circles will increase more and more and more. And the separate will become, they will be there, but they will become less and less.

That’s in a normal relationship. Now, in our relationship with Krishna, as we become purified, what happens is, the things that give us happiness, they all are within the ambit of Krishna consciousness. And outside the ambit, we don’t need to go.

But that happens through purification. So, purification involves the gradual transformation of our desires. And transformation of desires can happen in three broad ways.

We eliminate certain desires. So, for example, if somebody wants to take drugs or do unrestricted sexual activity, that we eliminate. So, eliminating some desires, that’s one aspect of it.

Then the other is that we engage some of our desires. So, for example, I always was a thinker, I always wanted to write some things. Now, bhakti has given me so many ideas to write.

I don’t have shortage of ideas. I probably have shortage of the focus and the time to write on those ideas, to develop those ideas and write them. But that’s the second thing.

Engage. Now, third is that we, in one sense, we awaken new desires. So, for example, before coming to bhakti, the idea of dancing in kirtan.

Dancing, we had an idea. But dancing in kirtan says we elevate our desires. You could say, awaken, elevate our desires.

That means what? Elevate means those are the desires we have, but they are for elevated purposes. So, we are looking for bigger things in life. So, eliminate, engage, elevate.

Now, we could say, among these things, the most important is to elevate our desires. That means we have higher desires for Krishna. But then, not all other desires can be eliminated.

Some of them need to be engaged also. So, that means when we are working in the world, like we have some abilities, we use them in Krishna’s service. So, since you have been in the ashram for a couple of years now, two years, isn’t it? You observed other things.

So, see that sadhana and seva, you can find your own balance over there. So, have some time for absorption in Krishna by just turning away from the world and life. That’s why I think finding a balance is helpful.