Angada’s journey – Unity within begets unity without
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Vānara dūta preśaka rāma That Lord Rama, he sent messengers as the rānarās, monkeys, preśaka, he sent them and when those monkeys were going away what happened? Kapivara santata cintita rāma Kapivara, the best of the monkeys, Kapivara santata always cintita, they were remembering Rama There is a reciprocation, they got the instruction from the Lord and fulfilling the instruction, they are not just doing the activity they are also remembering Lord Rama So, let's start with some prayers Oṁ ajñāna-timirandhasya jñānāñjana-śalākāya Cakṣurūṇa-mīlitaṁ yena tasmai śrī-gurave namah Namaoṁ viṣṇu-pādāya kṛṣṇa-praśṭāya bhūtale Śrīmate bhakti-vedānta svāmi iti nāmine Namaste Saraswati Devi, Gauravani Prachārine Nirviśeṣa śūnyavādi pāśyātya-deśa-tārine Vāñchā-kalpataru-bhyaśya-kṛpā-sindhu-bhyeva-ca Patitānāṁ pāvanebhyo vaiṣṇavebhyo namo namah Jai Śrī Kṛṣṇa Caitanya, Prabhu Nityānanda Śrī Advaita Gadādhara, Śrīvāsādi-Gauravakta Vṛnda Hare Kṛṣṇa, Hare Kṛṣṇa, Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa, Hare Hare Hare Rāma, Hare Rāma, Rāma Rāma, Hare Hare Hare Kṛṣṇa So the Ramayana is essentially a book of relationships It is, Rāma is God but unlike Viṣṇu who is in His Divine Majesty Rāma is very much in the center of relationships and the whole Ramayana is dynamic about how relationships move forward I just completed a book based on the Ramayana going to be published, so it is called From Me to Be From Me to Be, essentially the Ramayana talks about that journey All of us if we want to develop and sustain relationships we have to develop that mood of selflessness and some people develop it, some people don't develop it and the various challenges that people go through in trying to develop those relationships that is what the Ramayana talks about So here I will focus on the incident of how when there are difficulties at that time buried suspicions come up and how those suspicions are resolved So Vānara-dūta-preśaka-rāma Rāma, he sent the Vānaras in different directions At that time if we see, the Sundarkand is the place where Hanuman emerges as the central hero Prior to that he is the assistant of the minister of Sugriva and there is a lot of underlying tension in the relationships because Sugriva is in one sense responsible for the death of Vāli and Angada is Vāli's son So Angada is young and impetuous at the time all this happens and he is not yet ready to become the king and Rāma also decides that Sugriva should become the king and not only Rāma decides, Vāli before he dies he himself realizes that I have wronged Sugriva terribly So he not only reconciles with Sugriva but he also tells Sugriva whatever anger you have against me please don't take that out against Tara or Angada they are innocent In fact Tara repeatedly told me to reconcile with you but I did not listen to her because she is very wise you take her counsel and you will be able to rule well and he tells Angada also that don't bear any grudge against Sugriva or against Rāma they are not responsible for my death actually my own misdeeds are responsible So he creates a reconciliation and Sugriva he is now the king so he has the authority but still he doesn't try to stamp his authority on Angada he gives him the space because Angada is still a young man he is recovering from the sudden death of his father and his own future is uncertain when Bali was the ruler then he was the prince there but now when Sugriva has become the king will Sugriva's son become the king or will he become the king so his future at that time is uncertain so when the monkeys are sent in various directions to search for Sita at that time Angada is made the leader of one group actually in this group there are other formidable monkeys also Jambavan is there actually there are three main leaders Hanuman is there, Jambavan is there, Angada is there Angada is made the leader because he is a part of the royal dynasty he was the former king's son Hanuman is powerful but till now Hanuman has not yet overcome the curse which he had got in his childhood because of which he had forgotten his powers so till this point Hanuman's sweet speech Hanuman's capacity to read people all that has come out but Hanuman's prowess has not yet come out so along with that Jambavan has been a formidable king but he is no longer he is past his prime now he is quite old so these three people are the primary leaders in this group and as they go southwards they keep searching Sugriva in order to get people to ensure that they come back he says all of you should come back within one month and then he doesn't mean it at that time but he just says it that those who get delayed they will be severely punished should come back in time basically the point is that you should take this assignment seriously and these Vanaras they go south far and far and far and they are exhausted, they are hungry they have many adventures some seem to be misadventures but fortunately they survive but overall their one month period gets over and still they are not able to find Sita and they are dejected and at that time a split a schism happens between the Vanaras about what to do next so Hanuman says that we were told to search for Sita and we have not found her so our one month period is over let us go back so Angada still has some resentment towards Sugriva because he feels Sugriva killed his father and he says that if we go back now we are already late in returning they were hoping that they will find something they just kept going further and further and one time they got lost in a cave when they were inside the cave they got lost inside the cave coming out of the cave took a long time for them so that's how their one month period got over so Sugriva will take advantage will exploit the fact that we have come late and he will label us as untrustworthy as disobedient as almost infidels and he will have us executed so rather than being executed in front of our loved ones those who have respected us earlier it is better that we don't go back better that we stay here itself so one of the Vanaras some of the Vanaras are fun loving he says no let us go back into the cave from which we had come in that cave they had a lot of comfort he says we will stay in that cave and we will live lifelong happily we will eat and have lots of fruits and lakes and we will have a lot of fun there and Sugriva will never be able to find us so we will live happily there so there is no danger at all Hanuman said do you think Sugriva will forgive such a responsibility now he is a person who has travelled all over the world actually when Vali was chasing Sugriva at that time Sugriva had to flee to various places and he fled far and wide and later on when the Vanaras when Vali became Sugriva became the king and then Sugriva had to send the Vanaras to various directions so at that time Sugriva described to all the Vanaras the geography when you go here you will come across this mountain cross it this way when you go across this you will come to a river like this go this way so then Ram turned to him and said you studied geography very well in your school so Sugriva said it is not because of interest it was because of necessity so then he explained why he had studied so he says that so Hanuman points that out and he says we will not be able to hide like this and we should not we have been given a duty and Sugriva is fair he will he will not punish us for circumstances which are beyond our control and on top of that Sugriva has sent us on behalf of Ram and Ram is fair there is no danger for us Sangada is still angry and and Sangada says that he how can we trust Sugriva he said he conspired to have his own brother killed so that he could get the throne and now that he has got the throne he will see me as a threat to him and therefore he will try to find any pretext to have me executed therefore it will be folly for me to go back now oh Vanaras if you want to go you can go I am not going to go back I cannot I trust such a person who is who is brahatra drohi who has betrayed and killed his own brother now at that time schism becomes even more severe and the Vanaras are confused because Angada is their official official leader at this particular point and then Angada is their official leader but Angada is practically instigating insurrection instigating rebellion against their king and at this time when Hanuman tries to allay the fears but Hanuman's words fall on deaf ears fall on deaf ears and Angada decides that rather than trying to rather than risking going back he decides to fast to death there is in Sanskrit there is in Vedic tradition there is a vrata called the prayavrata prayavrata is I can decrease it prayavrata is actually not suicide although sometimes it is equated with suicide suicide is the artificial destruction of the body because of frustration with life whereas prayavrata is an austerity that is accepted when one feels that now my life is over now there is no more purpose for me to live for so then one gradually stops maintaining the body that means one stops feeding the body one stops even drinking water and lets the body wither away so it is quite a difficult austerity but it is considered if one leaves one's body like that that is considered in some circles to be a sacred way of living so Angada sits down in a yogic posture to do a prayavrata and many of the vanaras also come and sit down with him Hanuman is trying to persuade them but they decide that it is better that we die like this rather than dying back in the kingdom and as they are sitting like this as they are trying to as Hanuman is trying to persuade and he is speaking but Angada is not listening so at that time Hanuman is also caught in a difficult situation because at one level Angada is as I said they are all an army and in the army say there is a commander and under the commander there is some squadron leader and under them there is a soldier so the squadron leader is meant to obey the commander the squadron leader starts casting aspersions against the commander what is the soldier supposed to do at that time so he is still he doesn't start blaming Angada saying that you are you are a traitor or anything like that he tries to reason with him but when he doesn't understand he understands that Angada is still a youth he is hurt and what he is speaking these are not words coming from his heart they are actually words that are coming from his hurt emotions right now it's not that he bears and he will grudge towards Sugriva you know we should not ascribe intention to things that are spoken in tension when somebody speaks something in tension now people do speak and there is a lot of pressure a lot of pressure sometimes some words come out like that when someone speaks something in tension we shouldn't hold that against them and we shouldn't ascribe intention to that so although he is he is criticizing Sugriva but still Hanuman doesn't hold it against him and Hanuman is wondering what to do so now for a devotee when one doesn't know what to do what does one do one definition of intelligence is to know what to do when you don't know what to do to know what to do when you don't know what to do what does it mean actually the one thing that is common for us in all situations is that we are meant to serve we are parts of Krishna and we are meant to serve the whole as a part of the body we are meant to serve the whole body so there are situations when what to do may not be clear Srila Prabhupada writes in one paraphrase the devotee may be perplexed but a devotee is never discouraged discouraged means I don't feel like doing anything perplexed means I don't know what to do there will always be situations in our life when we can get perplexed should I do this or should I do that but a devotee is not discouraged because devotee knows that Krishna exists that the lord is always there I am here I am meant to serve the lord now how specifically I should serve in the situation that may not be clear to me that's why I may be perplexed but devotee doesn't get discouraged what is the point of it just give up don't do anything so Hanuman is also perplexed at that time and what does he do Kapivara Santata Chintita Rama Kapivara the best of the vanaras they are all powerful vanaras the best of the vanaras refers here to Hanuman Santata Chintita Rama so he remembers lord Ram and he prays to Ram and he seeks guidance and sometimes guidance may come in a most unexpected way in a way that may well be not just not what we expect may be the opposite of what we expect sometimes when we pray to god at that time we pray please give me this please give me that or please I have this problem please solve it in this way please make this happen so at such times when we are praying to god basically we are forming a partnership with god but what are the terms of the partnership oh god you are powerful enough to do the things which I can't do so let's form a partnership my intelligence and your power this is the plan and you execute it now god doesn't work like that it is good to have faith in god if you have faith in god's power that is good definitely one level of faith but that is only half trust in god full trust in god means not just faith in god's power god is not just omnipotent he is also omniscient you need to have faith in god's intelligence also and god sometimes answers prayers in ways that are quite different from what we expect sometimes some child may be hungry and child goes and shakes an apple tree sometimes we may shake an apple tree and a mango may fall but if we are expecting only apples we may overlook the mango the mango is actually solution to our need if I am hungry but we shouldn't be we can pray to god for some specific solutions also but at the same time we should be open for other solutions and that openness will ensure that we don't miss out when god answers our prayers but in a way different from what we expected so that's what happens here hanuman is praying how to reconcile how to solve the situation of either wanting to rebel against Sugriva or want to fast to death neither of them are feasible and that time the answer comes in a most unexpected way that is they have a solution to a problem and a bigger problem comes up so what is that bigger problem there is a giant vulture Sampatthi appears over there and Sampatthi comes and looks at all the vanaras oh he says providence has blessed me very much providence arranged me a multiple course feast for me today every vanara will make a feast for him so multiple course feast and he just comes and starts sitting over there and he says I will wait as these vanaras drop down dead because they are fasting then I will eat them one by one now the vanaras are ready to die it's one thing to die and die in a prayavrat it's quite another to think that as soon as I die my body is going to be devoured by a vulture so Angada becomes alarmed Angada says oh I think this is providence punishing me because I have failed in my service to Ram that is why I am being punished and that is why now another vanara says that alas just as Jatayu tried to serve Ram but failed and was killed similarly I too tried to serve Ram but I it seems I will also die as he is feeling this suddenly the giant vulture that is there trembles passes over his body he is coming towards the vanaras and he frees in his tracks and then he recovers and says oh monkey what did you say did you mention my brother Jatayu did you say that he has died I have not seen him for years and years now can it be true that I will never see him again please oh vanara tell me what happened to Jatayu Rangada is surprised he says who are you how is Jatayu your brother Sampathy tells the whole story of how when they were two together Sampathy was an elder brother and they had gone high up to the sun to compete in their youthful zeal they wanted to reach the sun but in trying to reach the sun they had become scorched and although there was competition but still if the one brother is older that brother also has a sense of responsibility for the younger brother sometimes if two brothers start fighting and in the fighting the older brother suddenly the younger brother gets hurt immediately the brother changes the role from a competitor to a protector he says now I need to take care of you so like that they are in the mood of competitors they are rising up towards the sun but when the heat starts becoming too much at that time Sampatti feels a sense of responsibility and he spreads his wings as far as possible and he offers the shade of his wings to Jatayu and Jatayu is protected from the heat but both of them are exhausted both of them are parched by thirst and both of them start falling down but because he has spread his wings Jatayu is protected however Sampatti's wings get burnt and Sampatti falls down on the earth and Jatayu goes elsewhere Jatayu is also exhausted that's why he is just trying to try to recover and he falls away he goes to a different place and Sampatti goes to a different place and after that they have never met so he says that time a great sage came to me so he says since that time I have never seen Jatayu so please tell me what happened and then Angad tells the story of how Jatayu attained martyrdom while fighting Ravana in the service of Rama and then tears start streaming down Jatayu Sampatti's face as he cries at the death of his brother and he requests the Vanaras he goes to the nearby sea and he offers water in the sea offers prayers for his departed brother and then he sits down and he says I have been waiting for so many years and it has all been in vain as he is speaking Angad starts thinking although he was upset although he was he never gave up his desire to serve Rama and now he starts thinking that if Sampatti could go as high as near the sun then he must have traversed the whole earth maybe he will know where Ravana's abode is maybe he can tell us where Sita might be maybe our mission is not yet lost and thinking like this here also although he is just a few minutes ago sometime ago he wanted to commit suicide he wanted to give up his body practically the dharmic suicide you could say but he now has still the desire to serve is there and immediately as soon as the opportunity comes he asks oh Sampatti do you know where Ravana's abode is do you know where Ravana might have taken Sita and at that time Sampatti is so dejected for years and years he has been practically immobilized and now the main purpose of his life hoping to reunite with his brother that is also gone suddenly when he hears this question he perks up and he says that actually when I fell on the earth I was so devastated I was so depressed I was so hopeless at that time a great sage came to me he was passing by and he gave me spiritual wisdom and he told me that I can restore your wings to you I can make you powerful again but there is a purpose in your life even now I can see my sight is still very sharp I can see across the ocean I can see Lanka and I can see that Sita is still there in Lanka O Anuras go and attain success in your mission and as soon as he speaks this he feels his wings appear mystically and he says those who are servants of Ram those who are devoted to serving him they will never attain failure keep moving onwards confidently and the Vanaras who have just been rejected all the dejection goes away all the dissension goes away and they all start getting united they start celebrating just now we will find Sita and they march ahead jubilantly and hereafter never does the whole story goes on later but never again does Angada ever suspect Sugriva nor does Hanuman backbite against Sugriva against Angada so there is often when we want unity there could have been dissension over here between Hanuman and Angada or between Sugriva and Angada but what brought them together is they all had an intention to serve and sometimes while doing a specific service sometimes while doing something some frustrations may come different people may have different ideas how things are to be done at that time we need to know that the desire to serve is more important than the desires to serve the desire to serve is the principle that we are all unitedly trying to serve the lord we are all unitedly serve the we are all unitedly serve the lord we are all unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the we are unitedly serve the we are unitedly serve the we are serve the we are serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the serve the we are unitedly serve the lord we are serve the lord we are serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are serve the lord we are serve the lord we are unitedly serve the unitedly unitedly serve the we are we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the we are serve the we are lord we are unitedly serve the we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are unitedly serve the lord we are serve the VANA RADHOOTA PATHI Project Ram Ram Jaya Raja Ram. Ram Ram Jaya Sita Ram. Ram Ram Jaya Sita Ram.
Thank you. Are there any questions? I think you can write down. So, this is from another of Mataji's and she has sent this message.
But it is not related to this specific section. But she asks, why Darshad gave different portions of Kheer to his wife? Why Sunitra had two sons? Ok. Why Darshad gave different portions of Kheer to his different wives? Actually, Darshad's first wife, his chief queen was Kaushalya.
And later on, he had other queens also. And Kaikeyi was his, she was young, she was beautiful, she was his favorite queen. So when he, Sunitra was in between.
And still they were, till Kaikeyi asked for Ram to be exiled, till that time they had very cordial relationship among them. So Sunitra, her position was that she naturally was serving. She would serve Kaushalya as the elder queen.
And she had the desire that actually her sons, whoever will become the king, her sons should serve them. And what, because Sunitra in one sense was in the middle position where she was not exactly as favored as the eldest queen might be, nor she was as favored as the favorite queen might be. So in one sense, she was somewhat in between.
But because they had a cordial relationship at that time, so how it worked was that he gave one portion to, in the different Puranas, exact division is described in slightly different ways. But the overall commonality is that he gave one section to Kaushalya. And then the way it worked out that Kaushalya gave a part of her portion to Sunitra.
What Kaikeyi got, she also gave a part of her portion to Sunitra. And thus she got two portions. So the idea was that although they were co-wives, and although there could have been competitive competition or envy among them, that was not there.
Both of them, Kaushalya and Kaikeyi, they were aware that they had a privileged position in one way or the other. And recognizing that Sunitra did not have a privileged position, they wanted to sympathize with her. That's why they both gave a portion of their kheer to her.
And that's how she had two sons. But when these two sons she had, the way it worked out that both her sons, there's a mood of mutual serving and caring. So she got two sons because she got two portions of the kheer.
But she felt that let these two sons serve. And thus they had Lakshmana who was always serving Rama and Shatrughna who was always serving Bharata. And that's how they were four sons, but they were all linked together in a bond of intimate service.
There's a question which is slightly not from Rama. It says, when Draupadi can have five husbands, what's wrong if Muslims have five wives? When Draupadi can have five husbands, what's wrong with Muslims having multiple wives? See here the point is that there is in scripture something which is based on time, place, circumstance. So if we see the Vedic tradition is not specifically against polygyny.
There's polyandry or polygyny, whichever way it is. If you see the Pandavas, their family was quite extraordinary. Five Pandavas had one wife, that is Draupadi.
But each of the Pandavas had his own wives. Now Arjuna had several wives actually. There was Subhadra and then there was Ulupi.
So he had other wives also. The important thing is that there is the sense of responsibility and commitment, which is what is important. And when that is not there, when the primary purpose is just the mutual exploitation and enjoyment, and then there is neglect and termination of the relationship for casual purposes, all that is what becomes a serious problem.
So now we don't have to make value judgments about any particular thing based on what was done specifically in the past. Because in the Puranas itself it is described that the Puranas themselves are Desh-kaal-vibhagavit. Actually there are family principles which are to be applied according to time, place, circumstance.
And the time, place, circumstance is an important consideration. So we see even at those times, Ram chose to have only one wife. And that was respected by everyone.
So the thing here is that the mood is primarily of how we can best do our duties, how one can best practice dharma. So now if you look at the Pandavas specifically, each of them there is a past life story which describes how Draupadi got to have five wives, five husbands. There is a whole story behind or history behind each of the relationships that were formed over there.
So the important thing here is that in today's time, place, circumstance where the culture is significantly different, where the social arrangements are substantially different, practicing spirituality in any way is not about turning back the clock. It is about turning on the compass. Turning back the clock means that we can't, nobody can go back and live the way 5000 years ago people used to live or even a Muslim want to live say at the way 100, 500, 1500 years ago when Mohammed was there.
You can't turn back the clock. Time has moved forward and we have to move forward with time. So spirituality is essentially about turning on the compass.
Turning on the compass means, the compass is the direction within us, the intelligence within us. That Krishna says, I will give the intelligence by which how you can come to me. So we have to, according to time, place, circumstance, understand which cultural practices are not relevant, which cultural practices are essential and which cultural practices are optional.
So the principle that is essential is that whenever relationships are formed, they have to be committed relationships. And in today's socio-cultural ethos, the way the world is that polygamy is often not practical and it is not desirable in today's world because the values are very different. So rather than drawing upon what is given in ancient scriptures to justify what is to be done right now, we should focus on what is the best way we can live in today's world.
There are some essential principles. See, whenever we apply scripture, there are specific examples in scripture and from those specific examples, we have to understand the underlying principle. And from that principle, we have to look at how that principle is to be applied today.
So the specific practice at that time, the specific practice now, that may vary. And in quite many situations, it will vary. And if you try to rigidly try to apply the same practice, that sometime in the past, now it doesn't work.
So the important thing is to understand the underlying principle and apply this principle appropriately. Sir, the last one on this one is why… Just a minute. I'll come back.
So how can we turn on the compass in our own daily lives when we have family responsibilities? How can we move closer to the Lord? Actually, there are, in our life, we can look at, we can sometimes separate our life as material and spiritual. This is my material life, this is my spiritual life. But that is sometimes an inadequate separation.
Because for a devotee, we could put it more appropriately, there are directly devotional activities and there are indirectly devotional activities. So for example, when we come to temple, when we have a spiritual program like this, when we worship the deities, this is directly devotional activities. And we should see that when we are not in the temple, are not directly doing devotional activities, still we can carry the mood of devotion, carry the mood of service with us wherever we are going.
स्वकर्मणात्मभ्यर्ज सिद्धिं विन्दति मानवा By your work, worship Him in this way. So if we look at our life, there are devotional activities and there are indirectly devotional activities. Or the rest of the activities we can classify into three.
There are pro-devotional, there are non-devotional, there are anti-devotional. So there are many sinful, unrighteous, immoral activities, they are anti-devotional. Those we should gradually give them up.
But most of our activities which may be pro-devotional, which may be non-devotional, but they are not anti-devotional. We can infuse a mood of devotion. That means when we say, you don't see this as my child, this is actually God's child who has been entrusted in my care.
We don't see this as my family member, these are actually, they are all a part of one family of God and they are all together in that relationship. And by serving, by taking care of them, actually, I am not just doing my duty to them, I am doing my duty towards the Supreme Lord. So to the extent we do the directly devotional activities seriously, to the extent we, when we have an opportunity to directly connect with the Lord, to the extent we do those activities well, to that extent we will be able to get the intelligence about how to do the other activities in devotion.
So it is not that Krishna wants to make the path to him difficult. He wants to see how much we want to be guided. So when the guidance is clear, at that time if we accept the guidance, and when we are supposed to hear Katha, if at that time we are doing other things, we are checking our mobile, when we are doing other things, we are just waiting for things to get over, we are wondering this problem, that problem.
At that time, when we can focus on the Lord, if we don't focus on the Lord, then later on, we are basically showing I am not interested. Then Krishna says, as all people surrender to me, I reward accordingly. So he will also, if he says you are not interested, I will not interfere.
He will not give us guidance. But when the guidance is clear, at that time we accept the guidance, we try to connect ourselves with Krishna intensely. Then at other times, Krishna will guide us from within.
Okay, this is what I should be doing, this is what I should not be doing. Basically, we all have a Viveka Buddhi within us. Viveka Buddhi is conscience.
And that Viveka Buddhi, if you are exposed too much to materialistic things, it becomes dead-end. Just like a knife may get rusted. Like that, when we are just continuously exposed to materialistic things, those materialistic values dead-end our Viveka, our conscience, our Viveka Buddhi.
But when we expose ourselves to Krishna regularly, then our Viveka Buddhi becomes clear. And then we understand, this is what I should do, this is what I should not do. So by doing directly devotional activities, by understanding the philosophy thereof, we can get the intelligence, this is what I should be doing, this is what I should not be doing.
And if we are making major decisions in our life, at that time, we can also take, we can consult some senior devotees, those who have balanced their material and spiritual lives well, we can take their guidance about how to go ahead. And broadly speaking, as devotees, if we have some time regularly for our spiritual activities, then gradually the spirituality will infuse our consciousness. And that's how we can, it's like first we think, there is a temple, this is my home.
And God exists in the temple. But then gradually we start, oh, I should make my home also into a temple. I can have an altar in my home, and I can worship the altar, and not that the altar is in a corner.
I say that this is actually, this home belongs to God. And I am a servant over here. I say the first thing is that there is a temple, at least I should go to the temple.
If I don't go to the temple, then there is no connection. But then I make my home into a temple. And then further as we move onwards, we make our heart into a temple.
God is not just present in the temple, in the altar. Actually, I try to invoke his presence in our heart. This is a progression.
As we keep doing the external activities, more and more devotion in Krishna's internal presence becomes more and more manifest within us. Does that answer your question? Last question. There is one question.
Actually, I had another question. Okay, you ask yours then. So there is, we have an inherent, anyone we meet, anyone we see, even family members, good or bad.
Is there some practical way of not trying to do that? Not trying to at least show it? If we have an inherent tendency to judge others, how can we avoid that or at least avoid expressing that? Yeah. See, there is, the judgmental mentality comes because we often put ourselves in a superior position. One thing is discerning.
Discerning means, okay, I understand this. Somebody is in an upset mood, at that time we try to give them some further, we may speak something, that means further agitate those people. So there is discerning, what is favorable, what is unfavorable.
That can and that should be done. But that is done not in a judgmental mood, but in a more of a humble mood. It's like say, somebody is sick.
At that time, if I go and tell some unpleasant news to them, it's going to worsen their condition. Sometimes if somebody is sick, we don't tell them this news, let them recover, then we can talk about these things. So that is simply sensitivity.
So we cannot just go around the world, close to how people are disposed, what they are thinking, how they are living. We cannot go through life like that. We can and we should be able to read people in terms of what their natures are, what their moods are.
But rather than labeling people according to their natures and moods, we can, especially if we study the Bhagavad Gita, we understand that everyone is at their core a pure soul. Now the soul is essentially part of God, the soul is essentially pure. But there are different kinds of conditioning.
So the conditioning that are there, they are basically like a disease. So we don't label people according to the disease that they have. As the disease is there, if it is there, we have to be aware of that.
But just because the disease is there doesn't mean that we have to equate that person with that disease. So if the disease is there, we may have to appropriately deal with it. Somebody has got an infectious disease.
At that time, if we are going there, we may have to put a mask or something or we have to keep a distance or whatever. That's just a practical measure. But we are not judging the person at that time.
So similarly, if somebody is known to be a little irritable, then rather than labeling that person as irritable, we will focus, with this I have to deal with a little more sensitivity. So it's not that they as a soul are pure, but they are having some conditionings. And sometimes people say that, my wavelength doesn't match with them.
They think in a different way, I think in a different way. Yes, it's possible wavelengths may not match at times. But then if we have to do work with someone, if we have a relationship with someone, then humility means to change our wavelength so that it matches.
So we cannot change our wavelength permanently or completely, but at least to some extent we can adjust. So being sensitive does help in small, small things can make a big difference in relationships. So basically recognizing that we don't equate the behavior with the person.
We don't think that this is the characteristic of their bodily conditioning and they are separate from that. Our focus should be on trying to bring out their positive side, bring out their pure side. When we label them for what they are presently are, then we perpetuate their behavior like that.
If you say that you are always irritable, and you tell them like that. And what happens is, then they become irritable about being labeled as irritable. And that just becomes worse.
So even if they are labels, see it's not possible for us to go around in the world with closed eyes. So certainly when we observe some things, we will think about some things. But if we recognize, if we do that inner exercise, Ramayana says, Hanuman when he first saw Ravana in the royal assembly, his first thought was, he is so powerful.
He is such a commanding leader. If only he had been on the side of the gods instead of against the gods. He could have done so much work, glorious service.
So actually Ravana was the enemy for Hanuman. But even in Ravana, Hanuman saw the potential for good. Of course Ravana had no intention of developing that potential.
But still the fact that Hanuman saw the potential even in Ravana, that is, everybody has faults. We all have faults. And especially in Kali Yuga, all of us have a lot of faults.
So in Kali Yuga, finding faults in others is as clever as finding water in an ocean. It is there everywhere. Kaler dosho nidhe rajan.
Kali Yuga is an ocean of faults. But if when we are lost in the ocean, we find land, that is of some use. Water is everywhere.
Similarly, everybody has faults. But if we see some good in people, that is like finding the land. And then we can actually help those people to develop by that.
So we can't avoid seeing the bad. But by remembering that the bad is different from the core person and focusing on the good within that person, we can try to bring more stability and maturity in that relationship. Yes, Natalya.
If a person is doing good deeds and has no malice in his heart, does that mean… Okay. Yeah. If a person has no malice in the heart and is doing good, does that mean the heart in a temple or something additional needs to be done? See, there are three different things.
There is paapa, there is punya and there is bhakti. So paapa and punya is what we talk about. The wrong actions and right actions.
But bhakti is not just right actions. Because often when we think about what is wrong and right, we think of it all in terms of the body. So, for example, if somebody is hungry, we offer them some food.
That is a good action. If somebody is hungry, we should offer help if we can. So that is good.
But at the same time, the body and the soul are different. And we at our core are souls. So doing good activities at the level of the body, it helps the body, but it automatically does not help the soul.
So the soul needs to be awakened by a distinct set of activities. And when we are doing good activities, at that time is our heart a temple? Our heart has more potential to become a temple than if we are doing bad activities. But just the good activities themselves don't make it into a temple because temple means there is a presence of the Lord in our heart.
And that presence has to be invoked. So when we do the activities of bhakti, when we chant the holy names, when we associate with devotees, when we hear the Katha of the Lord, that is the time when the Lord's presence becomes manifest. So certainly living a good life is much, much better than living a bad life.
At the same time, the good and the bad, they can both well be there with the misconception that I am the body. One problem is when we are doing good activities, is that at the material level, even the good is not going to stay good for very long. That means I may want to help someone else, but they are going to grow old, they are going to get diseased, they are going to die.
We are also going to grow old, get diseased and die. So materially, whatever we do for them, that is not going to have lasting benefit. That does not mean that we should not do that good.
It means that we should also look for something that is good at a lasting level. So the body is temporary, the soul is eternal. Vishal Prabhupada would give the example, that suppose there is a very wealthy billionaire, and his son has left home, and his son is lost on the streets, and then that billionaire's friend comes and sees along.
Oh, this is a billionaire, he's lost, he's left his father's home and he's hungry, he's sick, he's homeless, he's on the streets. So then he says, please take this food. He says, please take this food, that's good.
But the best thing for that son is, not just to be provided food, not just to be provided clothing, not just to be provided medicines, it is to be taken back to his father's home. The son goes back to the father's home, then all the food, clothing, medicine, everything will be provided automatically. The father is resourceful enough to provide that.
The problem is, yes, that presently he doesn't have those things, and those things have to be provided. But more importantly, he's in that situation of not having those things because he's away from his father. So like that, we are all souls.
As souls, we are all parts of God, and the Lord is Lakshmipati. So we are all his children. And in this world, when we are there, we are away from the Lord.
And we may have various problems, which are serious problems. We have problems, others have problems. And as much as possible, we can try to help others by doing good.
But if somebody does the good for that lost child of giving him food and goes away, and somebody else does the good of clarifying whatever misconceptions, why are you staying away from your father? Your father is so good, go back with him, you'll be much, much happier. And whatever misconceptions are keeping that son away from the father, we remove those misconceptions, and the son becomes ready to go back to the father. Then that is also a much more valuable service.
So like that, if we think of bhakti as simply a show, you just go to a temple, you just do some bhajan, do some kirtan, we think of it just as some pious cultural activity. Then we may think, oh, feeding the poor is much better. We may think, actually, doing something practical in this world is much better.
But if we understand that this is not just a pious cultural activity, it is a spiritually awakening activity. It is an activity which will awaken our dormant love for the Supreme Lord. And that's how the lost child will become reunited with the father.
Then we see that there is bad, there is good, there is papa, there is punya, and there is bhakti. So to the extent we do bhakti, to that extent, the Lord's presence becomes manifest in our heart. And when the Lord's presence manifests in our heart, we also do good at that time.
But we do good with a spiritual understanding. And that good goes beyond the material good and bad. Because that is not just… So it's one kind of our friend may say that, I'll just give you some food, that lost child.
Another says that, I'll give you food, and I will take you back to your father also. So that is the complete good that we can do for others. Does that answer your question? Yes, Mataji.
If someone has hurt you… If someone has hurt us intentionally or unintentionally, how can we forgive them? There are three different aspects which should not be confused. There is forgiveness as an emotion. And there is forgiveness as an action.
And there is forgiveness as understanding and forgiving the intention of the person. Forgiveness as an emotion, I'll explain what I mean by this. Forgiveness as an emotion means that as long as we hold grudge against people, it is we who hurt ourselves more than them.
Now, holding a grudge against others is like carrying a burning piece of coal with us, hoping to hurl it at someone. And whenever we may get to hurl it, before that we are carrying it for so long. So forgiveness burns us much more than it hurts others.
So not forgiveness, but revengefulness that burns us much more than others. So forgiveness as an emotion is something which is good for us. So we think, okay, whatever has happened, at some level nobody can do anything without the sanction of God.
So even if this person has hurt me, ultimately it must be some bad karma that I had done in the past because of which this has happened to me. So forgiveness as an emotion is good for our own emotional health. And by looking at that whatever has happened is because of my past karma, we can forgive.
That as an emotion, it is actually enlightened selfishness. It is for our own good that we forgive. But that is just the first way of forgiveness.
Forgiveness as an action is something which is different. That means if somebody has done something wrong, what is going to be the effect? And I say, okay, I am not going to do anything. I just forgive and forget everything.
But if that is going to make those people feel that they can again and again get away with similar wrong things, then by forgiving, the principle of forgiveness has to be counterbalanced with the principle of justice. And even if it was intentional at that time, if that was accidental, in the sense that it was not malevolent, they did not understand what they were doing or whatever, then at that time forgiveness as an action is also fine because that was accidental. It was not malicious.
So they are not going to do it again and they are not going to use the forgiveness as a license for doing it again and again. See, the Pandavas we see repeatedly, they forgive when the Kauravas poisoned Bhima, they tried to burn them alive. They were ready to forgive at that time.
But when they tried to dishonor Draupadi, at that time the Pandavas were like, this is just going too far. And Krishna himself told, now you have to take exertive action. So forgiveness is an important virtue and quite often we become vengeful about small, small things.
So in today's culture, forgiveness is often much more needed because otherwise we just hold on to grudges too much. But forgiveness is not a singular virtue at the expense of everything else. At other times, there is a principle of justice also which is important.
So in a relationship, we can forgive others, but we can't always trust others. This is the third thing I am talking about, intention. Now forgiveness is for the past.
Trust is for the future. And the two are different. For what people have done in the past, we may forgive them.
But that does not mean that we can trust them. Forgiveness can be given, but trust has to be earned. They have to show through their actions that they have learned their lesson, that they are not going to do this again.
So if we equate forgiveness and trust, then we will not be able to forgive also. Forgiving someone doesn't mean trusting that person. Forgiving someone simply means that we don't hold a grudge against that person.
But trusting means we allow them to come close, we give that which is valuable and important to them to take care of or to administer. So a person who has done wrong, immediately trusting them again may well be irresponsible on our part. So if a child is there and the child has irresponsibly lost a lot of money.
If the mother again, I forgive you and again enters a lot of money. That's not forgiveness. That's not a sensible thing to do.
Child has to show that he has learned the lesson, is careful about money. This is a simple example I am giving. But the point is that trust is something which the other person has to earn.
So for our own emotional health, we can forgive. And then we are not holding a grudge against them. But practically, what we need to do so that that particular behavior is not repeated.
That will vary according to the disposition of the person, according to the way that person is either changing or not changing. And in some cases, if that person changes properly, truly regrets and repents, then that forgiveness will transform into trust. But otherwise, if that person has hurt us and is not ready to even acknowledge that I made some mistake, what to speak of, do something to correct it, then we may have to create some safe distance between us and them so that we are not hurt again.
So actually, this is a big subject. I have a full seminar on Is Forgiveness Practical? And on my website, TheSpiritualScientist.com, there is also a full article on this topic. But we just broadly understand this principle.
Forgiveness is good for our own emotional health. Forgiving is not the same as trusting. And depending on the way they reciprocate, what our forgiveness means in practical terms, whether we allow them back into our trusted circle or we keep a distance between them, that we will have to see based on timely circumstances.
Thank you very much.