​As sadhakas, what emotions can we experience in relationship with Krishna?

Answer Podcast

Responsibility for our own decisions. So, at the sadhaka stage, what are the emotions that we can experience in relationship with Krishna? Is it when Krishna is pleased, we feel satisfied? But apart from that, also there are other emotions. Yes, it is not that non-devotees don’t have their own desires.
Now, a devotee can also have a desire to serve Krishna. Like Krishna Prabhupada said that, my spiritual master told me to preach in the west. Now, that I have done.
Now, I want to preach in India. Now, he focused a large part of his later life on India. Now, that is not, it’s not that it is his own desire, means it is a non-devotional desire.
It’s a devotional desire only, pure desire. But it’s his own desire. So, similarly, now, our desires may not be that pure.
But even we can have some desire to please Krishna, to serve Krishna in a particular way. And even if there is some amount of maybe selfishness or whatever there in it, but still it’s a desire to serve Krishna. And that is laudable.
So, in the Bhakti Rasamit Sindhu, there is the concept of uddhipan. Uddhipan, uddhipan. Uddhipan is in English spiritual stimuli, spiritual stimulus.
So, all of us, we will have our own uddhipan. So, for example, for me, when I go and take darshan, unless I recite some verse, I just don’t experience any connection with Krishna. So, I told one class, you know, so when we recite verses, you know, we can recite the verse and we can think about the qualities of Krishna that are described in the verse and then we can meditate on how that same Krishna is over here.
And then we can connect with Krishna. And then after that, one devotee, after a couple of days, he came and told me, he said, you know, since you told me that, I’m trying that. And when I go in front of Krishna and I try to recite a verse, just memorizing that verse causes so much tension that whatever bhakti I have goes away in that.
So, I realized that verses are uddhipan for me, but they are not uddhipan for that devotee. So, we have to find out what will act as a spiritual stimuli for us. So, for somebody else, it might just go in front of the deities and they sing some kirtan, just some simple Hare Krishna and that’s what connects them with Krishna.
For somebody else, it might just be they behold the beautiful dress of Krishna and that’s what they focus on. So, for us, we will have, for all of us, we will have our uddhipans. And as we move forward in our bhakti, we find out, this is what really connects with Krishna.
Maybe we recite some Vaishnava song or not just some Vaishnava song, sometimes even one line of a Vaishnava song can resonate so much with us or one line of one verse can resonate with us. So, whatever are our uddhipan, they are for us the channels that connect us emotionally with Krishna. So, now all of us, we have that experience of, we could say, sensual stimuli.
Say, we all have certain sensual stimuli that agitate us much more than others. Now, we may have weakness for a particular food or a particular activity, whatever it is. Now, others may not have that.
So, if that is a sensual stimuli which agitates me emotionally, then I have to be cautious in avoiding that stimuli or whatever I can do to minimize my exposure to that. So, just as we customize our practice of bhakti to resist the sensual stimuli to which we are particularly vulnerable, similarly, we need to customize our practice of bhakti so that we can maximize our exposure to the spiritual stimuli that actually connect us with Krishna. So, here we minimize the connection.
In sensual stimuli, we minimize the connection. In spiritual stimuli, we maximize the connection. So, now we see it as Krishna giving His mercy to us through that stimuli.
So, why is it that this particular verse, it just fills me with so much realization, so much emotion, it illuminates me with so much wisdom, so much this line or this particular tune, whatever it is. We see it’s Krishna’s mercy manifesting. So, when we do some service for Krishna, that time Krishna is pleased, we feel emotions.
That’s definitely true. But there are also certain stimuli which connect us emotionally with Krishna. And if we can note that and have those stimuli available for us on a ready basis, then we can fight off our mind much more effectively.
It becomes a weapon for fighting off the mind. So, then whatever we experience emotions in relationship with Krishna, we see that as Krishna mercifully manifesting Himself through that for us. So, we do have some things.
Now, is it that Krishna is pleased with us? Well, quite often, you know, we have not done anything to please Krishna. Yes, we hear some words or we say some darshan, we hear some Hare Krishna Mahamantra tune, and we just feel something. So, we feel some emotional contact with Krishna.
So, it is more like Krishna is, yes, we can say Krishna is pleased with us, in the sense that Krishna is pleased to give us His mercy. Even if I have not done anything, Krishna is giving His mercy through that particular thing for me. And we accept that and we cherish that.
Does that address your question? Generally speaking, it has to do with pleasing Krishna rather than pleasing Himself.