Ask not how could he have done that – ask what is to be done next Gita 03.39

Is covered over once our knowledge is covered over then is the eternal enemy of ours in the form of selfish desire and haunt lust the shpurenana nature it’s like an insatiable fire once the fire starts burning the more fuel is put in it the more it burns like that the more we indulge the more we are pushed towards indulgent that is even even more indulgence more indulgence in frequency more indulgence in in in perversity more indulgent in quantity whatever it is so now sometimes if somebody has been indulging like this privately and in front in in public they are putting on a good face and nobody knows what they are doing and suddenly at one particular point somebody comes to know about it now their actions they can no longer be concealed and they come in the public eye and then people the first question they ask is no how could he have done that so how could she have done that whatever it is so actually the fact is that it’s once somebody gets caught in the in the spell of desire after they get caught in the net of desire and the noose of desire then how far they may be pulled down there is no limit to that a person may be dragged down more and more and more till that person just goes crazy and does things which they couldn’t even have contemplated earlier now they start doing them habitually so instead of oh if we just live in this world enough and we observe enough people around us we will understand that you know asking how could he have done that that is just not a question worth asking because everybody has their inner struggles and irrespective of whatever face they are putting up in public you know how much they are winning in their inner struggle or how much they are being beaten up in their inner struggle we don’t know at all because of that we may think that they are they are doing well but internally they may be embattled they may be they may be enslaved they may be they may have just deadened their intelligence deadened their conscience because of repeated indulgence and then the extent to which they fall would shock ordinary people but they have already fallen to that extent that’s why we need to be extremely careful that first of all we protect ourselves and don’t take casual indulgences casually that actually it’s good to have some kind of serious self-imposed punishment for even casual indulgences so that at least we don’t get distorted because we don’t know how a small thing can take us down in a terribly bad way down the track so but if we see somebody else has fallen has done something which is shocking even reprehensible for us but still rather than asking how could you do that yes they’ve done it now the best question to ask is what can be done next now what can be done next doesn’t mean that we just whitewash what they have done and act as if nothing has happened and go on with life but it means that we recognize that life is life always needs to be lived forward not backward that means if somebody has done something they’ve already done it and yes it’s when somebody who we have trusted ends up doing something terrible it just shakes our faith it can shatter our faith but then life has to be even if our faith is shattered you know life is still going to move on and we have to move on so we need to know that ultimately our faith in any particular person is is connected with is centered on our faith in Krishna and when we are putting a faith in a particular person ultimately we are putting faith in Krishna so yes yes we manifested this particular person was the person through whom in whom we are putting faith but in this world there is a particular system of relationships whether they be material spiritual and all of them require faith so we have to move on in this world and you know a particular faith in particular thing may not work out but the principle of faith we need it for our work for working or doing anything in life you have to put faith in this person or that person or whoever and thereby we have to move on so for us as spiritual beings let us think about what can be done next so is that relationship restorable is that is the person who has done something terrible are they in a repentant mood do they want to change do they recognize the gravity of what they have done and are they ready to change and based on that if they are then are we the right person to help them change or we ourselves are so wounded that we can’t help them but we just keep a distance and let somebody else help them or they are not repentant at all they are they are just trying to rationalize it be self-righteous then just end the whole thing and move on and form a relationship with someone else and just move on with life we may decide it’s for each one of us to decide how we are going to move ahead in life and for this decision there are no there are no formulas there are absolutely no formulas that this is the right thing to do and that is the wrong thing to do we simply focus on on praying to Krishna and recognizing that it is that the illusory energy is very powerful and we may feel that the kind of action this person has done i mean i’ll never do it but life doesn’t come with any guarantees that tomorrow we ourselves might end up doing something which which others would think that no we would never do but we do it therefore it’s best to always Krishna this person this Krishna i’m in this situation i’m overwhelmed i’m perplexed but i’m your servant please guide me how i can serve you please guide me so that i can keep going towards you and guide me so that i can that you can guide me about how i should move forward in this situation and thank you for protecting me oh lord from this dangerous world of temptation where anybody can be overcome and we with this prayerful faithful attitude with the attitude that is determined to serve no matter what happens we can take steps forward and recognizing the fallibility of human beings in this world and focusing on the infallibility of Krishna’s shelter we move on in life thank you to some extent