Balancing intensity and sensitivity in bhakti – Learning from HH Radhanath Maharaj’s example

[Address to god-family at Houston, USA]

Disclaimer: This transcript was generated using AI and may contain occasional errors or inaccuracies.

Hare Krishna. So thank you for coming here today evening and I'll speak today on the topic of balancing intensity and sensitivity in bhakti. I'll speak it, I'll give examples from Maharaj's life also and some of my interaction with Maharaj and also some practical application for us.

Intensity means that we are focused on what we are doing here. So you are completely lost in what we are doing sometimes, that is intensity. Sensitivity means we are aware of what others are doing or what is the effect of what we are doing on others.

How what we are going to do is going to affect others. So an example of how intensity can lead to lack of insensitivity. Say somebody is dancing in kirtans and they get lost in their ecstasy and their hand is spread out and they slap somebody, they are moving round and round in their hands, they slap somebody, hit somebody.

They say I am intensely in bliss but your bliss is putting somebody else in agony. So there is intensity is good in bhakti but bhakti is not just about how we ourselves serve Krishna. Bhakti is also about how we serve Krishna together with others.

So there is sensitivity about others also that is important. So once I was in Vrindavan and I was doing japa, it was the first trip to Vrindavan. So I was thinking I should call wholeheartedly to Krishna and I was doing japa but I was literally screaming at that level, chanting and then one senior called me, came and told me, you can chant like this when you are all alone in a room with all the doors closed.

He is also very sensitive, he didn't tell you don't chant like this, he said you can chant like this and that thing. So I may be having my desire to take shelter of Krishna but then we are a part of a community where we have to be concerned about how others are also being affected by our actions. So when I first read the Journey Home, actually Maharaj had given this book to me before it was published.

So I just asked him to go through it and because he knew that I was a writer so Maharaj very humbly solicited feedback from many devotees before the book came out. So when I read the book, the first thing that struck me, I always knew that Maharaj had such a great search for the truth and out of his great search for the truth, he had left home and gone in search for God. So he has a tremendous intensity in his own search for God but coupled with that, what struck me is that there was enormous sensitivity to other's feelings.

It was right from say that most of us know the story when there was this this sadhu in North India somewhere, he made some khichdi for Maharaj which was very very spicy. Maharaj could barely eat a little but he somehow ate it and then this sadhu came and served more and there are so many pictures with quotes everywhere. So there is one quote I remember that I think that is in that context.

Maharaj says sometimes it is worth shedding our tears for the pleasure of others. So the second time when that food was served, Maharaj just because it was so spicy and especially for people who come from the west, some Indian food can be really spicy and in one sense this was a sadhu Maharaj had met for the first time, he is unlikely to ever meet again but still he is so considerate about his feelings. So there is sensitivity, there is intensity in terms of one's own practice but there is sensitivity in terms of the way one deals with others.

So I know one of our godbrothers, he is a strict devotee. So he was invited to an interfaith meeting and in that interfaith meeting they had arranged for vegetarian food for him because they knew he was the Hare Krishna but then he came to know that actually that vegetarian food was cooked in the same place where non-vegetarian food is also cooked. So he wondered what to do.

That is a big event and the hosts had gone out of their way to arrange for vegetarian food. He was going to offer it in the mind and take it and then he thought okay what would Maharaj do at such a time and then he did something which later on Maharaj was very pleased with. He said he took that food on that day, gave it to Krishna and because as a serious devotee you don't take non-vegetarian food.

He said as an atonement for that he fasted the next day. So our standards are for our purification. They are not for exhibition to others.

Especially our standards are not meant to embarrass others. I am so pure and you are so like this. It's good to follow standards but the purpose of standards is we go close to Krishna and we inspire others to go closer to Krishna.

So the same mood here it was one thing about taking khichdi and then same legacy we see here. We have to do some things which may be more which may be from one perspective a lowering of the standard but from another perspective it is actually an extending of the compassion. So it is said that whenever some whenever any religious organization there are young converts they are very strict.

Now this is the rule and I'll follow the rule especially if they become converted. This is young practitioners know the regulations. Experienced practitioners know the exceptions.

Now we shouldn't make everything into exception for ourselves. There is always a danger for that but the point is that intensity is important. My own purity, my own standards is important but sensitivity is also equally important.

And when we have both then we can actually not only move towards Krishna ourselves but we can encourage others to move towards Krishna. Otherwise sometimes we move towards Krishna and we act in our ways while others feel like moving away from Krishna. Our going towards Krishna should not alienate others from going towards Krishna.

So the closest association of Maharaj I had was when the second book Journey Within came out at that time. Initially that book was titled as the Yoga of Love. Then many different devotees they gave inputs and then finally like every author is you know for the author to have a powerful message there should be consistency in the image.

So the Journey Home and the Journey Within. There's a consistent theme of the journey and journey is also theme of Maharaj's life. I mean he's journeyed adventurously from all over the world.

So Journey Within was a very appropriate name. So at that time the name of the book was the Yoga of Love and then I went through the whole book. Maharaj first sent it to me by mail.

I went through the whole book and then I met Maharaj. Maharaj said no I had given because I am a writer so I had given many grammatical and other suggestions. Maharaj said your suggestions are very good but now you have to incorporate them all.

So I said I have incorporated them. You go through all of them and see if things have been done properly or not. So I just gone.

I was in Nasik, Pune at that time. I had gone into Nasik, went to Chowpatty. It was just for one evening program and Maharaj was giving that program.

So I just offered my services to Maharaj. Maharaj called me and he said that so you can do this and I stayed for almost a week at that time in Chowpatty itself and then he started working. So as the book went on, Maharaj spent a lot of time almost writing every sentence, revising every sentence.

So then at some point then Maharaj told me that when you are doing the service of editing, don't think that you are the disciple and I am the spiritual master. Think that you are doing a service of it and whatever you need for the service you do that. So otherwise if I had to say this is the spelling is not correct or this word, this example can be put or this can be put.

You cannot do that. I had the attitude of the spiritual master is perfect. Yes the spiritual master is perfect but then we have to serve the spiritual master perfectly to the according to whatever capacity, whatever it takes.

So finally the book got completed. I did all the editing and then around nine o'clock I was with Maharaj in the room. Maharaj said Jitendra, now you have done the book very well.

So I think just one thing you can do. Just proofread the book once and tomorrow morning we will send the book for printing. So it was nine o'clock at night and tomorrow morning means there's almost more than 300 pages in the book.

So then I stayed awake the whole night reading, reading, reading the full book. I died when I was working on the book. I just fell asleep and crashed on the computer and it cracked the computer apart.

Then I got another computer from some other devotee and completed it. And then next morning Maharaj was going through the whole book. I was telling okay Maharaj this spelling needs to be corrected.

This one needs to be corrected. So the spelling of Bhakti Siddhanta. So there Bhakti Siddhanta it was S-I-D-D.

Siddhanta that there was one letter that was wrong and the spelling was wrong. Maharaj said the spelling needs to be corrected. Maharaj said you passed the test.

Maharaj was taken aback. What do you mean? Maharaj said I had kept the spelling wrong intentionally to see whether you will catch it or not. So I didn't know what to respond to that.

I just looked at Maharaj. Maharaj just laughed and said I was joking. So afterwards Gaurang Prabhu told me that and I told you how I stayed awake the whole night to do that book.

Maharaj said that this is one day I have been working like this for 10 years now. So Maharaj at one level is very considerate but when he sees something as an important service to Shri Prabhupada he expects standards and he himself works extremely hard and he inspires others also to work very hard. So I will come back to this a little later but the point which I was making is that there is sensitivity.

Earlier I gave the example of intensity has to be balanced with sensitivity but now I give this example sensitivity should not lead to lack of intensity. I just said just because we do not want to trouble others but that does not mean the service quality has to go down. Service has to be done intelligently also.

So this is a balance between sensitivity and intensity and this actually is vital for relationships. The fundamental difference between bhakti and other paths of transcendence is that all the other paths are individual paths whereas bhakti is a collective path and all the other paths yoga or jnana especially people the first thing there is they are alone. Krishna says when he talks about the story of Ishtamayoga in the sixth chapter he says first thing there is alone.

But on the other hand when Krishna talks about devotees what does he say 10.9 he says my devotees delight in discussing about me. So bhakti is a collective process and sometimes we feel that actually you know as soon as one is giving a class and I asked you know when we are practicing bhakti we have to tolerate many things. So what are the things we have to tolerate? So one devotee very enthusiastically raised hand.

I said yes we have to tolerate devotees. So I said yes it's a good realization that we have to tolerate devotees and as we advance we will realize that devotees are tolerating us. So in the material world it is true that there are some people with whom we can get along with.

Some people he says that some people they bring happiness where they go and some people bring happiness when they go. So there are some people there are some people are difficult people and actually how we deal with people who are difficult. Actually they may not be difficult people for us sometimes somebody who with whom they can connect with say such a wonderful person she's such a nice person wonderful nice I have never experienced this.

So what happens is we all have our individual natures and sometimes our nature gels with someone's nature and our nature doesn't gel with somebody's nature. So when that happens so once Maharaj was asked this question Maharaj you know we all have our wavelengths but sometimes our wavelength doesn't match with some devotees. So what to do? So Maharaj applied that humility means to change your wavelength so that it matches.

So humility is such a beautiful practical definition. Humility doesn't mean just go down bow down fold your hands and that is good but humility means that we have to change our wavelength so that it matches. Now of course again there is this we cannot endlessly change our own wavelength because we have our nature.

So based on our nature we will naturally gravitate towards some devotees and with some devotees we have we'll have close bonds. Other devotees we may not have close bonds but with everybody we need to have cordial relationships. Some people will get along well some people may not get along well but there is what we can do is we make sure that we don't aggravate matters with everyone.

We make sure that we have at least positive relation not a negative relationship with everyone. We'll have close relationship with everyone sometimes when people have two different natures not T-W-O, T-O-O. So two different the natures are two different and the attempt to come too close causes conflict.

So we have to know intelligently you know which relationship needs how much distance. Some relationships can be a lot of intimacy, some relationships they are best at a distance. In English there is saying that good fences make good neighbors.

Good fences make good neighbors. The fence is not clear when people are nice people. This is my property, this is my property, this fruit was on my tree.

No this fruit was on my tree. Clear demarcation and things are clear. So that way if if we look at the way so I was making this point that sometimes we feel the devotee said that oh I have to tolerate devotees.

I don't want to tolerate devotees. I just practice bhakti alone but we may think that we can practice bhakti alone but the challenge with practicing bhakti alone is that it becomes unnecessarily difficult. Now before I started using the crutches I used to use a walking stick.

My health was a little better at that time. So then first time when I read in Chaitan Charita Amrit that the association of devotees is like a walking stick. I thought this was not a particularly flattering analogy to say.

Now everything associated is so great and to compare it with the walking stick. Walking stick is nothing great. Once I was going from Pune to Mumbai and then in the train somebody stole my walking stick.

Then I got out of the train and I was walking towards the temple. Now without a walking stick also I can walk but then I realized two things. My walking becomes much slower and there is always the risk of falling off.

Then I understood why Krishna asked me that's what we said. Association of devotees is like a walking stick. Without association our progress becomes very slow.

Sometimes if we are chanting all alone then what happens? Sometimes we take out the beads. How did this 108 beads become 1008 beads? Not ending only. So if you have the association then I can practice nicely.

So it becomes easier and then there's always the possibility of falling down. If we are not in association then we can fall down easily. So our association of devotees helps us in moving on.

And if we look at the practice of bhakti, now if you look at say Maharaj's life. Maharaj just he went on the search of God all alone all across the world. So he at once if anybody doesn't need association practice in spirituality, yes he doesn't need association.

If there's anybody like that then he is far more than us. Now how many of us went out to search for God? At least I didn't. Far from going out in search for God, God's devotees came out in search for me.

They came and gave some books, told us about Krishna. So we may sometimes feel like this association of devotees is so troubling. But actually it is that association of devotees which is elevating.

That elevating can happen in two ways. One can be pleasantly and second can be unpleasantly. That means sometimes some devotees by their conduct they inspire us and by that inspiration we become elevated towards Krishna.

And sometimes some association agitates us. But because we are in association even amidst that agitation we take shelter of Krishna. If we are in non-devotee association and we are agitated, see there are these three kleshas in the world.

These are Adhyatmik, Adhibhautik and Adhidaivik. So these past karma we are all going to get some amount of pleasure. Just like just because we become devotees it is not that we will be free from diseases.

We will get diseases. Just because we have become devotees does not mean that if there is a storm and power goes off everywhere and devotees house power will not go off. It is not like that.

So at a material level reactions will come. So similarly there is a certain amount of Adhibhautik klesh that we all have to experience from our surroundings. There is from the people around.

Adhibhautik means its people around us. Adhibhautik klesh actually means there are three examples for this. Mosquito, Mujahideen, Mother-in-law.

So its basically living entities around us. But for most of us terrorists and other things are little far off. They are a fear but not such a big fear.

So it is the people around us, Adhibhautik klesh will come to us. So now if we are in the association of devotees that Adhibhautik klesh has to come from somewhere or the other. So it will come through some devotees.

But the advantage of being in devotee association is that because we are in devotee association in the agitation we will take shelter of Krishna. If we are in non-devotee association we will seek shelter in something mundane and that may contaminate us, that may degrade us. So sometimes we may feel that oh I thought that association of devotees is meant to be so blissful.

But then there is so much trouble over, so much misunderstanding, so many problems. It is not association of devotees that is the problem. It is just the material world that is the problem.

The fact that it is happening in the association of devotees that means we have greater facility to move towards Krishna. When we don't have, if it had happened outside the association then that thing would have taken us away from Krishna. If we consider, as I have seen that, if anybody doesn't need association he could say that Maharaj, he is already so spiritually motivated, practicing meditation, risking his life for the search for God.

But then he not only seeks association, but he actually encourages association. If any of you have been to Radha Gopinath temple or if you see Radha Gopinath temple, that is among the, probably the only temple in the world, there is such a big Vyasasana. Vyasasana itself is made not for one person, it is made for many people.

So, the idea is that there are always, we, when we are in the association of devotees, we get inspiration from multiple sources. Sometimes you may feel that I don't get the association of my spiritual master so much. Yes, that is certainly, as a, Krishna Prabhupada writes in the Kardamuni section that actually a devotee desires to see the Lord, but a devotee doesn't demand to see the Lord.

So, if we don't desire to see, what is our Bhakti? But if we demand, then again what is our Bhakti? Bhakti means we are servants. We are not the boss who can demand. So, we desire but don't demand.

That is devotion and what applies to darshan of the Supreme Lord, that also applies to the association of the, personal association of the spiritual master. Every disciple will naturally desire the association of the spiritual master. But at the same time, a devotee doesn't demand it.

That is the mode of service. Our Bhakti, our devotion means we want it, but we are ready to serve in whatever way we can. In every relationship, there are two aspects.

There is expectation and there is contribution. The expectation is we want, oh, this person should do this, this person should do this, this person should do this. So, there is contribution.

Contribution means what we are expected to do. So, the both of them are important in, for the stability of a relationship. But if we want to deepen the relationship, now we have to maximize our contribution.

And then understanding the nature of the other person, we need to modulate our expectations. Modulate means adjust. Because some people are of a particular nature, they may just not do certain things.

Not because they don't care, but that is not the way they think. That is not the way they are made. So, if we have unrealistic expectations in a relationship, then although the relationship has a possibility to be very good, but the unrealistic expectation makes the relationship feel very unloved.

So, different people have different natures. So, I am talking from our perspective, what we could do. So, if we know, this person is such a person, there are sometimes some people who say something and they forget it.

Now, every time they keep forgetting, and every time we get irritated. After some time, we just learn. A person is a nice person, but if it comes to memory, this person is not reliable.

That is not a character flaw. That is simply a limitation of competence. So, if we continue to have that expectation which that person cannot fulfill, then the relationship goes towards frustration.

So, we just need to adjust our expectations. If you know, okay, this thing is not going to work with this person, then we say, oh, there are so many other things which work nicely. But if you obsess over one thing, then what happens? Then we feel, okay, I am not getting any reciprocation in this relationship.

And then the relationship goes down. Similarly, if we consider the spiritual master, and what the spiritual master gives us, sometimes we, in terms of the spiritual master's relationship with the spiritual master, we focus too much on the personal reciprocation. The personal reciprocation is important.

At the same time, the spiritual master uses a wealth of gifts. I will take three different metaphors to illustrate this. And all of them talk about different aspects of the relationship between the disciple and the spiritual master.

The word sampradaya means samyak roopena pradayati sampradaya. Samyak roopena, that means in complete form, that which gives knowledge, that system which gives complete knowledge in its complete form, that is sampradaya. So, a sampradaya is like a university.

And say, if in a university, we join a particular department, say somebody is going to study particle physics, then they join the physics department, then there is the HOD or the signing authority, by whose sanction, by whose signature, the person gets admitted, the student gets admitted into the university. And once the student is admitted in the university, in say, for example, some department, there will be some very high profile professors who are known all over the world. Now, every student wants to, I want to learn from this professor.

But actually, the student is then the physics department, but there will be many teachers and they can learn from all of them. If they are in a particular, if they are going to do, if the student is going to do a PhD in a particular field, then the student may be assigned to a particular professor who is a PhD specialist in that field. So, the signing authority is the main person in the department and their authority is what enables the student to enter.

But the student s learning is not limited to that person alone. When that say, this famous professor gives classes, everybody growls and hears, and it is wonderful to learn from him. But the student s learning happens from various sources, from many teachers in the department.

So, similarly, if you compare the Sampradaya to university, the spiritual master is the signing authority. It is by the spiritual master s mercy that we enter into the Sampradaya. But once we have entered, then we learn from many sources.

So, our learning is not limited only to our spiritual master. And if the same professor, you could say five star professor, famous professor, has founded the whole department, and then all the faculty that is there is actually trained by that professor, then although the student may not be directly working with the professor, the student is actually getting that professor s guidance through the other professors. The same way, the spiritual master s gift is not just the direct relationship of the disciple with the spiritual master.

The spiritual master s gift is also the whole God family, where we get the spiritual master s guidance through many other devotees. And in that way, the gift of the spiritual master is not just one s personal association, or not just even one s personal instructions, or even the instructions in one s classes. It is actually the introduction to a whole community where we learn.

And by the spiritual master s mercy that we enter into that community, and then we learn from various sources. And the point of the relationship is to go towards Krishna. And the spiritual master s speciality, the spiritual master s benediction to us is, the spiritual master uses many facilities to go towards Krishna.

So, for us, in the Krishna consciousness movement, Shri Prabhupada is a preeminent shiksha guru for everyone. We have many spiritual masters, and they are all the gifts of Shri Prabhupada in our life. And we are his grand disciples.

So, our spiritual master has, in the service of Shri Prabhupada, given us many gifts. And these are all meant to help us go towards Krishna. So, if a student goes to this physics department, he says, oh, this big professor is there, and I will get to study over there.

The student is always expecting that. And because of that, the student doesn t pay any attention to who the other professors are, what the other professors are teaching. And that big professor is a very busy person.

The student may not get to learn from that professor. So, the student continues having that expectation, oh, I should meet this professor, I should learn from this professor. Then the point of learning will be left out.

So, I was talking about this point of expectation and contribution. So, in our relationship with the spiritual master, if our focus, if our conception of the relationship is simply the expectation of the personal reciprocation, the personal association, then we are actually limiting the relationship unnecessarily. The relationship with the spiritual master, the ultimate relationship with Krishna is multifaceted.

And multifaceted means that we can relate in many different ways. So, the shiksha gurus that we have, they are also the representatives of the spiritual master. And if we consider the traditional culture that was there in India, traditionally, the spiritual masters were of two types.

There were sannyasis, and there were the example of, in our Gaudiya Sampradaya, we have, it is said that Madhavendra Puri initiated Advaita Acharya. Now, Madhavendra Puri was a travelling monk. And he initiated Advaita Acharya, and there is no record that they were met again after that.

They may have met, but it is not like a regular meeting. So, the travelling sannyasis, if they became gurus, they would just be travelling to different places. And they would not have a schedule where it can next year when they are going to come.

There is no plan like that at that time. They would go once, whether they will ever come back or not, we don't know. So, it was just like, so then how would the disciple go on? It was by the support of the community.

The spiritual master gives the starting points, spiritual master gives the inspiration, gives the initiation. But then it is the disciple who takes association wherever it is available and moves on. So, the sannyasi gurus were one kind where there was practically no regular follow-up, no regular interaction.

If you see Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and Eswar Puri also, now how many meetings were there actually? So, they met first in Navadvip and then they met in Kashi and Gaya, Gaya, so not Kashi, both Gaya. They met in Gaya. So, the two places they went.

And then Chaitanya Mahaprabhu when he went to Eswar Puri's place, he was so ecstatic. So, there was not so much interaction or one-to-one, but there was great inspiration. So, that was one kind of relationship.

The other kind of spiritual masters were the grahasthas. These, of course, were usually the pujaris of the temples or the mahantas of the math over there, whichever it was. And they would be grahasthas and they would initiate.

And they would become, after the initiation, they would become more like grandparents of the family. It's not exactly. There's always the cultural difference or the cultural reverence for the renounced author.

But then that reverence also creates some distance. You cannot be very intimate in discussing things. It's a little difficult.

So, the grahasthas are spiritual masters. And then when somebody is in grahastha ashram, they have their own life. The spiritual master also had their own life.

And again, the support for the practice of bhakti came from the whole community. Support came from, there were other Vaishnavas who were practicing. So, traditionally in Indian culture, in Vedic culture, in bhakti culture, the spiritual master is the center point of the disciple's connection with Krishna.

But the spiritual master is not the only point of connection. When Shri Prabhupada sat in ISKCON, it was a very exceptional situation. Prabhupada came from India to America and he came to a place where people just did not know anything at all.

When I first came to America on 26th Avenue, and there, even now there is a picture of Hanuman, which is there in the temple, in the 26th Avenue. I first said, the devotees, when they brought that picture, they told her. Prabhupada was very happy, oh, they got this picture.

And they asked, Swamiji, is this a cat? They had no idea. Prabhupada was thinking, there are millions of people who worship Hanuman and they don't even know what this is. They think it has to be a cat.

So Prabhupada, when he came, he had to actually give Krishna bhakti right from zero. There's no support system available. And in order to help his disciples recognize the importance of the spiritual master, the importance of taking guidance from the spiritual master.

Now, Prabhupada, he talked about it a lot in his classes and he emphasized it in his books also. So now what happens in the books, when we see, we may read in the Bhagavad Gita, in the Bhagavatam, we should take guidance from the spiritual master. But you have to understand the spiritual master is not one.

In Chaitanya Chaitanya Amogha said that the shiksha guru, the deeksha guru, the patra darshi guru, they are actually in one sense one. Because it is Krishna who's guiding us through all of them. So what happened in the start of ISKCON, where Prabhupada guided devotees and the spiritual master was in a personal sense central to the lives of the disciples.

That is actually the exception, not the norm. Traditionally, as I said, the spiritual master was there, but the spiritual master was a part of a whole support community. Now, when we read Srila Prabhupada's books and we may read about Srila Prabhupada's interactions with his disciples, we start thinking that is the norm and I don't get association.

That is the exception. So I am being deprived. It is not like that.

We are being provided for. We are being provided for abundantly through the association of devotees. And to the extent we can take this association, we will actually be devotionally enriched.

And to the extent we neglect this association, we, as I said, in the relationship we have to adjust our expectations. If we don't adjust the expectation, we can take an unrealistic expectation, then we feel disappointed, we feel frustrated. So if you understand that the gift of the spiritual master is the whole community of devotees, and then the spiritual master's guidance I can get from many sources.

I can get from senior members of my God family. I can get Prabhupada's guidance, Prabhupada's mercy from so many other spiritual masters. So there is, I'll conclude with this point, this is intensity and sensitivity we're talking about.

So there is the extension of that principle is belonging and segregation. For example, in India, there is the caste system. And the caste system is demonized in the western media.

Oh, the caste system is so atrocious, such a great evil in India. And it is true. There have been many atrocities performed because of the caste system.

But still if we see discrimination has been there everywhere in the world. In America itself, when the Europeans came there, there was not just discrimination against the Native Americans, there was elimination of the Native Americans. It's elimination.

And if you see in India, even if you say there's discrimination against the lower caste, still the lower caste is still existing, they're existing in large number. So what has happened that the focus of the western media, when the western mind, when they talk about the caste system is segregation. Oh, these people were segregated.

But segregation also is just the other side of connection of belonging. So when we say that, okay, the Brahmanas and Kshatriyas were separated, or Kshatriya, Vaishyas and Shudras were separated. The point is that also means Shudras were united.

Vaishyas were united. So the caste actually served as a greater family. So within the caste, there was greater bonding.

So we belong to one unit, that is the family. And beyond that, there is a bigger unit, that is the caste that one belongs to. I don't want to say the word caste also, sometimes it's seen as negative in today's world.

But we all need a sense of belonging to something bigger than ourselves. That's our family or something bigger than our family. So if the focus shifts, in the Brahmanas, we Brahmanas are pure and all these people are impure.

Then the focus has gone from belonging to segregating. The purpose of the caste division is to create a greater sense of belonging among people who are having similar interests. It is not to create discrimination with others.

Same way, when we live in the international society of Krishna consciousness, you know, we, we have, there are different devotees or different spiritual masters. And the purpose of a God family, of the disciples of one spiritual master, it is to increase belonging. It is not to increase segregation.

It is not to increase segregation. So the, in one sense, as soon as we draw a boundary, any boundary we draw, there will be that which is inside the boundary and that is outside the boundary. So as soon as you say, okay, I am the disciple of the spiritual master, then there is a boundary that comes.

And there is somewhere inside the boundary, there will be many who are outside the boundary. But the purpose of the boundary is important. If we start thinking, oh, this boundary, all those who are outside, they are not, they are not serious devotees.

No, we are quality devotees. Actually, this is simply, this is simply the false ego being projected in the spiritual domain. There are many Indians who say, Mera Bharat Mahal.

It is good to think of India as great. But what is great about India? Because I was born there. They will not say it that way so bluntly.

But it is just that, for them, their nationality is simply the extension of their false ego. Yes, there are many great things about India. But what it is great, we have to discover it.

So, otherwise, our protestations or our pretensions, our claim of greatness, it is simply an extension of our false ego. So, same way, with respect to our spiritual master and belonging to a God family, the focus has to be on belonging, not on segregating. If I start thinking, oh, you know, I belong to the, I am a disciple of the spiritual master, therefore, I am great.

That means what it is, the focus is that instead of my connection with the spiritual master destroying my false ego, I am using the connection with the spiritual master to expand my false ego. You are getting this point? It is completely antithetical to the purpose. We relate with the spiritual master so that our false ego gets destroyed and the humble soul can surrender to Krishna.

But then when that whole dynamic is twisted, we think, sure, my spiritual master is great, therefore, I am great. And because I am great, that means proving my greatness requires me to somehow, in some small or big way, prove that others are small. But the beauty of bhakti is that there can be many bests.

There can be many bests. In the bhagavatam itself, or in the bhakti culture, we see some places, Shiva is considered topmost devotee. Other places, Narada is considered a great devotee.

Other places, Prahlad is considered a great devotee. If you see every leela, if you see the Prahlad pastime, the whole pastime is depicted in such a way that nobody is able to defy Hiranyakashipu except Prahlad. Even Narada Muni bows down over that.

Even Lakshmi Devi, she is not able to pacify Narasimha Dev in his anger. Now, actually, Prahlad, he could say that, actually, you know, I have become better than my spiritual master. Narada Muni bowed down to Hiranyakashipu.

I did not bow down. He doesn't think like that. He says, actually, actually, my spiritual master related me for many years.

When nobody else is able to pacify Lord Narasimha Dev, and then Prahlad goes and pacifies. The first words that he says is, My dear Lord, you know, all these devatas, they are situated in the mode of goodness. The words that they spoke are like a flow of nectar.

He says, I was born in the mode of ignorance. I was born in a family of the redeemers. My dear Lord, if they couldn't satisfy you, how can I satisfy you? So, rather than stressing on his greatness, he focuses on his smallness.

So, the point I am making is that the Bhagavatam depicts Prahlad as the greatest devotee when talking about Prahlad. When it is talking about Shukadeva Goswami, at that time, it depicts Shukadeva Goswami as the greatest devotee. Now, Shukadeva Goswami is a spiritual master.

Vyasa Dev is sitting and hearing from him. A spiritual master, Narada Muni is sitting and hearing from him. So, now, does that mean that Shukadeva Goswami is in competition with Vyasa Dev or Shukadeva Goswami is in competition with Prahlad? No.

In different contexts, there can be different devotees who are the best. And in spiritual circle, there can be many bests. So, my spiritual master can be best and someone else's spiritual master can also be the best.

And the inspiration that I can get from my spiritual master does not have to depend on my proving that my spiritual master is better than someone else's spiritual master. It is to simply depend on how I am serving Krishna. How I am serving Krishna.

So, we focus in our relationship. Naturally, if we are all disciples of one spiritual master, there will be greater bonding. But the purpose of this is bonding within.

It is not segregating without. It is not to look down upon others. I will conclude with one incident from Maharaja's life to illustrate this theme.

So, once Maharaja was in Kumbh Mela. When he was in Kumbh Mela, at that time, he was answering questions in our booth. And then, one card carrying Hindu came over there.

He says, Swamiji, which religion did you belong to? Because he could obviously see Maharaja is not Indian. So, Maharaja said that my parents were born in a Hindu family. So, he says, so, you know, what did you find in Hinduism that you did not find in Judaism? So, he says, no, actually, Maharaja is explaining.

No, actually, all religions are paths to God. All religions are paths. We can all, by taking different religions, whichever path we are inspired, we can go towards God.

Like a balanced answer. He says, no, but still you gave up your religion and you took up our religion. So, what was special in our religion? Maharaja said that I don't think I ever gave Judaism or took up Hinduism.

He says, Krishna attracted my heart like no one else. And I have accepted Krishna as my Lord. So, he took the whole dialectic out of my religion and your religion.

He said that it is Krishna who attracted the heart. The same way, the test of our bhakti is not that, you know, okay, I belong to this group or I love this group, I'm a disciple of this guru or disciple of that guru. The point is, we are here to love Krishna.

And if we love Krishna, people will see that and people will be attracted by it. If in the name of our spiritual practices, we are actually loving our own ego and thinking I am great because I am connected with this great person, then we miss out on the purpose of our spiritual advancement, of our spiritual growth. So, our spiritual advancement is based on or its center is how much we love Krishna.

So, I talked about in every relationship, there is expectation and there is contribution. So, the contribution that every disciple can actually make is through service. Wherever we are, actually Prabhupada's special genius was that he made the transcendent very practical.

In one class, Prabhupada defines what is Krishna Consciousness. Now, we can give very many different definitions. Krishna Consciousness means always chant Hare Krishna.

Krishna Consciousness means think about Krishna and Vrindavan. Krishna Consciousness means to be absorbed in the mood of Radharani, separation from Krishna. Yes, all these are true.

Prabhupada in his lecture says, now if you go in a temple, if you go in the temple and you look at the deities and if you feel that the deities are asking you, what are you doing for me? If you feel this, then you are Krishna Conscious. So, we have a relationship with Krishna and the relationship is a relationship of service, it is a relationship of contribution. So, our Krishna Consciousness is not just how much we are remembering Krishna.

If Prabhupada had simply been concerned with remembering Krishna, he could have remembered Krishna much better in Vrindavan. He did not have to come to America to remember Krishna. He came to America and traveled all over the world to help others remember Krishna.

His focus was not on his own remembrance of Krishna. His focus was on his contribution to others. The same way, if we see in our practice of spiritual life, that if our focus is on contribution, is on contribution, how can I serve? So, Maharaj was telling us that when we saw Prabhupada in the last days, all the devotees wanted to be there when we saw Prabhupada.

That is how most of them could not go. Most of them could not go. And when Prabhupada departed, it was devastating.

It was devastating for them. Actually, most of them survived by simply recognizing that Prabhupada has entrusted his legacy to us. Now, we cannot serve him through direct association of but we can serve him through our contribution to his mission.

So, if we look at Maharaj s own life, he did not get much association of Srila Prabhupada. In fact, if we look at his search, many of the other spiritual masters he met, he got to spend a good amount of time with them. He gave his life to Srila Prabhupada.

But he did not get that much association. But then, the focus of his relationship with Srila Prabhupada was through contribution, through contribution. And through that, he becomes such an exalted Vaishnava, so dear to Srila Prabhupada and makes such a valuable contribution to the mission of Srila Prabhupada.

So, if we shift our focus in the relationship, we adjust our expectation and focus on contribution, focus on trying to serve Krishna, then we will find that with that intention to contribute, many things will start working out right. We will find that Krishna and the spiritual master will arrange things for us, will arrange things for us. Srila Prabhupada instructed.

Srila Bhakti Sahasrara Thakur gave Srila Prabhupada instructions, preached all over the world. Now, how to do it, that was up to Srila Prabhupada. And Srila Prabhupada heard the voice of the spiritual master from a person who was simply selling newspapers, the postman.

He said, Swamiji, you write magazine, people will throw it away. You write a book, people will keep it. So, now we could say, Prabhupada could have said at that time, you know, I am a sannyasi guru, what do you know? But he did not have that separation.

He said, this is my spiritual master speaking. So, if we shift the focus from expectation to contribution, I want to serve, then we will find a spiritual master and guide us in many ways. Srila Prabhupada's mood was so extraordinary.

Srila Prabhupada would say that, my disciples are my representatives of my spiritual master. Because I have a desire to serve my spiritual master and I alone cannot serve. So, then he sent so many of the disciples here, so many of the disciples, so they are representatives of the spiritual master who have come to serve, who have come to assist me in the service.

So, when we have this mood of contribution, then whatever we have to do, we will get the facility to do that, we will get the intelligence to do that, we will get the resources to do that. It may take some time to come, but it will come. You focus too much on expectation, you will not get it.

One of the services of the spiritual master is correcting others. Correcting is not something which is very pleasant to do. So, once, as I gave a class in which I spoke something which was insensitive, and then the matter was reported to Maharaj.

So, Maharaj told me, he called me, very lovingly said, you really put your lotus foot in your mouth. So, putting your foot in your mouth is an idiom. It means basically to act in a, to make an embarrassing mistake.

But even without that, the way he says, you put your lotus feet in your mouth. So, actually, even when we have to give correction to others, we have to do it in a very sensitive way. And all that we need for our service to Krishna, we will learn, our service to spiritual master, we will learn, if we have an intention to serve, if we have a desire to make a contribution.

Krishna will give the intelligence by which we can come to him. So, I will summarize. I spoke on the theme of, does anyone remember the topic? Intensity and sensitivity in bhakti.

Yeah. So, I gave examples of how by doing kirtan or japa, we may do kirtan or japa in such a way that it disturbs others. So, we have to balance our own practice of bhakti with helping others also to practice bhakti.

And that's the thing I talk about how Maharaj right from his beginning, he was individually at tremendous intensity in search for God. But at the same time, he has sensitivity in conducting himself to others. He is ready to eat spicy food just so that not to displease somebody who does not even know so well.

And as a part of that, while extending that topic, I mentioned that we have to be sensitive to others, but at the same time, that does not mean our intensity has to go down. We talk about how Maharaj is very diligent, meticulous in proofreading and making sure that the book is of high quality and expects from others also to work hard in Krishna s service. So, we have to intelligently balance both intensity and sensitivity.

If we go towards one extreme or the other extreme, then our bhakti will not be so focused and fulfilling. And that connection I discussed how the practice of bhakti is a collective process. It's not an individual process.

So, the association of devotees is like a walking stick. That means that without it, moving becomes difficult, and you may fall any time. So, association is very valuable.

And there can be great souls who can practice without association, because they have such great spiritual urge. But even they, they set up, they associate and they set an example of associating with others. So, initially, we think that we have to tolerate devotees, then we learn that devotees are tolerating us.

So, our, basically, there will be problems in devotee association also. But that problem is not because of devotee association, it is because of our own past karma. We are going to get certain amount of, because of past karma, we will get Adhyatmik Klesh, we will get Adhidaivik Klesh and we will get Adhibhautik Klesh.

But the Adhibhautik Klesh that we get in the devotee association, that will make us take shelter of Krishna. Because through some devotees, we may get some agitation, some trouble, but other devotees will calm us down. Other devotees will help us move closer to Krishna.

If we are non-devotee association, then we will go away from Krishna. We will take shelter of illusory things. And in the association also, we will, we will find that there are different devotees with whom we can bond in different distances.

So, good fences make good neighbors. So, by understanding what, how close we can be with some different devotees, we can actually move forward steadily in our bhakti, in the relationships. Then I talked about, in any relationship there are two aspects.

There is, there is the expectation and there is the contribution. So, if we expect something that is unrealistic from somebody, then that relationship will never be fulfilled. We need to modulate the expectation.

If somebody is forgetful, and we constantly shout at them, why do you keep forgetting, why do you keep forgetting? No, we have to adjust. So, similarly, in our relationship with the spiritual master, if we expect the personal association of the spiritual master, then we will, we will always feel as if we are not getting what we, what we want in that relationship. A devotee desires, but does not demand.

So, that is the mood. We actually want the personality, but we do not demand it. So, adjusting the expectation means that we recognize that the spiritual master s gifts are not limited just to the personal association.

Spiritual master is like the, like the signing authority in a, the head of a department who introduces us to a whole group of people with whom we can learn. The spiritual master s gift is not just the personal association, not just personal instruction. It is a whole community of devotees through whom we can learn.

So, if we see this, this is the whole, the whole community of devotees, the whole God family, the spiritual master s gift, then we will see that we are, we have been profusely blessed. And we can take guidance, which we certainly take here from the spiritual master, but when guidance is available from senior members of our God family, we take that guidance also. And we can move onwards wisely in our spiritual life.

And I conclude it by talking about how, when there is a God family, there is, the focus can be on belonging or it can be on segregating. In the caste system, those who demonize it, they focus that, oh, there is so much segregation and discrimination. But there is also the caste system functioned as a creator family.

So, for us, if we see the God family as a place where we have a bigger family and the focus on the belonging, then we will be able to maintain the special mode of appreciation and devotion to our spiritual master without needing to, without needing to compete with other devotees, spiritual master with other devotees. In spiritual life, there can be many bests. There can be many bests.

And Maharaj said that, I did not convert from one religion to another. It was like Krishna attracted me like no one else. So, the test of our bhakti is not that, you know, my spiritual master is greater than yours, or I am greater than you.

It is that how much am I attracted towards Krishna. And with that mood, when we focus on the practice of bhakti, then we can move forward steadily. And if we can adjust the expectation, and then focus on Krishna consciousness means to feel that entities are saying, what are you doing for me? If we have that mood of contribution, we will find that spiritual master blesses us with gifts, with guidance from many different directions and we will get the intelligence to move towards Krishna.

Thank you very much. Hare Krishna. Any questions or comments? Okay, yeah.

So, what is Aditya Daivik and Adhyatmik? Adhyatmik refers to the body. Aditya Daivik refers to the nature and the forces controlling nature. So, we are covered in three circles.

We are covered by the body-mind, we are covered by society, and we are covered by nature. It is the natural world, the earth, the stars, the sky. So, through all these, we need all these three for functioning in this.

We need the body, we need a social circle, we need a congenial atmosphere, natural congenial. But all these three can also become sources of misery. So, the misery that comes from the social circle is called Adhibhautik.

The misery that comes from the body and mind is called Adhyatmik. And that which comes from nature is called as Adhi Daivik. We had a question here.

Okay. Any other questions? You told about the sensitivity and the intensity. So, what I got is that you have to compromise outside, you know, somewhere, sometimes, even in Vrishabh.

So, eating outside, that is not a standard. See, that is just an example of how, the point of that, not that we have to fast because we did something wrong. The point of that is, we keep our standards for ourselves.

And we adjust how we follow our standards without coming off as holier than thou to others. What is the question? I am just, what was your question exactly? How to, practically I am asking you just to just follow. Yeah.

We gave this example and then he did the part. So, for him, he did so many times. Okay.

So, first of all, this was a, okay, okay, I understand. So, if we have to, and practically living in the world, we cannot follow certain standards, then what should we do? See, it is not that all standards are of equal importance. There is a Chinese 16th round, that is a wow.

Following the four regulative principles, that is a wow. Apart from that, there are many other things which are favorable for makti. But they are not like wows.

So, those how we adjust, that is up to time, place, circumstance. It is like say, we can have a scale of standards. The highest standard of prasadam can be food that is, food that is made such as the grains are sowed by devotees, is harvested by devotees, it is cooked by devotees, it is served by devotees, it is honored by devotees.

That is the highest standard. From that point onwards, we can have various levels. We could also have food that is cooked outside, but it is offered and is honored by devotees.

So, all is a continuum. The higher the standard, the better it is. But if somebody says, no, I need non-vegetarian, that is the absolute no-no.

So, from this standard to this standard, food which is completely in the devotional process and food that is last offered to Krishna and then taken. All this is within the acceptable range. But below that, that is unacceptable.

So, like that, within this acceptable range, where we situate ourselves, that will depend on our time, place, circumstance. That is something which is adjustable. We use our God-given intelligence and understand how I can best function in the situation and act accordingly.

Once or twice, if the situation is there that we can eat outside and we can manage by eating some food or something. But if the situation is like, you know, very different, you know, we have to go outside, you know, get food or cooked food, you know, home-cooked food or something. Then, is it okay to just get some Indian food and… See, some things has to be adjusted according to our circumstance.

We do not have to be fanatical about this. The point of the food is that whatever food we eat, it affects our consciousness. So, we want to have the food that is the most healthy for our purification of our consciousness.

But suppose, sometimes the effort to get, suppose, they should always eat only devotional cooked food. Sometimes the effort to get food that is cooked by devotees may be so great that we do not have time for chanting after that. Because you have to go to so much trouble to do all that.

And chanting is much more important. So, we have to understand the hierarchy of priority. So, there are many different principles in bhakti to follow.

But there are certain principles which are very central. And we need to focus on following those first. And other principles we follow as much as is possible.

So, in a way, we were saying that there are so many other things we can not avoid, but we have to maintain our standard. A couple of days back, you were talking about, you are not doing good, so it may be a toll on your spiritual master's health. If you… It may be a toll on your spiritual master's health.

If what? If you are not following the proper, means apart from the four bow we take, but that we follow. But apart from that… Such as? I was saying that if we eat outside, is it going to affect the human's health? Because this kind of discussion was going on in the group. So, they were saying that, no, no, you are initiated.

If you eat outside or if you go for like a movie or something. So, it may help, but it may be, you know, affect your spiritual master's health. So, I just want to clarify that.

How can they help? Being initiated. So, if somebody is an initiated devotee and then they say eat outside or go watch a movie or do something which is not expected of a devotee. Will that affect the health of the spiritual master? See, bhakti is to be practiced out of love.

It is not to be imposed by fear. Occasionally fear is fine. It's like parents.

Sometimes they might go, if you do this, this will happen, this will happen. They might scare the child sometimes. But the point is not that the child always be fearful and out of fear do the right thing.

The point is the child grow up, recognize once intelligently that what my parents are telling is good for me. And then accordingly do that thing. So, we shouldn't become too paranoid about karma considerations.

If you are constantly thinking, okay, this is not good karma, this will cause bad karma. It's good to consider karma considerations, but our primary focus should be on service. So, we have a relationship with our spiritual master.

And our relationship is that, especially when we take initiation, that means we are committing to the process of bhakti. It's a commitment. And rather than focusing on what we should not do, it's far better to focus on what we can do or what we should do.

The more we fill our life with constructive activities in service of the spiritual master, the more these other things will get adjusted. So, in general, sometimes some devotees may speak certain things. That is, like a mother, because the child is very restless.

Mother says, if you go out of the house alone, you'll get kidnapped. It's possible. But that's not the point.

The child has to be intelligent when I should go or when I should not go. Mother may speak up statements, but they are not like absolute statements. The point is, we have to look at the intent.

So, the intent is to be understood and it is to be appreciated. Similarly, as devotees, especially when we are initiated, we are focused on developing a relationship with the spiritual master and serving the spiritual master. So, then if we are doing things which are contrary to the mode of service, then that is undesirable.

And to stop somebody from doing those undesirable things, sometimes some statements will be made like that. But the focus should not be on those statements alone. We don't want to practice a fear-based conception of bhakti.

We want to come to the level of affection-based conception of bhakti. So, Srila Prabhupada did say once or twice on some occasions that, you know, spiritual master suffers because of the wrongdoings of the disciple. But if we look at all of his books, how often has he spoken that? He did not want to make his disciples practice bhakti by sending them on a guilt trip.

He wanted them to use their intelligence, understand that bhakti practice is in my best interest. So, Prabhupada, if you see that way, how often did he talk about hell also? All the fixed kind of talks about hell. Many Christians, their preaching is, if you don't surrender to Jesus, you are going to go to hell.

Prabhupada never uses that approach. Prabhupada uses the approach, you are not the body, you are the soul. Therefore, why are you wasting your time in pandering to the body? His approach was based on intelligence.

So, in general, we should also not propagate, nor should we obsess over the fear-based motive for practicing bhakti. If somebody else is doing that, we understand and appreciate their intent. But we focus on using our intelligence to philosophically understand how bhakti practice is in our best interest and practice bhakti accordingly.

Does that answer your question? Anyone else have questions? You were talking about relationship issues amongst the devotees. You said how if you have relationship problems amongst non-devotees, and you are non-devotee, then you are lost. But if you are in devotee circles, then there is chance for elevating consciousness.

But sometimes we see that people lose appreciation. When they get into this relationship problems, people lose appreciation for Krishna consciousness. They may become fearful to come into an association, or to the temple.

They just want to keep distance. So, what can be done? And also the other statement you have said, that it is just some sort of karma that we have to suffer. If we are in an association, we are suffering the devotees.

And when we are outside, we have to deal with others. But somehow, in my life, what I observed was, I keep dealing with my colleagues at my office, dealing with other friends and everything. So, even with so much of interaction over the years, we don't run into this relationship issues as much as we see in devotee associations.

So, how can we understand that? So, the question is that, when, if there is some agitation or strain in relationship in devotee association, sometimes some people just go away. And they stay away from devotees. So, is it that relationship problem in devotee association will always make us take shelter of Krishna more? See, there is one thing that we should note, paint all devotee association in one color.

Devotees are individuals. And some people get along with some people, some people don't get along with some people. That is just a fact of life.

And that would happen in devotee association also. So, in devotee association also, if you find that we don't get along with some people, rather than labeling devotee association as bad, we have to find out other devotees with whom we can get along. And we will always find like-minded devotees.

Because different devotees have different definitions of success in everything. So, based on the particular definition of success that a devotee is having, what happens is, they see everything in those terms. And when somebody else is working in a different way, they just can't appreciate that.

So, if we feel inspired to practice bhakti, and we are feeling that in the devotee association this is not working, then either we have to change our definition of success, and then we will find appreciation, or we have to find that association where the definition of success is appreciated. So, it's vital not to brand all devotees in one color. It is just not true, that every devotee is an individual.

And when I started writing, when I started writing, I used to, before I was introduced to Krishna Consciousness, I used to read, Times of India had a spiritual column called the Speaking Tree. So, I used to read that since my childhood. One day I will write for the Speaking Tree.

And then I came to Krishna Consciousness, I had not come to Krishna Consciousness actually, I just came to the Krishna Consciousness movement. So, I started writing, and then I started publishing articles back to Godhead. And then I submitted the article to the Speaking Tree.

And then one day my article got published. I was so happy. I came and told the devotees, I told the Brahmacharis, my article was published in the Speaking Tree.

Now, Times of India is the world's biggest newspaper. Indians are, a lot of Indians read English. And then, Speaking Tree is a column which is read by really intelligent people.

People who think they are intelligent. Whatever it is. But I was very happy.

As far as I know, never before any other scorned devotee had written that. So, then I came and told, my article was published in the Speaking Tree. Just got all blank stares.

One devotee asked, how does a tree speak? So, I was totally deflated. Totally deflated. But then a few days later, Jaidut Maharaj came there.

Jaidut Maharaj is, he is an editor, writer. And then I told him about, I showed him some of my articles. He was so happy.

He was so appreciative. So encouraging. Then I asked Maharaj, how can I improve my writing service? Maharaj gave me a long list of books.

This was 2003. There was no Amazon in India at that time. Not active.

So, most of those books were not available in India. So, then three months later, going through called me from Mumbai. And he said, I had met Jaidut Maharaj in America and he has sent some books for you.

So, it was just one meeting I had, but he went to America. He remembered America. He went to a shop, purchased the books, found out a devotee was coming to India and sent the books.

So, now, I don't blame the Brahmacharis who are there with me. For them, the Brahmachari life is a very insular life. So, for them, writing and speaking to them, what's so exciting about it? But for Jaidut Maharaj, he is into writing, he appreciated that.

So, if I am inspired to do a particular service, then I have to find an association that inspires me. Or, if I can't find that association or I don't want to take the labor to find that association, then I have to adjust and find inspiration whatever is being done in the association over there. So, it's vital that we don't fail all devotee association in one go.

There will be agitation that will come because of may I feel that certain devotees are not reciprocating with me in a particular way or whatever. But then, if we look for, we will find other association that will inspire us. So, it's vital for us to seek the association that inspires us.

That's like, if there is standard food available somewhere and if we have some weakness or some health issues because of which that food doesn't nourish us, then it is our responsibility. We can't blame that why are my special needs not being taken care of. There is nothing wrong.

The standard food is good. But if I have special needs, then I have to take the responsibility to make sure the special needs are taken care of. It is not that I am bad because I have the special needs nor are the food supplies bad because they are not provided.

It's just that we have different needs. So, if we have this attitude that devotee association is multicolored and for my sustainable practice of bhakti, I have to find a devotee association that inspires me. Then, we will not have so much, we will not feel unsheltered.

Because, some association will not get sheltered but some other association will get sheltered. And that way, we can move onwards in our bhakti. And also it is important to find out if there is something which we are doing which is alienating others also.

We may feel that we are getting neglected or rejected or whatever the devotee association. But sometimes it may be that we are also doing something which is alienating others. So, we can do that introspection also.

But both things are there. That we try to improve ourselves but we also recognize that that devotee association is not monochrome. It is multichrome.

And we can find, even if we don't find shelter in one place, we find shelter in some other place. Not just a place, I don't mean physical place. I mean basically the conception of success that is there in bhakti.

Somebody who is a book distributor and their focus is all on book distribution. If somebody is going to do shastric study, he will say, what are you gaining by shastric study? How many people have become devotees by your memorizing of verses? That's a different definition of success. So, if I have to study shastra, then I have to associate more to those devotees who are inspired to study shastra.

So, by finding out the definition of success that is inspiring us and then finding out the association where that definition of success is appreciated, we will find that not only will we get sheltered in devotee association, but we will be inspired further in devotee association. The other question was, sometimes in devotee association, there is so much stress and agitation, but in non-devotee association, if you work in company, although you work for so many years, there is not so much stress. Yes, that is because there is a whole different set of expectations and a different code of conduct that we apply.

A simple example, there is a paper published in London School of Economics somewhere, when the office becomes home. What was that about? That there are many people who prefer to spend more time in office even when they don't have work. Why? Because if they go home, they can't get along with their spouse.

They have children at home, they don't know how to manage them. On the other hand, in the office, everything is structured. Okay, there is a structure system for this, there is a system for this, system for this.

And nowadays with sexual morals and also going down, people have relationships, affairs at office also. So, they feel that actually office is providing everything to them. So, if I go to home, there is so much agitation here.

I stay in office, everything is nice. But the problem here is that the same people, if they get angry, even if you are angry with a colleague, will not shout at the colleague. Will behave in a very civilized way.

But at home, if we get angry, they immediately blast out. What has happened is our own set of expectations are different. We, whenever there is a close relationship, there is a different set of expectations.

Our own conduct becomes different, our expectations of others become different. And that is why where there is greater, wherever there is greater expectation, then there is also the possibility of greater frustration. If you look in office, now how many times do we really have heart-to-heart discussion with people? That which is the closest to our heart, how often do we discuss that? It is basically, basically professional discussion.

And it's like if something doesn't touch the heart, it will not hurt the heart also. So, in office, it's like when we are working, we don't have that much relationship issues because we are not that emotionally invested in those things. But, I mean, if you, if those are emotionally invested in trying to go up and grow, then they'll know there's so much politics in office also.

So much backbiting and this and that. So much tribulation that happens. So, usually, for us as devotees, we are far more emotionally invested in devotee association.

And because we are emotionally invested there, so we can get emotional fulfillment, but we can also get emotional frustration. So, it's just a result of being emotionally, not being emotionally invested in non-devotee association as the stakes are not so high for us in terms of what we value. And because also things are much more organized and structured, so the chances of conflict also become lesser.

Whereas in devotee association, we are much more emotionally invested and often things are not all that structured and organized. So, whenever there's conflict, there's chaos. And that leads to a lot of hard work.

It's not that, now having said this, it is possible also that sometimes some non-devotees may actually be more sattvic. Not sattvic in the full sense of following the principles, but sattvic in terms of conduct. They may be more courteous, they may be more competent, more responsible, more sensitive in their speech.

It's possible. And sometimes some devotees, they may have come from rajasic, tamasic background. They are practicing bhakti now, but still that rajoguna, tamoguna is there.

So, they may speak in ways which hurt us. They may do something which really irritate us. So, it's not that we have to wear rose-colored glasses and say that all devotee association is good and all non-devotee association is bad.

Or that all non-devotee association is bad and all devotee association is good. If you understand the principle, my spiritual advancement is my responsibility. Then I will select the environment that will help me to grow my spiritual life.

So, in devotee association also, if we become emotionally invested too much in some situation where there is a whole different definition of success, then things will not work so. So, generally speaking, it is best to, best to, basically, okay, I'll put it this way. When we are working in a devotee community, there are three broad ways in which we can work.

One is, we just, whatever system is there, we join the system and the full facility and the power of the system, we get that, we rise up by that. The other is, we want to do something on our own as per our inspiration, our vision. Then we are literally on our own.

We have to take the vision, we have to put in the effort, we have to do everything. It's not easy, but if one is driven, one may do that. But the best situation, at least in the initial years of our spiritual life, is to be somewhere in between.

That means we are doing some substantial part of our spiritual life under senior guidance. At the same time, the seniors are also understanding and they give us some room for doing things our way. How to find that balance, that will depend on every individual time situation.

But the problem comes when we are in the, either in the third and we have the expectation of the first. That means if I have, if I want to do according to my own vision, generally, I mentioned that the other day also, and we don't get freedom and facility both together. You want freedom, you will not have facility.

Because those who have facility, they will have their own vision. And that's how they want to implement things. And if you want facility, then you won't have freedom.

That's how it works everywhere. So it's best to be situated somewhere in between, where we have some freedom to do something according to our inspiration. But at the same time, we are also connected with senior devotees and are working with them.

And we have some facilities, make sure that we don't feel like, you know, we are like pushing a mountain all along. So how to work out that balance, we can see. But basically, we are much more emotionally invested in devotee association.

And that's why the potential for feeling disappointed or having relationship problems, that's much more. But although the possibility is there, the possibility for emotional fulfillment is also far, far greater. And that is how it is everywhere.

When there is a risk of loss, there is also the chance of gain. So we need to… It is not just because I am in devotee association that everything is wonderful. It is what am I doing in devotee association that is important.

It's like say… I'll conclude with this. It's a commercial example. But it's like say, people go to stock exchange.

They have money. Now a stock exchange is a place where people go to earn money or to increase their money. But it is not that just by going to stock exchange their balance, their investment is going to improve.

They will lose their investment also. They have to intelligently manage their investment so that it will grow. So like that we have our emotions.

We come in the devotee association where we want to enrich our emotions. We want to purify, elevate and make our emotions devotional. So we bring the investment of our emotions in devotee association.

But then it is for us to invest it properly. If we don't invest it properly, then the whole stock can go down. But if we invest it properly, there is tremendous facility for us to raise the stock.

So where we have not invested much money, there is not much possibility for loss also. That's why sometimes non-devotee association seems to be much more, much more conflict free as compared to devotee association. But that is because conflict occurs only when there is an emotional investment.

If there is no emotional investment, then what is the reason for conflict? You know, if somebody somewhere, if somebody in the neighborhood, a person goes and encroaches into the house of B, we are not emotionally invested over there. If somebody comes and encroaches in my house, how will we do this? So we are emotionally invested. Emotional investment has to manage wisely so that there is emotional fulfillment that comes from that.

Did I answer your question? Thank you. Very interesting. So, do we have time? It's very important.

I think this is it. Okay, maybe one last question. Others can, personally you can do.

We also have some books. Although those are not for sale. Those are only for, if you look at the books and if you want some books, you can let me know and I can note down your order.

The books are on their way. They have not yet reached. So, we don't know whether they will reach during the stay here.

So if you want books, let me know and I can make the order when the books come. Okay. Yes, ma'am.

You mentioned about the conflict studies. Yeah. So if you could, the mother is the person who counted up and everybody else, the other person, maybe they should have maybe they should have a reference from them.

But the person who signed up, you know, how much ever interest he has, others cannot have the same level of interest they have, right? So, where I am going is other kids may not be interested in particular about maybe somebody else because he has to take time for his decision. Correct. Yeah.

So how to see this picture because this is what we are facing here, right? And it could not have helped in a very big challenge in that where we have to look at a man and see whether other men are doing other things. Okay. So, we, we don't get the association of our spiritual master and other spiritual masters, they have their own disciples to take care of.

So we don't, so they can't give us that much time. And that's how we, we don't get that much attention or association. We have to depend on our senior, our senior godbrothers or godsisters.

Yes, that's true. I would say two things over here. First is that I said this spiritual master's gifts come in different ways.

So, while Radhaatma himself is not easily accessible, no, he has created a system by which his senior, senior disciples are often well-trained and they are quite available to us. In other cases, the spiritual master themselves are very easily available, but then they don't have such a well-trained system of disciples. Then if the spiritual master is not available, then it's like you have great wealth and then you have poverty.

Extreme is there. But in this case, it's not, so there are, there is, in this material world, nothing that is a pure blessing and nothing that is a pure curse. It's always good, plus and minus of everything.

So, I would say that for us, the association of the spiritual masters of our God family, senior members of our God family, that is the way we can get the association of the spiritual master. And within that also we find some devotees with whom we can connect with. And if we find the devotees whom we can connect with, we will find that they, they do care for us and we will be added and sheltered in their association.

As I said, again, we have to take the time and the effort to recalibrate our expectation so that we see the blessings in what is available. And then we will find that the blessings are very much there. That's the first point.

The second point is that, again, the, the different spiritual masters, they all have their own disciples to take care of. More than, it is like, more than disciples, spiritual masters and disciples, if we focus on contribution, you know, if we start doing a tangible service, then that service leads to connections. And through that service, relationships develop.

For me as a writer, there are not many devotees in my God family, in our God family who are writers. Some of my closest relationships are with devotees who are, or other good disciples. And that makes no difference to any of us.

Many of my best friends are Gahastas. It doesn't make any difference to them that I am a Brahmachari or for me that they are Gahastas. So actually, a connection primarily is developed through service.

Initially, it is just we come in association and we get guidance. But over a period of time, we focus on doing some tangible service for Krishna. And through that service, gradually, we will find that we will develop fulfilling relationships.

And then, whether it is our spiritual master or some other spiritual master, it is our spiritual master, our spiritual master disciples or other spiritual master disciples, it won't matter so much. The important thing is that we have the right foundation for the relationship. And that right foundation is contribution or service.

So, we will of course need guidance about how to serve, how to develop ourselves in that service. But gradually, if we keep doing that, then, we will find that once we start doing a service well, then, there are so many doors that open up for association, for upliftment, for engagement, for guidance. So, again, instead of focusing on expectation, we focus on contribution.

We can see whatever abilities we have, whatever interests we have, and we try to take up a tangible service. And through that service, relationships will not only develop, but they will have an enduring foundation. Is that your question? Thank you very much.

Al Fatiha.