CC daily 136 – M 6.200 – Pride alters our destination by distorting our vision

Thank you Chaitanya Charita Amrit Madhya Leela Chapter 6 Celebration of Sarumattacharya Text 200 ye hota sakshat krishna mui na jaaniya maha aparadha kainu garvit haiya Sarumattacharya is stunned by the incredible scholarship of Lord Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and he has finally come to the realization that Lord Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is Krishna himself and in the previous verse it said that as he got this realization he started condemning himself condemning himself for not having realized such a vital truth about Lord Chaitanya about Chaitanya Mahaprabhu so in this verse he is saying that actually garvit haiya it is because of pride that I could not recognize the reality now pride it is said famously from the biblical saying that pride cometh before a fall now usually when a person falls the word fall has a physical meaning as well as a metaphorical meaning fall means that somebody say is walking along and if there is a banana peel or some other slippery thing like that say there is water spill person slips and falls on that so fall as a physical activity refers to coming down onto the ground in a very disgraceful unbecoming even ludicrous way sometimes somebody slips and falls other people may laugh at it also how this person has fallen see of course that is an uncultured way to behave somebody has fallen others should go to lift up that help that person rise not laugh at that person but still laughing is considered to be quite ungraceful and often people say that are you hurt? then people may say nothing except my pride is hurt so the point is that something which is like fall is a physical thing but along with that there is a metaphorical meaning of the word fall and it is that in that sense that the bible uses pride cometh before a fall that a person is situated at a high position or a person imagines that I am situated at a high position and from that position someone falls down so somebody may think say for example that I am so intelligent I am so clever somebody in spiritual standard may think I am living such a pure life and that same person may eventually find oneself shackled by attachments so renunciates if they become proud and they think that oh we are so renounced these householders are so fallen and then the renunciates may in future not be able to maintain the standard of renunciation and suffer a fall so pride cometh before a fall refers to also this metaphorical notion of falling down now usually now a person falls because that person does not notice what is ahead sometimes there are various popular and to some extent precise representations of the idea of a proud person some proud people look down at others through their nose it is normally when we talk with someone you know we are face to face with either person but when we if we deliberately look upwards slightly and then tilt our head upwards and then look down through our nose at that person that is also considered a popular popular in the sense that not that people like it popular in the sense that that is a popular representation of pride that is one of the common ways in which pride is depicted in various art forms in caricatures or whatever then the point is that usually if a person is walking with one's head high up and the person often doesn't look at what is there below and that's how the person slips and falls and just as pride is associated with a destination so if you are proud you will fall so pride is also associated with the vision and that vision is a vision of a selective perception wherein one sees only the things that assist to that help one to maintain one's pride and one doesn't see the things that don't support one's proud vision that means a proud person doesn't at all see what are the reasons by which or what are the factors by which someone may or may not be doing something or not doing something this person says oh is this person honoring me or not honoring me and pride is often associated with this perception of blinding this imagery of a person become blind by pride in fact it is associated with various anarthas it is often said that anger blinds or it is said that lust blinds in general the anarthas they make us blind to everything except the object that we want to perceive according to the current desire that is dominating us so when we are blinded by lust at that time when we are blinded in this case by pride then anything that will force us to become humble we just don't see that even if we see we neglect even if not consciously subconsciously somehow the mind shifts our vision elsewhere so that we don't perceive it so now for example say if a batsman is if a cricketer is very proud then that cricketer will always remember all the or remember and parade and remind others and talk about all the good performances all the star performances that that cricketer has done but will deliberately try to downplay or rationalize the times when the cricketer performed bad so now in this particular context Swarupacharya is saying that it was a pride that prevented me from understanding Chaitanya Mahaprabhu's divinity now where is he referring to Swarupacharya did not act in an explicitly arrogant way at any time he was acting in the mood of a sanyas in the mood of a householder who actually hosted Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and who fed Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and he served him in various ways by arranging for a proper house and everything else for him properly of course the main phase where to some extent we can say Swarupacharya's pride comes up is when he tries to he tries to he suggests that I can get Chaitanya Mahaprabhu re-initiated in a more respectable sampradaya in a more respectable sampradaya and at that time Gopinathacharya who is Swarupacharya's brother-in-law says that no that's not required because Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is God himself he is beyond all material designations and then at that time he argues how can he be God where is the scriptural reference that someone is God there is an elaborate philosophical discussion at that time that is one place where Swarupacharya sticks to his opinions and now at that time Gopinathacharya and Mukunda and Govinda Mukunda so at that time they consider they feel that Swarupacharya is being offensive to Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and they are upset at that time so so he says this is Krishna himself but I didn't recognize him therefore I committed great offence to him because I had been proud so what the nature of the offence is he feels we will discuss in our future talks.