Changing our habits through bhakti | Vrindavan school

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I'll talk about the concept of Samskaras and the Samskara is impression that is formed within us. Suppose say somebody is using a phone and say we have a device and we have visited a particular website. Say suppose somebody is, have any of you heard this small thing that is there in Mumbai? Everybody all over the world has heard about it.

You know, you people who don't know I was in Phoenix at an airport and I landed. There was a Nigerian woman. When I travel I use a wheelchair assistant.

So there was a Nigerian woman who was a wheelchair assistant and she started speaking to me in Hindi. I asked her how do you know Hindi? She said by watching Bollywood movies. So generally when we go to America people often mistake us to be Buddhist monks.

So she said are you a Hindu? I said that was the first time somebody recognised me. She said I have seen Hindi movies. So I know that you are a Hindu monk.

So suppose somebody has visited a website like Bollywood.com and maybe say they have visited 100 times. And now they come to a spiritual talk like this and they hear about Bhagavad Gita. Maybe they have heard about it before but now they become interested in it.

And they want to know more about Bhagavad Gita. So at that time they go to their device, they open their browser and they type Bhagavad Gita. When they type B what happens? Bollywood comes as an autocomplete.

Now they may not want to go to Bollywood at that particular point. But it still comes as an autocomplete. So it is not that the device is bad.

It's not that the device, sometimes we say device is the cause of vice. So vice is lust, anger, greed. Now the device is not the cause so much.

It is more a channel. So the vice is there inside us. But anyway the point is that it is not the device is bad.

But what we have visited before, our browser history is stored and then that comes as an autocomplete. So in many ways our mind works like a browser. So everything that we do that gets stored in the mind.

So what is like the browser history is the same as the mind's samskara. So for example if we are upset with someone and when we are upset with someone one part of us may say yell at that person, shout at that person, hit that person. Another part of us may say let's try to calm down, take a few deep breaths, count till ten, we walk away from there, we will deal with this when we are calmer.

Suppose we give it to the person, part of us says shout at it, maybe hit the person. So when we do it for the first time, after all they say I am sorry, I didn't mean anything bad, please excuse me, please forgive me. And we have been forgiven.

Or sometimes if we are more powerful and other person is very scared of us, don't tell anyone otherwise I will show you what I can do really. And maybe that person doesn't tell anyone and we think I can get away with it. Now when this happens, what is, we may get away from the external consequence but actually internally that samskara is formed.

It's like in our mind's browser history that has been stored and next time when we feel irritated, we feel upset, again the tendency to yell will come. The tendency to hit the other person will come. So everything that we do that gets, that creates an impression within us.

So basically the sequence is, you could say there is action. The action has an outer result. The outer result may be that like if we hit someone and it's reported to the authorities then maybe we are punished for that.

That's the outer result. Now sometimes the outer result may not come immediately. But there is an inner result.

And the inner result is that an impression. So if you consider this is the mind, on the mind an impression, a samskara is formed. And from that samskara comes a proposition.

Like when we type B, the browser gives a proposition. Go to Bollywood.com. Now that proposition leads to repetition of the action. Now when there is repetition, then again there could be an outer result.

But there is also an inner result. Now what is the inner result? The samskara actually becomes doubled. It's like say, if somebody has visited Bollywood.com once, then if they type B, Bollywood might come as autocomplete.

But if they have visited 100 times, maybe they don't even have to type B. Bollywood.com is their homepage only. As soon as they open the browser, automatically they go straight to Bollywood.com only. So it's almost like over a period of time the samskaras become so deep that between the action and the proposition there is no time at all.

So this is the stage of addiction. Addiction means what has happened is the thought comes inside and immediately action happens. One doesn't even think whether I should do this or not do it.

And as neuroscience is advancing, it is being found more and more, neuroscience is the study of the brain, in neuroscience it has been found that people who are addicted, actually their brain wiring is different from the way the brain wiring is there for ordinary people. So basically in our brain there are synapses, there are brain cells and brain cells link at a particular point called synapses, the dendrites and synapses. So the neurones that fire together wire together.

And when they get wired together, then that kind of thinking, that kind of emotion, that kind of action becomes almost automatic. So this is how basically when we act once, twice, thrice, four times, then that kind of action not only becomes easy, there are two things that happen through repetition. On one side that same action becomes easy but not doing the same action, that ends up becoming difficult.

So if somebody has devices, now here you have rules that you don't have devices and sometimes you feel you are deprived of devices. Yes, there may be some truth to that. But what is very much a danger is if somebody has devices, just constantly keep using the device, using the device and then just can't stop using the device.

There was a survey in America where a kid said that if some thief came and they said we will take away your phone. He said I don't mind losing my hand but I don't want to lose my phone. Now it's okay, a phone is important but a hand is a much more valuable thing.

You may have heard also about how sometimes people try to take risky selfies and they may be at the edge of a cliff and somebody there to take a selfie. So now what happens is, who is going to be so foolish? Yeah, most people would not be that foolish. But once one has the habit, okay, I want to take a sensational selfie.

So one sensational selfie, second sensational selfie, third sensational selfie, the samskara is formed. And once this impression is formed, then even when they go to a beautiful hill station, their focus is not so much on looking at the beauty of the hill station, their focus is on telling others that I saw this beauty. So because of that what happens? They start doing things which are much more risky than otherwise.

So the samskaras are formed inside us. And when these samskaras are formed, when these impressions are formed, they lead us to do actions even without our wanting to. Even when we want to do something different.

So like I want to go to visit magoita.com but as soon as I type B, Bollywood comes in. So now what is the solution over here? Sometimes we may all decide I want to do something. Maybe I want to exercise regularly.

I want to have a regular study habit. I want to do this regularly, that regularly. But we resolve to do it, but sometimes we may not be able to do it.

And we sometimes think, okay, I just don't have enough willpower. If only I had more willpower, I would be able to do it. And yes, there is some truth to that.

But actually willpower is important but there is something much more important. Much more important than willpower here is wisdom. Wisdom about how things happen in the inner world.

Like if somebody's device has Bollywood as an autocomplete and they say I am not going to visit Bollywood.com, I am not going to visit Bollywood.com. But that is the homepage or that is just coming as autocomplete. And by their determination, I don't want to visit Bollywood.com, Bollywood.com. That autocomplete is not going to change. By their willpower, their browser history is not going to be deleted.

Their browser history is going to be as it is now. With respect to our devices, we can delete our browser history. We can format our device only.

We can get a new device. But with respect to our mind, none of these options are there. There is no deleting.

There is no formatting. There is no replacing. There is none of these possible for us.

So what can we do then? The only thing possible for us is rewriting. Like say somebody has visited Bollywood.com. Then if they want to visit Bhagavata.com, they have to type B-H-A-G-A-V-A-D-G-I-T-I. Now this is 12 letters.

For somebody, just one click and go to Bollywood.com. Typing 12 letters can seem like lifting a 100 kg weight. All the time 12 letters. But you do that.

Now if somebody just does that 5 times, 10 times, what happens by that? Then next time when they type B, then still Bollywood.com might be the first autocomplete. But at least Bhagavata.com will come as the second autocomplete. And if they keep visiting Bhagavata.com, maybe they visit 50 times, then what will happen? Bhagavata.com will become the first autocomplete.

So basically this is all the magic of repetition. So rather than focussing on willpower, I will not do this, I will not do this, just focus on repetition. Instead of saying what I will not do, just focus on doing the right thing.

Now in between, suppose somebody is not attentive and they visit Bollywood.com. Okay, you went there, not such a big deal. As soon as you realise, come back from there, visit Bhagavata.com. So say whenever we feel a little down, whatever I feel down, I just take a blanket and go to sleep. Or I just become sullen and sulky and disagreeable.

Or maybe if I feel down, maybe I can sing some kirtan, maybe I can go for a walk in nature, take some deep breaths, calm me down, calm myself down. So try to rather than, see when you talk about repetition, what is our focus? Not so much fighting against an unhealthy behaviour or unhealthy habit. If somebody is just simply focussing, I don't want to go to Bollywood.com, I don't want to go to Bollywood.com, that is not going to change the browser history.

So this is not very helpful actually. But if one is fighting to build a healthy habit, okay, whenever possible, let me go to Bhagavata.com. Whenever possible, let me do something positive. So then what will happen is this healthy habit will work for us.

Say now, sometimes when you go to college, you might have, you might be going to a previous school, there might be some kids who are bullies. And suppose there is a small kid and there is a big bully. And that bully terrorises the small kid.

Now if this kid is a small kid over here, and there is a huge bully. And this bully terrorises this kid and says, okay, tomorrow I am going to the gym. And I will push weights and then I will beat up this bully.

Well, that's possible, but that's going to take a long time. So instead of focussing on fighting against this bully, if this person makes friends with another strong person, then what will happen is he will deal with that person. So rather than fighting against a bully, we fight to make friends with somebody who is just as strong or stronger than the bully.

And then that friend will deal with the bully. So like that, this bully is our unhealthy habit. So instead of trying to fight against the unhealthy habit, this friend is the healthy habit.

So fight to build this healthy habit and let your healthy habit fight against the unhealthy habit. It's like if somebody focusses just on getting Bollywood.com out, it's not going to work. But let me visit Bhagavidya.com again and again.

And then Bhagavidya.com will come as the first autocomplete. Bollywood.com will automatically go down. So basically the Bhagavidya.com is fighting against Bollywood.com in your browser list.

That's coming first. So when you wake up in the morning, you chant Hare Krishna, say four rounds, you do aarti, you might feel, oh, this is all such a burden. Why do I have to do this every day? But this is creating good samskaras in your mind.

And we may not immediately realise what is the point of all this. But all these impressions, they are healthy impressions inside us. And these healthy impressions will prompt us towards healthy choices.

So whenever we find that maybe if we are doing our chanting regularly, if we are doing our spiritual practises regularly, then this will help us to make better choices. You will find that if you are able to create these good impressions in the early morning, during the day, the unhealthy impressions will not push you so much. When somebody annoys us, rather than getting irritated, rather than getting angry, we will be able to deal with it more calmly.

So bhakti is basically about changing the impressions inside us. So when we, the whole point of, sometimes the word rituals is used negatively. But rituals, what they do is, they are time-tested methods to tap the power of repetition.

Like in forming samskaras, repetition is more important. See in one sense the browser doesn't care whether you are interested in bhagavad-gita.com or not. You just visit bhagavad-gita.com and it will save that.

Okay, you visit bhagavad-gita.com, that will save the browser history and that will come again. So similarly, in one sense our mind is like a machine. And if we just repeat something regularly enough, then that creates an impression.

That's why, now psychologists vary in this, but those who study the brain science, they say that if you want to create a new habit, just try to repeat something for 21 days. The specific numbers may vary, 40 days, 15 days, 21 days. But the principle is, now why should the specific days vary? It depends on how deep the previous impression was.

Say somebody had visited bhagavad-gita.com 10 times. Now they go to bhagavad-gita.com 10 times, bhagavad-gita.com goes back completely. But somebody had visited bhagavad-gita.com 10,000 times.

And then they visit bhagavad-gita.com 10 times, still bollywood.com remains the first one. So sometimes some habits may take more time to change. But the repetition is the key.

So the more we keep repeating doing something, and if we have a structure, if we have, like you have a disciplined structure over here of living, which helps you to repeat regularly. At this point it might seem, oh why do I have to do all this? But this is actually changing your mind for your better. It is creating impressions that will help us in our life's journey wherever we go.

So I'll summarise what I discussed. I discussed three main points. Broadly I was talking about mind management or bhakti for mind management.

The first was I talked about how impressions are formed. So impressions or samskaras are like the browser history. And this becomes our default behaviour.

Default behaviour means it happens just even if we don't want to. And here willpower, it's important, but much much more important is wisdom. Willpower is I will not do this and then we beat up.

Why did I do this? But instead wisdom. Wisdom is, okay, what is exactly happening? My willpower is not going to change my browser history. So the browser history is going to stay the same.

So with respect to the mind as browser, what we can't do is, we can't delete. Deleting is not possible. Formatting is not possible.

But what is possible? Rewrite. So rewriting is possible. But for rewriting, what is the wisdom? Wisdom is we focus on the power of repetition.

Rather than worrying, oh, why did I do like that? And why am I not able to stop doing like that? Just focus on doing the right thing. So we all need to fight. But don't fight against the unhealthy habit.

Fight for building a healthy habit. So once we build a healthy habit, that healthy habit will fight against the unhealthy habit. Just like a bully, instead of fighting the bully ourselves, we fight to build a friendship with another strong person and let that person deal with the bully.

So this is what bhakti and especially the rituals, what we call as rituals in bhakti, they are time-honoured ways of tapping the power of repetition. Thank you very much. Hare Krishna.

So like you said, we should not fight bad habits. But for example, here we don't know. I didn't say we should not fight.

I said we should not focus on fighting with the bad habits. We certainly have to fight. But the primary focus should not be, oh, when will I give this up? Just to give you an example, although we don't allow gadgets, but sometimes we find children who suddenly bring gadgets or if they somehow sneak in or they go home and use gadgets.

So that time then they invariably go to, because of the old sanskars, whatever, they go to bad websites, sometimes one of them will be disappointed. So in that sense, what is a good habit they should focus on in order to remove this bad habit? Well, see there is two kinds of, when Krishna talks about abhyas and vairagya, I mentioned that last time, that vairagya means distance. You remember that we keep a distance from the externals.

So there are two kinds of distancing. One is categorical, the other is chronological. What do I mean by this? Categorical is that this is a category I won't get involved with.

So for example, I will not use devices at all. Like some people who are really into alcohol, they'll say I'll not keep any alcohol in my home. If my home is next to a bar, I'm going to relook it.

If from my office to my home, there is a bar on the way, I'll go by another road. So it's like I will avoid this category entirely. Now sometimes it is possible to do like this.

But it's not always possible. Like if somebody is addicted to food, they cannot avoid all food. So categorical avoidance or categorical distancing is not possible.

So if categorical is not possible, it's chronological. Chronological means what? That we try to make the positive easier and the negative tougher. So in chronology, so if we have a device, say on the device, on the homepage, make something devotional homepage.

Maybe if you like to visit YouTube, then maybe have some channels where there is night darshan or kirtan, something devotional, something sattvic, make that as our website, the channel that we follow. Or on our homepage, you have shortcuts to sites that are good. So basically make the positive thing easier.

So like if there is a, you know, generally, if we consider with respect to food, there is food that is tasty and there is food that is healthy. Now, if these two circles were identical, life would be so easy, isn't it? The food that is good and the food that is good. But just because these circles are not identical, doesn't mean that there is no overlap between them.

Like, say, if as parents we see that, you know, we want our children to eat healthy vegetables, healthy food basically. Now if they find that our child likes some sabji, which is also healthy, then as parents we make more of that sabji, isn't it? So if we can find something which is both healthy and tasty, something which feels good to us and is good to us, is good for us. So for all of us, sometimes we may have to go, now this category requires force and we may have to go to something like sometimes we eat broccoli, sometimes we eat karela.

It is good for us, although it may not be what we like at all. But in general, if we can find something which falls in this category, something which feels good and is good, then it is easier to, with this is, this requires force, but this is easier to go to if you want to give up the, which only feels good. So if every one of us can find out what are the things that are good for me and that feel good for me.

Say for example, if you consider exercise, not all of us may like all kinds of exercise. Some people may like to go to a gym and do weights. Some people it is very tiresome.

But some people say, okay, I just want to go outdoors and I want to run. And I like the feel of fresh air and the faster I run, I feel the fresh air more. So then if that is the exercise we like, we could do that exercise more.

So basically find the intersection of what feels good and what is good. In one sense, what Jeev Rupa Goswami calls in a bhakti context, but you can apply this here also, this is a Uddhipan. Uddhipan is a stimulus that is positive, healthy, spiritual.

Yes, please. So how to deal with the situation they pop up like neurones or what is the combination which promotes dreams? So dreams, it's difficult. Broadly speaking, dreams can fall in many categories.

One is they are just the mind's imagination. This is what Vishwa Prabhupada generally said that we might see a horse and we might see gold and in our dream we might see a golden horse. We might see a mountain and we might see a gold bar and we imagine a golden mountain.

So it's just what we have experienced very differently in real life, they get combined. So that is how most dreams are likely to be. But that doesn't mean all dreams are like that.

Now some dreams, they could be even Krishna speaking to us. Krishna or Guru speaking to us. This is rare, but it's possible.

In our tradition there are so many cases where say Madhavendra Puri is a saint whom Krishna came in a dream. That's also possible for us. Now in between, Baldevidya Bhushan is a prominent acharya in our tradition.

He explains that dreams can be the place where minor karma plays out. That means what does minor karma mean? See we all have some karma from our past. So that karma plays out in our life.

Say we are just going out for a walk and suddenly we slip and fall and where we fall there is a sharp stone and we get injured. Now why did we fall at that particular place? We could have fallen at some other place also. Maybe we were inattentive.

But we fell at that particular place, the injury became much more. So that happens because of our past karma. So in general what happens to us in our waking life is a result of our past karma.

But if there is a minor past karma, their reactions can come to us in our dreams. Like some people have nightmares. And I was in Canada, I met one person.

He said that I am afraid to sleep. I said there are different kinds of fears. Because of nightmares? He says if I sleep I will get all kinds of nightmares.

He doesn't sleep. Yeah, it's difficult. So then we understand that this is the result of some negative karma from the past because of which, see most of us, like most of our daily events is nothing very special positive, nothing very special negative.

It's like that. Like that most of us when we sleep, we may have dreams but most of the dreams are so unremarkable that we don't even remember them most of the times. But sometimes they may be wonderful, sometimes they may be dreadful.

So when dreams come quite often it is negative karma playing out. Now negative karma could be in terms of just karma, the word karma has two different meanings. Karma can mean reactions to actions.

Karma can also mean actions. So like we also do some karma. That's actions.

So now minor karma plays out. That is from sometimes of the past life certain things come up. But another way this can play out is that unfulfilled cravings from the waking state.

So something can be from the previous life, something can be from this life also. So if somebody has strong craving for something in the waking state and they may dream about it in the sleeping state and sometimes that may also lead to some physiological effects. So that's also possible.

If that kind of problem is there, sometimes doing some Narsimha Aarti or something like that before sleeping, having a picture of Narsimha Dev or reciting Narsimha Kavach, that has been found to be quite helpful. Or maybe just if that person can have an earphone and they can sleep with the earphone where Narsimha Aarti is going on continuously on some device or that can be tried out if it helps. I found 2-3 devotees, it helps.

But you can't always, 2-3 people it has helped. But there is no one formula that can work for everyone. We have to see what works.

The mind is quite a tricky thing. Usually my questions are not completely answered. The device thing answers it.

So I said either we have to categorise, like what you are doing over here is categorical blinding. Categorical removal, avoidance. Now when they get a chance they go home or something.

So what is the advice for them? That's what I said that if whatever devices they have, if they can try to keep some positive websites easily available for them. So then even if the urge comes to visit some negative websites, the positive options are easily available. Then it's easier to resist the negative websites.

That experience you should give them here, positive experience in devices. Then they will go for that. I don't have positive experience in devices, but just the positive experience about say, we hear some nice soothing kirtans, we feel good.

And that is available on the, whether to give the positive experience through devices or just to give positive experience. That is something which is more of a practical decision. Isn't that we are facing one problem? Like children have been going to various sites and all that.

And, but then they will not be able to have any clue that they are doing such a thing. Except for the sports, when you see the examination performance or not. So we keep saying, oh you are not studying.

It's not studying. It's like something is acting on them which they are doing to play games. How as teachers could be able to tackle this problem? This is really a menace for us.

Yeah, it's difficult. It's in many ways, I feel that our technology has become too powerful for our morality in today's world. So we can't really blame the children only.

It's like say, if somebody is a food addict, somebody is a sugar addict and that person is told you have to sell sweets and don't eat anything. It's going to be extremely difficult for them. So, I mean the human mind is not designed to be used or not designed to be exposed to the level of temptation that it is being subjected to now.

So I think we need to be more sympathetic rather than simply strict. It's a very complex situation. And we may say our children are doing the same thing.

But if we were children at this age, we might very well have been doing the same things. Okay, it's not charging. Okay, I forgot to charge it.

Anyway. Put the charger in. I'll do that.

So the first thing is that don't be too harsh if that happens. Don't be too harsh with the children. That's understandable.

But within that, if we can create some more, it's almost like we all have a tendency to do something of value. Like we may say that the kid's attention span is going down, they are distracted. Which is true, but on another side if you see our children, the IQ level is increasing with every generation.

It's a significant increase. And that's why if you even see the video game that kids play nowadays, that if we try to play those video games, they are so complex. There are so many things that are happening.

So in some ways we can say that actually real life is not stimulating enough for the children. Rather than saying that they are simply getting distracted, it's like ADHD is a problem. But another level is their minds work so fast that real life is not stimulating enough for them.

So this is, yeah, it's like, yeah, I know one friend, he had an IQ like 173 or something like that. And he went to a college and his parents were not very well to do. He did not get a scholarship.

So he went to a normal college and he was just completely bored in that college. And finally he got permission from his teacher that while the class was going on, he would solve crossword puzzles. And even while solving crossword puzzles, he was more attentive for the class than other students.

And he said because he was solving crossword puzzles, he said I can focus on the class. Others he couldn't because he has that level of brain, he needs that level of engagement. So it's somehow, there are some approaches where we just remove all technology and just give traditional education.

And that can work. But I feel that if the children have already been exposed to technology, are already being exposed to technology, then it becomes difficult. If you can cut off the children completely from technology for the purpose of education, then the natural way of education may work very effectively.

Because it has worked from timeless, from a long long time. But if on one side there is huge amount of stimulation for their senses and mind and other time there is very little stimulation, it does become difficult. So basically see the word dharma, Krishna uses in two senses in the Bhagavad Gita.

One is individual, the other is social. Krishna tells Arjuna, pratyaham itam dharmasambudhacheta. Arjuna asks, what is the right thing for me to do? And Krishna says dharmasamsthapanarthaya, where I come to establish dharma at the level of society.

So I think we need to work at both levels, at an individual level and at an institutional or social level. So at an individual level, whether we can educate them more, facilitate them more, maybe talk with their parents, maybe help them see in their own terms, in terms that they can understand. I saw when I was in UK recently, there was one viral Insta Reel of one Indian boy in UK.

He recited the decimal value of 5 till 51 digits. Maybe 4.5 or 5 or something like that, not 5, maybe 6, 7. And his parents were telling that he has never used any cell phone and that inspired many kids. Really somebody can do that.

So rather than the parents saying don't do this, if you can show them the fruits, that can be helpful. So basically individually facilitate, individually encourage them, but collectively also we need to facilitate them. But it is a difficult challenge.

I don't think there are any easy answers. Any other questions? Yes, please. Sir, when we are studying, while we are studying, many times there are a lot of distractions.

So how can we put all around them? Well, don't worry about a long time. Start with a small time. That means, like I said, the impressions are there in the mind, you can sit down comfortably.

So just plan that for the next five minutes, you are just going to read this book, nothing else. So next three hours I am not going to read anything else. Minus three hours is just too long.

So it will say forget it. Maybe start with 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes. And if you are able to do it for 10 minutes, then appreciate yourself, good job, encourage yourself.

Now let's do it for 10 more minutes. Maybe in between if you want to take a few deep breaths, maybe close your eyes for a few minutes. So basically try to, when something seems very big, break it down into small things.

Like if you have to eat a watermelon, somebody gives you a full watermelon, you can't eat it. But break it down into small, shanai shanai roop paramitra, small, gradually, step by step. So see how much we can do.

And then gradually the capacity will increase. Like when we are weightlifting, we are habituated to lifting 20 kg weight. Suddenly if we go, we can't lift 50 kg weight.

From 20, 21, 22, 25, gradually it increases. So in between both create impressions. So it's just because the second time we did something bad does not necessarily mean that the first time we did good is wasted.

The first time we did good, that also created a good impression. Like sometimes we say that okay I made a resolution, I'll never do it again, something again. But 30 days I stuck to the resolution that I paid.

It's all useless. No, 30 days I stuck to it, that has created an impression and that is helpful. That is going to help us.

But generally speaking, we will go up and down. So don't be too harsh about it. It may not change overnight.

Because at that particular moment, what are we going through? Sometimes if say we have heard a nice class or we are in a good frame of mind, then when somebody irritates us, we may not get agitated, we may not react angrily. But maybe next time we are already exhausted, we are already somewhat upset by something and that person does something, we explode. So there are many factors involved.

But the key thing is just keep repeating. And if it's the same person or similar situation, then in between we need to process. It's like okay, when this happens, what can I do? Maybe I need to talk with that boy first and try to develop a good relationship.

Maybe I need to report to someone else or maybe if I am going in this situation, then let me take someone else with me who will calm me down. So basically it's not just we don't want to keep repressing. I will not do this.

I will not do this. Or I will only do this. If there is some anger or irritation, you also have to go to the root cause and address it.

If this person is behaving in a way that is making me angry, then I need a solution of restraint at that time. I don't want to explode. But then I also want a long term solution where that particular problem doesn't keep recurring again and again.

Thank you so much. It's difficult. See, each one of us has to find out how our mind works.

So sometimes when we are hearing a class, say if you are doing mountain climbing, I don't know, wall climbing, you know this game, where you are holding here and you pull up from here. Then the next pull up point is not there. It may be over there.

Then you find something and pull yourself up over there. Then you pull from here. Then you pull from here.

So like that, when we are reading or hearing a class, we have to find some point of interest. So interest is two ways. One is interest that comes naturally and interest that is cultivated intentionally.

So some things are naturally interesting. Let's say somebody, I am speaking in this class, if I give some example which is really dramatic, some story which is about something, that story may, that's natural interest. But some other things are little more concept, little more analysis, you may have to focus to create interest.

So basically interest works both ways. It is natural and cultivated. So we all need to find out something which is a natural interest to us.

So and sometimes you have to cultivate interest. So basically if we are studying in a class, then maybe before if you are attending a class, maybe before you start a class, we maybe think, okay, why is this class important for me? What do I like about this class? What is interesting for me? And maybe we have some notepad. If it's a particular subject, write down two, three points about why this is interesting or what is interesting for you.

And before you start attending the class, just read those points. Oh, you know, I'm studying history and I found this battle very interesting or this particular thing very interesting. And then when you hear something new, try to connect with that.

Hey, this is similar like this, this is similar like this. So basically we cannot conscious always depend on natural interest. But at the same time, we cannot always be just cultivating interest.

So there has to be both. It's like I can push myself and hold myself, but there has to be something which I can hold on to also. So the existing points which I can hold on to, the bars or the nails or the holes, there have to be something which I can hold on to.

And after that I can pull myself up. So the points you're already there to hold on to, that is like natural interest. And then after that I pull myself up till I find the next point to hold on to.

That is the cultivated interest. So we need both. Is it clear what I'm saying? It's a little complicated.

No, cultivate interest means you're just here. Is there something interesting in this? Like cultivating interest is more like force. Force yourself to be attentive till we find something interesting in it.

But the natural interest is something which just catches our attention. Thank you. Yes.

When we study for two or three hours constantly, but we can't study attentively. See, that's why I said that each one of us has to sit down. Each one of us has to find out how we work the best.

So we have to see how maybe if you're studying for three hours, some people just, okay, I sit down and go on a marathon and just complete this and I get a sense of accomplishment by that. But some people, okay, I studied this, just keep pushing myself. It's like I'm going through the motions, but nothing is going inside.

So maybe I need to stop and work. Maybe I need to have some breaks and work accordingly. So each one of us is different.

And it is important to do some Atmanirksha, self-observation. How do I work the best? Like some students may study together. I study with somebody else and I see the other person studying, that helps me.

Some people may find studying alone is where I get focused most. So observe yourself and see what works best for you. How did you learn more fast? Well, that's too difficult.

It's not that our mood will always be good. But over a period, you remember last time I talked about those diagrams, sine wave, up and down, up and down. You can sit down.

Over a period of time you'll find that the down of the sine wave will not go so much down. So rather than thinking that my mood should never go down, rather try to keep it within boundaries. When it goes down, it will not stay down permanently.

It will rise up. So sometimes we can be consistent, always stay at the same level. But if we can't be consistent, then we can be resilient.

Resilient means I go down, I rise up again. It's like if I have a ball and the ball is thrown down, the ball will go down but it will bounce back. If I take a glass paperweight and throw it down, it will go down, it will crack apart.

So we can't stay up like an object over here. A ball can fall down, a glass weight can fall down. So like that it's very difficult for us to stay consistent.

We'll all go down. But we can try to be resilient. Okay, that time I didn't feel that good but let me pick myself up now.

Let me move up now. This is one example, like Radhakant Guruji, the director says, you won't attend a class but you will be half an hour or so, you will be in such a concentration that you will be able to do this everything. You will be sitting for two hours class and 15 minutes you will be able to do it.

So that is again a question of concentration. Yeah, that's a good example. Interesting.

Sometimes the disturbance comes from external conditions but we all have internal conditionings. No, it is like you can't study properly when there is no problem. Yeah, all have to find out some ways.

Maybe then one thing which is being increasingly tried out in schools and even if it is read aloud. Normally we are recommended to read in the mind so that you can read faster. And that is true.

But sometimes you are not able to focus, just read aloud. If you are not going to disturb anyone else, reading aloud, it may be slow but at least we are reading. We will find that you are able to absorb yourself.

I am not reading loudly but I can hear you. I am saying that read aloud is an example. You will find out something.

Each one of us has to be creative. Maybe say not able to focus, maybe I will read for two minutes, I close my eyes and I will try to recollect one point that I read. So you have to see that, be creative.

What works for you? So if you say writing down, okay writing down, what can I write down? So maybe I will write down an important point, write down a striking point or write down, maybe I read something and just try to, like I said what you said about developing interest, we have to create some challenge for ourselves. So when we do that, once you start going in this direction, you will find so many ideas will come. Maybe you read something and think okay if I have to draw a diagram explaining it, how will I do it? I don't spend two hours in thinking of a diagram.

Just what comes in the mind immediately. Sometimes it may be good, sometimes it may not be good. Just try to be a little creative.

My question is that sometimes our teachers become angry on us and we try to say sorry to them but our just mind did not allow us to do that and saying sorry is a good thing but we become scared that time, why? We become scared of the teachers and don't say sorry because of that. Whenever we think that we have to say sorry to the teachers and our mind did not allow us to do that, why should we become scared that time? Okay see, sit down comfortably. It's like our mind, there is a part of it which you can control, part of it which we can't control.

It's like in some ways the mind is like the body. Like say some people when the temperature drops it becomes cold. Some people a little drop in temperature they immediately want some sweater or something.

Some others it drops a lot of temperature, still they are quite okay. So different bodies are made differently. So like that different minds are made differently.

So in some minds fear may come to a little degree. Some minds fear may come to a large degree. So each one of us, this is the way my mind works.

We just observe it, we understand it and maybe it happens at that time and we can't say sorry. At least with our actions, with our expression whatever way we can show that we are not just being arrogant, show that we are not just being disrespectful or negligent and later on we can explain. My mind just goes blank at such times.

I can't think of anything. I did not not mean to say sorry, just couldn't think about it. So maybe at that time if we can't say sorry, we can just write that down and offer that as apology and later on we can do it.

See the idea is that I am a writer and I am a speaker. Now I know some of my friends who are very good writers but they are not very good speakers. So they say that I can think better by writing than by speaking.

So quite often if they have to do interviews, they say that you ask me the questions and I will type the answers. Who will type the answers? It takes so much time. But they feel that if I type, I can.

So they don't like to do oral interviews. They say we will do written interviews. Some others say, interview? Who are they trying to type anything? You just send it written to me.

You just speak it. So each of us has to work the way our mind works. Work with our mind basically.

Same meaning unreasonable. No we are saying unreasonable means so many unreasonable things happen or there are small things but our mind is getting unreasonably irritated over them. There are small things but our mind is making it big.

Like that? Okay. So it's a sincere question. So see the thing is, it's like if you probably know about a computer, if you are on a phone, say we are having a phone and sometimes some window just opens.

And then sometimes some app is there and it has advertisement with it. And sometimes some pop-up comes. There doesn't seem to be any minimise button only.

Isn't it like the minimise button is of the same colour as the background. You can't even see the minimise button. So sometimes our mind is like that and some pop-ups come.

They become so big they fill the full might. And you just can't find any way to minimise it. So what do you do at that time? If you can't find any way to minimise it, you just shift to some other app.

Put the app in the background and then you maximise that app. So like that sometimes we can't make a thing just bigger, big in the mind small. But we can find something big.

This small thing is annoying me so much. But is there something more important for me? Maybe find out something which you like to do and try to bring that into your mind. So don't try to get this out of your mind.

Try to get something. If you maximise something else, this will automatically get minimised. So if you focus on minimising it, it doesn't work.

So find out something which you can maximise. Maybe if you like to draw, then just start drawing something. You like to write something.

Even if it's a scribble, doodle, start doing something which you like to do. Maybe like to sing, like to recite some shlokas, have something in the mind, start with something and then gradually that will get maximised. So we can't always minimise, but we can always have the option to maximise something else.

Thank you. OK. Why do you feel like not attending a class? Well, there are two reasons.

One is that our mind likes to be lazy. It always chooses the path of least resistance. So because of the laziness, that's one thing.

So it's like our mind is sometimes lazy. So it needs to be pushed. But Krishna also says in the Gita that there are many things, good things, which taste like poison in the beginning.

They don't feel very good in the beginning, but they start feeling good eventually. So that's the nature of the way things are. That sometimes we have to push through the poison.

We push through, then the nectar, then the positive starts coming. So like say if you wake up in the morning, the first thing is if the alarm rings, turn it off. That's our tendency.

Now very few people as soon as the alarm comes, jump out of the bed happily. It doesn't work like that. Very few people.

But if you wake up, maybe you freshen up, take a bath, then gradually you start feeling better, get a head start in the morning when we start our day. That's positive. So know that we don't feel like doing it initially, but that feeling will not be there constantly.

It's like mysterious. If you have to lift up a heavy weight, oh this is 15 kg, 20 kg, how will I lift it? It's like you try lifting it, the more you lift it, you find the weight decreases. So it's like that.

It's like poison in the beginning, but gradually it will become like nectar. So what seems, what the mind says, I don't want to do this, just push yourself a little bit, mind will start licking it. Thank you.

We feel that we cannot do this. We feel discouraged. How can we stop? Yeah, if you feel discouraged, then two things.

One is either we have to find someone who will encourage us or we have to find something from our past that will encourage us. Okay, I feel I can't do this. But then last time I was trying that I also felt I couldn't do it.

But I was able to do it. So either we find something from our past that encourages us or we have some friend, some teacher, some guide who encourages us. So discouragement is there.

There has to be encouragement either externally or internally. Thank you. Good questions.

Can we stop now? The more we go from technology, the more it attracts. Yes, that is true. But the more we go towards technology also, the more it attracts.

That's how addiction also happens. So it's like sometimes the more technology used, the more the samskaras are created and the more it can infatuate us. So you can sit down.

So there is no easy solution to it. It is that if our focus is on going away from technology, then we will keep remembering technology. But if our focus is not so much on going away from technology, it is more on going towards something.

Then that creates its attraction. Like say, you know, when the satellites are launched. India had the Chandrayaan recently.

So now if the earth's gravity field is there, the satellite has to go out of the earth's gravity field. That requires a lot of effort. But once it has gone out of the earth's gravity field, then it's in space.

It does not require that much effort. It doesn't require much effort at all. This keeps moving.

Some fuel is required. But then eventually if it enters into the moon's gravity field, then it will just get pulled by that gravity field. Isn't it? So like that we can say technology has a gravity field.

And to come out of the gravity field of technology requires effort. And the further we go up, it seems requires more and more effort. But if our focus is also in going into the gravity field of something.

Say, for example, if you decide, OK, I will go out in the nature for a walk. And then you look at how peaceful and vast the sky is, what kind of birds are there, what kind of flowers are there, what kind of fruits are there, what kind of trees are there. And then slowly we develop attraction for that.

Then we get into the gravity pull of that. And when we get into the gravity pull of that, then like once if somebody comes in the moon's gravity pull, then the earth's gravity pull is no longer effective. So like that, don't focus on what we are going away from.

Focus on what we are going towards. So if you have something positive to go towards, we cannot have our focus on avoiding technology. If I am not having technology, what am I doing with my time? We plan something, OK, I will do some exercise, I will do some book reading, I will spend some time with my, I would make good friendships with the friends around me.

There is so much to do in real life. When we are doing that, then we can come out of the gravity pull. So thank you very much.

Very wonderful questions. Yeah, I'd prefer to go to Delhi now. Yeah, there is a class tomorrow early morning there.

I'll take along the way. Thank you. So maybe while going along, we can talk.

OK, so while Guruji is going to the class, let's thank Guruji for this precious time and this wonderful session. Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare, Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Thank you so much.