Does emotional pain indicate something wrong that needs fixing or should it just be tolerated
He says physical pain is an indicator that something is wrong, which needs to be fixed. Similarly, emotional pain can also be an indicator of something being wrong. So, when do we fix it? Or when do we just tolerate it, or when do we move out of it? Broadly speaking all of us can benefit by increasing our tolerance level That means say right now if you are hearing this talk If suddenly some noise starts coming over here Now that noise will distract us But if we tolerate that noise and focus That's a strength because life will distract us in so many ways So in general an increased tolerance level is always beneficial But that doesn't mean tolerance is alone the solution to all problems Tolerance is for a purpose Like say right now the purpose would be that you want to be a part of this talk Understand it Your purpose is to focus on the talk so you tolerate the distraction So we all need to have some purpose in our life And tolerance means to keep small things small So that we can focus on the big things But if tolerance, if we are obstructed in doing the big thing itself If the pain becomes so much that we can't do the big thing Then tolerance is counterproductive Say suppose you are going in a metro train Now in India because the population is so high The metro bogie is for 50 people and there are 300 people in that bogie And they are squeezed together Suppose you are standing and some people are like bullies So you are standing and this person comes next to you and starts pushing you And then suppose we get angry and say how dare you push me I will push you You think you are so strong, I am also strong And they push us and we push us and they push us and we push us And we get so caught in pushing that our station comes and goes And we are still pushing Now that could be foolish Ok, you think you are a big boss, ok no problem You want more space? It is a short journey, I will tolerate it So there keep the small things small This person wants to show off himself, ok But suppose that person starts pushing us out of the train itself Then we can tolerate Because that is interfering with our purpose of getting to the destination So it is our purpose that gives us perspective And then when to tolerate, when not to tolerate So that person starts pushing us out of the train Then tolerance is foolish in that Then we have two options Broadly it is tolerate, mitigate or immigrate So mitigate means you know maybe raise an alarm And maybe other passengers come along and they say don't do this, stop We do something to counter it But if that person has got several other people in their own group Then immigrate means you might just go to another boogie So all three approaches are valid And all three approaches can be invalid Depending on what is our purpose So if you are tolerating and you are simply feeling helpless And we are not even pursuing any purpose Then we will become resentful If you are mitigating, but you are mitigating simply for the sake of fighting You did this, I will do this And our purpose is lost, that is also very bad If you are immigrating, then we are just running away from one problem to another problem to another problem That is also bad But if you are purposeful This is the purpose of my life And for this big thing, this is inconvenient, but it is tolerable For this big thing, then I will tolerate it But for my big thing, this is coming in the way Then I have to counter it And mitigate it Or if mitigating it is taking too much trouble Then I have better things to do in my life than fighting this war Than fighting this battle Then I will move on some balance That is not out of fear But that is because of focus on our purpose So then either tolerate, mitigate or immigrate All three are valid options Depending on what helps us further the important purposes of our life Okay Does this answer your question?