​How can we avoid pride while using our talents in Krishna’s service?

Answer Podcast

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
sometimes when people appreciate us our ego makes us proud and then we do service our ego will push us to do service it will be difficult to unhear the dictations of ego and still serve genuinely for Krishna so how to be humble in this situation yeah it’s possible that sometimes while doing services we may be appreciated for doing the services and then we may feel that may make me proud if I do some service if I do it well I get praised I will become proud actually speaking to think that I will become proud is itself pride because I am assuming I am not proud right now so so actually it’s not that you know we will become proud we always have pride we always have pride but most of the time we don’t have reason to express that pride so I already think I am a great person but I don’t have any evidence to show that I am great so when I do something when I do something special then I get that evidence so the pride is always there inside but it is not expressed at that time so when we do something it is not that we become proud it is rather the pride that is hidden that becomes expressed so it’s not that by doing service we will become proud or not neither it is not necessary that by doing service we will become proud nor is it necessary that by not doing good service we will be able to avoid pride that pride is already there and quite often if we are capable of doing something nicely and if we don’t do it then whoever else does it the pride that is there within us that comes off in an ugly way as envy if somebody if I can sing nicely but I don’t sing and somebody else sings nicely yes, just see how proud they are how proud he is how proud she is so what has happened that our pride it is not expressed directly but it is expressed in a negative way as envy that’s why not doing service well when we have the capacity to do it well that is not the cure for pride the cure for pride is not suppression of talent the cure for pride is purification of intent purification of intent means why am I doing this service initially I may do that service because I like to be praised well I sing nicely and then I think how many people will come and appreciate me for my singing but that’s ok if we start our service initially we all need some appreciation we all need some some encouragement so once there was a devotee who was a very good brudanga player and he was playing brudanga and Prabhupada came at that temple and Prabhupada took darshan and he was going out and he said your kirtan Prabhupada told him tapped him on his head and said your kirtan is very nice and then he thought this is probably the only opportunity I will get from a spiritual master so he said Prabhupada sometimes I feel proud and Prabhupada just tapped him on the head what’s wrong with that what’s wrong with that now we may say pride is you know it’s a demoniac quality how can Prabhupada say what’s wrong with that so actually the point is we all have some pride within us and that pride needs some expression so we want some respect we want some recognition and if we don’t get it in devotee circle we will seek it in non devotee circle and when we seek that recognition, respect and we seek the fulfillment of pride in non devotee circle then for getting that we will have to do non devotional things whereas if we seek respect or recognition we try to fulfill that longing for pride within devotee circle that at least will make us do the right thing so if I fast on Ekadashi then I fast nirjala on Ekadashi I say you are such an austere devotee I feel good you know so actually I am fasting Jagannath Baldev Subhadra Mayyaki so especially now I am fasting but but my ego is feasting I am thinking I am so good especially now what if I do if I fast on Ekadashi and then I go to the go to the Prasadamon and see who all is eating what all self gratifiers I am self controlled then that is really ego but if we should not just parade what we are doing to everyone but if we are appreciated yes this devotee is so austere and if that makes us do the fasting at least we are doing fasting if I go to non devotee circle and I want to be appreciated they will say I drink 5 bottles of beer I drink 10 bottles and we will do that for getting appreciation just giving an extreme example but the point is that pride can also be used in devotional service that sometimes the desire for honor the desire for respect that makes us act respectively now the problem comes when that is the only motive for respectable action so I fast when everybody is seeing but as soon as I am privately in my room I eat so I am not really doing it for purification I am doing it simply for a show then it becomes a problem but generally if we are practicing sadhana bhakti we are hearing the philosophy then there is both we want to please Krishna, we want to become purified and we also want some respect from others so now what happens if we keep practicing bhakti sincerely over a period of time we will notice that actually whatever pleasure I get when I am praised by others that pleasure is temporary but if I absorb myself in Krishna that pleasure lasts much more and then that pleasure when it lasts much more then I realize why am I bothering about this so when I initially started giving classes maybe 10-15 years ago so at that time like everyone else I was very self-conscious so after every class I would wonder who is going to come and appreciate my class who is not going to appreciate my class so what would happen so after once I gave a class I thought I had prepared the class very nicely I thought this was probably the best class I have given in my life and after that class not one person came and appreciated and then I was feeling so dissatisfied at that time and then it suddenly struck me that actually when I was speaking the class I was happy but after the class over I am miserable so what that means is speaking about Krishna is joyful but when I speak about Krishna with the expectation that I will be praised for that and I don’t get the praise I become dissatisfied so comparatively speaking even if I am praised for doing some service, how long is that praise going to last, how much satisfaction I am going to get from that but if I become absorbed in the service of Krishna that absorption itself will give satisfaction but this realization will not come if we don’t do the service at all if we do the service what happens is the service is what connects us with Krishna so that connection with Krishna will gradually give us taste of a higher happiness than the pleasure that comes from praise than the pleasure of pride and only when we experience a happiness higher than the pleasure promised by pride then we will be able to give up the pleasure promised by pride that’s why we need to serve Krishna whatever happens and while serving Krishna we try to purify our intent, that means if I am doing any service, I don’t constantly think who is going to notice my service, who is going to praise me for my service, yes we do need some human appreciation, that’s a normal need but we don’t make that the sole purpose of doing our service and by that gradually as our intent becomes purified we will become enthusiastic in service of Krishna and that will, that higher taste coming from absorption in Krishna will truly remove pride so if we find that while doing service also we are getting repeatedly dissatisfied, we are expecting to be praised and we are not getting praised then we can do a force correction, that means maybe I am doing this service too much for external motives so quite often if we are praised we share the credit with others, we tell others also this devotee also helped me, this devotee guided me we share, we don’t take the credit to ourselves, so while doing service we can use various means to protect ourselves from being called that is give the credit to others remember that sometimes we do our service very nicely but sometimes you know even if we are good at a particular field we are not able to do the service nicely so we all know that means actually I understand I am not the only doer I am not the only doer so we understand that we can become more humble so it is not that by not doing service we will ever become humble it is by doing service gradually we will get a taste higher than pride and that’s how we will develop humility and if while doing service we are becoming obnoxious, we are becoming very proud like say some devotee sings very nicely and whoever is singing in a temple situation there are different devotees who sing, not everybody is a good singer but everybody gets a point to sing some devotee is a very good singer and that devotee starts singing everybody else is faulty, so I only will sing no one else will sing and then senior devotees will tell this is not proper this is becoming too much sometimes some senior devotees specifically tell us this service is making you too proud better you avoid this service then that is ok, then we might stop that service or do that service in a less visible way but in general as a matter of principle giving up service is not a solution for pride it is service alone that is the solution to pride, that is the cure for pride