How can we process criticism without feeling hurt?

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
So, should we be assessing the criticism that we get from others in terms of it is going to help me to become a better devotee or become more submissive or determined? And, should we not take in everything directly? To some extent, this is a matter of disposition and to some extent, it is a matter of decision. Some people are more emotional than rational. So, they tend to be more sensitive.
And, even if we tell them, don’t take criticism so personally. What do you mean? You are criticizing me. How can I not take it personally? So, then people around them have to recognize that they are sensitive.
And then, often when they have to be given feedback, they have to be given very very carefully. So, to some extent, for some people, the emotional side is much much stronger than the rational side. And then, whatever negative feedback they get, that will have a strong emotional effect on them.
When some people, the rational aspect is stronger and they can objectively evaluate. So, we all need to develop that rational side. Even if we are more emotional, we need to develop the rational side.
Of course, sometimes those people are too rational, they may also have to develop the emotional side. Because otherwise, they are just too calculated. They don’t connect at an emotional level with anyone.
So, actually, it is very important to learn to process our emotions. If you don’t do that, then our emotions will toss us around here and there. It’s like if you are in the ocean.
In the ocean, sometimes there might be a current which is taking our boat in the direction which we want to go to. So, it’s important to catch that current. Then, we won’t have to put in that much effort to go towards the destination.
So, similarly, for our overall journey of life, we need to have a positive emotion towards the destination that we want to go to. Say, we want to develop devotion for Krishna. So, we have some general attraction towards Krishna.
That is the positive emotional current that will keep us going towards Krishna. But even when there is a current in the ocean that is moving in a particular direction, still there are so many other waves which keep coming in different directions. And so, even if we like a particular thing, still our emotions will be unpredictable and they will come like waves.
So, if we take in everything, then it is like the wave that is so fragile, so small, or so weak, so unsteady, that it just gets tossed by any and every wave that comes along. So, now, our reason, our rationality has to be like the engine. The engine makes sure that even if the wave is coming this way, you use the steering wheel, and basically, I would say, not just the engine, the mechanical structure that operates the boat, steering wheel, engine, everything combined together, that is what has to be like our intelligence.
And even if the wave comes, the wave pushes, then again, we pull back. Jiva Goswami says in the Sandarbhas, that for the pure devotees, for the Siddhas, it is their preeti for Krishna that will keep them in their bhakti. Because they love Krishna, they naturally practice bhakti.
But for us sadhakas, it is our buddhi that will keep us in bhakti. We may have some preeti, we may have some affection for Krishna, but that affection is not steady. So, we need our intelligence.
that is why hearing scripture regularly, reading scripture regularly, helps us to nourish our intelligence. And that nourished intelligence becomes like the steering mechanism of the boat. Even if it goes off track because of some waves, it will come back.
So, we do need to assimilate, we need to evaluate. Evaluation is needed before assimilation of the events. If we take them in directly, internalize them, that may hurt us too much.
But if we evaluate them using our intelligence, yes, this person spoke like this, but this can help me to become more humble. Then, that will be more easier to process it and move on in our life.