How to understand Krishna’s blessings – Mukunda Mala Stotra 1 – BULL acronym

[Talk at Atlanta, USA]

Video:

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
Hare Krishna So it’s wonderful to be here amongst all of you today and I’ll speak on the first verse of the Mukunda Mala Stotra and I’ll speak this, the essential message of the verse using an acronym. So the first verse is a prayer which invokes the mood of the stotra. Mukunda Mala Stotra is a composition by Shri Akula Shekhar.
He is one of the Alwars, one of the greatest saints in the bhakti tradition in South India, the Shri Vaishnav tradition and we will try to understand through this verse how God acts in our life. How God’s blessings come in our life. So, I’ll talk about, use the word bull.
The word animal, bull is considered a very powerful animal, most powerful amongst domestic animals. And that’s why Purushaya Rishabha. Rishabha is bull amongst men.
Arjuna is glorified as Purushaya Rishabha. So B-U-L-L, so blessings are understood by linking with the liberator. So what is a blessing? How can we understand Lord’s blessings? These are the four points, these are the four lines of this verse that I’ll talk.
So the verse is Shri Vallabheti Vardeti Daya Pareti Bhakta Priyeti Bhavalundana Kovideti Na Bheti Na Seshay Niti Jagannivasit Aalapinam Tat Dinam Gurumamukunda So, Shri Vallabheti Vardeti Daya Pareti This is describing the glories of the Lord. It says, He is the Lord of the Goddess of Fortune. Shri Vallabheti Normally everybody loves fortune.
But the Goddess of Fortune loves the Lord. Fortune is fickle and it comes and goes. But she stays always with the Lord.
She loves the Lord. Shri Vallabheti And He doesn’t keep His fortune with Himself. He gives the fortune profusely to others.
Vardeti He can bless us. But His blessings are not ordinary. They are transcendental.
Daya Pareti Daya is there. There is mercy, compassion. Blessings are there.
But Pareti Para means it is beyond. Transcend means that which goes beyond ordinary. So, His blessings are not ordinary.
They are extraordinary. Now, what do we mean by extraordinary blessings? The first line talks about blessings. The Lord is the blesser.
But how does He bless? What makes His blessings? Daya Pareti Extraordinary Because Bhavalantana Kovideti Shri Vallabheti Vardeti Daya Pareti Bhakta Priyeti Bhavalantana Kovideti Bhakta Priyeti He loves His devotees. The devotees love Him. And He loves the devotees.
And therefore, what does He do? Bhavalantana Kovideti Kovida is expert. Bhava is material existence. Luntana Luntana is to plunder.
To destroy. So, sometimes a negative word is used to describe something which is very positive. It’s like we might say this happens with words also that you have heard the word wicked? Among teenagers, the word wicked is used in a positive sense.
That was a wicked match. You heard that? So, there is some word which I was in London and I had gone to Leicester actually and I had a college programme and there were very good question answers after that. The organiser was very happy after the question answers.
And he said that actually with a big smile he came to me and said you killed it. What? Who did I kill? I was alone. And then he was having such a bright smile on his face.
He was telling I am a murderer. With a smile on his face. So then, afterward I understood that kill is a term drawn from hunting.
Somebody shoots very well and kills. So, you killed it is well done. Now killing is considered very negative.
But you killed it is considered a positive thing. Similarly, Luntan is plundering. So, but Bhavan Luntana Kovidevti that the lord is expert in plundering the material existence of his devotees.
What does it mean? That means that he because he loves us he wants us to be with him. And whatever keeps us attached to the world whatever keeps us in this world he is expert at removing all those attachments. So, now that’s what Gaya Pareti.
His blessing is ordinary blessing would be that we give, see all that we have in the world we can offer him is material. The only non-material thing that we can offer him is our heart. And otherwise we have our wealth, we have our time, we have our energy, we have our contacts.
There are many ways in which we can offer our heart’s devotion to him. But basically we offer him something material essentially. It’s our heart we want to offer but we express that to something material.
And he can also do something material. But he doesn’t reciprocate on him that love. We offer him the temporary and he gives us something eternal.
We offer him the temporary things of this world and he gives us the eternal thing, eternal love for him. But to give the eternal he has to make space in our heart. If our heart is filled with the temporary, then we cannot get the eternal.
Therefore bhavalanta naka videti he is expert at plundering the material existence of those who are devoted to him. So blessings are understood. The second part, the blessings have to be understood.
Some blessings are easy to understand. We want something and we get it. That’s a blessing.
We pray to God and we get it. But sometimes he blesses in a way that is not so easy to understand. And natheti naga shayaneti jaganniva setya that he is the eternal shelter of everyone.
He is the nath, he is the lord, he is the parent of everyone. natheti naga shayaneti Now naga shayaneti is at one level a describer of his eternal pose. He reclines among the shesh.
But it also indicates now a snake is considerably dangerous and nobody will if, what to speak of reclining on a snake. If we are reclining on our bed and there is a snake below, we will jump off. So, that which is dangerous, that which will make us flee away, the lord comfortably reclines on it.
So everything that is dangerous for us, none of that is dangerous for him. So he is our eternal master. naga shayaneti Whatever causes us danger, none of it causes him danger.
He is safe, he is transcendental and he can make us safe and transcendental. jaganniva setya Why does he jaganniva setya, the shesh, the whole world resides within him. That means everything in this world is ultimately in his control.
It exists within him and therefore there is no danger for us because of anything in this world. So basically there is no danger for him and if we link with him. So, the whole point is that we are already linked with him because he is already our lord.
We are present in the universe and the universe is present within him. So we are already linked with him. But we need to realise that link.
By linking with whom? aala pinam pratim kurma mukunda mukunda the creator. Where? We link with him by chanting his names aala pinam recite his names pratidinam every day. Recite his names.
Now the reciting of the names is basically to trigger our remembrance. Among all living beings, humans have the power of speech and language and especially in terms of communicating through various languages and through writing. And it is through writing and language that scriptural knowledge is also given to us.
So, the power of articulation is very great. It is very distinctive. And this power if used spiritually can take us toward liberation.
The chanting is not just the uttering of mantras. It is using the power of, the distinctive power of articulation that we all have to link with the divine, to offer up the devotion to the lord. So, there is the summary of the words broadly.
We will talk about this now. The blessings are understood by linking with the liberator. Normally, different people have different conceptions of god.
If at all, people have any conception. Some people, they just don’t care whether god exists or not. I was giving a seminar in Canada.
So, they wanted me to speak on something scientific. So, does god exist? They asked me to speak. Then after that I talked with them and then one of the organisers said, actually, they changed the title of the seminar.
They said, if god exists, so what? They had, how does it matter? I was at a interfaith panel discussion in Australia and the topic of that discussion was why hasn’t god died till now? What that meant was that, Frederick Nietzsche was a famous German philosopher and he said god is dead. Now, when he said that, what he meant was that, not that god, of course, if he exists he is eternal. He can’t die.
But the basis for society to believe in god that has died. The idea of god has died. He thought that because of the advancement of science, belief in god has become untenable.
So, many sociologists have predicted from the middle of the 19th century that as science progresses, religion will decline and religion will die. But there has been a remarkable resurgence in religion all over the world. America is one of the world’s most religious countries, especially among the developed, first world countries.
The Middle East is religious. India is religious. So, many of the parts of the world are religious.
So, why is god not died till now? What is the reason for the remarkable staying power of religion? So, the point I was making is different people have different conceptions of god. And, depending on our conception, we perceive what is a blessing and what is not a blessing. So, we all, at some time in our life, feel the need for help beyond our god.
We all, whatever powers we have, we have talents, we have resources, we have discipline, we all use that to achieve whatever is important for us. But even when we are trying to do that, at some time or the other, we understand that the results don’t depend on me alone. And there are so many factors beyond me that shape the results.
And therefore, we start seeking whatever is out there. Recently, the cricket world cup was going on. I was in Australia at that time.
And one of my friends, he had gone to London for the world cup. And the India-Pakistan match was there at that time. And before that, there were, many matches were wiped out because of raids.
So, he had bought a ticket for the India-Pakistan match. And that one ticket was one thousand pounds. One thousand pounds is about one lakh.
One lakh in INR for one match. And he called me and he said, you know, I don’t believe in god. But still, you pray to god that that match doesn’t get cancelled.
Otherwise, I’d lose one lakh rupees. So, now, BCCI has a policy that if there is no, not a single ball hold, then they will refund. But, they will refund to the person who has bought the ticket at the rate that the ticket is holding.
But he had bought the ticket in black. So, he would hardly get punched. So, even if you are interested in sports, we recognise that there are so many factors beyond our control.
And there may be something unknown which controls us. And that’s how we turn towards god. Can you think of it? And when we pray for something and we get it, that’s what we normally consider as a blessing.
Say, if somebody is sick and the doctor says, whether we can cure it or not, then you pray to god. And then if the disease is cured, then god is blessed. So, normally, this is our normal understanding of blessings.
That we form a relationship with god and the terms of the relationship are that my intelligence and your power. I have this problem. I know what is the solution to this problem.
But I just can’t do it. So, you use your power and you do the solution. So, when we pray to god, often this is the way we approach it.
And that’s how sometimes even atheists, they like to serve god. But they like to serve god only in one role. As advisors.
They will say, if god had existed, he should not have made it like this. He should have made this like this. So, their terms of the relationship is, I know better than god.
And because things are not done the way I think they should be done, therefore, god doesn’t exist or god is not good. Whichever way. So, now this is… Of course, we do have intelligence and we are meant to use our intelligence.
But, humility allows us to recognise that we don’t know everything about reality. And if we don’t know everything about reality, that means that the same thing that may seem at one level very bad for us. But that might be actually good for us.
Say, if you are walking along the road and suddenly you see a big hefty man charging towards us with hands up and yelling loudly. What do I do to provoke this person? And he charges towards us and he is charging so fast. We don’t know what to do.
And he charges right towards us and goes by us and bang! We hear something. And we look back and see there was a thief, deadly weapon charging towards us. And this person was warning us.
But they were speaking a different language and we thought the person was attacking us. Whereas, his intention was actually to protect us. So, with our limited knowledge, sometimes we see some danger coming towards us in our life.
But, who knows, maybe what seems dangerous to us is actually protecting us from some other danger. So, blessings can sometimes be understood in terms of the fulfilment of what we seek. But sometimes, blessings can come in an entirely opposite way.
So, that’s why blessings need to be understood. Sometimes, the Lord takes away that which is dear to us. The idea here is that our consciousness is meant to evolve.
If you could say that small babies, if you want to say positively, they are just unaware of anything except themselves. A newborn baby doesn’t even understand that this is my mother. This is something soft and I get something nice from it.
But, they don’t have any awareness of anything except themselves. As they grow, the baby starts getting aware that this is my mother, this is another person. So, a baby basically may cry anytime, maybe at midnight.
Now, if an adult, say maybe a 10-year-old, 12-year-old boy starts crying at night, what is this? You consider it inappropriate, isn’t it? Because they have greater awareness. Don’t cry loudly, don’t make a lot of noise. So, what happens? That as we grow older, our consciousness expands so that we become more aware of the things and the people around us.
And this expansion of consciousness is meant to grow, grow, grow, till we ultimately become aware of God. Say, in the past, maybe over 100-200 years ago, we were aware only that this earth is meant for our enjoyment. So, let’s industrialise.
Let’s deforest. But now we become more aware. Actually, this earth has its own harmony, its own balance and we can’t disrupt it.
That’s why there is an increasing rise in environmental consciousness. So, what is happening? To some extent, the consciousness expands. So, just as our consciousness expands naturally as we grow biologically, similarly, our consciousness is meant to expand as we grow spiritually.
And ultimately, we are meant to become conscious of Krishna. So, for a child who is very attached to oneself, as the child grows up, he becomes attached to the mother. Attached to the mother means if the child does something, he looks at the mother and the mother frowns.
I should not do this. And the mother smiles. So, the child wants to please the mother.
So, what has happened? The consciousness has expanded. Similarly, for us, our consciousness is to expand. Now, expansion of consciousness, especially to understand God and how God works, that is not easy.
It’s just like if there is a small baby, maybe 2-3 years old, and you tell the baby, clean your room. Tell the child, clean your room. Now, for us, cleaning the room is a very simple thing.
Okay, put this here, put this here, put this here. But, if you think about it, cleaning your room is actually an abstract conception, which has many concrete things. Isn’t it? So, maybe the way you clean the kitchen, that means you put this here, put that there.
The way you clean your library might be very different. Clean the kitchen means maybe you use a waterfall. But if you decide to use water in the library, it’s going to be terrible.
So, the point I am making here is that what we consider simple. Clean your room. It actually contains many different concrete actions in different situations.
So, cleaning is a, in one sense, of course it’s a tangible action, but cleaning your room, it’s like an abstract conception. And it can contain different things. So, if a child has to be told, clean your room.
The child can’t process it. And then, mother tells the child, you see the toy over there? Go and pick it up. The child goes and picks it up.
And looks at the mother. Now, you take it and put it on that rack. Oh, not there.
Put it next to another toy. Don’t put it fallen down. Does it look good now? Now, you take the shoes and put it on the shoe rack.
Now, you take that cloth. Take that pillow and put it on that side of the bed. So, what is happening is that that concept of cleaning has to be explained in terms of concrete actions.
And then the child understands. So, what is very straightforward for the mother may not be straightforward for the child. And there has to be a communication.
So now, similarly for us, the way God acts and the way we act, there are two different levels. And now, at one level, Krishna explains through scripture. But we also need to study the scripture to understand it.
So, Krishna’s blessings come in the form that he wants our consciousness to expand. And at one level, instead of being self-centred, I was studying a class in New Zealand. And I often speak about how in the western world, the social foundations are coming.
How the divorce rate is going up. So then one devotee told me, you can’t speak this over here. I said, why? He said, because divorce rates are not going down over here.
Sorry, divorce rates are not going up over here. Really? How come? Marriage rates are going down. So now, at one level, if somebody is self-obsessed, is doing whatever they want, then if they at least become responsible, committed enough to form a steady relationship with someone, instead of just believing in or having casual indulgences, then that requires an expansion of consciousness.
It requires a significant amount of coming out of self-obsession to sustain a relationship. And then if parents have a child, then they have to further expand their consciousness. So each of these is an expansion of consciousness.
But, sometimes, our consciousness expands up to a particular point and stops at that. Now, Krishna wants our consciousness to keep expanding. So, if the consciousness stops at a particular point, then it is an attachment.
Wherever the consciousness stops and gets blocked over there, that’s an attachment. There’s a difference between attachment and commitment. Commitment is the investment of emotion, the investment of consciousness.
Attachment is the imprisonment of consciousness. It is the imprisonment of emotion. When we are invested in someone, we are concerned about them.
But, we are not imprisoned by that. You know what? We have relationships and every relationship is important for us. But we see that ultimately, whatever we are doing for anyone in the relationship, or whatever anyone is doing for us, it is not just that person doing to us, it is Krishna doing to that person to us.
For example, one of the most intimate and selfless acts of love is a mother breastfeeding her child. Who wants it? Now, that certainly requires a deep amount of intimacy. At the same time, when the child is born, it’s not that the mother does anything special to produce milk in her breast.
The same God who sent a child through the womb into the world, also arranged for milk in the mother’s breast. So, the idea here is that it is the mother’s love, but it is not only the mother’s love. It is God’s love coming through the mother’s love.
So, we need to, of course, recognise the medium, the instrument through which the love is coming, but we also need to recognise the source behind that. So, if we just get caught in the instrument, then it is an attachment. But if we see the instrument, we see the channel, and then we see the source.
Then, that attachment, that won’t be an attachment, it’s a commitment, but we move forward also towards Krishna. So, for each one of us, when I’m talking about this, I’m explaining all this as bhava nantana ko bhi deti. The Lord is exploding, plundering our material existence.
That means that wherever our consciousness gets locked, Krishna disrupts it. Kovida is expert. Krishna is expert in plundering, in plundering our material existence.
He, that means, wherever our consciousness gets locked, Krishna, Krishna disrupts it. Sometimes, because our consciousness is locked in that, we think, okay, this disturbance is there. Krishna, please restore this.
Please make this right. And that’s what, if Krishna makes it right, we think Krishna is very good. Krishna answers my prayers.
But, if that doesn’t happen, then we think, what is going on? Why is Krishna not answering my prayers? Like, what I’m asking, what is happening is the opposite of that. So, now, the purpose of Krishna is not to disrupt our life. The purpose of Krishna is to disrupt that which is interrupting our progress in life.
So, whenever anything which is dear to us is disturbed, we shouldn’t see that as God rejecting us or God not caring for us. Actually, God cares for us and that’s why He cares what we care for. And if that is restricting us, sometimes He disrupts us.
Not that He will take it away. But that, He will force us to think bigger. What does think bigger mean over here? So, all this we are talking about, blessings need to be understood.
And how do we understand the blessings? By linking with the liberator. Linking with the liberator means what? That ultimately, we have various relationships, we have various responsibilities, but ultimately, our relationship is with Krishna. That relationship is eternal.
And that responsibility of connecting with Krishna is our most important responsibility. If that is disrupted, if that is interrupted, that is impeded, then that is against our eternal spiritual well-being. So, what Krishna does sometimes is that He forces us to link with Him.
Whatever it is that we are attached to, that also becomes our shelter to some extent. But when that attachment is shaken, that shelter is shaken, then we have to expand our consciousness. Think of something beyond.
And that’s how we turn to Varkrishna. That’s how, so we link with Him. So, Krishna can give us many blessings, but Krishna is Krishna’s greatest blessing.
Krishna is Krishna’s greatest blessing. That means, if we turn towards Him, we make Him our shelter, He becomes our supreme attachment. He becomes our supreme object of love.
That is our ultimate shelter. So, now how do we link with the liberator? I’ll use one example to illustrate this point, and then we can have some question-answers. See, there is a bird.
And the bird is a small bird who is not yet fully developed its wings. The wings are there, but the bird has not actually flown. And, now, the bird has to fly.
But the bird is secure on a branch and doesn’t fly. And then suddenly, the branch under it starts shaking. And then the branch starts breaking.
Now, the bird is like, oh, let this branch become steady, let this branch become steady, but no. Now, when the bird is about to crash, then it starts flapping its wings. It flaps its wings, and as it flaps its wings, what happens? It seems to fly.
It has never flown before, so it can’t fly for long, but it’s flapping its wings, flapping its wings. And then, it’s on this branch here, and this branch starts breaking. And it flaps its wings and goes away.
And sits on, gets to the branch over there. That’s all it does. It gets from this branch to that branch.
So, it would never have flapped its wings and flown if the branch had not broken. So, for all of us, whatever we are attached to, that is like the branch under us. And it’s important for us.
Sometimes the branch breaks, or threatens to, it appears that it’s going to break. And our wings are our devotion, our connection with Krishna, our attachment to Krishna, our intuition to connect with Krishna. So, we often don’t focus on connecting with Krishna till the branch under us breaks.
When everything under our life is fine, then, yes, when I started practising bhakti, I was talking about bhakti with my uncle. He says, yes, I believe in God. He’s happy there, and I’m happy here.
Yes, you will be happy here, but our happiness is like a bird on a branch. The branch will break someday. So then, when the branch breaks, that’s when we are forced to flap our wings.
Now, sometimes we don’t flap our wings and we are crushed. So, if we don’t take shelter of Krishna, if we don’t grow spiritually at that time, we will sink into greater and greater suffering, greater and greater distress. We see nowadays, so many people are suffering from depression, mental health problems, and of course there can be many different causes for this.
But at one level, it is because people have lost a spiritual orientation. Because there is no ultimate meaning in life. There is no idea also that there is some ultimate meaning in life.
So, whatever gives them meaning, if it collapses, then what am I to do? What is my life? If for them everything is scoring well in their exams, or maybe having a relationship with someone, and if that crumbles, and they feel my life itself is no more, my existence is there, then I am worthless. So, we all need that ultimate connection. And if we don’t have that connection, if we don’t develop that connection, then we are crushed.
So, now, so, blessings are understood by linking, linking with the liberator. The breaking of the branch is not a blessing. But sometimes the breaking of the branch is necessary for us to discover the blessing of our beings.
So, bad things happen and they are bad. We don’t say that bad things are good. Bad things are bad, definitely.
But sometimes those bad things force us to turn toward God. Force us to take shelter of Him more. And that shelter that we experience with Him, that is the ultimate blessing.
So, we link with the liberator. The liberator means what? The bird that is stuck on the branch is liberated when its wings develop. So, similarly for each one of us, our attachments at one level shelter us, at another level they also fetter us, they also bind us, they also increase.
So, when we become liberated from them, that is the time when we move freely in life. Whatever life sends our way, it is the shelter of Krishna that helps us to face it, to go through it and to grow through it. So, O Krishna is Guna.
He is the liberator. He is… The world has distresses in many different ways. God is not the cause of the distress.
God is the cure for the distress. But as long as we expect that relief from the distress in our own terms, we don’t understand this. Instead, if we open to understanding that Krishna is actually eternal and that Krishna is eternal, I am eternal.
So, whatever might look very bad in the short term, through that Krishna will help me gain something in the long term. Through material adversity, Krishna may take me towards spiritual prosperity. And with that faith when we live, then we will find that, just as Arjuna has become Purusha and Shabba, he has become like a bull among men.
So, we are also bull among human beings. We will also become strong. Now, we will be surprised to discover how strong a devotion can make us to face life’s storms and to go through them and not to grow through them.
So, I will summarise what I spoke today. I spoke on the scheme of how we need to understand Krishna’s blessings. Blessings are understood by linking with the liberator.
So, I talked about Mukund Malasutra. So, Sri Vallabhati Vardeti Dayapareti. He is the blesser.
He is the lord of the waters of fortune. He is the giver of good fortune. But he is the giver of transiently good fortune.
That is, we think of blessings, that means, he gives out of the ordinary blessings. We give something temporary and he can give us something temporary. But he gives us something eternal.
And sometimes to give the eternal, he has to take away the temporary. He has to disrupt the temporary. So, blessings need to be understood.
Understood is, he is bhaktapriyeti bhavallu dhanakomite iti. He loves the devotees. Therefore, he takes away whatever is taking the devotee away from him.
He is expert at plundering the existential existence of the devotee. So, here plunder is used in a positive sense. It’s like kill.
It’s used in a positive sense. So, when we say he is plundering, it is not that he wants to cause us distress. Here is an example of how different things operate at different levels.
Just like a person might seem to be attacking us, but actually that person is attacking the one who is attacking us. Or the mother might say, clean the house. But the child is not conceptually old enough to understand that.
So, it needs to be step by step broken and understood. Similarly, when we approach God and think that God blesses us when we form the relationship in terms of my intelligence and your power. So, that’s also good.
At least we are going to God. We are aware that there is some power beyond me and I need to appease it, satisfy it to get what I want. So, God will bless us in that way also.
He blesses us that way. But sometimes He blesses us not according to our intelligence, what is best for us, but according to His intelligence. And at that time, instead of obsessing over why something is not happening the way we want it, we try to expand our consciousness.
Naturally, our consciousness expands from infancy when the child is just obsessed with one self. From the complete self-absorption to awareness of others. That’s how the child grows.
And this growth is meant to ultimately take us to Krishna. But during this expansion, we might get locked in something. So, every relationship at one level is good because it gets our consciousness out of ourselves.
But if we get caught in that relationship, then it is not commitment, but attachment. Attachment means our emotions are imprisoned. Commitment means our emotions are invested.
if something imprisons our consciousness and emotions, then Krishna may disrupt that. So, at that time, Krishna can give us various blessings, but Krishna is Krishna’s greatest blessing. So, when the blessings are not understood, we need to link with the liberator.
Link. He is already our master. He is already the Shankar within whom we are existing.
And even the greatest ninjas of the world are no danger to him. He reclines on his knees. So, when we link with him, that means, basically, when the branch under us breaks, we spread our wings.
The spreading of the wing is the development of our devotion and inclination. So, sometimes our material shelter is shaken and that forces us to turn toward the Lord. Of course, if we have no knowledge or inclination to turn toward the Lord, then we will crash down.
And that’s what is happening when people are psychologically crumbling. Because they don’t have any spiritual vision which gives ultimate meaning to their lives. So, he is ultimately the liberator.
He says, the bird might be comfortable on the branch, but it is bound to the branch if its wings are not developed. The shaking or breaking of the branch liberates the bird by forcing it to develop its wings. So, Krishna sometimes forces us to get our consciousness out of the things in which it is trapped.
And his purpose is that we see the channel through which whatever we are getting, we are getting. If the mother’s love is there, the mother feeding the child. But there is also God’s love who has provided the mother with the breast milk.
So, we see beyond the channel to the source. And that way, if we link with Krishna, then no matter whatever difficulties will come in our life, that connection with Krishna will transform that material adversity into spiritual prosperity. Thank you very much.
Hare Krishna. Are there any questions or comments? I have experienced myself and also talking to other devotees and families that coming to Krishna consciousness, we try to see eternality. In that sense, our connection with family members, because we want to be eternally attached to them, we want them also to become eternal or to achieve the eternal.
And because of that emotion, we tend to, our attachment to our children or family becomes more deeper than normal families who are attached to them. Because we think that we want them also to go back home. Is that attachment unhealthy or healthy or should we also eventually try to overcome that? So, sometimes when we start practising bhakti and pursue eternal life, we also want our family members to pursue that.
And that makes us more attached to them. Should we also give up that attachment? I think what you are talking about is not so much attachment as expectation. It’s just like we expect, say we have children, then all parents expect things from their children.
We may expect that they do well in their studies, they develop good habits. But then we also expect them to practise bhakti. And if we don’t, then it becomes like we feel agitated.
That is not happening. So yeah, you could say that our expectations from others increase. Of course, we are expecting something for their good only.
But still, our expectations increase. And see, in general, frustration is proportional to expectation. The more we expect, the more we get frustrated.
So, there are two different things. There is the little desire, and there is the expectation. Desire is what comes from us.
Expectation is what comes from them to us. So, we should always have the desire that everyone we love should also become spiritual. But, we shouldn’t have that expectation.
Especially, the expectation shouldn’t be a demand. Actually, last week, I was in North Carolina, so I gave a whole class on this topic about how the whole mood of the Bhagavad Gita is that from your place, at your place, access God’s grace. It’s from your place.
Not at your place. Everyone move at their own space. So, we could say there are three things over here.
Say, if we are here, Krishna is here, and our family members are here. So, we have our relationship with Krishna, we have our relationship with them, and there is their relationship with Krishna. So, often, in trying to develop their relationship with Krishna, we spoil our relationship with them.
And when that relationship is spoiled, our relationship with Krishna also gets spoiled. That means, we force somebody, do this, do this. And then, if they don’t do it, we force them, that what happens is, they get alienated from us.
And somebody who is close to us is alienated from us, that agitates us. Then even if we are chanting, we can’t focus on our chanting. So, we need to keep first things first.
Our relationship with Krishna is extremely important. And we make sure that our basic bhakti practises go on well. Then second is, we need to connect with others better at a human level first.
Sometimes we try to make our connection with others only at a spiritual level. But it’s important to connect at a human level. Human level means what? That if our family members see that our bhakti has made us a better mother, a better spouse, a better child, a better sibling.
That is what they will see. Prabhupada was asked, how do we know you are followers? Prabhupada said, they are perfect gentlemen and ladies. The idea is, you didn’t say that they wake up in the morning and they chant so many rounds and they follow the four regs.
There are so many rules. All that is there. But what does the world care about? How many rounds you chant? Why do I care? I don’t care.
So, it’s saying don’t tell me what you believe. Show me how you behave. So, if we connect better with them at a human level, say maybe we were very moody earlier and we become more stabilised.
Maybe we used to get angry and now we are calmer. Then they will see that change. So, we focus on improving the human connection with them.
And, if the human connection with them is improved, then they themselves oh, this changes, you follow it. Maybe it will change, we also follow it. Then they will also try to connect.
So, we can give them the way. We can open the door for them. But if they don’t walk through the door, we don’t hold it against them.
Everybody has their relationship with Krishna and everybody will move at their pace. So, certainly we should have desire but don’t have that expectation. And certainly don’t have that demand.
So, then we will find that actually even if they do something which we don’t like or which upsets us, if we are connected with Krishna and that connection with Krishna will stabilise us. And actually, in that case our vertical relationship with Krishna will bring greater stability in our horizontal relationship also. That’s why we say that we need to be humble and tolerant so that we can chant better.
Chant better means connect with Krishna better. So, actually this humility and tolerance is about the horizontal relationship with others. Humility and tolerance we already have with Krishna.
Krishna is great. And if Krishna does something, we have no option, we have to tolerate. So, there is not much point we can present it but ultimately we can’t change it.
But with others we think we can control them. So, if what Krishna is telling over here is in the Trinadapi Sunyachana, this verse Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is saying that we need to make our horizontal relationships as filled with humility and tolerance. Then our vertical relationship with Krishna will go unlimited.
Kirtaniyasana, So, try to have the desire but decrease the expectation from it. Any other question? Yes, please. Could you please elaborate because why you asked that the problem is getting attached is natural because going in a sea, swimming and not getting wet.
Okay. So, what is the difference between invested and imprisoned or attachment and commitment? If we are in family life, isn’t it natural that we get attached? Like going, entering into the ocean and not getting wet? Okay. The words can have different connotations at different times.
So, we also have to consider the reference point through which particular things are spoken. Say for example, now, the Bhagavatam may talk about how somebody should not be attached to family. And that is because they are living at the level of dharma, they are doing their dharmic responsibilities.
But now they have to rise to the level of parada. You could say there are three levels. Adharma, dharma and parada.
Paradharma is our spiritual connection with Krishna. Dharma is our religiosity in terms of doing the responsibilities in this world. Adharma is complete irresponsibility.
So, the Bhagavatam is talking about raising people from dharma to paradharma. So, don’t get attached to family. Learn that you are only Krishna in your dependent relationship.
And focus on your relationship with Krishna also. So, from that context, that is the point that is being spoken. But today, in many cases, actually, people are not even at this level.
They are taking up responsibilities. Many people actually just don’t want to take up responsibilities. That’s why, aversion to commitment is not detachment.
Nowadays, people are very commitment-phobic. So, detachment means that, okay, I don’t want to enjoy these things. That’s detachment.
But aversion to commitment is there are so many things to enjoy, I don’t want to lose any of the options. So, I’ll keep all options open. That is not detachment.
So, you could say, in the mode of ignorance, there is this aversion to commitment. In the mode of goodness, there is commitment. In the mode of passion, there will be attachment.
In the mode of passion, at least, okay, this is what I want to do. This is what I want to enjoy. In ignorance, I’m not even sure what I want to enjoy.
In goodness and beyond, okay, this is okay. I’ve experienced this, but there must be something more in life. So, we need to understand where we are.
So, as you rightly said that, certain amount of investment of emotion in our family is important. That’s the way we grow. Otherwise, we stay self-absorbed.
We won’t become Krishna absorbed. We’ll stay self-absorbed. So, it is every relationship forces us to come out of ourselves.
That is good. In the sense that, especially in today’s world where people tend to be individualistic, obsessively individualistic. Everybody is an I-specialist.
Not I-specialist, I-specialist. So, it’s good to come out of that. But at the same time, we have to understand that, okay, this relationship is important, but why is it important? Because, ultimately, this soul is also a part of Krishna.
I am also a part of Krishna. So, I am linking with this soul, but I also want to link with Krishna. So, that means that, there should be affection, but no attachment.
What is the difference again? When we are attached to someone, we will, we are more concerned about their pleasure than their well-being. We are more concerned about their pleasure than their well-being. So, for example, if a child is sick, child has typhoid.
The child says, I want to eat fried food. And the child starts crying. The mother says, oh, my child is crying.
So, okay, you take this fried food. And she is concerned about her pleasure, but what is happening? She is not concerned about the welfare. So, we, of course, don’t want to displease anyone, but sometimes, every relationship will require for the welfare of the other person, we have to do something which we don’t want to do.
So, attachment means that whatever they want, we will do it, no matter what the price. What the price for us, price for them, price for our values, our purposes, everything. That is bad.
But affection means, we care for the person, we care for their emotions, we care for their pleasure, but we also care for their well-being. And ideally, when there is the pleasure and the well-being, both can come together. But if it doesn’t come, then sometimes we are ready to say no for their pleasure, so that we can say yes for their well-being.
So, that’s why, it’s not a, say, rather than worrying about whether we are getting attached in family life, we focus on connecting with Krishna seriously. If we can maintain the connection with Krishna, if we can steadily practise bhakti, then that itself will stabilise us. And whatever inevitable storms will come in that relationship, we will navigate them.
So, bhakti is not so much a process of giving up as taking up. Not giving up our relationship, but taking up the eternal relationship with Krishna. And if you focus on that, just try to steadily connect with Krishna, then the dhami buddhi yogam tam yena mam punyam.
Krishna imbues the intelligence by which you can come to Him. Okay? Okay. Any other questions? Krishna takes away those things that take us away from Him.
So, Krishna takes away those things that take us away from Him. I did not ever do pujas asking for material things, but when I was more happy, I was able to think of God and worship sincerely more than… So, what is the answer? So, sometimes it is in a happy condition that we may worship Krishna with greater focus, and in a distressful condition it becomes difficult to devote us. That’s true.
See, that’s why the important thing is not that distress is the cause of devotion. If distress was the cause of devotion, all the hospitals would be filled with devotees. Actually, it is the conscious decision to turn toward Krishna that will take us toward Him.
And it is our responsibility to try to organise life in such a way that distress can be minimised. We say that this world is a place of distress. But, if you see, at the start of the Bhagavad Gita, Arjuna is crying.
He is in great distress. Now, Krishna doesn’t tell Arjuna this world is a place of distress. Krishna speaks the whole message of the Bhagavad Gita, and by the end of it, Arjuna has calmed down.
Arjuna is calm. So, the idea here is that it is our responsibility, our means individually and socially, to arrange society and arrange our lives in such a way that distress can be minimised. So, it is true that if there is too much uncertainty, then it becomes difficult to practise bhakti.
Say, for example, on some days, say, once a week, say, tomorrow day, we fast. And maybe because of that austerity, we think of Krishna. But that is a voluntarily chosen austerity.
But suppose we are so poor that we don’t have any food on a regular basis. Now, that lack of food won’t help us remember Krishna. Isn’t it? It’s occasional deprivation of material necessities can impel us to turn towards Krishna more.
But constant deprivation won’t necessarily facilitate turning towards God. So, we do need to work at a material level also to set things right. But sometimes something just can’t be set right.
So, then we have to learn to accept that and move on. So, it’s not that distress itself is a virtue. It is a certain level of material well-being is needed so that we can focus on spirituality.
See, like say, all of us are sitting and we are discussing about Krishna. Now, if right now, the place where we are sitting, all of it is filled with thorns or nails, we can’t sit comfortably. Or, say, I was in New Zealand and suddenly I was giving a class and suddenly everybody seemed to be moving.
And I thought, I was also moving. What happened? It was an earthquake. Really? Now, I had never been a part of all this before and everybody is so calm.
It’s an earthquake. See, earthquakes happen once or twice a week over here. Of course, there are minor earthquakes.
It is not much, but it’s a little unusual. If the earth below is shaking, we cannot focus on giving class or anything like that. So, we do need a certain level of material stability.
And it’s not that distress is the producer of emotion. It’s rather it is our conscious desire to turn towards Krishna. And in the Vedic scriptures also, Krishna talks about dharma at two levels.
He says, I come to establish dharma in the world. What does it mean? I come to establish social order so that spiritual order can flourish. So, we need social order, no doubt about it.
So, when Krishna says that he is doing it consciously, not because he is distressed, but he is very distressed, but like you said, the minute you are distressed, you have to face Krishna. But definitely, consciously, we face Krishna or turn to Krishna in distress. Yes, that’s true.
So, is it that even those who turn towards Krishna in distress, they are consciously turning towards him? Yes, that’s why Krishna says, Sukrutina. Chitur midha bhajante ma janaha sukrutino arjuna aartho jinkhyo svartharthi jnani chidur darshana Sukrutina means they have some piety that makes them turn towards God. Otherwise, in distress, somebody might turn towards drinking, somebody might turn towards adding drugs, somebody might turn towards so many other things in the world.
So, that is the intuition to turn towards the Lord, definitely. And it is, that’s what is appreciated. Even if they are turning towards God simply for material things, but this is the turning towards God.
So, thank you very much. Shri Prabhupada ki Jai! Jai! Shri Kulshekhar Maharaj ki Jai! Jai! Jai! Jai! Jai!