How we spend more time avoiding pain than seeking pleasure – and why we shouldn’t

[Congregation program at Corvallis, Oregon, USA]

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This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
Hare Krishna. Thank you for coming today evening. I will speak today on the topic of how we spend more time avoiding pain than seeking pleasure.
And why we shouldn’t. So, I will speak based on the Bhagavad Gita 5.20 नप्रहृषेत् प्रियं प्राप्य नोद्विजेत् प्राप्यचा प्रियं स्तिरबुद्धिर असं मूड हो ब्रह्मविद् ब्रह्मणिस्तितः Krishna says that do not be delighted when you get pleasure. नप्रहृषेत् प्रियं प्राप्य नोद्विजेत् प्राप्यचा प्रियं and don’t become irritated when you get pain.
Just, what should you do? स्तिरबुद्धिर असं मूड हो स्तिरबुद्धिर Be fixed in your intelligence. असं मूड हो Be undeluded. And ब्रह्मविद् ब्रह्मणिस्तितः He says what you can do is be fixed in spiritual knowledge.
ब्रह्मविद् And ब्रह्मणिस्तितः In this way becomes situated in spiritual consciousness itself. Suppose we say come out of our house to go to some place and then on the way we see someone whom we don’t like. We say I want to avoid this person.
And then we go in a different direction. And there we meet somebody else then we see somebody else whom we want to avoid. And again we take another direction.
And again we see somebody else whom we don’t like. And then again we take another direction. Then we will never get to our destination.
So if we go out and while going out our main purpose was to go to do some work but along the way we started meeting unpleasant people and we wanted to avoid them. And in avoiding them we ended up not getting to our destination itself. That would be foolish.
At a physical level we would never do such a thing. If I have to go there even if that person is there I will just maybe they will glance darkly at me I will neglect that and I will move on. If there are some people who tease or make fun, ridicule I will just neglect that and I will move on.
I will deal with them in whatever way is appropriate that time but my goal is not just avoiding them. If I can avoid them, that’s fine. But if I can’t avoid them my purpose is to get to my destination.
Similarly in our life while physically we would never just let avoidance of someone be the prime factor in our movement but at an emotional level that is what we do frequently. At an emotional level we all just by going through the course of life will experience unpleasant sensations. We sometimes feel bored sometimes we feel depressed sometimes we feel lonely sometimes we feel doubtful of everything, of everyone sometimes we may feel just gloomy.
So now these feelings are just a part of living in the material world. One survey of people in the western world said that people are 5% of the time happy 5% of the time unhappy and 90% bored. So 90% of the time there is nothing stimulating happening and more often than not when people start indulging in some destructive habits say when somebody starts drinking initially it might just be because they wanted to hang out with the crowd and everybody was drinking so they said I’ll also drink.
But after sometime when they get hooked to it then it is initially they drink and then hey this makes me feel high I want to do it more. But after sometime when they get attached to drinking they get addicted they then don’t drink to get high they just drink to feel normal. Because after sometime it is not that drinking gives them a high rather not drinking causes them a low.
And when not drinking causes them a low they drink to come back to feeling normal. This is how they get addicted to something which actually doesn’t even give much pleasure. But not doing it causes pain.
And after sometime especially after any sober any thoughtful person gets addicted to something be it drugs or drinking or smoking after sometime they realise I am going on a dangerous path I should not be doing this. They may or may not admit it publicly depending on the kind of image they want to have in society. Sometimes young people may just want a lucky go happy kind of image.
They may not admit it but they are internally a little apprehensive. But then even if they want to give it up they can’t because there is because there is the withdrawal symptoms there is the pain that comes which they just can’t resist. So this we could say applies to extreme people.
We are not addicted to things like that. That is true. But consider something more common.
When people watch television how often is it that the programme on TV is so good that I am just longing to watch it a particular programme. Sometimes it might be there but most of the times it is not because the programme is so entertaining it is because life is so boring that we want to break from that. And then after sometime the result of this is that the more we get stimulated by whatever fare is available on television the more real life stops stimulating us.
Because everything on television is digitally enhanced is high level of cosmetics and everything is so attractively arranged that our senses get used to that kind of pleasure. And then what happens in real life? This is nothing attractive. This doesn’t seem pleasant.
This doesn’t seem attractive enough. And then after sometime people start watching television not because television is so entertaining it is rather not watching television makes life unbearably boring. Like earlier I said this was the normal level of consciousness of alcoholic.
They drank to go high up. But then after sometime not drinking makes them go lower than normal. The same principle happens to us.
Say our normal level of life is like this. And yes we do feel bored in life. Then we watch TV.
That gives us some stimulation. But because the stimuli on television are so artificially hyped up that after that when we come back to normal life normal life appears very boring. And that means our consciousness has gone over here.
Normal life has become more boring than what it was earlier. And then after that we want television even more. And it’s not so that I can go up till here.
I just want it to come up to here. That’s why in general when people get addicted to something they cannot be satisfied with the same doses of that thing. Initially a person will just say I’ll drink once a month.
But then it won’t stay once a month. It will become more and more and more. So similarly with respect to stimulation it may be television.
People can get addicted to television. And spend hours and hours watching television. And what has happened over there? It is they feel I need this so much.
And they need it just to feel normal. So they are watching television not to get some pleasure. They are watching television to avoid the pain of boredom.
Avoid the pain that life feels so empty without it. Life feels so unattractive without it. I was once at a college programme and there was a student who had written on his T-shirt.
Sometimes people write all kinds of provocative things. This boy had written 90% of the world’s girls are beautiful. The remaining 10% are in my college.
Now how does he know how 90% are? How 10% are? But his idea of the 90% has come from watching TV. Watching TV, watching movies. Everybody else is so attractive.
But the people around him are not attractive. So what happens over here is our conception of how the world is or should be become shaped by an artificial image. By artificial depiction.
And when that artificial depiction shapes our conception of how things should be then the real appears not just disappointing but unbearably disappointing. And when it appears unbearably disappointing we go more forcefully into that artificial world to try to get some stimulation. So in real life we all will go through times when as I said we’ll feel depressed, we’ll feel lonely, we’ll feel hurt, we will feel unheard.
So these are just a normal part of living. Of course if the same feeling goes on continuously then it is a matter of concern. But just going through life emotional unpleasantness is just normal.
And to the extent we think that this shouldn’t be like this. Life at the physical level is not always very stimulating. If somebody is a food addict just like there is Alcoholics Anonymous there are so many other anonymous organisations.
One of them is Foodaholics Anonymous. People are just addicted to eating. Of course they can have the other opposite also.
They are just so they are anorexic. They just don’t feel like eating. They have bulimia and other eating disorders.
So basically eating is a natural function. But sometimes the mind may do it too much. It may crave for it too much.
Or the mind may say, I can’t, I don’t want to do this. Either way, so then these people who are Foodaholics Anonymous who are a part of that then for them the basic problem is that food is something which you just can’t avoid. Alcohol is something there is no need to drink it.
But food is something which is we all normally have to eat it. And if our mental perceptions get distorted about that then some people become so food conscious that constantly thinking when can I get the next food, when can I get the next food, when can I get the next food to eat. Now if one’s consciousness is reduced to Annamaya Kosh.
Annamaya Kosh is the level of consciousness where we think primarily of food. That is actually the consciousness of an infant, of a newborn. For the infant, everything is potential food.
Isn’t it? Whatever they sit and put in their mouth, they put their fingers in their mouth, they put their legs in their mouth. When they get some toys, they put the toys also in their mouth. So in that infancy, they experience the world primarily through the tongue.
So now if an adult or a youth is at that level, constantly craving for food, then how much in a day can anyone eat? Even if we keep munching some chewing gum or whatever, we can’t do it 24 hours a day. And even if we keep munching chewing gums, the chewing gums also lose taste after some time. So basically, if somebody’s consciousness is reduced to the level of thinking that life stimulation is needed, then they can get that stimulation at best for maybe an hour a day.
They take 3-4 meals and some snacks in between, maybe 1.5 hours, 2 hours. That’s all. So in the remaining say 10-15 hours, 15 hours they are awake or whatever, what do they do? Life is boring for them.
They may do their job, they may do their studies, but there’s nothing interesting over there. So now, what has happened is the consciousness level has shrunk down to the level of food. I’m giving food simply as an example to illustrate that they can get sensory stimulation or any kind of stimulation primarily at the level of food.
Krishna says in the Bhagavad Gita that one result of excessive sensual indulgence is that our consciousness becomes not just unavailable to Krishna, but not only unavailable for Krishna, it also becomes unfavourable to Krishna. तस्मात्तं इन्द्रियाण्यादो नियम्य बरतर्षभा पापमानं प्रजहियेनं ज्ञान विज्ञान नाशिनम् This is ज्ञान विज्ञान नाशिनम् This is in 3.41 in the Bhagavad Gita. ज्ञान means knowledge.
विज्ञान in this context means even the inclination to acquire knowledge. That also is lost. Is there anything higher in life? Is there some spiritual side to life? That is, enquiring is not, there is a spiritual knowledge.
I don’t have spiritual knowledge and I don’t have interest in knowing anything spiritual also. So when we become too attached to sensual things, while we are indulging in those things, our consciousness is unavailable for Krishna. But, even before and after that, because we are so caught in sensuality, we think, oh, this is something different, this is not for me.
So, our consciousness becomes deadened to Krishna. It becomes unfavourable to Krishna. So what do we do? Say, as some people sometimes, we may eat too much or eat too little, because somehow we are trying to deal with some unpleasant sensations.
Somebody may feel too lonely and they try to be comfortable. Or somebody may feel, I don’t look attractive enough, and they go on a manic diet. And then they are so obsessed with their figure that they just neglect their eating.
So in all these cases, the normal human consciousness, which involves interacting with food for the purpose of bodily sustenance, and of course bodily pleasure also. But, when we eat, we want to eat to get nutrition, we also want to eat to get satisfaction. But, when one is sought at the expense of other, and one looks for only pleasure and neglects the nutrition, then that becomes a problem.
So sometimes we may, our normal activity of eating may get disrupted, because we want to avoid some unpleasant sensations somewhere else. I don’t want to feel, when I am lonely, I feel uncomfortable. And then, to avoid the discomfort, I start eating.
Or, when I feel bored, I need some stimulation. And then food offers me some stimulation, so I start eating. Or, when I think that I don’t look attractive enough, I feel very uncomfortable.
Therefore, I stop eating. So either way, what has happened, that activity of eating, which is a normal biological activity, has become impeded, disrupted, either to excess or too little, too much or too little, by the psychological inability to cope with discomfort, to cope with some negative emotion. It may be loneliness, it may be perceived lack of attractiveness, or whatever.
So while we are going through life, we may say, okay, if I am feeling bad, how can I just, I have to do something about it. As in I am feeling lonely, I am feeling bored, I am feeling depressed, should I do something about it? Yes, definitely. It is not that, when we are feeling bad, we should just passively stay feeling bad.
But the point is, that we need to have some higher purpose of life than avoiding feeling bad. Just like say, if I am going on a road, now if I meet some person who just glares at me, who shouts at me, speaks foul words to me, then, yes, it is a natural human emotion to want to avoid encountering that person. But my purpose should not be just to avoid encountering that person.
My purpose has to be to go somewhere. And if I am moving towards that destination, okay, that person may follow me for some time, that person will leave and I can move on. So, similarly, for us, we need to have some higher purpose to life.
And what can that higher purpose be? Unfortunately, in the materialistic conception of life, there is no higher purpose. Because life’s purpose is to enjoy pleasant sensations. In the materialistic conception of life, Krishna says in 16.11 and 12 in the Bhagavad Gita, while he is describing the characteristics of the ungodly people, the materialistic people, they think, that fulfilling their worldly desires, enjoying pleasant sensations, be they of the eyes, of the ears, of the skin, of the tongue, of the nose, just enjoying pleasant sensations is the goal of life.
They have ascertained it for sure. It is said that the problem with the world is that the wise are doubtful and the foolish are overconfident. So materialistic people sometimes are extremely confident.
If I just get this, I’ll be happy. As devotees, we think, does Krishna really exist? Even if I go to Krishna, is it really worth it? Does it have to be done now? Will this bhakti take me there? There are so many doubts, which slow us down on our spiritual path. So, the point here is, that at the material level, sensations are, or pleasant sensations are conceived of as the purpose of life.
When getting pleasant sensations is the purpose of life, then avoiding, then getting unpleasant sensations is seen as a defeat. And when that defeat comes, nobody likes to be defeated. So therefore, people become obsessed with avoiding unpleasant sensations.
Sometimes the people who are in this modern world are very proud of the progress of modernity. We may be with our devices constantly, may be surfing this, watching this, reading this, chatting over here. Sometimes people say, you know, in the past, people must have lived such boring lives.
Now we have hundreds of news channels, TV channels, movies to watch. People had nothing in the past. How were they living? Actually, they were living quite well.
It is, yes, entertainment is not a bad thing, when done in moderation. Krishna says, Yuktahara Viharasya. Vihara is a creation, it is entertainment, in a regulated way.
But, now, it is not so much that our, that we have so much entertainment available and that’s why our life is more enjoyable. And in the past, people didn’t have so much entertainment available, so their life must have been so dreary. Rather, it is the fact that we need so much entertainment that indicates how our life in itself is so dreary.
How our life in itself is so empty, so boring, so unfulfilling that we just desperately crave for entertainment. In today’s world, the most paid professionals are usually the entertainers. The movie stars, the sports stars, they just get phenomenal amounts of money.
And, what a society values reflects its values. So, why are people ready to pay billions and millions of dollars to some entertainment stars? It’s not just the producers who are paying to them. The producers are able to pay because the viewers, the consumers are watching it and they are ready to spend money for it.
So, the irony is that even in sports, sports is not so much about performance, it is about entertainment. There was a female boxer from northeast, she won some medals, and then Bollywood made a movie about her. Now, the Bollywood actress who depicted that boxer, by that one movie, she made more money than what this boxer made throughout her life.
So, the reality is that okay, boxing is one form of entertainment and she makes some money through that. But television or movies, what it does is it hypes up the level of entertainment. And then, people are ready to pay much more for watching somebody who is not even a boxer, acting as if she is boxing.
Why is that? Because the need for entertainment is so great. And most often, we look for entertainment not because the entertainment is so enjoyable, but because life without it is so boring. Now, there are three problems with trying to avoid negative feelings.
Loneliness, depression, boredom. The first problem is that no matter how much we avoid, they do come upon us. If… I don’t want to be bored at all.
So, you know, I keep one phone with me and I keep two SIM cards so that if one data goes off, something else will be there, something else I’ll watch. I’ll keep two phones with me. If not this, not this.
But then, sooner or later, all the programmes, everything that I’m watching is boring. So then, if we have defined ourselves by our capacity or our expertise to avoid negative feelings, then when negative feelings come upon us, then that creates an even more negative reaction. Because we start feeling that something is wrong with me.
Why am I feeling bored? Why am I feeling depressed? I should not be feeling like this. I should not be feeling lonely. I should not be feeling this.
I should not be feeling that. And that becomes a further complex. So, first is our efforts fail sooner or later.
When those efforts to avoid negative feelings fail, they make us feel like failures. And then, more often than not, in trying to avoid those negative feelings, we often do activities that decrease the quality of our life. Say for example, I spend a lot of time watching entertainment.
Then what have I achieved by it? Some people just compulsively spend time on social media, chatting, chatting, chatting. Now, this is, social media can be a valuable way of connecting with people. And we live in an isolated world today.
So, any form of connection is valuable. But, sometimes it becomes an obsession. People spend, oh, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk.
I just got so many, spending, clicking here, clicking there, clicking there. If that is done, if connection in social media is done primarily as a way to escape from the emptiness of life, then that itself starts decreasing. People don’t have very deep connections.
So, the activities, a person doesn’t want to feel bored, doesn’t want to feel lonely, so they start drinking. And we can see at a very gross level, that decreases the quality of their life. They lose their health, they lose their money, they lose their reputation.
But at a subtler level also, whatever we do to avoid negative emotions, that actually is not a very purposeful activity. Just like say, if I am going somewhere, and I had to reach to a particular destination at a particular time. But, if I avoid this person, so I go this way, avoid this person, so I go this way, avoid this person, so I go this way.
And then all that is actually wasting my time. It is decreasing the quality of my life. And this way, so, this attempt to avoid negative emotions actually ends up creating more negativity in our life.
Because the negative emotions come anyway, and the negative emotions coming make us feel as if we are failures. And in trying to avoid negative emotions, whatever we have done, that has decreased the quality of our life. So, what do we do? What do we do about this? This is where the Bhagavad Gita’s message, that this world is Dukkhalayam.
This world is a place of distress. This comes in. Now, it’s not that because this world is a place of distress, we all have to be in distress.
That’s not the message of the Bhagavad Gita. Otherwise, at the start of the Bhagavad Gita, Arjuna was in tears. तं तथा कृपया विष्टं अश्रो पूर्णा कुलेक्षणम् विषीदं तमिदं वाक्यं वाच्यमदु सुधन So, he is crying in public in front of everyone.
So, he is in great distress. And Krishna could have said, Arjuna, this world is Dukkhalayam. Now, you have got to realise this world is Dukkhalayam.
So, over. Bhagavad Gita is over. That is not what Krishna does.
Krishna speaks the Bhagavad Gita and by the end of his speaking of the Bhagavad Gita, Arjuna has become calm. नश्टो मोहस्मतिल्लब्धा तत्फ्रसादान्मयाचुत सितोस्मिगतसंदेह करिषेवचिनम्तव सितोस्मिगतसंदेह So, he says, I have become well situated now. So, my agitation has gone.
So, the message of the Bhagavad Gita helps Arjuna to become free from distress. So, what is the meaning when the Bhagavad Gita says that this world is Dukkhalaya? That distress is a feature of the world. But it is not the purpose of the world.
Distress is a feature of the world. There is going to be distress in this world. But it is not that the purpose of the world is to keep us in distress.
The purpose of the world is something else. To understand this difference between feature and purpose, let’s consider the example of a hospital. Now, pain is a feature of the hospital.
Anybody in the hospital will be having some kind of pain or the other. But pain is not a purpose of the hospital. The hospital is not a torture chamber meant to cause everyone pain.
The hospital, everybody who is in the hospital is likely to be in pain. But the hospital also has a system by which people can become free from pain. However, while the patient is in the hospital, the primary purpose of the patient is not just to avoid pain.
The primary purpose is to take the treatment. A part of the treatment is also to minimise the pain. Doctors give painkillers to minimise the pain.
But sometimes doctors do things which may increase the pain also. Doctors may give injections, doctors may do surgeries, doctors may do some kind of probes which are quite invasive. So at that time, if somebody thinks, I don’t want this.
And if their primary purpose in being in a hospital is to avoid pain, then what will they do? They will not take the treatment. And instead, they will simply focus on taking painkillers. And just taking painkillers is dangerous.
What will happen? The pain is not getting cured, it is getting covered. And while the disease is worsening inside, eventually they will need more and more doses of painkillers. Ultimately, a time will come when no matter how much dose we have of painkillers, it will just not be enough.
A balanced treatment given by a doctor will have some curative medicine and will also have some pain medicine. It’s not that the doctor wants the patients to be in pain. But it is also not that the doctor is going to do just pain avoidance.
Doctor’s primary purpose is that you take the treatment. And sometimes taking the treatment causes pain, then they have to accept that. If a person is very weak, doctor tells them do exercise.
Now if they had a fracture or they had a very innervating disease, then doing exercise causes pain. But if they say that I don’t want pain, they will never become healthy. So similarly when the Bhagavad Gita says this world is a place of distress, the implication is that this world is like a hospital.
And our focus here should not just be on avoiding unpleasant sensations. That will be like simply avoiding pain. Our focus should be on taking treatment.
And the treatment is the practise of Bhakti Yoga. The same verse in which Krishna talks about Dukkhalaya Ashashvata, what is the stress of that verse? 8.15 in the Bhagavad Gita says, maam upetya punar janma dukkhalaya maashashvatam naapnuvanti mahatmanaha samsiddhim paramam gathaha He says maam upetya punar janma that those who become devoted me, they do not come back to this world. naapnuvanti mahatmanaha, they are great souls.
Where do they not come back? To this world. dukkhalaya maashashvatam. And what happens to them? samsiddhim paramam gathaha, they attain the supreme destination.
So Krishna’s stress is not on this world of dukkhalaya maashashvatam. Krishna’s stress in the verse is on, by practising bhakti, you can go out of this world and attain maya bodh, which is filled with happiness. So in a sense, he is saying this world is a place of distress.
It’s just an incidental fact. That’s not the central point of the verse. The point of the verse is, yes, this world is a place of distress, but by practising bhakti, you can become free from distress.
So now when we are practising bhakti, at that time also, it may happen that we focus on avoiding unpleasant sensations more than seeking the connection with Krishna. So now earlier when I talked about there is avoiding, we focus more on avoiding pain than on seeking pleasure. There both was at the material level.
In the materialistic conception of life, we want to avoid unpleasant sensations and we want pleasant sensations. Now bhakti, also sometimes we’ll get pleasant sensations, sometimes unpleasant sensations. However, in bhakti, our purpose is not just sensation.
Our purpose is connection. We want to connect with Krishna. So this is the material level of consciousness.
This is the spiritual level of consciousness. And now our purpose is to connect with Krishna who is at the spiritual level of consciousness. And by connecting with him, we will rise to a level of consciousness where there will ultimately be natural and constant happiness.
The atma is sat-chit-ananda. The atma is eternally joyful. And if we realise our spiritual identity, if we come to the spiritual level of consciousness, we will become naturally joyful.
You may say that going to the spiritual level of consciousness is a very long journey. Yes, it is a very long journey. But the wonderful thing about this journey is that the fruit is not just at the destination.
We can start experiencing glimpses of spiritual joy even as we go along that journey. Yes, there is constant unending joy at the end of that journey. But along that journey also, there is experience of pleasure.
And there is increasing experience of pleasure. So the more we focus on connecting with Krishna, to that extent, we will move towards a higher level of consciousness. And there, the unpleasant sensations will not trouble us so much.
So going back to 5.20, the verse which I started the class with, Krishna 1 says, Don’t be delighted when you get pleasant sensations and don’t be dejected when you get unpleasant sensations. And here, both are important. We don’t want unpleasant sensations, but we want pleasant sensations at the material level of consciousness.
And it just doesn’t work like that. If I think that when I get pleasant sensations, I will enjoy. And when I get unpleasant sensations, I will become detached.
It doesn’t work like that. If I am a mad fan of cricket, if India wins, and I jump in joy, Oh, India has won. If India loses, I can’t say, I am detached from cricket.
No, it won’t work. To the extent I delight in India’s winning, to that extent, I will be afflicted when India loses. So therefore, what Krishna is saying is, become detached from both.
Both from delighting in pleasant sensations or being dejected by unpleasant sensations. But focus instead on, Make your intelligence fixed. Ultimately, whatever I am going to get at the sensory level is insubstantial.
Don’t be deluded by thinking, Oh, this will be so enjoyable, that will be so enjoyable. Ultimately, everything at the material level is just going to give a little pleasure. Shri Prabhupada says, that most of the pleasure at the material level is in the anticipation.
Anticipation. Oh, this food is going to be so good, so good, so good. Oh, this pleasure is going to be so much, so much, so much, so much.
But actually when you get the pleasure, it is from anticipation to anticlimax. What? Over? No. There must be something more.
But it’s over. It’s gone. So, asambudho, don’t get deluded by it.
What is brahma vid brahma nisthitaha? Know that you are spiritual and stay focused on trying to become spiritually situated. And to the extent we focus on connecting with Krishna, yes, we don’t have to deny our feelings. It is not that just because I am a devotee, I should not feel lonely.
Sometimes it’s just a natural thing that happens. Even as a devotee, I may feel depressed. Sometimes as a devotee, I may feel sad.
These are emotions, these are normal human emotions. It is not that when we have to spiritualise ourselves, that means we have to dehumanise ourselves. Spiritualising ourselves is not dehumanising ourselves.
Dehumanising means it is as if because I have become spiritual, that means I should not feel any human emotions. Just being in this material world, in a human body means we go through certain emotions. And we acknowledge those emotions.
Yes, I am feeling depressed right now. No need to deny that. No need to feel guilty about that.
The mind is so cunning. Sometimes we feel worried. I have this problem, that problem.
What will happen about this? What will happen about that? We feel worried. And then we think, I am a devotee, I should have faith in Krishna. If I had faith in Krishna, so I would not be worried.
Oh no, I don’t have faith in Krishna. I am such a poor fallen devotee. So what happens is, that first we have worry, and that causes negativity.
And then after that, I am not a good devotee, that causes me anxiety. That causes me negativity. Sometimes, I am not going to be worried.
And then I still feel worried. And what happens? I get worried about being worried. In this way, we can simply get caught in the mind.
Acknowledge. Yes. I am feeling lonely.
The thought that I am feeling lonely is coming in my mind. It is there. It’s just like, some unpleasant person is there, over there.
Acknowledge their presence. Sometimes, if we are urgently going to meet someone, we see someone, but we don’t stop to talk with them. Just nod our head and move on.
If we don’t even acknowledge them, they will write, come in the way, stop, I won’t talk with you. But if you just keep walking and nod at them, okay, you are present. But if our walking along indicates to them that we are busy right now, we can’t talk with them.
We just move on. So like that, we can just give a nod. Yes, this feeling is there right now, but I have my purpose.
My purpose is to connect with Krishna. And if I focus on connecting with Krishna, that feeling which is there will go away. But if instead, I focus on trying to make that feeling go away, then I will get distracted from Krishna.
So if I feel lonely, what should I do now? Maybe I should talk with this person. Maybe I should talk with that person. Yes, that’s one solution.
But if we are having some constructive service, and in that course of service, we connect with people. That will be a much more deeper connection than just some chit-chatting or gossiping which we might do just to kill loneliness. Now, association doesn’t come just by physical proximity.
Association comes really by emotional affinity. Emotional affinity means two people’s emotions are similar. Two people are close to each other at an emotional level.
And emotional affinity, emotional likeness comes when, most often it comes when we have a common purpose. I am doing this service, you are doing this service, let us do it together. So when we have a purpose to serve Krishna, then we will be able to tolerate and penetrate through whatever negative emotions come in us.
I will conclude with one point, then we can have some questions. I said that we shouldn’t expect that we should not have negative emotions. Loneliness, depression, fear, grief, whatever, what does it mean? As I said, they are human emotions and they will come.
Now there are, say for example, if I have a physical injury, say I fall down and get a fracture. Now the fracture is an injury and I am going to feel pain and it is going to take its time to recover. So, now what do I do at that time? I let that leg rest and when I have to properly exercise it, I exercise it and it will recover.
So, if during the time when it is meant to rest, I start walking on it, that will aggravate the injury. If the time when I am supposed to exercise, that time I don’t, I just keep it passive. Again, that will also aggravate the weakness.
So, there is a right response to it. So, initially I need to rest the leg and then after that I need to exercise the leg. So, similarly, recently one devotee asked a question to me, if somebody whom we love very closely, a very close family member, they pass away, then is our grief on their passing away, is that a material attachment? Should we not feel grief? I said, no, not like that.
Just because we are spiritual doesn’t mean that we are not meant to have any human emotions. When a loved one passes away, there is an emotional wound created. Just like if I am injured physically, there is a physical wound created.
So, there is an emotional wound and for the healing of that emotional wound, there is a natural process of grieving. The Mahabharata and the Ramayana both describe how the characters over there would go through the process of grieving. When the Kurukshetra war got over, Prabhupada writes in the Bhagavatam that all of them they went and performed the last rites by offering water in the Ganges and then they all grieved for it.
When Maharadasha passed away, there is a national period of mourning throughout the city, throughout the Kingdom of Ayodhya. So, there is a natural process of grieving. So, during grieving, we may talk about the people, like when devotees may pass away, and we may have a condolence meeting where we remember the good qualities of that person.
Now, this is, and at that time we may cry also. At that time, it’s just a natural way, that’s what we need for that emotional wound to be addressed. The emotional wound is there, sometime I need to rest.
So, similarly, initially when that grief is there, that loss is there, that emotional wound is there, it will express itself. But, if we keep thinking of it again and again and again, why did this happen, why did this person leave, why, why, why? Then, the season of grieving will become a lifetime of grieving. Sometimes you may just, oh, this is a bad loss for me, emotionally wounded, I stay alone, I stay a little bit reflective, but then after that I have to come out again.
I have to go back to normal life. Initially I rest my leg, then I have to exercise my leg. So, to say that right from the beginning I should exercise my leg, will perpetuate the injury.
So, it’s not that when there is a loss, there should not be any grieving, or grieving is a sign of maternal attachment. No, grieving is a natural process of being a human being, having other human connections. And when you lose the connections, there will be grieving.
But, we shouldn’t perpetuate the grieving. Yes, the person has passed away, they have gone to some other destination, I have to go on with my life. So, just as after the wound heals, if the wound is there, say if I have a rash and I keep scratching the rash, it’s going to get worse.
So, I don’t scratch it again and again, but I let it heal. So, we accept that negative feelings, just like if somebody’s loved one has passed away, we understand that there will be grieving at that time. That’s just the natural emotion at that time.
So, the purpose is not just to avoid the natural emotion. You go through that natural emotion and then grow through that. So, if we have a higher understanding of life, we will accept negative emotions.
We don’t go out of our way to welcome negative emotions. We don’t go out of our way to invite negative emotions. But when they come, we accept them, we tolerate them and we penetrate through them.
So, we will be able to penetrate through them when we have a strong, higher purpose to our life. And it’s bhakti that gives us that higher purpose. And bhakti is not just an abstract activity of, oh, I have some devotion for Krishna.
Nor is it simply chanting or studying scripture or coming to the temple or coming in association. This is important. But the essence of bhakti is developing a personal connection with Krishna.
And that connection is most effectively developed through some service. If I have a service for Krishna, that fills my mind. Yes, I’ll keep doing this, I’ll keep doing this, I’ll keep doing this.
And that way, we will be able to move forward towards Krishna. Prabhupada says in a lecture that, how do you know that you are Krishna conscious? He says, if you go in from the temple, go in from, in front of the deities, and if you feel that Krishna is telling you, what are you doing for me? If you feel like that, then you are Krishna conscious. Most people, when they go to temple, they ask God, what are you doing for me? Yes.
We have our prayers, we have our needs, that’s fine. And we can ask Krishna also when we need. But the important thing is, if I have a relationship of service with Krishna, we feel that Krishna, I have a purpose, I want to serve you, then that will ultimately enable us to go beyond the negative feelings, to tolerate them while they are there, and eventually become elevated to higher level of consciousness where those negative feelings will no longer trouble us that much.
So I’ll summarise what I spoke today. I spoke about how we need to avoid negative feelings in our life, but we have to find the right way to avoid those negative feelings. That is, if normally in our life we spend more energy avoiding negative feelings, avoiding pain, then seeking pleasure.
It’s like I go out of my house, but my main purpose is to avoid this person, avoid this person, I’ll never get to any destination. Then I talked elaborately about how in the material world when people do something which is enjoyable, actually they do it not to feel high, but to stop feeling low. Alcoholic drinks, first it may take them high, but after that, not drinking makes them feel so low that then they drink to feel normal.
When people seek entertainment, they want it for some stimulation and pleasure, but when they get the entertainment, after that, ordinary life feels so boring that then they need entertainment to feel normal. Similarly, with various activities that we do, more often than not, although they are supposed to promise pleasure, but actually we end up doing them simply to avoid feeling pain. We watch entertainment not because we find entertainment so entertaining, but rather because we find life so boring.
And we need to have some higher purpose to life. But unfortunately, the materialistic conception, the very purpose of life is getting pleasant sensations. And when getting pleasant, when that is the purpose, then getting unpleasant sensations is seen as a failure.
And we don’t want to fail. So, say for example, a person is a foodaholic, then their consciousness is restricted to food. And because we can’t eat 24 hours a day, so all the time when they are not eating, they feel bored.
And when they feel bored, to get over that bored feeling, because their consciousness is hooked in food, they’ll eat more and more. So eating is a normal activity, but the psychological tendency to want to avoid negative feeling interferes with it. And either we may eat too much or we may eat too little.
And that way, we discuss that trying to avoid negative feelings has three consequences. First is, we can’t succeed because negative feelings will come some way or the other. No matter how many TV programmes I watch, how many TVs I have to watch, but still, I’ll get bored sometime or the other.
And then when negative feelings come, we feel as if there’s something wrong with us. We are failures. And thirdly, the activities that we do to avoid negative feelings, they decrease the quality of our life.
So what is the solution? That we focus on a higher purpose. Bhagavad Gita explains that we are souls, and the soul is naturally joyful. But the soul’s joyfulness can be experienced at the spiritual level of consciousness.
So we need to have a purpose of not defining pleasure as sensation, but realising pleasure through spiritual realisation. So we focus on connecting with Krishna through the practise of bhakti. And by that connection, gradually, we will rise to a level of consciousness where the unpleasant sensations won’t trouble us so much.
And if we don’t want the unpleasant sensations to trouble us so much, then we also need to be willing to become detached from pleasant sensations. If I delight when India wins, I can’t be detached when India loses. So that’s why, become detached from both and focus on connecting with Krishna.
And while connecting with Krishna, if we get unpleasant sensations, we see them as just a normal part of human life. Just like in a hospital, pain is unavoidable. Pain is a feature of the hospital, not the purpose of the hospital.
Similarly, distress is a feature of the world, not its purpose. And just as a patient who is in a hospital keeps trying to avoid pain, will not be able to take the treatment properly and will eventually, even after taking many, many painkillers, still be in pain or be in worse pain. Similarly, people who simply focus on avoiding pain by taking something like painkillers, entertainment is basically painkillers, they end up in greater pain.
So, within bhakti also, there is a programme. It’s like a doctor has a programme for curative as well as painkilling medicines. Bhakti also has ways in which you can get pleasant sensations.
You get nice prasadam, we have beautiful deities, sweet kirtans. So, there is that pleasant sensation available, but that is not the purpose right now. The purpose is connection with Krishna.
So, while connecting with Krishna, when unpleasant sensations come, what do we do? Just acknowledge them and move on. Just like if you see some unpleasant person, just nod and move on. So, unpleasant emotions will come because that’s a normal part of life.
Just like physical injury can happen, life can also emotionally injure us. So, when we lose someone, there is a natural process of grieving. So, when we are injured, we first rest our injured limb, then we exercise it.
Similarly, while grieving, sometimes we withdraw ourselves in the memory of that person, but then we have to come out and act normally. So, when we go through the normal process of grieving, acknowledging our humanness while also pursuing our spirituality, then eventually as we become more and more connected with Krishna, then we start experiencing higher happiness through absorption in Krishna. The connection in Krishna gives us absorption and that absorption makes us transcendent into both physically pleasant sensations and physically unpleasant sensations.
Thank you very much. Hare Krishna. Are there any questions or comments? Yes, sir.
Sir, you asked me this very basic question that what is the purpose of Krishna creating living entities? And is there any reference in any of the scriptures describing this purpose? What is the purpose of Krishna creating living entities? And going through the process and going back to Him. See, Krishna did not create us. We are eternal with Krishna.
So, nityo nityanam chitnas chitnanam. Krishna is the supreme eternal among many eternals. So, we may use the word creation sometimes, but it is more in a conventional sense rather than the philosophical sense.
What we can say is that for the soul, the bodies are created. The material world is created. The body is created and destroyed.
The material world is manifested and unmanifested. So, creation refers to not the creation of the souls, but creation of the bodies of the souls. That’s the first thing.
Now, the purpose of existence is ānandmayo abhyāsāt. That it is the experience of joy. And the experience of joy comes most fulfillingly through the reciprocation of love.
So, we are made for reciprocating love with Krishna. And there are different souls who are of different natures. Even in the spiritual world, there is variety.
There are different souls who are attracted to different forms of the Lord, who are serving the Lord in different flavours. So, the ultimate purpose of existence is the reciprocation of love. And for us, our stay in the material world is meant for spiritual evolution.
It is meant so that we evolve in our understanding of who we are and what will really lead to happiness. So, as we evolve in wisdom and love, that is, we learn to love Krishna by understanding that He is the supreme and desirable object, then we get more and more happiness in life. So, there is no… We could not… There is no purpose.
Krishna didn’t create us per se. But there is a purpose to our existence. And that purpose is the reciprocation of love.
So, rather than looking at the purpose of creation, we can say purpose of existence. The purpose of existence is the reciprocation of love. And for that reciprocation of love, we need to have the evolution of our consciousness.
And Krishna provides us facilities through the scriptures, through various spiritual avenues, for us to evolve. And thus we can attain Him. Is there a similar evolution in terms of the type of material body a human takes, like from a very low inset, and then to a… Is it similar to Darwin’s, so-called Darwin’s, evolution of consciousness of a living entity, or it could be, from the beginning, it could be a human being, and randomly, based on the phagma, they go through different processes? Okay.
So, when you talk about evolution, spiritual evolution, or evolution of the soul, is it primarily of consciousness from lower body to higher body, or is it Darwinian evolution? So, the Darwinian evolution is primarily talking about the change of bodies over generations. That has… That has nothing to do with spirituality, per se. When you’re talking about spiritual evolution, it is the evolution of the consciousness of the same soul, which goes through different lifetimes, in different bodies.
In 15.8 and 9, Krishna says in the Bhagavad Gita that the soul comes in one body, enjoys according to the modes in that body, and then leaves that body to go to another body. In the next body, based on the kind of conceptions the soul has acquired, it gets a particular set of senses. Eyes, ears, nose, tongue, it’s all centred around the mind.
And then, the soul enjoys the body in that life. So, basically, the soul’s direction, where it will go, is largely determined in the human form. Because in the human form, the soul has free will.
Now, we can say that animals have free will, but their free will is very limited. Their free will is primarily simply to eat this or eat that. Whether to sleep here or sleep there.
That’s all their freedom is. And even that, very little. So, we are accountable in the human form, and the activities that we do in the human life, that will cause us to go through various species.
Now, depending on the kind of desires we have, and the kind of karma that we have done, we may, say, from the human form, we may go to a low species, then come to a high species. Or sometimes we may go to a high species, then from there go to a low species. There’s a particular way in which the results of our karma are meant to be given to us.
The soul gets a body depending on the kind of karma it has done. Under the will of destiny this happens. And eventually the soul comes to the human body, then it has the opportunity to evolve its consciousness and attain Krishna.
Okay? Thank you. Any other questions or comments? Yes, ma’am. Okay.
So, how to maintain balance between our studies and our devotion? Yes, the first principle in maintaining balance is to know that we can’t maintain a steady balance. What that means is sometimes we expect balance to be like a formula. Morning I’ll do this, afternoon I’ll do this, evening I’ll do this.
But, life comes in the way. So therefore, what happens is we go to two extremes. Either I want to micro-control my whole life, and if it doesn’t work, I try to make some plans for every single minute of my day.
And if it doesn’t work, I stop planning entirely. Just give up. No.
It’s a… Planning is more to be done in terms of direction rather than specific action. What I mean by this is, say if I’m riding on a cycle, the normal balance state of cycle is vertical. But if I have to turn right, then the balance state of cycle is tilted.
Now, after I have turned right, if I still stay tilted, then I’ll go round and round in a circle. And after that I have to again become vertical. Then, my purpose was to go here, but there was no road here.
And I went like this. Then when I come here, I will turn left. And then I move on.
So similarly, life requires dynamic balance. So if I think, yes, I’ll just keep my cycle vertical and go to the destination. That will not work, because the buildings will come in the way, the structure of the city will come in the way.
Then we need dynamic balance. Now, I have to shift a little bit this way. Then I have to shift a little bit this way.
So, if we keep an overall understanding, that okay, I want to grow in my bhakti also, and I want to do well in my studies also, or whatever other role I’m in, I have to do well there also. Then, we divide our life in a broad way. Okay, this much time for this, this much time for this.
Broad planning we can have, but within that, there will always be phases, when we may have to do one more. Just like, we have to sometimes tilt the cycle this way. So sometimes when we go for a yatra, or some senior devotees come, at that time, we focus more on spiritual activities.
But say sometimes exams come up, sometimes some co-curricular, extracurricular activities, we have to be a part of. Then at that time, we have to do it more. So, if we have the broad sense of direction, this is where I want to go.
Then, when I need to tilt left, when I need to tilt right, that I will learn. And for this, there has to be some amount of deliberation in the mode of goodness. So, plans usually don’t work.
But, planning usually works. What is the difference between plans and planning? Plans are specific. I’ll do this, this, this, this.
So, plans are about specific actions. Planning is about overall direction. So, yes, you know, in the next six months, I want to read the Bhagavad Gita.
If I read the Bhagavad Gita every day for half an hour, I can easily complete it in six months. But then I have exams. So, the next 15 days I can’t read at all.
Or I may just read one or two minutes. Okay. But this was what I wanted to do.
Then, after my exams are over, I’ll make up and I’ll read more. So, if I have a sense of direction, then even if there’s an interruption, I’ll go along with that, but I’ll come back on track. So, if we can cultivate this overall understanding through the mode of goodness by doing planning, okay, then, even if some deviation happens, we will accept that and come back on track.
We can’t expect that there will be no deviation. Because we are not God. Simply, that’s, we can’t control everything.
We can’t make sure that every single plan gets executed. And, also, whenever a plan gets deviated, then, at that time, we may be a little irritated. That’s understandable.
But after we calm down, then we look back and see, okay, what happened exactly? Maybe I did not anticipate that this would take so much time. Or maybe I overreacted over there. I could have done this.
So, then, when we do this deliberation, we learn from experience. So, we learn more about ourselves. Okay, this needs this much time.
This can be done in this much time. And then we can come more and more towards balance. So, it’s not a rigid formula.
The first thing in planning is that we need to be flexible. Flexible about actions, but firm about our direction. Okay.
Thank you. Great, Krishna. Yes.
Can you explain, like, very nicely, how, like, you know, once one can get caught up in the sense of pleasure, like, and then, you know, like, boredom and all this. So, someone who is, like, caught up in that, like, he doesn’t realise until, like, it’s, until, like, at the end point, like, okay, my life is in a state of, you know, turmoil or something. So, in that process, like, how one can realise in between, like, once he’s hooked up, he or she is hooked up into that, to realise that.
So, if somebody is caught simply in, say, avoiding pain or just seeking some titillation, seeking some entertainment, they don’t realise that they are entrapped like that. So, how can they come out? How they realise or come out? There are broadly externals and internals. Externally, if they meet with some devotees, you don’t do this, you don’t do this, you don’t do this.
What is your life? You feel like that. But if they actually spend some time with devotees, they are happy. Actually, they are happier than me.
So, something is, something is special over here. So, the association with people who are not dependent on the things which they are enjoying and still those people are happy, that forces them to recalibrate their understanding of what is enjoyable. And not just associating with seeing them, but hearing from them.
It’s experiencing something higher or seeing somebody else experiencing something higher. That external experiences can open their paradise. And rather than telling them, you should do this or you should not do this, just let them experience.
And just by their experience, they will start saying, okay. And internally also, the Paramatma, the Supersoul is there in everyone’s heart. Krishna is present.
And everybody goes through phases or at least a few moments in their life. They feel, what am I doing? I was reading, I am hoping to write a book on addiction and spirituality. So, I was reading the narrative about some addicts.
One of the, so I read about this one particular person who was an addict. He was alcoholic and he just, one early morning in America, he got the urge, I want to drink. Went to his fridge, there was no drink with him.
So, he went to the nearby shop, nearby bar. And he was so anxious to go at that time that he forgot to wear any warm clothes, it’s very cold. He ran into his car and went.
And in that bar, the particular kind of alcohol he wanted was not there. So, he went to the other end of the town. And he was going to the other end of the town.
His car broke down. So, now without any warm clothes, he just got out of the car and ran to the bar. And he ran to the bar, finally he got the drink.
It’s about to drink, he said. He drank a gulp and then he said, no. I spent so much time.
I will enjoy this drink. And he was going back to his car. And suddenly on the snow, there was snow, he slipped.
And he had not fixed the lid properly when he had drunk it. So, what happened? All the alcohol fell on him. He was lying in the cold, in snow, in all the buildings around.
Everybody was so sleepy. He said, what am I doing? What am I doing? At that time, he said, it struck me. I am enslaved.
I am trapped. So, that was the beginning of his awakening. Then, of course, it’s a long process to become free.
But the point is that even people who are hooked to something, they have their moments of awakening. Now, if we have helped them see a way, they may not feel like taking the way, but if we just show them a way, yeah, this is a different way of living. Maybe this is good.
Then if that memory stays with them, and then by Krishna’s arrangement, a moment of awakening happens in their life. Then that moment of awakening, coupled with their experience of devotion, that will make them look for something higher. But if we try to force them too much, they will just clamp down.
And then even if the moment of awakening happens, they will not get awakened. They will again find something else to do at a similar level and stay trapped. So, we try to give them positive experiences of something higher in life by bringing them in association as much as possible.
Or take the association to them, give them some spiritual music, give them some nice prasadam, whatever. Give them some connection with Krishna. And even if they don’t take up, just keep the door open.
Be cordial and let the moment of awakening come in their life. Okay? Thank you. Yes.
Kind of a stupid question. Like, previously I thought like, when things happen in your life, they are meant to have some reason. Like when you go through some bad things, it’s going to actually make you think that it helps you think whether you should, are you spiritually inclined or not, whether you can progress in spirituality.
So what I’m actually trying to understand here is about the karma concept. So, when, based on your desire at the end of your life, you acquire some form, like animal form or any. So, I’m thinking like, what’s the purpose of that? It’s just based on what you did, the actions is revealing, that’s why you have to go through it.
Or it’s something in the animal form also, you’re trying to realise that, well, these are the mistakes I did because of this consciousness. I got this body and that’s the reason why I got it. So, is it that in the animal form, there is some learning that happens for the soul? Generally, the animal forms are more for exhaustion of karma and for gratification of desires.
That means, Prabhupada will give the example, if somebody in the human form likes to eat too much meat, the human body is not suited for that. Then they may get a body with fangs, a lion’s body, a tiger’s body, a wolf’s body, whatever. So, that is a facility for them to fulfil the particular desire that they have.
Along with that, there is some exhaustion of karma. So, if we have done, karma cannot be mathematically calculated, but just as a concept. If we have done, say, 100 units of karma, then some 30 units of it may be exhausted in the non-human bodies.
Some 30 units may be in lower planets, hellish planets. Some remaining 40 units may be in a future human body. So, even in the animal body, different animals live differently.
There can be a street dog who is exhausting a lot of bad karma and there can be a pet dog who is actually exhausting good karma. Living in comfort. So, the animal body is also exhausting karma and the animal body is also a facility for fulfilling desires.
Now, as far as learning is concerned, in general, learning is possible when there is the capacity to choose in a significant way. In general, if we see the graph of various species versus their behaviour. So, in the animal species, most of their behaviour is based on their inherited characteristics.
An ant can construct an ant hive Can I have some warm water? An ant can construct an ant hill much much better than what an ordinary human being can construct a house. But, human beings can construct many different kinds of houses. They can innovate and learn, but ants more or less keep constructing the same kind of houses.
Cows eat grass. We human beings create hundreds of cuisines. So, the point which I am making over here is that in the animal species, the inherited characteristics are much much more.
Their behaviour is based largely on what they have learned through inheritance, through their genes. Their acquired learning, their inherited knowledge and acquired knowledge. The acquired knowledge is relatively speaking very little.
Learning spiritual lessons is primarily acquired through experience. The soul has a normal spiritual inclination, but that is covered by the conditioning. So, that capacity to learn spiritual lessons is not much present in animal bodies.
However, there is an exception if a soul who has been a human body and has practised bhakti in a human body then descends to an animal body. It happened to Bharat Maharaj who became a deer. Then some learning is possible in those bodies.
But normally animal bodies are more for exhausting karma and fulfilling desires, not so much for learning spiritual lessons. So, when they have fulfilled these kinds of desires, does that mean that in the next life they are not with the same desires or is it chance of having the same kind of desires again? So, if a soul’s particular desire is fulfilled in a particular animal body and does that mean that they will no longer have that desire in the next body? Not exactly not have that desire entirely, but not have that desire in that prominent magnitude. There is a natural desire to eat food, but what kind of food they will eat that will depend on the kind of body they have.
So, there is a strong opposition with a particular kind of food, with meat for animal body, which is a carnivorous animal. But if it goes to some other body, there will still be a desire for food, but that kind of craving will not be there. Thank you.
So, last question. So, if somebody says, I don’t want to do this service because I don’t like that person, I think I am doing the service. You can tell them, you are going to get the credit of doing two services.
How? Because doing that service and being with that person is also service. Yeah. So, he said that some people bring happiness wherever they go.
And then? Some people bring happiness wherever they go. Yeah. Some people working with them, it’s an austerity.
With some people, working with them is a joy. So, we have to see that. Naturally, we all will want to work with people with whom it’s a joy to work.
So, and if we can get that, that’s good. But at the same time, the nature of life is, we will have to interact with different kinds of people. So, sometimes the service requires that kind of interaction.
We should see that it’s also an opportunity for purification. It’s also an opportunity for growth. Krishna is in the hearts of everyone.
Krishna sees what we are going through. And Krishna appreciates that. Krishna helps us to grow.
When Krishna brought one Parijat flower for Rukmini, and then Satyamaha demanded an entire tree. And then when Krishna came back to Rukmini, she was thinking that Rukmini will demand something more. But she did not demand anything.
And Krishna was very pleased by that. Krishna acknowledged that. So, Krishna knows what the devotee is going through.
So, if some devotee is, if we find it difficult to deal with some devotee, then Krishna also knows that. So, if, still we do that service, then that indicates that we are ready to tolerate inconvenience for Krishna’s sake. And that will please Krishna.
So, we can, that’s why I said, serving, doing that particular service is a service. But serving with that person is also service. And we will make spiritual advancement, not just by doing that service, but also by being with that person and doing that service.
Having said that, this is from the individual’s perspective. They should be willing to do a service and they can be appropriately inspired. But at the same time, from the community leader’s perspective, we also have to know that we want people to be happily engaged in Bhakti.
So, that means, it’s not that, you know, we give people services which make them miserable and tell them, you are meant to be happy in Bhakti. It’s not like that. It’s our responsibility also.
Bhakti is susukham, but it’s also the responsibility of those who are sharing Bhakti to make the experience of Bhakti susukham. So, we try to engage people in a way that they can work harmoniously with each other as much as possible. And we don’t demand too much from people.
So, at the very least, what should happen is that if somebody has to work with someone who is unpleasant or working with some people just takes away our energy. You know, it’s like when we are working with them, it’s like we are walking through a landmine. You know, what will cause what explosion? We don’t know.
So, we just have to be so tense all the time, so alert. So, then working with some people takes energy. And if that is happening, then we also need some people by being with whom we get energy.
So, if all the kind of people whom we are with are just people who take away our energy, then we’ll become exhausted. We’ll become depressed. We’ll become irritated.
We’ll not be able to function. So, we need to have some people at least whose association is alive with us. So, if somebody is like that, say if that devotee is inspired by us, but we tell them to serve with this person, then they may do that, but then we also have to make time to spend with them so they feel valued.
They will get strength through that association. So, we need to be willing to extend our capacity by tolerating inconveniences as individuals. By the same time, because we are finite living beings, so our capacity to tolerate inconveniences also is finite.
And if that capacity gets exceeded, then we just overreact. So, therefore, it has to be with a mature discussion between both the devotee offering the service and the devotee rendering the service. And then they can be engaged in a way that is both serving the purpose of the community as well as serving the purpose of the individual.
Sometimes it may have to go more this way where the community needs to take priority and the individual sacrifices. But sometimes it may go the other way. The individual does what they want to do and the community needs are adjusted.
Overall, we strive for harmony. Is the answer to your question? So, thank you very much. Shila Prabhupada Ki Gaur Bhakt Bindaki Jai Jai Jai