If I feel fearful because others keep reminding me of my past mistakes what to do?

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
mistakes and that creates turbulence and fearfulness. How to deal with that? Yes, as I said there are some people who hold the past as a tool for beating people in the present.
Now, it’s understandable that if I have made some mistake, the other person was say troubled by that mistake and the other person may not trust me right now. That’s understandable. But, if that person is holding on to the past and because you did like that at that time, that’s how you are now.
We have to see in a particular relationship, how is that relationship affecting us. If some people are, their presence is bringing out our lower side, then we may have to create some distance. Distance may not just be physical, it’s more of emotional.
I won’t take this person’s remarks so seriously. For that, we need to have some other people who validate us. Validate doesn’t necessarily mean they approve everything that we say, everything that we say or do.
They also guide us to improve. But, the important thing is that we try to learn from our past mistakes, but we don’t want to live in the past lamenting about the mistakes of the past. If some people are having that more, then they are caught in the past and they are trying to keep us in the past.
Sometimes, some things may have hurt someone so badly that for them, it may be difficult to get over it. But then, that does not mean we have to let them hold it on us. That means, even if somebody’s anger is because of our past actions, if they are holding on to that anger, that means it is their issue.
It’s not our issue. There are, in life, when things happen, there are causes and there are triggers. Trigger is what makes a particular thing happen.
It’s like, say, this is a home and this is a college and there is a student who passes by and in between there is a bar. Now, if there are two students, one of them has drunk a few times, the other has never drunk. And the student who passes by the bar, who has drunk, as soon as he passes by, there is a desire to come, let me drink, let me drink.
The other student passes by, there is no desire over there. So now, the bar is not the cause of that desire to drink. The bar is the trigger.
The cause is the craving that has already been created. The attachment has already been created by past indulgence. So now, for some people, certain actions become triggers.
Oh, you did like that and that’s why I feel angry, that’s why I’m angry with you. But, okay, so our mistake from the past is the trigger for them. But it is not the cause.
The cause is within them. The cause is that they are still obsessed with the past. Krishna says that, He says that the mentality which holds on to past wrong, which is habitually morose, habitually negative, that mentality is in the mood of ignorance.
So, we should see, although they are blaming us, we are simply the triggers. The cause, the issue is within them. Their mind is negatively directed constantly.
So, we don’t take it personally and we move on. So, if we can’t keep too much of a distance with such people in our lives, then we should focus more on trying to connect with people who bring positivity in our lives, who encourage us. And that will help us to counter whatever negativity these people bring in our life.