If others don’t accept something we are strongly convinced about, what should we do?
Answer Podcast
Transcript
This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
If you try to convince others based on something which you feel very strongly, but others don’t accept, then what do we do? na buddhi-bhedam janayet ajnanam karma-sanginam joshyet sarva-karmani vidvānyukta-samācāraṇam So Krishna says in 3.26 in the Bhagavad Gita that na buddhi-bhedam janayet Don’t disturb the minds of the less intelligent people. ajnanam karma-sanginam If people are attached to certain conceptions, don’t disturb their mind.
joshyet sarva-karmani Engage them in a way that they can become elevated gradually. vidvānyukta-samācāraṇam This is the way that wise people act. That means that we may not always be able to convince others about what we feel is right.
There are many reasons. One is that we ourselves may not be right sometimes. In the situation when we are right, that may not be the right time for others to accept that.
So sometimes some people have to learn by their own way. So, even Krishna doesn’t force us to do anything. He also has given us freedom.
We are certainly not more powerful than Krishna. So if Krishna doesn’t force anyone, how can we force anyone? So we can only basically do three things for people. We can share knowledge.
We can provide facilities. And we can set an example. That means, say, if you are a parent and you are a mother and you have a child.
The child is going off in a wrong direction. When the child is small, the mother can tell, do this, don’t do this. But the child grows up into a teenager and then they become a youth.
Then the parents can’t force much. So what can the parents do? The parents can share knowledge. If you do this, this is going to happen.
Your friends may tell you, come to a party, take drinks, take drugs. But know what are the consequences of that. Share knowledge.
Let’s give you an extreme example over here. Share knowledge, then provide facilities. Now if you want our children to come towards bhakti, then they cannot come and be happy in a satsang where there are adults.
They need some forum where there are children together of their age and they can do some activities together, some drama, some outing, some fun in spiritual association. So we have to provide facilities for them and then set an example. So if I tell others to do something and then I am myself not doing it, then people won’t accept it.
So in general, we have to know that we can’t we can’t control others. We can try to convey what we feel is best for them and to give force to that conviction, we can give knowledge, provide facilities and set example. And beyond that, what we should not do is, if it’s an important relationship for us, then because of that difference, we should not spoil that relationship.
Because even if we are right and they are wrong, if we spoil that relationship, if we make that into an ego issue, I am right and you are wrong and why are you not doing this? One day you will learn that I am right and you will come crawling on your knees back to me. If we make it like that, we may not speak in that blunt words, but if we do like that, then what happens? Eventually, even when they realize they are wrong, but because their ego has been hurt, they will not come back. So in general, even if people go on the wrong path, we convey our displeasure, we convey our disappointment at what they are doing, but we don’t spoil the relationship.
If somebody is going very wrong, then we may have to create some distance in that relationship for our protection, for what are the practical details. But in principle, we cannot control others. We can only inspire others.
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