If someone chants a lot of rounds but doesn’t behave properly with their spouse how do we understand?

Transcript

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He is chanting a lot of rounds. But then, he is not behaving properly with the spouse. Actually, see, there are three different factors over here.
One is, if they are chanting sincerely, that will lead to advancement. No, that will lead to advancement. But whether that advancement will necessarily manifest in a better relationship with someone, that may not be so.
Because, sometimes, different people have different natures. And sometimes, two people just may not be able to work together. That’s just the way people are.
So, we shouldn’t automatically assume that chanting a lot will set all material things right. See, sometimes we see relationships as entirely dependent on human adjustment. See, just like, I may chant 192 rounds, but if I have got, say, some heart problem, that is not going to go away.
That is, Adhyatmik klesh. I may chant 192 rounds, but that doesn’t mean that, say, the hurricane will go away, or hurricane will not trouble me. Similarly, Adhibhautik klesh is one klesh.
Just as Adhyatmik and Adhidaivik klesh may not necessarily go away because of chanting, similarly, Adhidaivik klesh may also not go away. Now, in that sense, we shouldn’t necessarily expect that chanting will necessarily solve a particular material problem. The problem of material existence in terms of attachment to material contents, that will gradually be solved by chanting.
But sometimes, specific problems may remain. That is the first thing. Second thing is that some devotees somehow think that the spiritual and the material are interchangeable.
See, I may chant 192 rounds, but if I don’t wake up and brush my teeth and chant, the bad breath is not going to go away by my chanting. And chanting is not meant for removing bad breath. There is a simple toothpaste for that.
So, sometimes, for dealing with relationships, some material skills are required. Learning a particular way to talk. We may call it material, we may call it cultural, we may call it spiritual, whatever.
But certain things other than chanting may be required for reconciling that relationship. So, if there is not proper philosophical understanding, then one may expect that if I am chanting, everything will be solved. And one may become reluctant to learn other things.
One may be reluctant to apply oneself to other means for problem-solution. See, what is going to happen is, ultimately, although Chaitanya Kriya Yoga Dharma, Rupa Goswami is very inclusive, says, ye na ke na prakar na mana krishna niveshe. Somehow or the other, fix the mind on Krishna.
So, the idea is that, sometimes we may fix up by chanting, sometimes we fix up by something else, fix the mind by something else. So, if my relationship with my spouse is very disturbed, then even I am chanting 192 rounds, but how much am I really thinking about Krishna? And how much is my thinking devotional? That’s the question. So, we should see that this kind of other skills or abilities, they can also aid me in fixing my mind on Krishna.
It’s like if I am in pain, then I take a painkiller, then I may be able to fix my mind on Krishna, but otherwise I am just thinking of the pain so much. So, just as we don’t see the medicine as a competitor to Krishna, see, medicine has its place and Krishna has its place. But similarly, learning some relational skills or whatever is required, that we should not see that as a competitor to Krishna.
Unfortunately, some people see that and that becomes a problem. And third thing is that, sometimes, some people are not, actually in a sense, devoting oneself to Krishna requires humility. But practicing a particular activity in bhakti, in a very large way, that may actually titillate the ego.
On the other hand, reconciling with someone may require me to humble my ego. So, in a sense, chanting 192 rounds may be easier than humbling myself. Although chanting myself, now we shouldn’t assume this about some devotee, but I am saying that it’s just a possibility.
So, if we are in a position to explain to that devotee, that’s well and good. If we are not, then we can try to contact some senior devotee and let them see if they can help. Otherwise, we have to see that material things will have to be resolved in their material way.
So, it’s not necessarily a deficiency in bhakti, it is just a lack of understanding of what is the potency of bhakti. So, sometimes if we misunderstand that, then we may not do what is required for solving the problems. So, I feel if we don’t have any praying practically, we can just pray to Krishna and try to help it resolve any issue.