​If something works for us but doesn’t work for others should we apologize for misguiding them?

Answer Podcast

Transcript

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so somebody has a problem and we share with them something that acts as a solution for us but when it doesn’t work for them they start being resentful for us so should we ask for forgiveness and what should we do in that situation? yes, the shoe that fits one person bites another person the shoe that fits one leg, different people have different leg sizes so like that, I remember this happened with me whenever I go in front of the deities I always recite some verses and by reciting the verses, by meditating on the verses I think this is the same law manifested over here so I feel connected you can also memorize verses and you can pray to the deities after a few days he came back he told me time to recollect the words that causes me so much tension whatever bhakti is there it goes away so whatever is a conducive spiritual stimuli for me may not be for them therefore there are principles and there are practices the principles are universal the practices are specific, they are individual so when we are prescribing to people also we are telling something, if we are in a position to guide others we should tell the principle but the practice that has to be something which has to be individually adapted so if we insist on certain specific practices only like some devotees may chant 64 rounds that is very good but others may find that 64 rounds I can’t concentrate at all others can serve in other ways it is not necessary that just chanting 64 rounds is good or not chanting 64 rounds is good it varies, different people have different ways in which they can connect with Krishna so when we are guiding others and a very important principle is to invoke in them a sense of responsibility for their spiritual growth ultimately every individual’s spiritual growth is their own responsibility when they blame others for something which we did work in their life it is as if they are holding us responsible for what has happened in their life and while guiding itself we have to be very clear it’s your life, it’s your choice I am as an aid but it’s up to you to do this Krishna doesn’t say I am God, you follow me he says deliberate deeply and then you decide what you want to do so taking responsibility for one’s spiritual life also means that we have to evaluate what works in our life we have to ourselves find what is it that attracts us towards Krishna Rupa Goswami Bhaktiraswamy Siddhu calls this as Uddhipan Uddhipan means spiritual stimulus so that which stimulates our thoughts towards Krishna that which triggers devotional emotions within us what is the Uddhipan for me may be different from what is the Uddhipan for you so rather than telling that you just do this thing we can encourage people to take inventory of their heart and find out what is it by which they can connect with Krishna find out their Uddhipan and then by that they can connect with Krishna so we say Yena Kena Prakar Yena Mana Krishna Nilesh somehow or other fix the mind on Krishna what does somehow or the other mean here somehow or the other means that the different people will be able to fix their mind on Krishna in different ways so we have to encourage people to find that out we can also observe them, you can do this nicely you are good at this and we can try to encourage them accordingly but essentially it is every individual’s responsibility and yes if they felt that their time got wasted we can definitely seek forgiveness but we can also give a proper explanation this worked for me and that’s what I thought it will work if it is not working that’s fine you can try what works for you and if you need any assistance from me I am there to assist we can ask for forgiveness because yes they had some faith, they had some trust because of which they came to us and when they asked something it didn’t work but it’s not that we have to dig ourselves into a hole for that it’s a practical process and the whole process of Bhakti involves not just surrender to authority which is important but it also involves taking individual responsibility even when a patient goes to a doctor the patient has to follow the doctor’s prescription but at the same time the patient also has to observe oneself ultimately we all have to become our own doctors we have to understand this works for me, this doesn’t work for me this is good for me, this is not good for me we of course take guidance from the spiritual master but we also have to cultivate individual responsibility does it answer your question? yes