If the chidren of devotees don’t become devotees, then does the devotee-parents’ duty of caring for their chilldren no longer count as devotional service?

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Hare Krishna question if as devotee parents we raise our children properly as a devotional service to Krishna but those children don’t become devotees when they grow up then is the is the duty of having taken care of the children not devotional service or is it devotional service? answer the point of whether something is devotional service or not is not the result of that service the point of that is our intentions so Shri Prabhupada himself served Krishna for 14 years in India by preaching and not many people became devotees by that does that mean that what Prabhupada was doing was not devotional service you may say Prabhupada is a pure devotee and we are not, that is true but the principle here we are not talking about we are talking about whether the results determine if something is devotional service or not no it’s not the results it’s the intention so yes we may not have pure intention there is a difference between when we are preaching and when we are taking care of our children when taking care of children the material emotions can come in much more naturally because our children are related to us by blood but then also the point is taking care of children is also a duty, it’s aparadharma so we have to understand that there is aparadharma and there is paradharma there is material religion which is also important but not all important and paradharma is transcendental religion so the ideal situation is when the paradharma helps us in aparadharma helps us in paradharma aparadharma is our duty to our family members race, nation like that and paradharma is the duty to our duty to Krishna so now when we are taking care of children see aparadharma is important the parents don’t take care of children what kind of society are we going to have so aparadharma has to be practiced I am talking about society not just about devotee community but about the overall community in the larger world also overall society also beyond the devotee community parents need to take care of children and that is important so now when there are devotee parents then they will also try to give devotional samskaras and that is that is an integration of aparadharma and paradharma together that is the best, now at the same time we understand that every soul has free will and some souls may choose to serve Krishna some souls may not choose to serve Krishna we will see that even Bhakti Sahasrara was such a great spiritual master Srila Prabhupada was Shaktyavisha avatar such a great spiritual master but even some of their disciples fell away in fact they took initiation and after that they fell away so does this mean that they as spiritual masters were failures that whatever they did that was not devotional obviously not when we are trying to share Krishna consciousness with others there are two aspects one is our use of our free will and the other is their use of their free will so what ensures our spiritual advancement is our proper use of our free will and what will ensure others spiritual advancement is their proper use of their free will so now if the children don’t become devotees then that means they have used their free will in a particular way by which they will not become devotees certainly that will sadden our heart and that is understandable and we can try to do whatever is possible for us to help those children come to Krishna but at the same time we shouldn’t firstly consider that whatever we did for raising them was futile because they did not become devotees because even if it is not aparadharma even if it is not devotional service still it is aparadharma and aparadharma is also important as parents they have to be there for the children so the parents love for the children has to be in many ways unconditional we should love the children irrespective of whether they become devotees or not and now is that mundane? not necessarily it is a part of aparadharma we can be insensitive and reject that as mundane or we can be more sensitive and recognize that it is a part of varanashram and varanashram is ideal when it is daivi varanashram and everything is connected with Krishna but even when it is not still it is important for maintaining the material social order so we have done our duty and we can always introspect and try to learn and see what was it that we could have done better whether we could have done something by which we could have raised the children and helped them to become devotees we can all find room for improvement and whatever we find we can seek forgiveness from Krishna and try to do better in future but what Krishna sees is our intention our intention if we have tried to serve Krishna sincerely then naturally we are going to make spiritual advancement by that and irrespective of whether the children become devotees or not we are going to make spiritual advancement so karmanyeva adhikaaraste ma phaleshu gadaachin Krishna says in Bhagavad Gita 2.47 that actually we have to serve the devotees it is our duty to do our work but we do not have right to the result so this applies even as a devotional role you know as they say as teachers of Bhagavad Gita we may give classes but sometimes people may not take up Krishna consciousness by that so we cannot demand it because I am doing this service to Krishna so the results have to come even if the results don’t come still what we are doing is devotional service now even in our devotional life even when we are doing devotional activities such as sharing Krishna consciousness for most of us the material motive will come up we may want some praise some glorification, some fame now when we want that does it mean that that is not devotional service not necessarily it simply means that it is not pure devotional service which is fine we are aspiring for pure devotional service but we have to be honest and know that right now we are not in the pure devotional platform but at least we should be in the devotional platform and have a devotional intention and try to make that devotional intention as much as possible at the center of all our activities whether they are directly devotional or indirectly devotional so you know we should be when we are taking care of our children what we should be focusing on is how can I best help them materially and spiritually we should be thinking that whether what I am doing is devotional service or not that kind of analysis will often make us very hamstrung in the natural expression of love which is essential for the children to feel love and to grow up feeling love so it’s important for us to be there when our children need us and we shouldn’t at that time worry too much whether it is mundane or whether it is spiritual what we should focus on is that we set the best possible example for them so one example that we have set is that we are serious devotees and we practice devotional service seriously at the same time another example that we also set is that we are there as parents for the children when they need them and if we are doing these things then whatever we are doing is a part of our devotional service and it will not be judged by whether the children become devotees or not, if children become devotees that is wonderful, if they don’t become devotees still we have done our duty and we will be making spiritual advancement to the extent that we have done our duty but in general when we are doing our duty our focus should be not so much on our own spiritual advancement but on rendering the best possible service you know if a preacher is giving class and a preacher thinks if I quote many shlokas I am in contact with Sanskrit Bhagavatam verses and that will lead to more spiritual advancement so the person just quotes shlokas and shlokas and doesn’t give any understanding to people now is he doing is the teacher doing service properly over there now that quoting shlokas whether it leads to purification or whether it leads to inflation of the ego of the person we don’t know and whether people are benefited it’s very unlikely so generally when we are doing a service our focus should be on how can I do this service best our focus should not be whether I am making spiritual advancement or not as Bhakti Svansthit don’t try to see God try to serve God in such a way that he wants to see you so if we are doing our service well and service well doesn’t necessarily mean the results have to come service well doing service well means that we offer the best possible contribution that we can offer in the service that we do it in the best possible capacity with the best possible intentions then we will definitely make spiritual advancement a natural result thank you Hare Krishna