Lessons from Hanuman’s devotion to Rama 2 – Earning trust through emotional intelligence
[Congregation program at Phoenix, USA]
Transcription of Lecture:
Lessons from Hanuman’s devotion to Rama 2 – Earning trust through emotional intelligence.
Since tomorrow is Ramnavami I will be talking about some incidents and lessons from the Ramayana, and I will be speaking about the theme of Hanuman’s devotion to Ram, and what we can learn from that.
Yesterday evening I talked about how Hanuman was able to bring about the union between Ram and Sugriva, and today I will move forwards from there. If you consider the Ramayana, the section of the Ramayana where Hanuman appears is the Kiskinda Kanda. That is the time when he appears, and then he comes into his own in the Sundara Kanda.
The word Sundara has many different significance’s; if you consider all the other sections of the Ramayana they are either describing the events there or the location. E.g. there is the Bala Kanda which describes the childhood activities of Ram. The Ayodha Kanda describes the activities in Ayodhya, the Aranya Kanda describes what happened in the forest; the yudha Kanda describes the activities in the warfield; the Uttara Kanda is the final Kanda. The kiskinda kanda is the geographical location. The sundara kanda is the only kanda that either seems to be related with activity directly or the place. The Acharyas have given different meanings for this. Sundara refers to one of the names that Hanuman was given because he was a very attractive child. Another understanding is that actually it is permeated with the beauty of devotion, and in fact this is the only kanda in the whole Ramayana where Ram is present the minimum. In fact the Kanda begins with Ram seeing Hanuman off, and the whole kanda is about the search of Sita where Ram is not present, and then Hanuman jumps across Lanka, goes there and finds Sita, does heroic adventures over there and then he
returns, and then when he returns he unites with Ram, and that is where the role of Ram directly comes at the beginning and at the end, and yet the Lord’s presence is felt actually the most in this kand.
It is said that Lord Ram sent Vanaraduta; he sent messengers who are out to search for Sita. That what he sends; and then as the vanaras were going out what did Kapivara? Kapivara means that among the monkeys they were the best and the foremost, and they were constantly remembering him. This is described in the Nam-Ramayana which is one hundred and eight names of Ram which describes chronologically the full Ramayana.
Like sometimes when students don’t study for the exam, then there is the crash course; just do this and pass the exam. So, it is said that if you can’t recite the whole Ramayana, just do the crash course by reciting the one hundred and eight names of Ram in the Nam-Ramayana, and get the benefit of reciting the Ramayana. So, each name is related to one particular pastime.
In this particular kanda of the Ramayana there is basically the presence of Ram in the absence of Ram. The presence of Ram is in his remembrance. The presence of Ram in the absence of Ram is in his remembrance. So, they were always remembering him, and the height of this emotion of recollection and separation comes when Ram is recollected in the discussion between Sita and Ram. That time there are two great devotees of Ram: the consort of Ram and the servant of Ram; both of them are separated from Ram, and both of them are remembering him very intensely.
The dramatic climax of the Ramaya will come in the next kanda where there is the yudha that is going to happen, but the emotional climax in one sense comes over here because there is the intense remembrance by
both of them. We will go towards that in due course, but here let’s focus on the situation that starts off this incident.
Hanuman is a powerful vanara, but he is not considered the foremost of the vanaras. Bali had been the king earlier, and Sugriva had been his assistant and Hanuman was one of the assistants of Sugriva who had been exiled, or rather who had fled for his life, and was living in exile. At that time Hanuman is resourceful and he is intelligent, but he has not done anything spectacular till then.
Among all the vanaras Ram meets Hanuman first, and it is Hanuman who introduces him to Sugriva, and in that sense among all the vanaras, just simply for the fact that, for the first meeting Hanuman has special place for Ram, but it is not just because of the first meeting; it is also because of the great devotion that Hanuman has, and not just because of the great devotion; as we will see eventually see he has great prowess, great heroism and great courage. But before that when Ram is departing, Ram is arranging for the armies or for the divisions of the monkeys to go in four different directions. So, Sugriva is arranging and Ram is overseeing it all. At that time Angad is made the head of the division that is going Southwards, and Ram at that time calls Hanuman. Hanuman is going there as an assistant. When Hanuman goes there as an assistant, at that time Ram singles out Hanuman and he tells him to go. Sampatti saw Ravana going in the southern direction; even Jatayu had said that actually he is going in the southern direction.
In the Ramayana there are many characters who are actually brothers. Bali and Sugriva are brothers; Sampatti and Jatayu are brothers. Sampatti and Jatayu don’t meet each other once they are separated, but they both meet in the service of the Lord. Jatayu lays down his life serving for the Lord, and Sampatti actually in a sense gains his life back
by serving the Lord. He has been immobilized because he had lost his wings.
When Jatayu and Sampatti were flying high to sky, they had their young blood in an adventurous spirit. They wanted to go to the sun, and then normally when both of them started going up; both of them had the adventurous spirit; but still because Sampatti was older among the two he had some responsibilities also. When he saw that the heat was too much he covered Jatayu with his wings in order to shield him; the result was that his wings got burned. It is interesting that for both the birds something similar happened; they both lost their wings. So, Sampatti lost his wings in trying to protect Jatayu, and Jatayu lost his wings in trying to protect Sita. Now for every living being there is some particular feature of the body which is vitally important. So, each living being has his defining feature. So, for the birds it is primarily their wings. That is what enables them to fly. To lose the wings signifies the greatest loss practically speaking. So, Jatayu loses his wings before he loses his life. That means that he keeps fighting till he loses everything, and ultimately he loses his life. But for Sampatti, his wings had been lost, but whenever he fulfills his service; he tells the Vanaras later that actually Ravana had gone that side.
This whole incident will come later, but I am just drawing a correlation over here to illustrate a point that at that time his wings come back, and then he flies away, and he attains elevation. At this time Jatayu has told that they had gone towards the Southern direction, and Sugriva and the monkeys had also seen the monkeys go in the Southern direction. So, Ram tells Hanuman that it is the party that is going in the South that is most likely to find Sita, and Ram says, If you find her; I will like to give you a symbol that you are my authorized representatives, and through
that she will recognize you, and she will accept you as someone who has genuinely come from me. So, this is both an act of trust and an act of preparation in the sense that he is preparing Hanuman. We will later know about how Hanuman wins the trust of Sita. That is very significant for us to understand how relationships work, and how we can build trust and relationships. But at this stage it is Ram who is expressing trust in Hanuman, and he is also preparing Hanuman for the eventual situation that he is going to encounter.
The human mind works in different ways in different situations. When we are entrusted with some responsibility, sometimes the mind may interpret the responsibility as a burden, but sometimes the mind may interpret that as, “Oh you trust me I can do this! Yes, I will try my best.” So, sometimes the trust that is reposed; the expectation that is put can inspire and sometimes can burden.
We all live in a relational world where every relationship means that there is some contribution that is made, and there is some expectation that is 12.41? (inaudible) So, in a relationship if somebody has too much expectation and they make too little contributions, then the relationship starts getting strained. If we expect people to do a lot and we don’t do even one thing that they want us to do, then they will say, “Why should I do all these things?” So, every relationship is based on reciprocation.
Now for Ram, he is offering this symbol of trust to Hanuman and Hanuman is overwhelmed with gratitude that Ram is specially trusting him and entrusting him. By entrusting he is showing his trust for him, and Hanuman feels enlivened that the whole party goes off at that time, and they meet with various dangers at different times, and they go through all those dangers. And finally Hanuman is the only person who
is capable of jumping across the ocean to get to Lanka, and he jumps through; all that is also great adventure. We will focus on the theme of the Sundara Kanda which is the presence of Ram and the absence of Ram.
We will just focus right now on the theme that he just so heroically and fearlessly goes over all obstacles. It is the journey that is difficult; sometimes we go through a very difficult journey to meet someone and then they are there to welcome us. It is nice that at the end of journey there is somebody who loves and welcomes us. But here after a long journey there is no welcome, but there is suspicious. So, it is after the journey ends, another bigger challenge begins actually. Srila Prabhupada’s journey was like that. Coming to America was very difficult singlehandedly, but after coming there was no welcoming party; there was absolutely no one he had. He had to make everything on his own. So, that was quite difficult for him when he after some great effort finally finds Sita. But even after finding Sita that is not enough. Sita has never met him; Sita doesn’t even know who she is. At least in this particular lila.
They are all eternal associates, but when the Lord descends to the world, at that time most of associates act as if they are normal human beings, and so in that case that’s why they have never met. So, Hanuman is a majestic warrior, but he is a very purposeful warrior. He enters into Lanka and sneaks around and finally comes to the Ashoka Vatika which is Ravana’s favorite garden, and that’s where he has kept Sita. And Ravana himself comes again and again to try to tempt Sita. In trying to pressurize Sita he uses what is called as the good cop-bad cop strategy. Good cop-bad cop strategy is that, if there is prisoner whom the police want to confess, what they do is, there is one cop who comes in and acts
as a bad cop. He will threaten, beat and abuse saying, “You will be destroyed if you do this.” And then after this person has beaten, threatened and tormented him, the good cop comes along and says, “It is such a terrible thing. If I had known I would have stopped but I was not here. But he is also doing his job. I will ensure that he doesn’t do this again, but you also have to help me. You reveal something.” So, they both come together and they weaken the person.
Those who are in criminology they say that if you are always good or if you are always bad it doesn’t work as effectively as it would work if you are alternatively good or bad. So, Ravana when he would come he would promise, “You can be my chief queen. All the opulence of Lanka can be for yours.” And then he had all these demonesses with him who are guarding Sita, and they would threaten her; some of them had the job of threatening her, “If you don’t succumb to Ravana you will be ruined and you will be destroyed. Ram will never come. Ram must already be dead also.” And there are others who will allure her. Ravana himself will sometimes tempt and sometimes threaten. Hanuman was sitting on a tree and observing all these. He was very intelligent. Because of his intelligence he could see one thing and perceive everything that was happening.
Hanuman could see that this is Sita, and could see that she was very apprehensive. She had pulled her body very close to her pulling her legs also, just trying to create as much distance as possible from Ravana, and he could see the fear and disgust on Sita’s face and he felt appalled. At that same time he didn’t want his presence to be detected. So, he just waited.
Ravana finished his whole succession of threatening her or tempting her. Ravana, what he would do is, every night when he would sleep, after
waking up the first thing he would remember Sita, and he would go to Sita. He would try to tempt her or threaten her, and when he would not succeed he would go back. So, Hanuman had been searching all over Lanka at night. He had started from the coast line in the morning. He had travelled all day and he had reached Lanka. Eventually by using the cover of night he had searched, and by the time he had found Ashoka Vatika it was morning. It was early morning and Ravana had just come in. Actually Ravana had just come by the tree where Hanuman was sitting. But Ravana was so caught in his infatuation of Sita that he didn’t notice anything out of place. Even if he had noticed he thought that there was another monkey over there. Then Hanuman came closer to Sita, and when he came close at that time he started thinking, “How do I approach her?” Then he found a solution. He said that the best way to do is – the rakshashis had been tempting and threatening her, but finally they had went a little distance from her so that they could do their own thing. So, Sita was a little bit alone at that time. They were still guarding, but they gave her a little privacy. So, they had threatened her and left her alone to think. Then at that time Hanuman went close to the tree under which Sita was sitting, and there he started singing the glories of Ram, and he started singing the various pastimes of Ram. And when Sita was sitting and she heard it she got surprised and she started looking, “Where is this coming from?”
In the whole of Lanka there were all kinds of sounds, but they were in glorification of Ravana; nothing was in the glorification of Ram. So, her heart just swelled in joy. But at the same time when she looked up she saw, “Who is this? Normally a sage or a brahmana or some person like that may glorify Ram, but this is a monkey, who is this monkey?
Initially Sita was delighted, but then she became suspicious, “What is
this? Could this be some agent of Ravana who has taken the form of monkey?” It is said that if you are beaten once or if you are burned once, you are twice shy. If we put our finger in some heated milk to find if it is hot we may get burned. The next time we will be very very cautious about touching. Similarly, once Sita had been deluded by the form changing demons, Ravana had tempted her to come out. Actually he had misled her into coming out of her cottage and out of the Laxman rekha, but now she was very cautious. So, when she saw this monkey she thought, “Who is this monkey. How is it speaking about Ram?” Hanuman very gently continued speaking about Ram and he jumped down and approached her and continued speaking about Ram, and he not only spoke about the pastimes of Ram which was generally known to everyone, but when he saw that he had got Sita’s attention, then he started speaking about incidents from their life which no one knew. He told about how once Ram and Sita were in the forest. At that time there was a bird who came, and that bird started approaching Sita or accosting Sita, and when he started accosting Sita, at that time she started flapping the bird away, and then Ram noticed, and then Ram took some grass from it and just hurled the grass, and that grass had the force of an arrow and it started across, and this bird flew all over. Nowhere could it escape the missile like grass, and then finally that bird came and surrendered to Ram itself; and that bird was actually a manifestation of Indra. He had become attracted to Sita, and at that time Ram had punished him. This was an incident which had happened in Citrakuta when Laxman was not been there over there.
Then Sita spoke, “Who is this, who are you?” Her guard started going a little lower, and that time Hanuman spoke. He said, “I am the servant of the servant of Ram. For searching you I have formed an alliance with Sugriva. Sugriva is the king of the vanaras and I am his servant.” And as
he continued speaking, slowly but surely he started winning her trust.
Generally whenever we approach people; when we approach a person whom we don’t know, or even someone we know but don’t know very well, we all have security wall that we put between ourselves and others. Of course when we are staying at home we have doors which protect us. If we are in some office or somewhere there is security which is a major concern, we have even guards who guard at that time. If at time if we are not expecting anyone and somebody rings the bell; then we may look who is there if there is camera. If there is no camera we may look through a peep hole to see who has come. We look at the person if he looks familiar or not familiar, and we may have a chain so that we can open the door a little bit so that the person cannot barge in. Basically, just as we don’t let any stranger to come into our house, we don’t even let anyone unfamiliar come close to us; the same applies at the emotional and relational level also.
When we are to meet someone, at that time we have to get them to lower them their guarding walls and open their guarding doors, and without that, things cannot move forward.
Hanuman’s purpose was to find Sita. He could have simply found Sita and given the signet to her and gone back, but he did not stop with that. He actually had a very emotionally rich and fulfilling reciprocation with Sita, and he gave assurance and confidence to Sita that Ram loves her and remembers her; Ram is searching for her, and Ram is soon going to come. He was able to do all these because he was able to earn his trust, and for earning that trust he first and foremost focused on that which is common between him and her. The two of them are unknown. He had heard about Sita, and Sita also probably saw some monkey down there, but Sita was at that time panicky as she was abducted. She may not have
recognized him also from there, but even if she recognizes him, how does she know that he is trustworthy? So, what he does is, he speaks about the common which is the Lord, and as he speaks about the Lord. By that the trust starts building and the doors of the heart starts opening.
In general when we relate with people we presume many things. There are many things which we assume that this is the way things are, but those things maybe obvious for us, but they may not be obvious for someone else. To the extent we make these assumptions, to that extent we can actually move forwards.
Once a traffic cop caught a person who was speeding, and this person told the other person, “Did you not see the other person? Did you not see the speed limit?” the other person says, “Yes, I saw the speed limit, but I just didn’t see you.” What that means that usually we think that there is nothing wrong in doing wrong if you are not caught for doing wrong. That is what people think, that if we get away there is no problem. “The problem was not that I was speeding; the problem was that you were seeing me.” Here what is happening is that the cop is expecting that there should be some respect for the law when he says, “Didn’t you see the speed limit?” But in this person there is no respect for the law, but there is only fear for the consequences of breaking the law, and he thinks that if he is not caught there is no problem at all. So, when two people are interacting and if there is no common point in terms of what is the common interest, or what is it that they share or what is the expectation of each other; without that we can’t move forward. So, what Hanuman does is, he simply glorifies Ram. By glorifying Ram he doesn’t start by glorifying Sita, “O how devoted you are. In spite of all the trouble you have remained faithful to Ram.” Because that would have raised the suspicion further. Even Ravana tried that initially.
When Ravana wanted to abduct
Sita, he first thought that I will do that by winning her over. So, he started praising Sita’s beauty, and he started describing his own wealth. He thought that by this he will win over Sita, but Hanuman did not do that. Hanuman simply glorified Ram. In fact we see how Ravana actually mislead Sita, and how Hanuman earned the trust of Sita. In one sense you could say that Ravana also won the trust of Sita, but it was temporarily. He actually misled her. He didn’t actually earn her trust. He misled her by his appearance and his words. When Ravana initially took on a garb, his purpose of taking up a garb and Hanuman’s purpose in taking up the garb were entirely different. Ravana wanted to take up the garb because he wanted to deceive Sita. He eventually wanted to abduct her. Hanuman wanted to take on a garb because he wanted to reach Sita; because he wanted to eventually unite Sita with Ram. So, both of them change their appearances. More important than the action is the intention.
Ravana and Hanuman both change their forms, but their purposes were entirely different. Ravana even if he took on the form of a saintly person, his consciousness had not changed; his consciousness was still demoniac. And what did Ravana do? He had a typical, mundane, materialistic mentality. For example, when a boy wants to woo a girl what does he do? He praises the girls beauty, and then he praises his own wealth, and then he trashes the competition,
Although Sita was married, Ravana had no respect for the vows of marriage. So, he says, “What are doing with Ram? He is a poverty stricken prince. Even his own father rejected him. So, what can he give you?” When Sita heard this she was furious and she was disturbed by it, but still she respected him because he looked like a saintly person, but
his intention was simply to manipulate Sita. Actually Hanuman’s intention was to reunite Sita with Ram. So, he first spoke some intimate pastimes of Sita and Ram which nobody knew, and then he gave the signet. She got the signet at that time when the trust got completely won over. That is why Hanuman is called Buddhimatam Varistam; the most intelligent among intelligent people.
Intelligence also has different aspects to it. Intelligence can be in terms of remembrance of facts. So, in religious circles it can be remembrance of scriptures. Intelligence can also be in terms of knowing what to do at what time. Nowadays people talk a lot about emotional intelligence; “You should be sensitive to others emotions, you should know how your own intelligence are acting and respond appropriately.” So, Hanuman exhibits his intelligence in such a way that he completely wins over Sita, and then reassures Sita about Ram’s imminent arrival; and once Sita understands that Hanuman is really a representative of Ram, she starts speaking. It was pouring out of her heart telling Hanuman about how Ravana was threatening her, how she is alone over there, how she is being tempted and threatened, and then she says that, “Actually Ravana has given me a time of one year within which I have to surrender to him. If I don’t he will kill me.” When the vision is of sense gratification, when one wants to enjoy the senses, one basically objectifies others; others simply becomes objects by which we can enjoy. If at one level Ravana wanted Sita as his queen; he said, “If you don’t become my queen, you will become my breakfast.” So, he was not completely treating Sita as a person in her own right; he was objectifying her. When Hanuman heard this he was alarmed. He said, “There is great danger, but there is not much time.” Because Ram wanted to immediately search for Sita, but it took him some time to reach to Sugiva. But Sugriva, even after he became the king, the four months of Caturmasya started. At that
time the rains were very heavy. Normally one would say, “O.k, if some loved ones are lost you won’t keep rains from stopping you from searching.” But at that particular time what happened was that, because Bali had been Indra’s son, and Bali had been killed, so Indra was furious, and Indra poured rains torrentially.
The monkeys are used to living in the forest, and the monkeys can move about in the forest also quite easily even when it is raining, but this rains were the rains of the kind which nobody had seen before. Because of this torrential rains for four months they couldn’t do anything, and then it took time for them to search. Sugriva had given one month to search and come back, but it had taken them six weeks to finally come to the ocean coast, and so a lot of time had passed. So, Hanuman said, “There is a great danger to your life. So, you just come with me. I will carry you.” Now, sometimes what happens is when we put on some other façade; at that time we may normally have impersonated it in a particular way or we may act it in some particular way. But then when suddenly some rush of emotion comes, at that time we forget that we have to act in this way, and then we start acting in our normal way.
I met one devotee who was earlier a spy in the government. He was telling me that if somebody is from India, and suppose that person is to be a spy in some country like Russia, then he has to learn and speak Russian very fluently. What tests he had was; he was sleeping one day and suddenly someone threw a bucket of water on him. Normally when we wake up, disturbed from the sleep, we get angry and we may curse. They are checking if you curse in Russian or you curse in Hindi. If at that time you curse in your mother tongue; that means that you are still not trained enough. Even in the most emergency situation you should be able to act as if you are a Russian. If you are only trained to that extent,
then you can actually become a spy.
In the case of Hanuman what happened was that he was there in the small form and he had sneaked in like a small creature, a small monkey, and he said, “Sita, you can come with me. I will carry you.” He had forgotten that he was in a small form. So, Sita became amused and she said, “You have a body of a monkey and you also have a brain of a monkey. How can you carry me? You are so small.” Now Hanuman was a warrior and for a warrior to have his strength questioned is a great challenge.
Once I had gone to one Middle East country, and when we go those countries we can’t wear saffron. So, when I went to the temple, the devotees who had taken me there just parked me over there in civil clothes. I was trying to go into the temple and then change into saffron before I gave the class. There in the temple we can wear saffron, but not publicly. When I went to the temple I was not wearing any kind of devotional clothes. One devotee came and start preaching to me, “Do you know the Bhagavad-gita?” I thought, “I know the Bhagavad-gita and I write on the Bhagavad-gita everyday” That ego comes up at that time. So, I told him, “Obviously I know the Bhagavad-gita.” But then I thought, “He doesn’t know because I am not wearing devotee clothes right now.” So, I just calmed myself down. Similarly, Hanuman thought, “Do you think I am not strong enough to carry you?” So, he felt his strength challenged by that, and then immediately right in front of Sita’s eyes – Sita was looking at him; now he became bigger and bigger and took a giant form, and he became so big that he said, “I can easily carry you across.” And now Sita said, “Yes, you can easily carry me across, but if you carry me like this what will be difference between Ravana and Ram. In Ram’s absence Ravana took me, and if in Ravana’s absence
Ram comes or he sends his representative to take me away, what is the difference? Let Ram come as a hero and punish Ravana. I will wait till then.” Hanuman appreciated that devotional intent and mood that she wanted; she did not just want herself to be protected, but she wanted Ram’s good name also to be protected at that time. And then he bade farewell to her, and then he came back.
End of Transcription.
Transcribed by Sadananada Prabhu
Transcript
This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
so today, since tomorrow is Ram Navami I will be talking about some incidents and lessons from the Ramayana and I will be speaking on the theme of Hanuman’s devotion to Ram and what we can learn from that yesterday evening I spoke about how Hanuman was able to bring about the union between Ram and Sugriv and today we will move forwards from there if we consider the Ramayana the section of the Ramayana where Hanuman appears is the Kishkindha Kaand the Aranya Kaand, the Kishkindha Kaand that is the time when he appears and then he comes into his own in the Sundar Kaand so the word Sundar has many different significances if we consider all the other sections of the Ramayana they are either describing the events there or the location there is the Bal Kaand, it describes the childhood activities of Ram the Ayodhya Kaand describes the activities in Ayodhya the Aranya Kaand describes what happens in the forest there is the Yuddha Kaand, it describes the activity the Uttar Kaand is the final Kaand the Kishkindha Kaand is actually the geographical location the Sundar Kaand is the only Kaand that is neither seems to be related to the activity directly or the place so there are Acharyas who have given different meanings for this Sundar refers at one level to that was one of the names that Hanuman was given he is a very attractive child another understanding is that actually it is permeated with the beauty of devotion in fact this is the only Kaand in the whole Ramayana where Ram is present the minimum in fact the Kaand begins with Ram seeing Hanuman off and the whole Kaand is about the search for Sita in which Ram is not present and then Hanuman jumps across goes there, finds Sita, does heroic adventures over there and then he returns and when he returns he unites with Ram and that is where the role of Ram directly comes so at the beginning and at the end and yet the Lord’s presence is felt actually the most in this Kaand so it is described that Lord Ram sent vanara doota he sent messengers who were out to search for Sita that’s what he sent and then as the vanaras were going out what did the Kapivara Kapivara means among the monkeys, they were the best foremost they were constantly remembering him this is describing the this is describing the Nama Ramayana which is 108 names of Ram which describe chronologically the full Ramayana so like sometimes if students don’t study for the exam then there is a crash course just do this and pass the exam so it is said that if you can’t recite the whole Ramayana this is a crash course, just recite the 108 names of Ramayana of Ram in the Nama Ramayana you get the benefit of reciting the Ramayana so each name is related to one particular past time so in the in this particular Kaand of the Ramayana there is basically the presence of Ram in the absence of Ram the presence of Ram is in his remembrance the presence of Ram in the absence of Ram is in his remembrance so Kapivara Santata Chintita Rama they were always remembering him and the height of it comes the height of this emotion of recollection and separation will come when Ram is recollected in the discussion between Sita and Hanuman so that time there are two great devotees of Ram the consort of Ram and the servant of Ram both of them are separated from Ram both of them are remembering him very intensely so the dramatic climax of the Ramayana will come in the next Kaand where there is a Yudha that is going to happen but the emotional climax in one sense comes over here because there is the intense remembrance by both of them so we will go towards that in new course but here let’s focus on the situation that starts of this incident Hanuman is a powerful Vanara but he is not considered the foremost of the Vanaras Vali had been the king earlier and Sugriva had been the assistant and Hanuman was one of the assistants of Sugriva who had been exiled or rather who had fled for his life and was living in exile at that time Hanuman is resourceful he is intelligent but he has not done anything spectacular till then among all the Vanaras Ram meets Hanuman first and it is Hanuman who introduces him to Sugriva and in that sense among all the Vanaras just simply from the fact of the first meeting Hanuman has a special place for Ram but it is not just because of the first meeting it is also because of the great devotion that Hanuman has and not just because of the great devotion as will be seen eventually he has great prowess, great heroism great courage which will be eventually seen but before that when Ram is departing, when Ram is arranging for the armies for the divisions of the monkeys to go in four different directions Sugriva is arranging and Ram is overseeing it all at that time Angad is made the head of the division that is going southwards and Ram at that time calls Hanuman Hanuman is going there as the assistant so Hanuman goes there as the assistant at that time his focus he singles out Hanuman and he tells that Sampatti saw Ravana going in the southern direction even Jatayu had said that actually he is going in the southern direction in the Ramayana there are many characters who are actually brothers, Vali and Sugriva are brothers Sampatti and Jatayu are brothers so Vali and Sugriva are brothers who reconcile at the last moment through Ram Sampatti and Jatayu they don’t meet once again once they are separated but they both meet in the service of the Lord Jatayu lays down his life serving for the Lord and Sampatti actually in a sense gains his life back by serving the Lord he has been immobilised because he had lost his wings when Jatayu and Sampatti were flying high into the sky they had their young blood and adventurous spirit they wanted to go to the sun and then normally when both of them started going up, both of them had the adventurous spirit but still because Sampatti was older among the two so he had some responsible spirit also when he saw the heat was becoming too much he covered Jatayu with his wings in order to shield him the result was that his wings got burned so its interesting for both the birds something similar happened they both lost their wings so Sampatti lost his wings in trying to protect Jatayu and Jatayu lost his wings in trying to protect Sita now for every living being there is some particular feature of the body which is vitally important so each living being has its defining feature so for the birds it is primarily their wings that’s what enables them to fly so to lose the wings signifies the greatest loss practically speaking so Jatayu he loses his wings before he loses his life that means that he keeps fighting till he loses everything ultimately he loses his life but for Sampatti whatever he has lost his wings had been lost but when he gets when he fulfils his service he tells the Vanaras later that actually Jatayu that Ravan had gone that side this whole incident will come later but I am just drawing a correlation over here to illustrate a point that at that time his wings come back and then he flies away and he attains elevation so at this point Jatayu has told that they have gone southern direction and Sugriva and the monkeys have also seen Ravana going in the southern direction so Ram tells Hanuman that it is the party that is going the south that is most likely to find Sita and if you find her I would like to give you a signet a memento a symbol that you are my authorised representative and through that she will recognise you and she will accept you as someone who has genuinely come from me so this is both an act of trust and an act of preparation in the sense that he is preparing Hanuman that when you meet we will talk later about how how Hanuman wins the trust of Sita that is very significant for us to understand how relationships work and how we can build trust in relationships but at this stage it is Ram who is expressing trust in Hanuman and is also preparing Hanuman for the eventual situation that he is going to encounter the human mind works in different ways in different situations when we are interested in some responsibility sometimes the mind may interpret the responsibility as a burden I have to do this but sometimes the mind may interpret that as oh you trust me I can do this yes I will try my best so sometimes the trust that is reposed the expectation that is put the expectation can inspire and sometimes the expectation can burden so we all live in a relational world where every relationship means that there is some contribution that is made and there is some expectation that is there so in a relationship if somebody has too much expectation and they make too little contribution then the relationship starts getting strained if we start saying do this, do this, do this, do this, do this we expect people to do a lot and we don’t do even one thing that they want us to do then they say why should I do all this so every relationship is based on reciprocation now for Ram he is offering this symbol of trust to Hanuman and Hanuman is overwhelmed with gratitude that Ram is specially trusting him entrusting him so by entrusting him that signal Hanuman feels enlivened the whole party goes off at that time and they meet with various dangers at different times and they go through all those dangers and finally Hanuman is the only person who is capable of jumping across Lanka across the ocean to get to Lanka and he jumps through all that is also a great adventure we will focus on the theme of Sundarkanda which is the presence of Ram and the absence of Ram so we will not talk about his jump or his adventures we will just focus right now on the theme that he just so heroically so fearlessly goes over all obstacles it is the journey that is difficult but it is not that sometimes we go through a very difficult journey to meet someone and then they are there to welcome us it is nice at least at the end of the journey there is somebody who loves us, somebody who welcomes us but here after a long journey there is no welcome, there is a switch so it is after the journey ends the journey itself is challenging but after the journey ends another bigger challenge begins actually so Srila Prabhupada’s journey was also like that coming to America was very difficult single-handedly but after coming there was no welcoming party there was absolutely no one he had to make everything on his own so that is quite difficult for him when he somehow with great effort he finally finds Sita but even after finding Sita that is not enough, Sita has never met him Sita doesn’t even know who he is at least in this particular Ila, they are all eternal associates but when the Lord descends to the world at that time he doesn’t always most of the times he as well as associates act as if they are normal human beings and so in that case that is why they have never met so Hanuman is a majestic warrior but he is a purposeful warrior so he sneaks in taking a very tiny form enters into Lanka, slips around and finally comes to the Ashok Vatika which is Ravana’s favourite gardens and that is where he has kept Sita and Ravana himself comes again and again to try to tempt Sita he uses in trying to pressure Sita he uses what is called as the good cop bad cop strategy good cop bad cop strategy is that if there is a prisoner whom the police want them to confess so what they do is one cop who comes in and acts as the bad cop will threaten beat and abuse you will be destroyed if you don’t do this and after this person has beaten him threatened him, tormented him the good cop comes along terrible thing, if I had known I would have stopped I was not here but he is also doing his job I will ensure that he doesn’t do this again but you also have to help me, you reveal something so they both come together and through that they weaken the person it’s that those who are in in crime in criminology basically they say that if you are always good or if you are always bad it doesn’t work, as effectively if you are alternate between good and bad so Ravana when he would come he would promise you can be my chief queen all the opulence of Lanka will be for you and then he had all these demonesses with him who were guarding Sita they would threaten her, some of them had the job of threatening her if you don’t succumb to if you don’t surrender to Ravana you will be ruined, you will be destroyed Ram will never come, Ram must already be dead also and there are others who would allure him Ram himself would sometimes tempt and sometimes threaten so Hanuman was sitting on a tree and observing all this he was very intelligent so because of his intelligence he could see one thing and he could perceive everything that was happening he could see Sita was when Ravana would come along now Hanuman he could see this is Sita and he could see that she was very apprehensive she had pulled her body very close to her, pulling her legs trying to create as much distance as from Ravana as possible and he could see the fear on Sita’s face the disgust on her face and he felt bad at the same time he didn’t want his presence to be detected so he just waited so Ravana finished his whole succession of threatening her, tempting her Ravana what he would do is every night when he would sleep after waking up the first thing he would remember Sita and he would just go to Sita try to tempt her or threaten her and then not succeed then he would go back so Hanuman had been searching all over the Lanka at night he had started from the coastline in the morning he had travelled all day and he had reached Lanka eventually when there using the cover of night he had searched and by the time he found Ashok Vatika it was the morning so it was early morning so Ravana had just come in and Ravana went away in half actually Ravana just came straight by the tree where Hanuman was sitting but Ravana was so caught in his infatuation with Sita he didn’t notice anything nothing out of place even if he had noticed it was just another monkey over there so then Hanuman came closer to Sita and when he came close at that time he started thinking how do I approach her so then he found a solution he said that the best way to do is the Rakshasis they had been threatening her tempting her but finally they had they just went a little distance away from her so that they could do their own thing so Sita was a little bit alone at that time they were still guarding but they gave her a little privacy so they had threatened her and just let her alone to think so then at that time Hanuman went close to the tree on which Sita was sitting and then he started singing the glories of Ravana he started speaking various pastimes of Ravana and when Sita was sitting and she heard it she was surprised and started looking where is this coming from in the whole of Lanka there are all kinds of sounds but they were in glorification of Ravana nothing was in the glorification of Ravana so her heart just swelled in joy at the same time she looked up and she said who is this normally a sage or a brahmana or some kind of person like that may glorify Ram this is a monkey, who is this monkey so she immediately initially she was delighted but then she became suspicious what is this, could this be some agent of Ravana who has taken the form of a monkey it said that if you are bitten once if you are burnt once then you are twice shy if you put your finger in some heated milk is it hot, it’s burnt next time you will be very very cautious about touching so similarly once Sita had been deluded by the form changing demons Ravana had tempted her to come out actually misled her into coming out of her cottage out of the Lakshman Rekha so now she was very cautious so she saw this monkey, who is this monkey how is he speaking about Ram so Hanuman very gently just continued speaking about Ram and he jumped down and he jumped down and then he approached her and he continued speaking about Ram and he not only spoke about the pastimes of Ram which are generally known to everyone when he saw that he had got Sita’s attention then he started speaking about incidents from their life which no one knew so that’s what he was trying to so he told about how when Ram and Sita were in the forest at that time there was a bird who came and that bird started approaching Sita and when he started approaching Sita at that time she started flapping the bird away and then Ram noticed and then Ram took just a grasp from it and just hurled the grasp and that grasp became like had the force of a missile of an arrow started charging across and this bird flew flew flew flew all over nowhere could he escape the missile like grass and finally that bird came and surrendered to Ram itself and that bird was actually a manifestation of Indra he had become attracted to Sita and at that time Ram had punished him so now this was an incident which had happened in Ekjitara Gudi when Lakshman had not been there so whence she spoke with him who is this? who are you? her guard started going down a little lower and at that time Hanuman spoke he said I am Sita I am the servant of Ram he says Ram for searching for you has formed an alliance with Sugriva Sugriva is the king of the Vanaras and I am his servant and as he continued speaking slowly but surely he started winning her trust so generally whenever we approach people anyone approach a new person whom we don’t know or even someone whom we know but we don’t know very well so we all have a security wall that we put between us and others of course when we are staying at home we have a door which protects us so if we are in some office or somewhere there is security which is a major concern so we have even guards which guard at that time so now when there is a door at that time if we are not expecting anyone and somebody rings the bell then if we have a camera and we look who is actually there if we don’t have a camera then we may go and look through a peephole who is this person, we look at the person does it look familiar or not familiar we may open the door, we may first have a chain by which we open the door a little bit so that the person can’t barge in so basically just as physically we don’t let anyone else come into our house we don’t let anyone unfamiliar come close to us the same applies at an emotional level also, at a relational level also so when people when we have to meet someone at that time we have to get them to lower their guarding walls, open their guarding doors and without that things cannot move forward so Hanuman, his purpose, he could simply have said my purpose is to find Sita he could simply have found Sita and gone back his purpose is ok, give this segment to Sita he could have just gone ahead and gone back but he did not just stop with that he actually had a very emotionally rich and fulfilling reciprocation with Sita and there he gave assurance to Sita confidence in her that Ram loves you Ram remembers you, Ram is searching for you, Ram is soon going to come and he was able to do all this because he earned her trust and for earning that trust what did he do? he first and foremost focused on that which is common between him and her the two of them are unknown they don’t know each other, he has heard about Sita and Sita also probably saw some monkeys down there but Sita was at that time in panic being abducted, so she may not recognise him also from there, but even if she recognises him how does she know that he is trustworthy so what he does is, he speaks about the common that is the Lord and as they speak about the Lord, by that trust starts building the doors of the heart start opening in general, when we relate with people we presume many things there are many things which we just assume this is the way things are but those things may be obvious for us they may not be obvious for someone else but to the extent we don’t we make these assumptions, to that extent we can actually move forward once a traffic cop caught a person who was speeding this person told the person did you not see the traffic sign, did you know the speed limit the person said yes, I saw the speed limit cop I just didn’t see you what that means is that usually we think that there is nothing wrong in doing wrong if you are not caught for doing wrong so that’s what people think that actually, if I can just get away with it what is the problem the problem was not that I was speeding, the problem was that you were seeing me so here, what has happened the cop is expecting that there should be some respect for law did you see the speed limit but among this person, there is no respect for the law there is only fear about the consequences of breaking the law and if I am not caught, then there is no problem at all so when two people are interacting if there is no common point in terms of what is the common interest or what is it that they share what is their expectation of each other without that, we can’t move forward so what Hanuman does is he simply glorifies Ram now, by glorifying Ram he doesn’t start by glorifying Sita oh, how devoted you are, in spite of all these troubles you remain faithful to him, he doesn’t do that because that would have raised the suspicion further so Ravana tried that initially when Ravana, he wanted to abduct Sita he first thought that I will just do it by winning her over so he started praising his own he started praising Sita’s beauty and he started describing his own wealth he thought by this, I will win over Sita but Hanuman did not do that Hanuman simply glorified Ram in fact, we see how Ravana actually misled Sita and how Hanuman earned the trust of Sita in one sense you could say Ravana also earned the trust of Sita but it was temporary, he misled her it was not exactly earning her trust he misled her by his appearance and his words Ravana, initially he took on a garb his purpose of taking on a garb and Hanuman’s purpose of taking on a garb they were entirely different Ravana took on a garb because he wanted to deceive Sita he eventually wanted to abduct her Hanuman took on a garb because he wanted to reach Sita so that he could eventually unite Sita with Ram so both of them changed their appearances it’s not the action that is important more important than the action is the intention Ravana and Hanuman both changed their forms but their purposes were entirely different Ravana, even if he took on the form of a saintly person his consciousness had not changed his consciousness was still demonic and what did Ravana do? he had a typical materialistic mentality so when a boy wants to woo a girl what does he do? he praises the girl’s beauty and then he praises his own wealth and then he trashes the competition why are you going to her? why are you going to him? so although Sita was married, he had no respect for the vows of marriage so he says Ram, what are you doing with him? he’s a poverty stricken prince he has been abandoned even by his father his own father rejected him what can he give you? so when Sita heard this she was furious she was disturbed by it but still she respected him because he looked like a saintly person but his intention was simply to manipulate Sita so actually Hanuman’s intention was to reunite Sita with Ram so when eventually Sita got his trust he first spoke the glories of Ram then spoke some intimate pastimes of Ram and Sita which nobody else knew and then he gave the signet he got the signet, at that time her trust was completely won over so Hanuman had said is buddhimatam varishtam he is the most intelligent among intelligent people now intelligence also has different aspects to it intelligence can be in terms of remembrance of facts so in religious circles it can be remembrance of scripture intelligence can also be in terms of knowing what to do at what time nowadays people talk a lot about emotional intelligence you should be sensitive to others emotions know how your own emotions are acting and respond appropriately so Hanuman, he exhibits intelligence in such a way that he completely wins over Sita and then reassures Sita about Ram’s imminent arrival and once Sita understands what Ram is, what has happened that Hanuman is really Ram’s representative then she starts speaking thus pouring out her heart, telling her how Ram is threatening her how she is alone over there, how she is being tempted and threatened and then she says that actually within one year he has given me time of one year within which I have to surrender to him if I don’t, he will kill me when the vision is of sense gratification when one wants to enjoy the senses one basically objectifies others others simply become objects by which we can enjoy so at one level Ramana wanted Sita as his queen so if you don’t become my queen you will become my breakfast so it is not treating Sita as a person in her own right it is objectified Hanuman heard this and was alarmed he said there is great danger actually there is not much time because Ram, he wanted to immediately search for Sita but it took him several weeks to reach it took him some time to reach till Sugriva but then Sugriva, even after he became the king the four months of Chaturmas started so at that time the rains were very heavy now when you say okay, if some loved one is lost you won’t keep rains from stopping you from searching but at that particular time what happened was that because Vali had been Indra’s son and Vali had been killed so Indra was furious and Indra poured rains torrentially the monkeys are used to living in the forest and monkeys can move about in the forest also quite easily even when it is raining but these rains were rains of the kind which nobody had seen before so because of those torrential rains for those four months they couldn’t do anything and then it took time for them to search Sugriva had given them one month to search and come back so they had taken six weeks to finally come to the banks of the to the ocean coast and so a lot of time had passed Hanuman said that you just this is a great danger for you just come with me immediately, I’ll carry you now sometimes what happens is when we take on a farm we put on some other facade at that time normally we may have that have that we may impersonate in a particular way we may act in a particular way but then when suddenly some rush of emotions comes at that time we forget okay I am supposed to act in this way and then we start acting in our normal way so I knew one devotee who was who was earlier a spy so he was a spy of the government so he was telling me that actually say if you are say if somebody is from India and that person is to be a spy in say some country like Russia so he learns Russian he speaks Russian very fluently so what they test is that one of the test that he had was that he was sleeping one day and suddenly somebody just threw a bucket of water on him normally when we wake up disturbed from sleeping we get angry and we may curse so they are checking whether you curse in Russian or you curse in Hindi so if at that time you curse in your mother tongue that means you still are not trained enough so even in the most emergency situation you should be able to act as if you are a Russian only train to that extent then you can then you can actually become a spy so in the case of Hanuman what happened is that he was here in the small form he sneaked in like a small creature small monkey and he said Sita you know you can come with me I will carry you now he had forgotten that he was in a small form he had forgotten that now he will carry me so Sita became amused he said oh monkey you know you have the body of a monkey and you also have a brain of a monkey how could you carry me you are so small now Hanuman is a warrior for a warrior to have his strength questioned it’s a great challenge it’s like say somebody say suppose you are a teacher of the Bhagavad Gita and then you know it happened to me once that I had gone to one Middle East country and there when we go to that country some countries we can’t wear saffron so then I went to the temple and the devotee who had taken me to the temple he just parked me over there and I had gone in civil clothes shirt pant so then I was trying to go to the temple and then change into saffron before I give the class in the temple we can wear saffron but not publicly so when I went to the temple so at that time I was not at all wearing any kind of devotional clothes so one devotee came there and started preaching to me do you know the Bhagavad Gita so you mean I know the Bhagavad Gita I write on the Bhagavad Gita everyday so all that ego comes out at that time so I said obviously I know the Bhagavad Gita but then I thought he doesn’t know I am not wearing devotional clothes right now so he doesn’t know so I just calm myself down so then for Hanuman you think I am not strong enough to carry you so he felt his strength challenged by that and then immediately right in front of Sita’s eyes Sita was looking down at him like this he just became bigger and bigger he just became giant form and he became so big he says I can easily carry you across he says yes yes you can carry me Sita Sita said yes you can carry me but if you carry me like this what will be the difference between Ravana and Ram he says in Ram’s absence Ravana took me away from there and in Ravana’s absence if Ram comes and Ram sends his representative to take me away he says let Ram come as a hero and punish Ravana I will wait till then so Hanuman appreciated that devotional intent that devotional mood that she wanted not just herself to be protected but she wanted Ram’s good name also to be protected at that time and then he bid farewell to her and then he came back so at this point we will not go over all the adventures of his burning Lanka that we will discuss in another session but at this point so when he and Hanuman he and Sita are discussing the glories of Ram that is the time when the Ramayana as I said attains its emotional climax and then again there is separation he assures Sita that Ram will soon come and then he after devastating Lanka flies back when he goes back he goes straight to Ram and then when he returns back he gives the news to Ram that yes Sita has been found so in Sanskrit there are sentences can be there is in English there has to be a fixed word order first we have the subject then we have the verb then we have the object Sita has been found Sita is found so sorry yeah so then what he said is that in Sanskrit you can invert the word order so one of the Acharyas explains that when Hanuman saw Ram he offered his obeisance he said found he is found because if it is Sita that is not giving any information what has happened to Sita everybody is thinking about Sita but what has happened he is found they all know what is to be searched for what is to be found so found so Hanuman is found has been Sita and he speaks like that so he he is so sensitive to understand what Ram is going through and he speaks the essential message found lost or lost lost not found found so like that now one of my services is writing so in the writing we were told how how an editor’s mind works so once the editor was having his home here and his office here and along the way there was a market in which there was a shop that sold fish and then on top it written fresh fish sold here so this editor was walking back forth back forth and his editing brain was working so then one day he went to the shopkeeper and he said that actually you know this notice is right below the shop this shop is right below the notice so why do you need here over here just write fresh fish sold so the owner said ya ok makes sense so he rubbed off he over painted that here then next day he came and the editor again thought about it says this is a market nobody is going to have charity over here so why do you need sold over here so he said just have fresh fish so he said ok then he removed the sold also then after that after sometime the editor was passing by again his editing brain was working he said actually nobody is going to give rotten fish why do you need fresh he says ya makes sense so he removed the fresh also then after that a few days again he came and he says actually you can smell the fish on the other end of the street also why do you need fish so he deleted the fish also so now whatever the point of communication is to communicate as concisely as possible sometimes that concise communication may mean that no words also are required so Krishna Das says that actually eloquence means truth spoken concisely so when Hanuman returned the first thing he says found Sita has been found first word he speaks is found and Ram is delighted and then Hanuman tells all his adventures of what all happened and Ram here is completely engrossed and at the end of it when Hanuman finishes the full narrative at that time Ram says that oh Hanuman the service that you have done to me is unparalleled he says if I had been a king I would have given you opulent wealth I would have given jewels, garlands I would have given so much wealth oh Hanuman but now I have nothing I have nothing so what can I give you I give you my embrace and he came forward and he pulled Hanuman tight embrace so the Acharyas explain that this actually signifies Ram giving the greatest blessing to him because the Lord can give us many different blessings but all the things that are valuable or attractive in this world they have some temporary value and temporary attraction even the most attractive things stay attractive for sometime afterwards it doesn’t stay attractive he says ultimately the whole purpose of the world is to attract is to attract us towards the Lord everything attractive in this world manifests a spark of Krishna’s attractiveness yad yad vibhuti matsatvam shreemadurjitame tatta devavagacchatvam mamatejo amshasambhava mamatejo amshasambhava Krishna says everything manifests a spark of my splendour so whatever is attractive in this world we can get whatever pleasure we get from it and much more if we get Krishna if we get the Lord so the Lord is the Lord’s greatest blessing wealth health power prestige all these are blessings but the greatest blessing is the Lord himself so in one sense Ram is saying I have nothing to give you and so I’ll give you my embrace but what Acharya explains what he means is that I will give you the greatest blessing the satchitanand the form of the Lord is the reservoir of all attractiveness that is the form to which the devotee’s heart is constantly attracted and Hanuman is always devoted to Ram at this point that devotion attains its zenith in the reciprocation from the Lord when the Lord pulls him into a tight embrace for all the adventurous fearless and dangerous things that Hanuman did in the service of the Lord the result was the Lord embraced similarly Sanatana Goswami one of the great Acharyas in our tradition he describes a book called in a book called Brihad Bhagavatamrat how the soul who is in this material world returns back to Krishna after a long long journey through various levels of existence when the soul returns back to Krishna Krishna is so delighted in fact Krishna sees this Gopakumar oh my dear friend where have you been Krishna when he sees Gopakumar he is so delighted Gopakumar is so delighted Krishna is so delighted that Krishna faints in ecstasy now Krishna loses his Krishna consciousness and then all the Gopas who are there they all look at Gopakumar and say what did you do to our Krishna I didn’t do anything he is scared but then they bring some water and sprinkle water on him and when they sprinkle the water Krishna comes back to consciousness and he says oh Gopakumar embraces him welcome back he says you have been away from me for so long welcome welcome and he is delighted to have Gopakumar back with him similarly for us we also have to go through many difficulties in the world in our journey in our service to the lord during our stay in this world but at the end the lord is there to embrace us just as Hanuman was rewarded with the embrace of the lord similarly we will be rewarded if we faithfully serve him through whatever difficulties we have and we will be rewarded with the embrace of the lord that is the reward that Hanuman got and that is the reward that beckons all of us when we take inspiration from Hanuman when we take inspiration from the lord’s pastimes and try to devote ourselves to him so I’ll summarise what I spoke today I started by speaking about how Hanuman is he comes into his own in the Sundar kand that the whole kand is named after him and after the beauty the sweet reciprocation that happens between him and Sita this is the kand when Ram is least present in terms of action but Ram is most present in terms of recollection the emotional climax comes in this kand when the devotee of Ram the consort of Ram and the servant of Ram reunite and they are intensely remembering him so at the start although Hanuman is not the foremost not the leader of the group of monkeys Angada is the leader but still Ram singles him out and entrusts him with the signature so when we are given some trust when we are given some responsible service our mind may interpret it as a burden but if we see it as a trust oh even you feel I can do it I will try my best to do it then that responsibility that’s reposing of trust can inspire us to bring out our best Hanuman when he single handedly goes all the way to Lanka at that time the journey is difficult and after going there also the there is no welcome in fact there is suspicion so he has to not only go through all the Vanaras but even the person who is going to be she is also suspicious both Ravana and Hanuman change their forms but their intention is opposite Hanuman’s intention is benevolent Ravana’s intention is malevolent and by the common point by focussing on what is common between him and Sita that is Ram by speaking about Ram first general glories then specific pastime which nobody except Ram and Sita knew and then showing the segment he wins her heart then Sita reveals her sorrow reveals her agony in separation from Ram and Hanuman is ready to immediately take her back so his he is very careful in keeping his keeping his form small so that he is not detected but at that particular point he just forgets that and he says I will carry you right now then how can you carry so then he manifests his big form so sometimes we may we may act in a particular way but we have to know that our whatever is at the core of our heart it will come out so the service attitude was at the core and that time the service attitude came out in a way which was not compatible with the form he had when he manifested large form and Ram came and Hanuman eventually came back to Ram at that time Hanuman was offered the embrace by Ram the external reason is I don’t have anything else to give you but the internal understanding is that I am so pleased with you that I give myself to you so the greatest blessing of the lord is the lord himself if we can become attracted to him if our consciousness can become fixed in him then thereby we get the greatest satisfaction and thereby we get liberated and just as Ram embraces Hanuman welcoming him back similarly when the soul returns back to the spiritual world Krishna welcomes him reuniting delighted to be reunited with the lost soul as Krishna did with Gopakumar thank you very much Hare Krishna any questions or comments Isita gave one of her ornaments she dropped some of her ornaments on the way when she saw these monkeys are there at that time she dropped those ornaments so that Ram will know and Vanara picked up the ornaments and showed it to Ram and that time later she gave one of her ornaments to remind Ram that actually the meeting has happened and basically it was we give a gift and we receive a gift we receive a gift and we give a gift so through that Ram’s desire he was already very concerned about Isita and wanted to be with her but then he saw that Isita is there and I have to go to her so that was how the reciprocation happened and Hanuman was the medium through which the reciprocation happened Ram already had trust on Hanuman so just to build the trust between Hanuman and Isita Ram gave the memento but like he already had the trust on Hanuman and Ram but so why Isita gave the memento okay so why did Isita give that was simply reciprocation my lord has given me something so I should give something back to her she did not have anything else to give so Ram gave one of his signet so she gave one of her jewels back that’s basically the dati pati grhanati giving and receiving reciprocation yes yes yes so how do we build a trust with unknown people as I said basically focus on the common points this is Hanuman and Ram the common point Sita and Hanuman the common point was Ram so some ways if you meet a new person if say they are from the same same state where we are from then we speak in a common language that creates some bond with us or if we work in the same company then there is some commonality if we may be in the same profession that creates commonality so basically there is a circle of our interests circle of things which concern us and circle of things which concern them so we find the common point that’s how we move forward that’s how any relationship can grow otherwise sometimes we meet people and if we don’t know what to talk we just make small talking so sometimes we may go to get together and ten people all of them may ask weather is good today isn’t it weather is good today so we just make a talk it’s ok as a starting point but we should speak not because we have to say something but because we have something to say so in general if we just come a little bit out of our walks and try to think about what is it that is of concern to this person which is also of my interest so generally one of the easiest ways to build trust with people is to ask them about their interest if you don’t know what their interests are then just ask them about themselves so when we ask them about themselves and they may be reserved in speaking initially but they speak a few things and then we can find out what is it that is common between us so basically in every interaction if it’s not just a functional interaction you go to a shop and buy something but it’s something where we want to develop a relationship so then we have to find out what their interests are and then check where their interest correlates with our interest so if we take the time to hear basically love or respect or affection it can be conveyed in many different ways but the beginning of doing it all is two things to hear and to understand to hear what this person has to say and then not just hear the words to try to fit it into our world view is to understand in the whole Bhagavad Gita the first chapter is Arjuna speaking to Krishna so Arjuna is pouring out his heart and throughout all Krishna just hears and Krishna understands what Arjuna is going through and then later on when Krishna speaks Arjuna is ready to hear because Krishna is Krishna has heard out Arjuna’s case so basically when we understand that doesn’t necessarily mean we have to accept what they are saying they may have some understanding which may not be exactly correct or their opinion may be different from ours but at least we understand we show them that we understand suppose we go to a doctor and even before we speak anything the doctor gives a prescription what do you mean let me tell my symptoms I know your symptoms now even if the doctor is expert enough just to look at the patient and understand what the symptoms are still the point is not just to give the prescription the point of the doctor’s interaction with the patient is also to inspire the patient to take the prescription and for that that inspiration to be there in the patient the patient has to feel heard and understood okay this is my problem and the doctor understands my problem so if the doctor although in a sense it is the patient who needs the doctor and that sense the patient has to put the trust but the doctor has to understand so hear and understand after that when the doctor speaks the patient will be more receptive to accepting it similarly for us in general when we interact with others the first thing we can do is hear and understand if we do that that itself is a significant step forward in not necessarily winning their trust but at least beginning the process for earning their trust sometimes we just when we are interacting with an entirely new person it is like entering into darkness we don’t even know what is going to come next but the one sure way by which we can turn on the light whenever there is darkness is just ask them about themselves and to the extent they speak we hear and understand then to that extent the light starts coming and then we can find the common areas answer your question yes few months back we were having together and we ended up talking about lord rama one of the matajis said i don’t like lord rama and of course the question was just because listening to gobi he left mother sita so what was the message to the people of kingdom at that time and what is the message for us why did lord rama do that why did he leave sita just by listening to gobi yeah so why did ram leave sita just by hearing some unsubstantial accusation by a washerman actually last time when i had come i gave a whole class on this topic the one hour class but i will try to speak in as briefly as possible here mainly there is a conflict of duties so if firstly let’s start with the misconception is it that ram himself suspected sita is it ram himself for his own sake rejected sita if ram had if ram had suspected or rejected sita on his own personal account then he could immediately have got married to someone else he did not do that not only did he not get married to anyone else when the sacrifices had to be performed at that time he insisted that a golden image of sita be made and put that in front next to her now sacrifices yajnas require a certain level of purity so if he had thought sita was impure then how would he have had sita in that sacrifice with him so that means from his perspective that his personal perspective he held sita in so much regard that he considered her fit to be with him even for prior sacrifices so in that sense it was not Ram as a person Ram as a husband who rejected Sita as a wife it was Ram as a king who did that so we all have different roles in which we have different responsibilities and sometimes the responsibilities from different roles may go in conflict so in this case for Ram it was important for him to ensure that as a king he is exemplary and his being exemplary meant that there should not be any suspicion about anyone connected with him also so he had already taken preventive measures Sita had already done the agati pariksha and not only just Lakshman and others or Vanara even the devatas had been present over there so if in spite of that still people were accusing then what more could Ram do so if he decided to take action against those who were casting that accusation that would only make him seem that he was so attached that anybody who accuses him he takes vindictive action against them so he had his duty as a king and he had his duty as his husband so now these two duties came in conflict husband should always cherish and protect the wife as a king he had to do what it took to maintain the position the sanctity of the position of the king so the way he found a solution was that he sent Sita away from her sometimes the word may be used that he exiled her but exile is not the right word exactly because exile means when it’s sent out into the forest with absolutely no one to care for but Ram sent Sita yes into the forest but that forest was still in his kingdom only and it was right next to Valmiki’s ashram so in that sense he entered he knew that she would take shelter in Valmiki’s ashram and Valmiki would give her shelter and Valmiki’s ashram was under his kingdom only so in that sense Ram Sita was still indirectly under his protection so the accusation at that time was that just see he is so attached to his wife that even though her character is suspect still he is staying with her so the accusation was not so much about Sita’s character as about his attachment the difference between the two the accusation was that he is so attached to his wife that he although she has stayed with stayed at some other man’s place for so long he is still taking her back so it was a question about his attachment so he actually by sending Sita away he he showed that he was not attached now why is it so important for a king to show that he is not attached because the king has royal opulence with him and the king’s royal opulence means that the king can be attached materially more than anyone else but in the king shows through his example that despite having so much I am not attached and that sets an example of attachment among the followers so it was not at one level Sita was greatly mortified devastated when she was sent away by Ram at the same time she understood she was shattered but she understood what Ram was doing and we may put this in terms of oh Sita had to suffer so much but for Sita the suffering was not just being in the forest the suffering was being separated from Ram and Ram himself had to go through the same suffering Ram did not try to find a substitute for Sita to get away from that suffering so in that sense actually instead of seeing that Ram sent Sita away it was circumstances which separated Ram and Sita and because of which both of them suffered so we could say Ram’s situation in his interaction with Sita in this situation is similar to Dashrath’s situation earlier when Dashrath had to send Ram away Dashrath did not send Ram away because he considered Ram guilty or he wanted to punish Ram or he suspected Ram nothing like that it was the word of honour which he had given earlier to Kaikeyi so it was against his will forced by situation that Dashrath had to send Ram away and that separation it crushed Dashrath also so similarly for Ram when he sent Sita away it was not that he considered Sita wrong and that’s why he sent Sita away rather situations that forced him to do that and he was as afflicted by that separation as was Sita so the lesson that is taught through this is that it’s a lesson of the importance of detachment and at a higher level there are many other levels of understanding also there was a demon who had got a vow that he would never be killed as long as Lakshmi and Narayana are united and he had got that benediction and he thought Lakshmi and Narayana will never be killed but then the Lord arranged in such a way that there are two stories there is one story this is told by Madhavacharya and Mahabharata where he talks about Ramayana also so he says that demon that’s why what happened was that after some time for a few years that Sita was separated but eventually Ram said enough now I want to get Sita back and then he calls Sita back and Sita comes at that time she enters into the earth but he calls Sita back at that time so what happens is at that particular time when he calls Sita back till that time the Devatas are fighting with the demon they are fighting fighting fighting and the moment the demon is killed at that time Ram calls Sita back so there is a higher purpose for that there is also another story that there was a demon who had taken shelter of Bhrigu Muni’s wife and this demon had been terrorising the universe and Bhrigu Muni’s wife in his case of misdirected compassion she said he is under my protection now you cannot harm him so Vishnu and the Devas were chasing after that demon he said no he is not killed now he will wreak havoc over the universe no you cannot be killed so at that time in order to get to that demon Vishnu killed Bhrigu’s wife so it was not Vishnu who did that but it was a mystical power by which it happened that she lost her body of course Bhrigu arranged and Vishnu arranged for her to come back to life afterwards but initially when Bhrigu saw this you caused me to be separated from my wife I curse you you will be separated from your wife so it was a series of previous life connections also because of which this had to be done at the highest level we also saw that understand that there is love in separation is considered the highest expression of love so both Sita and Ram they experienced that highest expression of love highest reciprocation of love in separation so that is the highest level that which we understand Ram Seni Sita so shall we stop here so thank you very much Ram Chandra Bhagwan Ki Jai Srila Prabhupada Ki Jai Gaur Bhakta Vrindaki Jai Tai Gaur Premana Ki Jai Sri Ram Chandra Bhagwan Ki Jai Srila Prabhupada Ki Jai Gaur Bhakta Vrindaki Jai Tai Gaur we also had a similar lecture yesterday evening and we are going to have three more sessions