Ram Navmi class – Learn from Rama’s concern for others’ distress instead of his own distress (Ramayana)

Ram Navmi class at ISKCON. Towaco

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
Today on the occasion of Ram Navami, and let us begin with a prayer to Lord Ram, which actually describes this darshan which we have. So, I will recite the prayer, and you can try to recite after me.
I will first tell the meaning. Dakshine Lakshmano Yasya, on whose southern side is Lakshman, Vamecha Janaka Atmaja, on whose left is the daughter of Janaka, that is Sita, Purato Maruti, Yasya in front of whom is Hanumanji, Maruti, Tamvande Raghunandanam, and to that descendant of the Raghu dynasty, I offer my obeisances. So, kindly repeat.
Dakshine Lakshmano Yasya, Vamecha Janaka Atmaja, Purato Maruti Yasya, Tamvande Raghunandanam. There are few books in the history of the world that have had as much influence on so many people for so long as the Ramayana. And one of the many reasons why the Ram Leela has been so influential is that actually it depicts the divine in a very human context, that God himself descends to this world and then he demonstrates to us how to live in this world.
Lord Ram is known as Maryada Purushottam. So, at the start of the Ramayana, Valmiki Muni asks his guru Narada Muni, is there a person who, what are the ideal qualities of a human being? Is there a person who embodies such qualities? And then in response, Narada Muni briefly tells about Lord Ramachandra. So, I’ll focus on one particular aspect of Lord Ram’s life and what we can learn from it, which actually demonstrates in a very distinctive way, the mood of the Ramayana.
Essentially, the nature of this world, am I audible? Is the voice gone? So, essentially, the nature of this world is that sooner or later we all face troubles. And when troubles come, how do we respond to them? That actually shows the strength of our character. And Lord Ram demonstrates through his own example, how to respond to adversity with dignity, how to respond to unexpected, unjustified reversals with grace, with composure, with maturity.
The title of this talk was Selfless Love Sublimates the Soul. When we talk about selfless love, I’ll talk about how Lord Ram demonstrates selflessness in one of the most difficult incidents of his life. Till that time, it was by far the most difficult incident.
We all face problems of various kinds. Some problems are ongoing problems. It’s like, say, we have a tyrannical boss.
We have a troublesome relative. We have a painful back. These are problems which are there and we just have to get used to them.
And over a period of time, we just know, I can’t do anything, I have to live with this. But there are other kinds of problems which just suddenly come out of nowhere. And when that happens, it’s extremely difficult to deal with it.
Like if a road is bumpy or slippery, we know and we drive cautiously. But we are going on a very smooth road and suddenly there’s a big ditch over there or some big unexpected obstacle comes. It becomes very difficult to negotiate in that.
So, and on top of that, say, we go and meet someone whom we love. And then when we go there, maybe we expect them to pat us. And at that time, when you are expecting a pat, somebody gives a slap.
At that time, it hurts much more. If we know somebody is hostile to us, that person is angry with us, then we expect something harsh. But when we are expecting affection, when we are expecting happiness, and that time when we get angered, when we get attacked, it’s very difficult to deal with.
So I talked about three levels. One is when you are expecting problems, one when you are expecting normalcy, and another is when you are expecting pleasure. So when we are expecting pleasure and we get pain, it’s the most difficult to deal with.
And this is precisely what happens to Lord Ram when he is going to be coronated. For a prince, he is the eldest among the four princes. So he was groomed to become the king.
And when that day comes, he is fully prepared for it in terms of being qualified for it. And that night, in one night, everything changes. Mantara, she poisons the mind of Kaikeyi and Kaikeyi falls for her manipulation.
So the Ramayana can be understood at a literal level where it’s a historical event. By understanding it, by hearing it, we become purified. Ek ek aksharam pumsam, mahaapadraganashanam.
Even great sinful reactions can be destroyed just by hearing one one letter. It can also be understood at an ethical level where we understand right and wrong based on the kind of decisions the characters have taken. It can also be understood at a metaphorical or spiritual level where the characters represent something.
So actually Mantara represents the mind and Kaikeyi is the soul. Ayodhya is the heart. So the mind is insidiously speaking.
This is not good. That is not good. It’s like this.
It’s like that. Kaikeyi actually commits two mistakes. This is of course an entirely different class and I won’t go into that.
My focus is a little later. But actually Kaikeyi commits two mistakes. First is she hears Mantara submissively.
And second is she doesn’t consult anyone else. Sometimes our mind starts speaking something. This person is like this.
This is like this. That is like that. That is like that.
And when we hear that, we get poisoned. How can it be like this? Sometimes you can’t silence the mind. It’s just speaking.
But if the mind is poisoning us about something which we love, something whom we trust, someone whom we trust, then instead of just acting on it, we need to clarify with someone. Unfortunately, she doesn’t do that. That same Kaikeyi who loves Ram like her own son, she starts thinking that Ram is the cause of my greatest distress.
And stone heart, she manipulates Dashrath and forces him to have Ram sentenced to the forest for 14 years and for Bharat to be appointed as the prince regent and eventually the king. Dashrath is shattered, shattered literally. He faints.
I just can’t believe that Kaikeyi could ever speak such a thing. Later on, Kaikeyi also herself doesn’t know what happened to me. How did I do such a thing? The mind can make us unrecognisable to ourselves.
Was that me? How did I speak that? How did I do that? That’s the effect of the mind on us. But at this particular point, she’s totally stone hearted. And Dashrath swoons, comes back to consciousness, swoons again, comes back to consciousness.
The night passes and in the morning, in the morning, finally Ram is called. Actually, Sumantra Hare Krishna. Am I audible? No.
Hare Krishna. So, at that time, Dashrath begs in every possible way. Dashrath falls at the feet of Kaikeyi.
He begs her. If you want Ram, Lakshman, Bharat to become the king, that’s fine. But don’t, I can’t live without Ram.
Don’t send Ram to the forest. Now, Mantra is anticipated. Mantra says that, told Kaikeyi that don’t relent.
Because if Ram is in the kingdom, Bharat will not become the king. The citizens will not allow Bharat to become the king, even if Bharat somehow agrees. You have to send him to the forest.
And 14 years is an adequate amount of time, during which Bharat can establish his popularity. So, Kaikeyi becomes completely cold hearted. So, actually, more often, sometimes we feel if we become too detached, we will become cold hearted.
That is a possibility. Detachment, if it is not properly understood, it can make us cold hearted. But actually, attachment can make us even more cold hearted.
When we are attached to something, we experience emotions only in relationship to that thing. And we don’t experience any emotion in connection with anything else. So, Kaikeyi is only thinking of her becoming the king’s mother.
My son should become the king. And her own husband, how much he is suffering, he is crying, he is falling unconscious. And she doesn’t feel anything for him.
She simply feels as if all this is just a show that Dashrath is doing to try to undermine her resolve. And finally, when Sumantra comes over there, Dashrath is just senseless. Dashrath is dishevelled, tears have gone down his eyes.
He is completely in a dishevelled condition, totally inappropriate for a festive occasion. And then Kaikeyi tells the king, wants to see Ram. Sumantra is surprised.
On such a day, it would be much more appropriate if Dashrath himself go to Ram’s palace. And then they both of them together go to the celebration. He looks at Dashrath.
Dashrath just mutely nods. And then Ram comes. At that time, Ram comes along.
Lakshman, this is behind him, Lakshman comes with him. And Ram comes inside alone. And he is alarmed to see his father in such a desolate condition.
He looks, oh father, what is the matter? Is everything alright? Dashrath Maharaj just has no words to speak. He looks at Kaikeyi. And he says, oh mother Kaikeyi, what is the matter? Why is my father in such distress? Please tell me what I can do to resolve his distress.
Now, when two people are affectionate to each other, they naturally look at each other in their eyes. But when two people are angry with each other, they don’t look at each other also. So Kaikeyi is not even looking at Dashrath.
Ram immediately detects the tension. And Ram says, there seems to be something which is disturbing both of you. Please tell me what it is, what can I do by which to resolve this tension? And Kaikeyi says that the king has something to tell you, but he is afraid of your reaction to it.
And that’s why he is in this condition, unable to tell you this thing. So Ram looks at his father and says, oh father, please tell me whatever it is. Dashrath is still completely shattered.
The same child who had played on his lap, who had taken pride in seeing his precision in archery, he had delighted in seeing his virtue, the child who had dreamt he would be on the throne. Now the same child, he has to tell him to go to the forest. How can he do that? For parents, even if their child is going to some other place for study, to a hostel, the child is going to be comfortable there, but still the parents are worried.
What is going to happen? For a child to go to a forest? He just can’t take that possibility. So when Dashrath remains silent, Ram turns towards Kaikeyi and says, oh mother Kaikeyi, please tell me, what is it that my father wishes to tell? And Kaikeyi says, the king desires that Bharat become the king and you go to the forest for 14 years. Long ago he had given me two vows, but now he is reluctant to fulfil these vows.
And that is the reason for this condition. You, oh Ram, can free your father from this distress by honouring his words. Now, actually to be sent to the forest is a very grievous form of punishment.
Later on when Bharat comes to know about it, Bharat is shocked. When he comes to know that Ram has been sent to the forest, he says, what crime could Ram have committed? Actually banishment is just one level below execution. If you don’t want a person, if you don’t want to kill him, just send him out of the game.
What crime could Ram have committed? So now Ram has committed no crime. And suddenly in one moment his future has changed completely. Not only is he not getting the kingdom, he is being totally sent out of the kingdom.
And what is Ram’s response? Ram’s response is, he says, oh mother Kaikeyi, I always thought of you as my mother. And I thought that you also always treated me as your son. But today it causes me great grief to know that you never actually considered me as your son.
If you had considered me as your son, then for such a trivial thing as a kingdom, you wouldn’t even have to ask my father. You could just have told me and I would have given the kingdom. So Kaikeyi, even such words don’t soften Kaikeyi’s heart.
When Dashrath hears this, Dashrath is even more desolate. He says, no Ram, you cannot go to the forest. So Ram turns to his father and says, oh father, you have given your word.
It is my duty to honour your word. And therefore, I will go to the forest. Please give me your blessings.
After I am prepared, I’ll come back again to take your permission. Dashrath just can’t speak anything at that time. Ram turns to depart.
He shows not the slightest emotion. Normally, when we are in distress, it is at one level natural to vent our distress, to express it. Now, sometimes we think love means being emotional.
So public display of affection is often thought as a symbol of, as a sign of great love. Now, yes, love involves affection, love involves emotions. But at different times, love requires different things.
Sometimes love requires the expression of emotions. And sometimes love requires the concealing of emotions. In the Bhagavatam, it said that when Krishna was going from Hastinapur to Dwarka, at that time all the royal ladies, they felt distressed, agonised, mortified at the thought that their beloved lord was going.
But, it’s okay. So at the same time, when a Kshatriya warrior is going away, especially if the warrior is going for a war or something like that, then if the ladies are crying, that may dampen their morale. So tears at that time are considered a sign of inauspiciousness.
So it described that all these Kaurava ladies, all these Kuru ladies, not Kaurava ladies, we associate the word Kaurava with Dhritarashtra’s side, but actually even the Pandavas were Kauravas. So all the ladies of Hastinapur, they felt tears but they kept the tears in their heart. They did not let the tears come to their eyes.
So sometimes love requires the expressing of emotions and sometimes love requires the concealing of emotions. As I said earlier, if a child is going to a hostel for studying and the mother may be so worried, oh how can my child stay without it? The child also doesn’t want to go. But there is a good educational prospect that the child is to be sent there.
The child doesn’t want to go and then the mother also starts crying. The child also starts crying. The child says I will not go with you.
Now what is appropriate at that time the mother has to do? Emotions are natural, but there is a purpose that is higher than emotions and that purpose is our service, our duty, our responsibility. So Ram is naturally, one’s complete future is changed in one moment. One will naturally be affected.
But Ram is throughout thinking how to minimise the distress of others around him. So selfless love means that actually we are concerned about others and when we are in distress, sometimes life will put everyone of us in distress. When distress comes, sometimes we become distress maximisers.
What does that mean? Because we are distressed, we put ourselves in such a condition that we make everyone around us more and more distressed. So a person who is truly loving, they feel distress, but they will try to be distress minimisers. Yes, there is distress, but why expand the distress? So Ram, although he is actually shocked at what has happened, but he doesn’t express his emotions.
Throughout his incident, he tries to calm everyone down and then as he comes out, Lakshman has been waiting outside and Lakshman is furious. He says this is injustice. What fault is yours that you are being sent out to the forest like this? Lakshman is so angry.
Sometimes in our relationships, we have to choose. One person will say like this, one relative will say like this, another relative will say like this. And the two are opposed.
Which do we do? So Lakshman sides totally on the side of Ram and he says he is so angry with Dashrath that he doesn’t even refer to Dashrath as his father. He says the king has become blinded by lust for his youngest queen and therefore he has lost all intelligence and such a blind king’s command should never be obeyed. Ram becomes very angry.
So Lakshman should never speak such things about our father. He says I was there inside and I saw how distressed our father is. He is not doing this out of infatuation.
He is not doing this getting any pleasure. He is suffering greatly and he is doing this out of obligation because of his sense of honour. He is suffering as much as we are.
Don’t blame him. This requires an extraordinary level of empathy. So Ram, although Dashrath is giving the command that he should go to the forest, Ram does not see Dashrath as the cause.
So now Lakshman is angry. Sometimes when an argument is going on, sometimes you get an argument you can’t defeat. So then what happens? The anger is still there.
So when you can’t defeat, you shift the direction of the anger to someone else. So Lakshman’s anger shifts to Kaikeyi. He says yes.
He says Kaikeyi, how could she ask you to do something like this? This is outrageous, this is unjust. So then Ram says, yes. He says, Kaikeyi’s love, he speaks very harsh words against Kaikeyi.
He says, oh Lakshman, you knew, you know how much Kaikeyi loved all of us. Her love for us was like the flow of the pure Ganga. Lakshman is still furious.
He says, that’s what I can’t understand. How did the Ganga dry up overnight? So Ram replies, that’s why when I heard her speak such words, I understood that there is something bigger happening over here. I felt that this is the will of destiny.
Lakshman is still not very pacified. He replies, it is only cowards who submit to injustice and call it destiny. Heroes fight against injustice.
You should fight against this injustice. Ram replies, oh Bharat, I am not concerned about destiny. I am concerned about duty.
It is my duty to obey my father. And therefore, I will be going to the forest. Lakshman says, whatever it is, how can the king ask you to go to the forest? You will not go to the forest.
You will be coronated. Anybody who comes in between your coronation, they will meet death at the tip of my arrows today. Lakshman is so furious.
He says, even if the king comes in between, he will have to meet my arrows. Ram becomes extremely great. Lakshman, before your arrows can touch our father, they will have to go through my wall.
On hearing this, Lakshman has to cool down. He just realises that Ram is completely fixed. And then Lakshman realises this is inevitable.
He changes his target. He says, oh Ram, I will come with you to the forest. Now here, through it all, Lakshman, Ram, Lakshman, no, sentence is for you, it is not for you.
You should stay here. Let me go to the forest. He says, no, I will always be with you.
I cannot live without you. Through thick and thin we have been together. I will come with you.
He insists. You are not allowing me to defend you here in the kingdom. Let me serve you in the forest.
And they have a loving relationship. So Ram also knows that Lakshman has conceded a lot. Lakshman’s instinct is to fight.
So he has conceded a lot. So Lakshman, Ram also concedes. In every relationship, we cannot always have it entirely our way.
It is always given. So Ram ascends to that. And then Lakshman also prepares.
Now Ram goes first to the palace of Kaushalya. And Kaushalya has been fasting throughout the previous night, continuously worshipping the Lord, praying. In the Lord’s pastimes, there is simultaneous awareness and non-awareness.
So none of the characters in the Ramayana consciously, at least in the Valmiki Ramayana, they don’t consciously depict the awareness that Ram is God. There are times when they come to know about it. But most of the time, they treat Ram like a beloved relative.
So Kaushalya has been praying for auspiciousness to come on her son on the greatest day of his life. And she turns to Ram. She’s been doing some puja and she just turns to Ram to offer him the prasad.
And when he turns, she sees Ram is so grave, so grim. What happened? What happened? And then Ram tells her, based on a vow, based on two vows that the king had given to Kaikeyi, he has decided that Bharati becomes the king and I go to the forest for 14 days. Kaushalya is shocked.
The plate of prasad that she is offering just drops it and falls on the ground. In this ruin. And she comes back to consciousness.
She says, how unfortunate am I? She says, how unfortunate am I? For so long after my marriage, I never had a child. And after doing so many austerities, so many prayers, finally I got a child who fulfilled all my desires. You were a dream come true for me.
And it was only because of you, oh Ram, that I was able to endure the neglect of the king. Although I was the eldest queen, the king neglected me because of his affection for Kaikeyi, who was far junior to me. It was only you who made it all livable for me.
I have lived for the day when you will become the king. Oh Ram, if you go to the forest, I will not be able to. Please, he says, if you are going to go to the forest, I will come with you.
So, now here Ram has to, Ram is constantly thinking of everyone. The king, Kaikeyi is just completely emotionally broken. She says, the king is completely under the spell of his youngest queen.
When she sees that Ram is not ready to take her, she says, I will be abandoned, I will be abused. Please Ram, let me come with you. So Ram again, it is, when we are distressed, our tendency is, whoever has caused us distress, they are such a bad person.
But Ram throughout is put in the position where he has to defend Ashwath. And he tells that actually, the king is in great distress. His dear most queen has turned against him, has betrayed him terribly.
Oh mother, this is the time when he needs you more than ever before. This is the time when you need to be with him. He will need your support.
Oh mother, I will go to the forest and 14 years will just pass like the twinkling of an eye. And in no time, you will be welcoming me back to the kingdom. Now both of them know, 14 years are not going to pass like the twinkling of an eye.
But throughout it all, Ram is simply trying to decrease the distress of everyone. Decrease the distress of everyone. Ram tells Kaushalya that, actually, the duty of a wife is first and foremost with her husband.
The king needs you. Please be with him. And they have to and fro discussion.
But finally, Kaushalya agrees. So throughout all this, what is Ram trying to do? He has to walk a thorny path. But he is trying to remove the thorns from the path of others.
He is by… Now Kaushalya is going to stay in the kingdom. And she can naturally perceive Dashrath as the victimiser. And even if the two of them are together, there will be tremendous strain.
And a lot of hurts over there. So what Ram does is, he completely recasts Dashrath, not as the victimiser, but as the victim. So that Kaushalya can be there with him to support him.
Now he has to go and break the news to Sita. And Sita welcomes him. And as soon as she sees Ram, although Ram is not showing any emotion, but still, he is so gracious.
What is the matter? And then Ram tells her what has happened. And then Sita is shocked. She is not able to speak any words.
So at that time, Ram says, Oh Sita, I will soon have to go to the forest now. I will not be able to take care of my parents. So please, while you are here in Ayodhya, please take care of my parents.
They will need your support. And you will feel pain and separation from me. You will feel tears.
But please don’t cry in front of them. Be a source of shelter for them, not a source of distress for them. As he continues speaking, he tells her, when Bharat becomes the king, be submissive to him.
In front of him, never speak my glories. Speak in praise of him. So as Ram keeps instructing, Sita, slowly she recovers from the shock.
She says, Oh Ram, what are you speaking? If you are going to go to the forest, I will be going with you. My father told me that thick and thin, I am to be with you and I will be with you. Ram says, Sita, the forest is not a place for a princess like you.
Since there in the forest, you often get no bed to sleep. You get no food to eat, no water to drink. The only bed is often the forest cover.
It’s filled with insects and thorns. The only companions at night are the cries of the tigers and the hyenas. The only feelings in the body will be the fangs of hunger and thirst.
Oh Sita, this is not a place for you. Ram says, if you are going to be there, I will be there with you. Ram tells her, Sita, I have lived in the forest before.
When I went to Vishwamitra’s Gurukul, I have lived. You have never lived before. You will not be able to live like this.
Sita says, Oh Ram, I will not be able to live without you. Please let me come with you. Sita almost becomes frantic with fear, with agony, with anger.
How can you consider leaving me behind? Finally, Ram tries to tell her again and again how dangerous the forest is. The forest is not a place for you. Sita then makes a last ditch effort.
She says to Ram, How unfortunate am I that my father married me to a man who cannot protect me. If you had been a hero, you would be able to protect me even in the forest. Ram hears this.
He sees that for Sita, greater distress will be caused by leaving her in the palace than by having her accompany. He says, Sita, if this is your desire, I can see that you will be agonised without me. Therefore, please come with me.
I will be happy to have you with me. I will protect you. My concern was only your comfort.
But I can see you will face more distress if you are not with me. So please come with me. Then Ram goes to the court.
Now by this time, the news is spread all over the palace, all over the kingdom. This was the greatest event of that time in the kingdom and everybody comes and everybody is furious with Mantra, with Kaikai. At that time, some of the citizens come.
The courtiers come and they say, Ram, this is a great injustice, this is a great misfortune. How can you tolerate this? And people talk about positive thinking. We should always see things positively.
Ram gives an amazingly positive reply. He says that I don’t see any misfortune. He says, I see here an opportunity to honour the word of my father and thereby preserve his glory.
I see here an opportunity to placate and please my mother, thereby decreasing the tension in our family. My younger brother Bharat is like my son. He says, what greater joy can be there for me than to see Bharat, to have Bharat enthroned as the king in my presence and ultimately as a king.
We all need spiritual wisdom. Most of us get the opportunity to associate with sages and get spiritual wisdom only at the end of our lives. I am so fortunate that in my youth I will be able to go to a forest and enrich myself with the association of the saints and gain spiritual wisdom from them.
In every direction I see simply auspiciousness. What is there negative about this? This is incredible. What Ram is doing is the citizens love him so much that there can be a mutiny against the king.
But Ram is saying, I have no resentment. I am happy doing whatever is required. And thus, when Ram leaves, he leaves having set everything as peaceful as possible.
Dashrath, when he finally goes to Dashrath to take his leave, Dashrath says, Oh Ram, if you are going to go to the forest, I order that all the citizens, all the soldiers, all the treasury, let it go to the forest. We will make the forest into Ayodhya and Ayodhya will become a forest. And let Kaikeyi and her son rule this forest.
Kaikeyi becomes outraged. He says, when you promise Ayodhya to my son, it means Ayodhya with all its prosperity. Ram will go nothing except his robes.
In fact, he doesn’t even need royal robes. He is going to the forest, he should go with tree bark. When Dashrath hears this, he is furious.
He says, you, oh wicked woman, you are the incarnation of the goddess of destruction who has come in our family to destroy its happiness. He says, because I am bound by my word to you, I am sending Ram to the forest. But I no longer accept you as my wife.
Our relationship ends today. That time Ram tells, oh father, please do not speak such harsh words. Please give me your blessings.
Ram doesn’t say, that’s right, that’s what you should have done. It’s not at all like that. Please give me your blessings.
He just shifts the word. And then Ram falls at the feet of Dashrath Maharaj, takes his blessings and he departs. Dashrath Maharaj runs after Ram and he tells Sumantra, stop, stop, stop.
And Ram is telling, move on, move on, move faster. And then Sumantra is stormed. Sometimes we have two authorities who give two different instructions.
What to do? Sumantra says, he says, Ram, the king is telling me to stop. So Ram says, you know, anyway I have to go. The longer I stay, the greater will be the distress for the king.
Please move on. He says, what will I tell the king? Ram says that, there was so much, tell him that there was so much noise here that you could not hear his calls. Please let us end the agony of the king as soon as possible.
And then Sumantra speeds. Ram disappears into the horizon. And Dashrath is running and he falls on the ground trying to run after him.
At that time Kaushalya comes up to him and picks him up. And they both are looking at the departing figure of Ram, crying in distress. But throughout it all, they are remembering also Ram’s gallant example of how he has been throughout it all, consoling them, strengthening them, doing whatever it takes to help minimise the blow that has come upon them.
So actually all of us, the Lord himself, he descends in this world and through his example, he shows that no one, when they come to this world, they are exempt from misery. Now for us, we can say it’s our own karma because of which we suffer. For the Lord there is no karma.
He is beyond karma. But even then, even he has to go through something. And he shows us how to deal with something.
See the nature of the mind is that it magnifies problems. The more we think of a problem, the problem becomes bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. So somebody say, we meet someone and we greet them and they snub us.
And we get so angry. How dare you snub me like this? And the mind just goes into a revenge fantasy. Next time, in public, in front of everyone, I’ll snub you.
I’ll get back at you. Now the snubbing incident may happen within 5 seconds. And maybe sometimes 5 hours, 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 months, 5 years we are furious.
As soon as we see that person next time, our blood starts boiling. So what happens is, the mind, the problem happens in a few moments. But the mind magnifies the problem.
And how does the mind magnify the problem? By dwelling on it more and more and more and more. If you can just direct our mind somewhere else, then the problem is going to be there. The problem may not go away.
But the problem does not have such a hold on us. And the whole process of Bhakti Yoga is actually meant to create an attitude of service within us. Once, after a class, one devotee asked a question.
He said, when we chant Hare Krishna, Prabhupada told us that we should chant in the mood, please engage me in your service. He said, I am actually afraid of chanting, this devotee said. He said, why? He said, because I already have so much service.
If Krishna gives me more service, what will happen to me? So, I explained that actually, when we are chanting, it is not just engagement physically in service. Krishna is an understanding God. He is not going to expect us to do two things at the same time.
But when you are asking, please engage me in your service, service is more an attitude. Krishna, please let me always have the attitude of serving you. And if we have that attitude of service, we will always be connected with Krishna.
When we have the attitude of controlling, when we have the attitude of enjoying, then control and enjoyment depends on externals. If we are not able to control, if we don’t have what it takes to enjoy, then we get disturbed. We don’t know what to do.
But if we have an attitude of service, then service is something which we can always do. There are some services which we may be able to do, some services which we may not be able to do. But the principle of service is something which we can always abide by.
The forms of service we may or may not be able to do at different times, particular service in a particular form. But when we chant, when we connect with Krishna, when we practise bhakti, it is this principle of service that we are asking to become attached to, to become attracted to. And this principle of service, Krishna, how can I serve you? That is what breaks the dam of resentment that blocks our mental energy.
When things go wrong, the first reaction usually is resentment. Why? Why? Why? Why did this happen? Why did he speak like that? Why did she do like that? Why are they thinking like this? Why is this happening? Now the why question is very often the question that leads to frustration. In real life you start asking, if Ram could have asked, why is Kaikeyi doing like this? Why is Kaikeyi doing like this? Why is Kaikeyi doing like this? The why question very often in life, it just has no answers.
We may find an answer later in terms of some higher plan the Lord has. But at that time, the why question just has no answers. And if we can at that time, if we just keep having that why question, then sometimes, you know, computer hangs.
When the computer hangs, what is essentially happening is there is some programme that is running again and again and again and again. And that programme is consuming all the computer’s power and doesn’t allow anything else to function. And because that is also going on in a continuous repeat loop, then that doesn’t function.
So like that, when we become resentful, that why question goes into a perpetual auto loop. You know, why, why, why, why, why, why? And it consumes all our mental energy. And we just can’t do anything else.
So when a computer hangs, what do you do? Reboot it. Reboot it. So if we just keep thinking, why, why, why, why? We’ll not get any answers.
We just have to reboot our mental computer. Reboot means just change the question. The why question has no answer.
Change the question. How? Krishna, how can I serve you in this situation? How do you want me to serve you, Krishna? Actually, Prabhupada was asked, what is the best prayer that we can offer to Krishna? Prabhupada said that, Krishna, please give me the strength to serve you. Please give me the strength to serve you.
Whatever situation we are facing, if we pray to Krishna for the strength to serve Him, then we will find that we will get the answer. Sometimes as devotees, we become afraid of praying to Krishna. There are two reasons why we become afraid.
One is that we feel, what if Krishna doesn’t fulfil my prayer? If Krishna doesn’t fulfil my prayer, then I will lose my faith in Krishna. So maybe I should not pray to Him only. Or the other is, if we have a misunderstanding about pure devotion.
Pure devotion means we should not ask anything material from Krishna. And therefore, say I’ll not pray to Krishna about this. But then, in both these cases, the essential point is bhakti is developing a relationship with Krishna.
And in a relationship, if, if we are only asking for something. I was in Atlanta a couple of months ago, where one devotee asked a question, if Krishna is like our father, then what is wrong in asking things from Him? A child always asks things from the father, from the parents, what’s wrong? There’s nothing wrong in asking things from Krishna. What is wrong is, going to Krishna only to ask things.
It’s like if you have a child, and a child stays far away somewhere, and a child calls you only when they want money. Otherwise they don’t call you only. Then, that is a very utilitarian relationship.
So, one extreme is at a materialistic level, when we come to Krishna only when we want things from Him. So, actually it is good even then to come to Krishna. In Bhagavad Gita 7.17, Krishna says, all the people who come to me, for whatever motive they are coming to me, it’s good that they are coming to me.
He says, udara. Udara means, He says, they are all large hearted. That they are all charitable.
Sripad Ramanacharya, there’s a very beautiful meaning of this word, udara, charitable. He says, no actually, what is charitable? If somebody is coming to Krishna, just for asking something from them, that is one of the categories of people. Those who come for money, those who come for relief from distress.
Artho, Artharthi. So then, what is the charitable about it? So, Ramanacharya explains that Krishna is so bhavagrahi, Krishna is so hungry for devotion, that even if devotion is offered to Him, in a mixed way, if somebody is at least coming to Him and praying to Him, connecting with Him, Krishna is happy about that. Krishna feels, you are so charitable.
You are so great, you are coming to me. I am grateful to you for that. So, anywhere we come to Krishna, that is good.
At the same time, if we reduce our relationship with Krishna, to the fulfilment of a particular prayer, then, we miss out on the blessings that Krishna can give us. Just like, say, sometimes a child may get infatuated with a particular toy. I say, Mummy, I want this toy.
Papa, I want this toy. And the parents say, not now. No, I want this toy.
No, we’ll get it later, not now. Ah, you don’t love me. You know, children know how to emotionally blackmail their parents.
They may not know that concept, they may not know that word, and it’s not blackmailing, but it’s just that, you know, if somebody says, you don’t love me, it hurts a lot. How can you say you don’t love? So, for that child, what has happened is, that child at that level, they’re just children, we can’t blame them for that. But it’s just that at their level of intelligence, they reduce their parents’ love to that one thing.
The parents may have done 100 other things for them. Maybe doing also. But they think that, if my parents don’t do this for me, they don’t love me.
So, sometimes, we do the same thing with Krishna. And, what happens is, if Krishna gives this one thing, then Krishna loves me. And if this one thing, this one prayer is not fulfilled, then, does Krishna exist also? We start getting doubts.
So actually, when we are going to Krishna, we are praying to Krishna, for worldly things, we want to form a relationship with Krishna. Krishna, I have this problem, and please solve this problem. So, what are the terms of the relationship? Krishna, my intelligence, and your power.
That, you know, I don’t have the power to solve this problem, you have that. So, this is the problem, this is the solution, please implement it now. Now, that means we are trusting Krishna, Krishna is much more powerful than us.
But we are half trusting Krishna. We are trusting his, his power, but not his wisdom. Thinking that actually, Krishna is strong enough to solve this problem, but he is not wise enough to solve this problem.
So, he needs my input. So, Krishna, when we pray to Krishna, he will solve our problems. But often, the way he solves is different from the way we expect.
So, when we pray to Krishna, the problem is not the praying, the problem is reducing the relationship to the praying, and reducing the relationship to expecting that the prayer be fulfilled in the particular. Sometimes, we may pray to Krishna for mangoes, and Krishna may give apples. Now, the basic need is hunger, that is fulfilled.
But if we are looking only for mangoes, we don’t even notice the apples. So, this is what resentment does. Now, we want something to happen in a particular way, and it doesn’t happen, our just mind gets closed.
Now, when one door closes our life, we get so caught in glaring and staring at that door, that we don’t notice that some other door is opening. So, when we have a service attitude, what it does is, Krishna, please give me the strength to serve. So, that means, okay, I can’t go ahead through this door, maybe through this door, maybe through this door.
So, when we pray to Krishna, the best prayer we can, with our intelligence, Krishna, this is the problem I am facing, this is what I feel the solution is. But, whatever happens, please give me the strength to serve you. So, one extreme is, when we are facing problems, we don’t pray to Krishna at all, or we reduce the prayer to its fulfilment in a particular way.
Other is, we think, oh, pure devotion means we should not pray to Krishna for material things. But actually speaking, we can’t become pure devotees without becoming devotees. And devotion means connection.
So, if something is important for us, if we decide, you know, it is our health, it is our family relationship, it is our career, whatever it is, if it is important for us, and if this is material, I will not pray to Krishna about it. It is important for us, it is occupying an important place in our heart. And if we don’t share that with Krishna, then we are not sharing our heart with Krishna.
And Krishna cannot get a place in our heart. So, if something is burdening us, we can share, definitely share with Krishna, pray to Krishna about it. But again, the service attitude means that we don’t make our service conditional to the fulfilment of the prayer.
Whether this works or not, Krishna, I am your servant. I am going to serve you, no matter what happens. And through this attitude of service, we will find that Krishna will work things out better than what we could have planned.
The Lord has plans for every one of us. And when we face distress, that distress is not actually a rejection of the Lord’s love for us. It is actually an opportunity.
It is not that Krishna doesn’t care for us and that’s why we are facing distress. It is rather that the Lord is giving us an opportunity to rise to a higher level of consciousness. I’ll conclude with this point.
I’ll illustrate this with a personal example. About 5-6 years ago, I was in Mumbai, in the Juhu temple. I was chanting early in the morning.
And then I was just walking along and chanting. And somebody had spilled some water over there. So I just slipped on that water.
And I fell and I already had polio in this leg and that leg got twisted completely. So it was a very nasty fracture. It was almost like 3-4th of the leg came out.
So, anyway, so the point was, after that one of my friends, he’s an atheist, he wrote to me and he said, you know, your God could not protect you in His own temple while you were chanting His names. So he says, why do you still believe in such a God? So I wrote a long reply to him. I basically told that experience which I had at that time.
So actually, at that time when I just fell, it was very painful. Somehow for me, the best connection with Krishna is through the Bhagavad Gita. I love to recite Bhagavad Gita verses.
So at that time suddenly I started chanting Bhagavad Gita verses. The pain was so great, I started chanting Bhagavad Gita verses. And then, as soon as I started chanting, it was like, I could feel my consciousness lifted upwards.
I started feeling calm. And then, if I stopped chanting, all the pain came back. It was, the pain was there, but the consciousness was absorbed in the Bhagavad Gita.
I didn’t feel the pain. It took 4-5 hours, we thought it was just a fall, but then we went to an X-ray centre, we did the X-ray, we found it was a fracture, then we went to the hospital, then it took 4-5 hours to reach the hospital, and then I was given anaesthesia after that. But during that 4-5 hours, I was continuously reciting the Bhagavad Gita.
And now, I look back, I have never experienced spiritual taste, spiritual absorption, the sweetness of absorption in Krishna, I have never experienced that much ever before or ever after that. It was not, it was not out of devotion I was chanting, it was simply out of necessity I was chanting. If I stopped chanting, I was feeling pain.
So I started reciting the verses, I stopped feeling pain. I probably recited the whole Bhagavad Gita several times during that time. the point is, I said that this world, so I replied in my letter to him, that letter is also there in my website, do you still believe in God? So, I told him that, actually, this world is a place of misery.
And, scripture tells us that. So, it is not that scripture gives us a false picture, telling us that this world is a happy place, that is what the world is telling us. No, you just buy the shampoo, do this hair dye, just get this dress, get this, you’ll become happy.
Scripture doesn’t tell us that. Scripture actually tells us the truth. This world is a place of misery.
And, he says that, for me, when this distress came, it was simply a confirmation of scripture. That what scripture says is true. But more importantly, scripture offers us another truth.
That is, the truth is, that by absorption in Krishna, we can transcend the misery of this world. mat-cittaḥ sarva-durgāṇi mat-prasādā tariśase If you become conscious of me, you’ll pass over all obstacles by my grace. mad-āśraya-kathā-mṛṣṭhā śruṇvanti-kathayanti-citta-panti-vibhidhā-sthāpā naitān mad-gata-citta-saha Krishna, Bhagavatam, Kapildev tells, that, tapanti-vibhidhā-sthāpā There are many different miseries which come in this world.
But, devotees don’t experience those miseries. Why? mad-gata-citta-saha Their consciousness is absorbed in me. So, it’s like, say, outside it is very cold.
It’s freezing. And, we come in a warm room, where there is heating. Immediately, we feel relief.
Immediately. So, like that, this world is a place of misery. And, as long as our consciousness is caught in the world, we’ll experience misery.
Just bring our consciousness to Krishna. Remember Krishna, chant His name, pray to Him, sing His kirtans. You know, we experience relief.
We experience relief. Something, even atheists, when they come to a holy place, like a temple, they feel some peace over there. They don’t ascribe it to the presence of the deities.
There is something special in this place. We experience some peace, some calmness over here. So, actually, when distress comes in our life, at that time, we can see it as not Krishna failing in His protection, rather Krishna demonstrating the reality of this world, that this world is a place of misery.
But scripture also gives a second teaching, that by absorption in Him, we can become free from misery. And when distress comes, a devotee sees that distress as an opportunity to verify this second teaching of scripture. Now, the first teaching of scripture is this world is a place of misery, which I have realised now.
Now, let me try to take shelter of Krishna and realise the second teaching of scripture. The second teaching is by absorption in Krishna, we can get relief from misery. We can rise above misery.
The specific problem may come, the specific problem may go. But by absorption in Krishna, the misery will go. Misery will substantially decrease.
Substantially decrease. When we absorb ourselves in Krishna, we get this relief. That when a small… Now, we have to understand Krishna’s love for us through gyanachakshu, through the eyes of knowledge.
If we expect that Krishna should… As soon as I pray to Him, whatever problem is there, it should be solved. No, that is not the way things work in this world. Sometimes problems may be solved, sometimes problems may not be solved.
But what Krishna does for us is He gives us the strength to weather those problems. In fact, we can see bhakti, we can see problems as an opportunity to discover how tough Krishna can make us. Without Krishna, without Krishna bhakti, I would have crumbled under this problem.
But because of Krishna’s shelter, I can face this problem. If we actually take shelter of Krishna, we will ourselves get the realisation, yes, there is relief available. So no problem in this world lasts forever.
Just as the pleasures of this world are temporary, problems are also temporary. So the problems will go sooner or later. But if during that time we have taken shelter of Krishna, then our conviction in Krishna’s shelter, in the reality of Krishna’s shelter, in the potency of Krishna’s shelter, in the sweetness of Krishna’s shelter, that conviction will increase.
And that conviction is a far greater blessing than simply a problem-free life. A problem-free life will simply mostly cause us to live at a materialistic level of consciousness, little bhakti, little material life and we’ll just glide along in life and continue on life after life in material existence. But when problems come and we take shelter of Krishna, when we experience the reality of Krishna’s shelter, that will deepen our devotion.
And that deepened devotion, that deepened conviction in the potency of devotion, that will help us weather whatever storms come in our life. And ultimately that will take us beyond this miserable world. So when problems come, it says, we come to the temple and, Krishna, I’m facing this problem, please solve this.
We come to Krishna, but we’re not Krishna conscious, we’re problem conscious. Please, please, please, please solve this problem, solve this problem, solve this problem. But if we become Krishna conscious, we’ll find that there itself is a relief.
And Krishna will give us the guidance how to solve the problem. Now once we become calm, once we become composed, we ourselves get intelligence, okay, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. So, if we pray to Krishna, then the service attitude, Lord Ram demonstrates, He’s God, but He’s demonstrating service attitude.
How can I minimise their misery? How can I minimise their misery? How can I minimise their misery? That service attitude is what enables us to move forward in life. Sometimes when a problem comes, it’s like suddenly we’re in a room and the lights go off. Lights go off, we don’t know what to do.
You know, we make moon, we make curse, we make rant, but then after a few moments, we’ll turn on our flashlight. Our phone will take, we’ll turn on the flashlight. Now flashlight cannot replace the room light.
The flashlight can show us one step ahead. One step ahead. And like that, we move one step forward, the flashlight will show the next step.
We move one step forward, the flashlight will show the one step ahead. And like that, we can move on and we can cover substantial distance. And in due course, the lights will come back.
So like that, sometimes in our life, such problems come that the whole plan we have laid for our life, just is disrupted. It’s like lights go off. What am I to do in my life? At that time, we can turn on the flashlight of our service attitude.
Krishna, how can I serve you? If we have that attitude, Krishna, how can I serve you? See, okay, I can do this one thing. Then we do that one thing. Yeah, I can do this one thing.
I can do this one thing. And gradually, you and me will be able to take steps forward. And eventually, no problem lasts forever.
The lights will come back. The service attitude can help us go through even the darkest periods of life. So when the darkest periods of life come, don’t tell God how big your problems are.
Tell your problems how big God is. Yes, Krishna is bigger than these problems. Krishna will help me deal with these problems.
Let me focus on Krishna. And if we do that, then we will go through these problems. We will grow through those problems.
I will go closer to Krishna through those problems. And we will become stronger to face whatever life sends our way. So Lord Ram demonstrates this principle of how to respond to adversity with dignity.
And by meditating on the Lord’s pastimes, just meditating on them is purifying. But further contemplating the principles that he is demonstrating and trying to in a small way internalise these principles, we can get the fullest blessing of the Lord’s descent in this world. The Lord descends in this world to help us find a way through this world, to chart our way through this troubled world and ultimately come out of this troubled world to His abode.
days like Ram Navami, when the Lord has descended, it is an opportunity to intensely meditate on the Lord, His example, His teachings, and take shelter of Him. Pray to Him that His example, His remembrance, His teachings manifest in our heart and they guide us in our life. And when we do this, then we will always be guided, we will always be sheltered.
Krishna is there with us even now in our hearts. Krishna is with us, but we are not with Him. It is that we are turned away from Him.
But these days are opportunities to turn back towards Him. So I’ll quickly summarise. I spoke about the whole pastime of Lord Ram, how when He faced a devastating loss from the King of the world to exilee, rather than just wallowing in His own grief, He was minimising the grief of everyone else, pacifying even His stepmother, pacifying His father, pacifying His mother, pacifying His brother, pacifying His wife, pacifying the citizens.
Rather than being a misery maximiser, He was a misery minimiser. And love doesn’t mean just expressing emotions. Love sometimes means concealing emotions so that others’ distress doesn’t increase.
I discussed about how when we are faced with problems, at that time if we can pray to Krishna for service attitude. Service attitude in this context means, rather think of our problems, thinking about others. How can I serve them? How can I assist them? What can I do for them? That itself will shift our focus from our mind and the problem won’t get bigger and bigger.
Rather, it will shift to something positive, something constructive. And the problem will stay in perspective. And then when we are faced with problems, Prabhupada said, the best prayer is, Krishna, please give me the strength to serve you.
So if you have specific problems, we can pray for a specific solution. But we don’t reduce our relationship with Krishna through the solution of that problem. And we don’t reject Krishna’s love just because the problem is not solved on our terms.
We stay open to Krishna, however way you want to solve the problem. And we can, of course, share our heart with Krishna. If the problems are there, we can’t become pure devotees without becoming devotees.
So we can share with Krishna. Seek his help, but be open in seeking his help. Not on particular terms, but on his terms.
And when we do that, it is not that Krishna is not helping us when problems are coming. Rather, Krishna is teaching us the reality of scriptural message that this world is a place of misery. And he is giving us an opportunity to learn the second half of scripture that in remembering him, there is relief from misery.
So we have to bring our consciousness to Krishna. Just as a person outside in cold, when they come inside a warm room, they feel relief. In Krishna, in his remembrance, we will feel relief.
And for remembering him, we need service attitude. Mental energy gets choked by resentment. Resentment.
Why? Why is this happening? Shift the question to reboot the computer. Shift the question to how? How can I serve you? And that how question will become like a flashlight. We will take one step, one step, one step forward and eventually the lights will come back.
So rather than thinking how big the problem is, telling God how big the problem is, we meditate on how big God is. Remember, tell the mind that Krishna is bigger than this problem. Don’t worry about the problem.
Focus on Krishna. And through that, the problems will help us to gain conviction in the reality and the potency of Krishna Bhakti. And that conviction is life’s greatest blessing.
So let us conclude with the prayer that we offered at the start of the class. Lord Ram is always with us. Ram Navami offers us an opportunity to remember that He is with us and we need to be with Him.
Sri Ramachandra Bhagwan Ki Jai! Ram Navami Mahamahotsav Ki Jai! Shri Prabhupada Ki Jai! Gaur Bhakta Vindaki Jai! Jai Gaur Premanand Jai! I am OK. It depends on you. OK.
One question. One question. One question.
you were saying that you were saying that when problems come, we should try to absorb our mind in Krishna. So, intellectually, we should think that but in the deep of the moment, your emotions are extremely powerful. But even if you want to do that, even if you want to recite the verses or chant the mantras, you know, it can feel like it’s physically impossible.
So how to actually practically absorb yourself when your emotions are constantly taking you away from you? Yeah. So, when the problem comes and our emotions are dragging us away from Krishna, at that time, how can we absorb ourselves? In the Bhakti Rasamrith Sindhu, Rupa Goswami uses the word called Uddhipan. Uddhipan means spiritual stimulus.
Something that reminds us of Krishna. So, there are many spiritual stimulus. The deities are spiritual, Uddhipan.
The pictures of Krishna are Uddhipan. The devotees themselves are Uddhipan. Shastra is Uddhipan.
Kirtan is Uddhipan. There are many different Uddhipanas, different things which remind us of Krishna. So, just as there are material sense objects, which, there are many different material sense objects in this world, but some sense objects agitate our mind.
They trigger desires within us. That depends on our individual nature. Similarly, in Bhakti, there are many spiritual sense objects.
But there is some which will trigger spiritual emotion within us. So, we have to find out which is the Uddhipan that works for us best. So, for me, it is Shloka recitation.
Verse recitation. So, once I gave a class, I told, you know, if I go in front of the deities, unless I recite some verses glorifying the Lord, I just can’t connect with the deities. So, once I gave a class, I said, we can recite verses and then we can connect with the deities.
And we can meditate that same Lord whose glories we are reciting, that Lord is in front of us. Couple of days later, one devotee came and told me, he says, you know, I tried reciting verses, when I go in front of the Lord, I try to remember the verse, that causes me so much tension that whatever Bhakti is there, goes away. So, I told him that actually, when I said we should recite verses, you know, verses recitation is an example that, you know, verse recitation is an Uddhipan for me.
But that is not an Uddhipan for him. So, all of us, we have to find out what is the Uddhipan for us. For some of us, it might just be a particular darshan of the deity, a particular picture.
It feels so devotional when you hear it. Some of us, it might be a particular kirtan, you know, particular kirtan sung in a particular tune, might be a particular bhajan, might be a particular pastime, might be a particular devotee’s classes, a particular passage from scripture, whatever it is. See, whatever is the Uddhipan with which we can connect strongly with Krishna, we have to cherish that.
We have to cultivate that and we have to keep it very readily accessible for ourselves. So, in a standard way, when emotions are high, we will not be able to connect with Krishna. Because what is happening? The emotions are going in one way and we try to use our intelligence to take it the other way.
It doesn’t work. Emotions are too strong. So, we need to have something which takes our emotions the other way.
So, if there is some manifestation of Krishna with which we are able to connect very easily and we keep that readily accessible for ourselves, in that way, we can redirect our thoughts, redirect our emotions and then, after that, we can do the other forms of devotional service also. So, bhakti is an individual process and we have to individually find out what it is that connects us with Krishna most efficaciously. And when we cherish that, then even amidst problems, we will be able to connect with Krishna.
Even amidst problems, even amidst problems that choke us, that overwhelm us emotionally, even amidst them, we will be able to connect with Krishna. Thank you. So, I think we can’t deny her one more question.
Ram and Ram know when the 14 years passed because they didn’t have a clock. Okay. How did Ram know when the 14 years had passed although they didn’t have a clock? At that time, they were intelligent enough to understand the time just by looking at the sun.
Sun, the moon, the position of the stars from which they could make out time. And of course, He is God. So, He doesn’t need the clock.
He doesn’t even need the sun and the moon. He knows everything. But they all knew time.
At that time, they would not have clocks. But everybody at that time, they could know time by looking at the motion or the position of the sun, the position of the stars. Through that, they could make out the time.