Should we use the sandwich method when correcting others?
Answer Podcast
Transcript
This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
so psychologists often talk about the sandwich method for correction first appreciate then correct and then again appreciate yes that is a very nice way of doing things and basically in any relationship when we appreciate that is like a deposit when we criticize or correct that is like a withdrawal so the relationship will be stable will be strong to the extent the deposit is more than the withdrawal so if sometimes you may do it at that time itself that time itself is good but overall say if you have 10 interactions with someone out of which 9 are positive and 1 in which there is correction then the balance remains positive so it is important that when people are when certain action of people is corrected we should be able to differentiate between the person and the action the action was not right but you are a good person so what happens when we do something wrong and someone tells us this is wrong it is we feel as if we are rejected so this plus minus plus this kind of principle what it does is it helps us to separate the person from the action separate the person from the behavior so I am not I am not rejecting you I am not demeaning you, I am not insulting you you are a nice person you are a good devotee so plus plus part in the beginning and end it reassures the person that we respect them as individuals we respect them as devotees we respect them as valued people and in the minus part is what we separate the person from the behavior separate the behavior from the person and point out that this behavior was was not good was not proper so many times what we do is instead of taking the behavior instead of pointing out the behavior we move from the behavior to a moral judgment to a value judgment somebody has not cleaned their room you are so irresponsible now you know this becomes an attack directly on the person so separating the person from the behavior behavior of the person you just attack that person that just makes it very bad so basically principles like plus minus plus the sandwich principle they are basically meant to make sure that we we validate the person while we are correcting their particular behavior ok