The mind is not the problem – the mindset is

[Congregation program at Longmont, USA]

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
So, thank all of you for coming here today evening.
I am grateful to be here with Sanatana Priyapuru to assist him. He is probably… You know, in India, when Indians go to America and become successful in America, they are considered as success stories. Isn’t it so? Sanatana Priyapuru is a spiritual success story.
He has come a few years before, and he has built a wonderful community over here. I am staying with Tushar Krishna Prabhu, and he is so appreciative of the work that he has been doing over here. So, somehow, in the last two, three visits I came, I was never able to come here.
This time, just yesterday only he coordinated it, and then before yesterday. First time, it’s difficult for all of you also to manage and come. You have weekly program on Friday itself? Yes.
Okay, so that’s good. But on special days, we sometimes do in between the lessons. Okay.
So, I am happy to be here today, and so I will speak on the topic of our mind is not the problem, our mindset is. Our mind is not the problem, our mindset is. So, let me start first by explaining the terms.
The word mind itself is multivalent. Multivalent means it has many different meanings. So, we may use the word mind.
So, for example, we might say mind your own business. That basically means that don’t put your head over here. So, mind refers to your head or your intelligence or your attention or your intervention.
So, give this your full mind. That means pay attention to what is going on over here. So, mind can refer to attention.
Mind can also refer to intelligence actually, to intellect. Einstein was the greatest scientific mind of the last century. So, here the mind refers to intelligence.
Or sometimes, another place, have you lost your mind? Again mind means, why are you talking so crazily? So, have you lost your mind? Mind means intelligence. So, the words are like handles and concepts are like suitcases. So, if you have a suitcase, we access the suitcase with a handle.
Once I was travelling, last time in America, I was just going to the airport and somehow the suitcase fell. Before I went to the airport, the suitcase fell and the handle broke off. So then, we couldn’t, I was told in America, fixing a broken thing is more difficult than buying a new thing.
So, the devotees gave me a new suitcase. And then, when I reached my destination, because I had just had the suitcase and I don’t handle others, other devotees carry my suitcase. So, by the time I came to my destination, I forgot what my suitcase looked like.
So, the only thing I remember that it had a dark black handle. So, then all the suitcases with black handles, we were taking out and looking at it. Is this my suitcase? Is this my suitcase? So, the point is that one handle, the handle is important for holding a suitcase or removing a suitcase.
But the same or similar handle can be there on different suitcases. So, words or terms are like handles. And concepts are like the suitcase.
So, the same term can refer to different concepts and at different times. So, the word mind can refer to intelligence. The word mind can refer to attention.
The word mind can also refer to the non-physical side of a person. In western philosophy, there is the concept of body-mind duality. So, Rene Descartes is a philosopher who proposes Cartesian duality.
We know him more for his Cartesian geometry, we talk about it. So, there is matter which is physical. And there is something beyond the physical which they call as mind.
So, anything beyond the physical is generically referred to as the mind in western philosophy. So, the term is like the handle. And the same handle can be there on different suitcases.
So, like that there can be different concepts that are referred to by the term. So, term is verbal, concept is intellectual. So, the word mind is used in the Bhagavad Gita in a different sense from these three senses.
There are other senses of the word mind also, but I don’t want to make this unnecessarily complicated. But I started with this point to highlight that in different places the mind can mean different things. In the Bhagavad Gita, the word mind is used to refer to an intermediate reality between the body and the soul.
So, the Bhagavad Gita envisions the person, the living being to be having three levels of existence, body, mind and soul. That is like in a computer we may have hardware, software and user. Hardware is like the body, software is like the mind and the user is the soul.
So, the mind is the essential link for the soul to function in the world. Just like if I have a hardware, if I have a brand new computer but without any software on it. I will not be able to do anything with it.
So, I need the software there. So, in that sense the mind is an essential functional link for the soul with the body. And it is through the mind that our consciousness gets channeled into the world and we perceive things.
So, for example, right now you are hearing me and I am speaking to you. So, while hearing, if your thought goes somewhere else, then although your eyes are looking at me, your ears are hearing what I am saying, but you don’t actually see or hear. And sometimes in a class, if a class is going on for a long time, then our mind just wanders off somewhere.
Mind goes for a walk. And then suddenly there is a joke in the class. What was the joke? I also want to laugh.
So, the mind comes back and we have to ask each other. What is the other person? What is the joke? So, what has happened? So, when there is conscious perception that happens, the three things have to be in line. The consciousness, that is the soul.
So, the soul’s energy manifests as consciousness. Just like if there is a light source over there, from the light source a stream of light comes out. So, like that from the soul a stream of consciousness comes out.
And so, for us to perceive anything, the three things, the soul, the mind and the particular sense have to be in alignment. So, when you are hearing something that I am speaking, the ear is receiving the audio stimuli, the eyes are getting the visual stimuli, along with that the mind is the link. And then the soul’s consciousness is there.
So, when the soul’s consciousness comes outward through the mind to the senses, then we observe. And then when observation goes inside, then we perceive. So, now when the mind is not present, when the mind is somewhere else, So, when we use the word, some people are absent-minded.
Now, absent-minded doesn’t mean that their mind is absent. They have a mind. Everyone has a mind.
But their mind is not present where they are present. Their mind is absent from where they are. So, in school sometimes when there is, in classrooms when there is a roll call, who is present, raise their hands.
But then, after the roll of hands, everybody might raise their hands. So, but after that the students may just mentally wander off. They are physically present, but they are mentally absent.
So, the mind is an essential link for us to observe the world and to function in the world. In the Bhagavad Gita, in the 15th chapter, Krishna talks about this essential role of the mind. In 15.9, he says, So, he says, the five knowledge acquiring senses.
śrotram, cakṣuḥ, sparshanaṁ ca, śrotra is what? Chakṣuḥ. Sparshanaṁ. The skin, touch.
Rasanaṁ. Tongue. Rasana is tongue.
And grānaṁ? Nose. Nose, smelling, yeah. So, rasanaṁ grānaṁ eva ca adhiṣṭhāyaṁ manaschāyaṁ.
And all of them are supervised by the mind. viśhayān upasevate. And with all these, the soul pursues the objects in this world.
So, just as we have five fingers, which are centered on the palm. Like that, the five senses are centered on the mind. So, the Bhagavad Gita uses the word mind to refer to this functional unit.
A subtle functional unit that connects the soul with the body. And channels the consciousness of the soul outward to the body and to the outer world from the body. In the Bhagavad Gita, words are often used in two senses.
Like I started with the suitcase and handle. So, there is the word used in a structural sense and the word used in a functional sense. Structural means that what is it made of, what is the structure.
So, the mind is made of subtle matter. This table is made of gross matter. Earth, water, fire, these are gross matter.
So, the mind is subtle matter. It’s structurally. So, it’s a connecting link.
But functionally, the mind does not always act as a connecting link. Functionally, the mind sometimes acts as not a connector but a disconnector. That means, when we are trying to concentrate, instead of helping to connect our consciousness with what we are observing, the mind just takes our consciousness somewhere else.
So, what determines this? We all observe that we sometimes get absent-minded. Our mind wanders off. When this happens, we need to be alert to get the mind back.
And it’s not just a wandering off in the sense of going and thinking of some other things while we are physically at one place. The wandering off of the mind can also be in the sense that the mind goes off towards undesirable emotions, with undesirable ideas, undesirable attitudes. So, for example, some people are very pessimistic.
Whatever situation you present them, as soon as you present the situation, they will say all the reasons why things will not work. Now, at one level, being cautious is good. Being cautious, okay, you are planning to do this, yeah, these are the dangers there, we have to be aware of it.
So, being aware of dangers is good. Being aware only of dangers is not good. If I am driving in a car, I have to be aware.
Is there adequate fuel in it? Is the tire in good condition? Are the brakes functioning? If the road is slippery? I have to be careful. So, I have to be aware of dangers. But if I am aware only of dangers, then I think, oh, what if the brakes fail? What if while I am driving I get a heart attack? Your mind can imagine anything.
And then we end up, if we give in to that, then we become pessimistic, we will become paralyzed. So, the pessimism is an attitude of the mind. This is what I refer to by the word mindset.
So, mindset means that the mind is set in a particular way. It just functions in that way. Now, some people, if they are always pessimistic, will tell you, why do you think so negatively? Even if they admit, yeah, I think negatively, but still that is the way they will think again.
So, the mind is set in particular ways. In the Mahabharata, when Duryodhana is set on the, on antagonizing and angering the Pandavas, and he is cock sure that he will be able to win any war that takes place. And therefore, he is actually out to provoke war.
So, so many sages, so many elders, Krishna himself comes and tries to dissuade him from the devastating fratricidal war that is about to take place. And at that time, Duryodhana uses one argument to defend his course of action. And he says, why are all of you blaming me? I am the way I am because the creator has made me like this.
If anyone is to be blamed, it is the creator who is to be blamed. Now, this is what is in English called as to rationalize. You know, rationalize.
Rationalize is normally spelled as R-A-T-I-O-N-A-L-I-Z-E. Rationalize means to use your intelligence to try to show that something false is actually true. So, it’s basically misusing our intelligence to justify our point.
So, rationalize, you can also spell it alternatively as R-A-T-I-O-N-A-L-L-I-E-S. So, rationalize. So, we tell rational lies to ourselves and to others.
Now, it’s one thing to try to fool others. When we rationalize, we try to fool others. But it’s actually much worse when we fool ourselves.
Sometimes we may think that fooling someone is a sign of cleverness. And if I am going to fool someone, So, sometimes if we fool someone, then we say that that’s a sign of cleverness. But actually, when we fool ourselves, that’s not a sign of cleverness.
Then we actually are left with no hope, no chance for improving ourselves. So, Duryodhana was in this position where not only did he want the world to believe his rationalizations, but he believed his rationalizations. So, he actually believed that he had done nothing wrong.
In fact, he felt that he had, Thank you. So, Duryodhana actually believed his rationalizations. He believed that he would be able to, that this was the way he was meant to be.
And he thought that actually he had been treated unjustly by life. And he was only getting back that which he was meant to get. Many people, especially people or we could say children who are born in well-to-do families, they develop what is called an entitlement mentality.
Entitlement mentality means they feel I am entitled to this. This is what I should be getting. So, the children who are born in not such well-to-do families, if they don’t get some toys, if they don’t get some gadgets, if they don’t get some facilities, they just understand, okay, we don’t have it.
But when children who are born in well-to-do families, if their parents make you 100 things to them, but the first thing they don’t get, then they make a big you and cry, how are you not giving it? They feel as if they are entitled to those things. And that entitlement mentality is not just among children. It can be among adults also.
So, Duryodhana had this entitlement mentality. If you look at the overall story of the Mahabharata, Pandu had renounced the world and gone to the forest. And when Pandu had gone to the forest, neither Pandu nor Dhritarashtra had any children.
So, who was going to be the successor? Who was going to be the heir? Who will gain the kingdom? That was unknown. Then eventually Pandu’s wives begot sons through the Devatas and Dhritarashtra also begot sons. Now, although Kunti’s first son Yudhishthira was older than Duryodhana, Gandhari’s first son, but still at that time it was unclear whether Pandu would come back to the kingdom or Pandu’s sons would ever come back to the kingdom.
Because he had gone to the forest and his wives had also gone and children had also been born in the forest. So, at that time Duryodhana was treated by everyone as if he were the heir apparent. He would be the person who would become the next king.
And he was pampered by everyone. He was treated with great respect by everyone. And he became something like a spoiled child.
Of course, among his hundred brothers he was the strongest. So, he was the eldest and he was the strongest. So, he felt, I am so entitled to.
I am entitled to the honor of being the prince who is going to become the successor king. And eventually when the Pandavas did come back after Pandu’s unfortunate demise, at that time the whole focus shifted. And it shifted not just because of the novelty of these five brothers who had come back, but because of their quality.
So, as far as dharma was concerned, Pandu’s sons were a study in contrast with Dhritarashtra’s sons. You know, Duryodhana was arrogant, impudent. Quite coarse.
Whereas, Yudhishthira in particular and the Pandavas in general, they were all very gentle, well behaved. Now, our upbringing plays a very important role in how we live. So, the Pandavas while they were living in forest actually lived among the sages.
And although they were Kshatriyas, we will see Yudhishthira most of all. Yudhishthira was the eldest and he lived among the sages the most. So, he is a Kshatriya, but he has a lot of Brahminical qualities.
He is tolerant, gentle, non-confrontational, forgiving. So, this was very pleasing as compared to the brashness of Duryodhana. So, Duryodhana felt that all the honor and all the attention that he was getting and that he felt he was entitled to get, that was taken away from him.
And then, when eventually, at least, okay, this Yudhishthira might be better than me in dharma, in conduct, but I am better in strength. But then he found he was not better in strength than another of the Pandavas. Who was that? Bhima.
In fact, Bhima was so strong that when they would play sometimes, they were kids at that time, they would play in the rivers, Bhima would just pick up Duryodhana and throw him away. Duryodhana was enraged out there and Bhima was just laughing. Bhima had no malicious intention, but among the Pandavas, Bhima is the most bellicose.
Bellicose means he has a lot of fighting spirit. So, when he saw something would make Duryodhana angry, Bhima would deliberately do that more. So, Duryodhana was furious.
So, all that he did later, right from trying to poison Bhima, to try to have them burnt alive, the Pandavas, to try to dishonor Draupadi, to eventually have them exiled, the things he did were all devious. It was dastardly what he did. But he felt that he was simply doing what it took to get back the things which were entitled for him, but which were taken away by the Pandavas.
So, in that sense, his entitlement mentality blinded him to the grievousness of his misdeeds. So, this was his mindset where he rationalized whatever he was doing. And, now different people have minds which work in different ways.
That, all minds don’t work similarly, and all minds don’t necessarily work virtuously. But, the important thing is, not how our mind works, but how we look at the working of our mind. How our mind works is important, because it shapes our behavior, it shapes our thinking, it shapes our learning.
But how we look at it is even more important. So, if I rationalize it, if I am somebody who is very domineering, very bossy, just ordering people around, and I’m getting angry when people don’t get ordered around. If somebody tells such a person, you know, you’re a short-tempered person.
He says, I’m not a short-tempered person. He says, it is people who are short-witted. You know, if they did what I told them to do, when I told them to do it, I would never get angry.
So, what is happening? Instead of accepting that I get angry, very expertly shifting the blame to the other person. Of course, it may be that certain things have to be done at certain time, and if somebody doesn’t do it, it’s irresponsibility. But at the same time, every individual is different.
And what may seem very, very important for us, may not seem that important for that person. So, yes, if somebody is not doing things, we have to work out a negotiation so that the things get done. But I cannot blame my anger on someone else’s behavior.
So, when I say that your behavior makes me angry, then what am I doing? I’m basically shifting the responsibility for my anger from myself to that person. Now, it is true that that person may be behaving in an improper way. He may be behaving in a way that is wrong and that needs to be corrected.
But still, if I am prone to be short-tempered, that being short-tempered is my problem. It is not that person’s problem. So, for our emotions, there are triggers and there are causes.
Trigger is what activates the emotion. Cause is what originates the emotion. Trigger is that which activates the emotion.
It’s like if I have a gun, now when I press a trigger, the bullet goes out. And whoever is in the path of the bullet, that person may get wounded or even killed. At the same time, the trigger alone doesn’t cause the wound to the person.
There has to be bullet present inside. If there is no bullet, sometimes in a movie, like a comedy movie, somebody comes and threatens, you know, I’ll shoot you. And he presses the gun and there is no bullet only in it.
And he becomes like a joke over there. So, what happens is, the trigger is simply the stimulator, the activator. The pressing of the trigger is not the cause of the death of the person.
There is a bullet present over there and that bullet went out and because of that the person died. Similarly, others’ behavior is like the trigger. But our own short-temperedness is the cause.
In that same situation, there might be somebody else who may handle the situation very coolly. Same provocation is there, but different people may handle the same situation differently. So, the behavior alone cannot be considered the cause.
The behavior is the trigger. The cause is our own weakness. In the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna talks about selfish desire in 3.36-43. He uses the word kama.
Now, kama can refer specifically to lust or kama can refer generically to any self-centered desire. So, both can be applied. If we say kama refers to lust, Krishna says over there, where is lust situated? He doesn’t say that lust is situated in some object, somebody whom we see and then we get agitated.
He says lust is situated in our own senses, mind and intelligence. Indriyani mano buddhir, asyadishtanam uchyate, etair vimohaya tesha, jnanam avritya dehinam. So, 3.40, he says that these are the senses, the mind and intelligence, this is where lust is situated.
Now, somebody may say, in today’s world there are so many sights which we see, so many aggravating movies are there, so many this is there, so many that is there, because of which our desires get, we get lusty desires. That’s true, but Krishna is not saying that desire is situated there. No, the desire is situated in our own consciousness.
So, yes, if there is something which triggers us, we have to be careful, as much as possible we try to avoid it. But the trigger is not the cause. So, why I am talking about this difference between the trigger and the cause is to talk about our mindset.
So, if my mindset is to justify whatever I am doing, then I will say that the trigger is the cause. Now, you did like that, that’s why I got angry. And if that happens, then there is very little chance for me to improve myself.
Yes, that person’s behavior may need improvement also. That person is irresponsible, that person doesn’t keep their word or whatever. But that is not directly in my control.
What is in my control is my response. And I have a mind right now which is inclined towards getting angry quickly. That is the way it is.
I can’t change it. I can’t change it doesn’t mean that I will always get angry. But I can’t change it means that my mind is inclined towards anger.
That is the disposition of the mind. But that does not necessarily mean that I have to get angry or that I have to justify my anger. So, to illustrate this point once again in a different way, say we have the flower over here.
If the flower is inclined in a particular way, then if water falls on the flower, water will naturally flow in this direction. Now, if I have some valuable electronic items over here, I don’t want the water to flow in that direction. So, what do I do at that time? If I tell, why is the water flowing in that direction? Well, that is not going to happen.
The water is going to flow in that direction. And if somebody tells, you know, the electronic items get damaged and some family member says, Hey, the water has gone over there. No, it has got damaged.
What can I do? The water flew there. I know. The water is going to flow there.
We can’t avoid that in the sense that we can’t change the inclination of the flower. But what we can do is, if the water is flowing in that direction, we can either block it or dry it up or push it in another direction. So, here, the mind, when I talk about the mind is not the problem, the mindset is.
What I mean is, all our minds are inclined in particular ways. Somebody’s mind may be inclined towards anger. Somebody’s mind may be inclined towards greed.
I am only talking about negatives. The mind can sometimes be inclined in positive directions also. Somebody’s mind may be inclined towards pessimism.
Always being worried, always being fearful. Always looking at the dark side of things. Some people’s mind may be inclined towards distrust.
We just have trust issues. Whenever people speak something, we have doubts. So, this is the inclination of the mind.
We are just telling a person, you know, why are you so pessimistic? That’s not going to help because the mind is inclined that way. But at the same time, for that person to say, ok, my mind is inclined that way, that’s how I think. No, the water is by default going to flow in that direction.
But that does not mean that we have to let the water flow in that direction. So, there can be two extremes. One is that just blaming the water for flowing in that direction.
Why is the water flowing in that direction? Why am I so negative? Or other people say, why are you so pessimistic? No, that’s not going to help. The water is going to flow in that direction. So, blaming the water for flowing in that direction is unhealthy.
At the same time, just fatalistically resigning oneself. Oh, the water is going to flow in that direction, those items are going to get damaged, that’s how it is. That’s also irresponsible.
So, both these attitudes. One is trying to resent the way our mind functions. And the other is just surrendering to whichever way the mind functions.
Both of them are unhealthy attitudes. So, we may have either mindset. One is, we just resent, why am I like this, why am I like that? Sometimes some people, they just beat themselves up.
Why am I like this? Why am I like that? Why am I like that? Psychologists call what is self-hatred. Self-hatred means we are just constantly angry with ourselves. Why did I do like that? Why am I like this? Why am I like that? Yes, we want to improve, but a constant inimical attitude towards oneself is not of much help.
So, resenting the way we are, that is unhealthy. And just abandoning ourselves to the way we are, that is also unhealthy. So, we have to accept my mind is like this, but my mindset should be, ok, if the water is flowing in this direction, this is undesirable.
So, what can I do to stem that flow? I can’t suddenly expect that the water will not flow in that direction. The water is going to flow in that direction. But what can I do to stop it from flowing? So, Duryodhana is characterized by this mindset, this is just the way I am.
And that’s why when he rationalizes the way he is, he loses all hope of changing himself. Now, how do we, once we understand, ok, this is the mind that I have. Why have I got this mind? It’s by my own past karma, it’s by my own past choices.
Past can refer to this life or a previous life. Whichever way we have lived, I’ve got this right now. But what can I do about it? We can change.
We can change. So, the two things are required, our willingness and God’s power. There’s a whole elaborate session we could have on how we change, but I’ll just focus on these two points.
Our willingness. Our willingness means when the water starts flowing in this direction, I push the water back in that direction. So, Krishna talks about this process in the Bhagavad Gita, in the sixth chapter, in verses 25 and 26, when he states that wherever the mind wanders, get it back.
यतो यतो निष्चलति मनष्चन्चलम अस्थिरम् ततस्तोन्यं यथत आत्मन्येववशन्नहे He says, wherever the mind wanders, get it back. So, the mind may stray away, but don’t let it stay away. It may stray away, it may go in a particular direction, but that doesn’t mean I have to let it stay in that direction, I can get it back.
So, Krishna says this is mechanical, this is our willingness. Okay, the mind goes in that direction, I start getting angry with someone. And then, as soon as I notice, oh, I got angry.
What is it? It’s not worth it. Why should I get so angry? So, we are willing to change. Our willingness means when the thoughts go in that direction, as soon as we become aware, we bring it back.
We bring it back. And this is where actually the process of Bhakti Yoga helps. Sometimes when we chant the holiness, when we study scriptures, when we worship the deities, we find that the mind wanders so much.
But what is the use of this chanting if the mind is wandering so much? No, even then it is useful because we are at least becoming aware that the mind is wandering. There is a Maharashtrian saint, Tukaram Maharaj. Once a person asked him, you know, he says that, you know, my mind, when I try to chant the names of God, the mind wanders so much.
So, what should I do? He says, the mind may wander, why do you have to wander with it? That means the mind has its tendency. The mind will go in that direction, wherever it wants to go. But as soon as you become aware, oh, it’s gone in that direction, get it back, get it back.
So, our willingness. So, an example to illustrate this could be that a mother and a child. The child is going to be restless.
The child, if the mother tells, okay, you sit down here peacefully. Mother says, I’ll go and do some housework. After 10 minutes if the mother comes back, the mother will actually be surprised that the child is sitting there peacefully.
That’s not the way children work. So, the mother has to expect the child is going to be restless, child is going to here, going there. Sometimes children are mischievous.
Sometimes children are not just mischievous, you know, they are dangerous. If they are mischievous, they may take some sharp items and try to play with them. They may just peer out of the windows.
They may fiddle with some electrical gadgets. So, now, going back to the earlier point, one is that we resent the mind or we just abandon ourselves to the mind. So, the mother starts resenting, you know, why are you so restless? Let’s suppose the child is going to be restless.
But at the same time, the mother cannot abandon, you know, you are like that, just be like that only. No, the child will not be restless. So, what does the mother do? The child, mother keeps watching.
Mother has her work to do, but she keeps watching. The child goes out and gets back. Again the child goes out and gets back.
That is our willingness. So, our willingness has to be there to get the mind back wherever it goes. Now, we may say, how long can I keep doing this? Okay, the mind goes off, I get it back.
It goes off, I get it back. How long can I keep doing it? Actually, the same mind which keeps going off, it also tricks us. By making us believe that the struggle is going to be for so long that we better give up the struggle right now.
So, now our problem, we shouldn’t worry so much about how I will resist the future distractions of the mind. Because in the world there are so many distractions that may come, so many misdirections may come. Our worry needn’t be what all distractions may come in the future and how I will deal with them.
Our worry can just be how can I focus the mind right now. As right now, if I just focus, what happens with the mother is that the child grows. And as the child grows, the child’s intelligence also develops.
The child matures. And then the same level of control that the mother has to exert on the child, the mother doesn’t have to exert. Child grows up, becomes responsible.
The mother may initially have to study. As the child grows up, the child himself becomes a teenager, becomes an adult. Then the child takes up the responsibilities.
The child has grown up. So now, in the case of our mind, whereas the child grows up automatically, the mind does not grow up automatically. That is where God’s power comes into the picture.
It is God’s power that actually causes the mind to grow up, that transforms the mind. So, our willingness is one part of the process. If the mind goes off, I get it back.
Mind goes off, I get it back. So, for example, the floor is inclined in this way, the water goes this way, I just get it back. It goes off, I get it back.
But suppose, there is some architect or some floor mechanic or somebody, this water is going like this, that person comes and reconstructs the floor. The floor, instead of being inclined this way, becomes inclined this way. Then the water, instead of going in undesirable direction, will start going in the desirable direction.
So, this reconstruction of our mental floor happens by Krishna’s grace. So, when we keep practicing bhakti consistently, then it is at one level a mechanical process. The mind wanders off, we get it back.
The mind wanders off, we get it back. But it is not just mechanical. Because Krishna is observing.
And Krishna observes and as we keep getting the mind back to him, as we keep getting the mind back to constructive things, the mind’s tendency changes. Now, many of us may have experienced that say, before we started bhakti, the same problem had come, and that problem would have just shaken us, shattered us. It got us so worried, so paranoid, so paralyzed.
But after we start practicing bhakti, the same problem comes. It is there, but we don’t get so disturbed by it. Okay, Krishna will take care, let me see what I can do.
So, what happened is, that same problem is there, but now, our mindset has changed. Instead of just getting into a frenzy of worry, we are calmer. We are able to deal with it better.
So, just like if a small child, if a 20 kg weight is put on the child, the child just gets crushed. But if an adult, 20 kg is put, they may be able to lift it up. So like that, when life’s problems come upon us, the problem may be just some bad thing happens, somebody makes us angry, the problem may be that we lose our job or whatever it is.
The problem is there, that’s like a sudden burden comes on us. What happens as we keep practicing bhakti is, our mind grows up. When the mind grows up, that means, the capacity to endure the negativities of life increases.
And that’s how bhakti helps us grow up. So, one side is our own willingness, the other is God’s power. So, by Krishna’s power, whatever negativities, we may have anger, we may have lust, we may have greed, we may have negativity, we may have various aspects, we may have pessimism, whatever it is, we may have, those will change.
And, when that change happens, the same series of verses Krishna talks about, 6.24, 25 I talked about, 25, 26, Krishna later says, So, he says, the mind will become peaceful. And then, when the mind becomes peaceful, the yogi experiences supreme happiness. The agitating force within the mind, that becomes calm.
Brahma bhoota kalmasam We understand ourselves as spiritual beings. At our core, we are pure, uncontaminated by any of the negativities of the world. Akalmasam We are pure.
So, this understanding is profoundly transforming. Of course, the transformation will come eventually, and that is wonderful. But this understanding, that by our own willingness to change, and by accessing God’s power to change us, we all can change ourselves.
So, the mindset, that is the problem is, to either, is to just resent the way we are, or to abandon ourselves to the way we are. We change that mindset, whatever is my conditioning, it can be changed. And I am willing to work for changing it.
We change that, then our particular mind, even if it is inclined in a particular way, it doesn’t matter. As I said, somebody may be pessimistic, but pessimism itself is not always a problem. It’s good to be aware of dangers.
Some people, in the name of being optimistic, optimism is good to see the bright side of things. But some people may be so optimistic, that they don’t see a ditch right in front of them. You know, in English, it’s called Pollyannaish optimism.
Pollyanna means a person who is so optimistic, that person is blind to obvious dangers. So, in this world, there is nothing, which is necessarily a bad thing. Even getting angry is not a bad thing.
There are certain things, which are worth getting angry about. But, that anger should be a conscious choice. It should not be a default reaction.
This is something important. I want to give a message over here, and that’s why I am going to speak strongly. It’s a conscious choice.
Sometimes, some people, who never get angry about anything, you know, it’s not always a virtue. They may just, you know, a hundred things may go wrong around them, and their lack of anger is not because they are so transcendental. Their lack of anger is because they are so irresponsible.
They just don’t care for anything. So, anger can also be a sign of care. But, anger is not the only sign of care.
You know, because I care, I will get angry. But, if I just get angry with the other person, then that person will not see my care at all. You are always finding fault with me.
You are always nagging me. Then, there will be a problem. So, whatever we consider as negative, it need not always be negative in life.
So, to see the dark side of life, that is also good because it helps us to be cautious. To get angry, that shows that we care for some things. So, the balanced way to use our default tendencies, whatever default tendencies we have, they can be used in a balanced way.
But, for that, we need to distance ourselves from that. Rather than rationalizing it, we need to identify it. This is how I am and then, yes, this is the way I work.
I do get worried about things too much. Okay, that worry is good, but I will keep it proportionate. Then, we can use the way we are in a constructive way.
See, ultimately, if we treat our mind itself as a problem, that’s not going to work. Because, as I said, the mind is essential for us. Our mind is the only mind that we have.
We can’t get another mind. This is the mind that we have. This is the mind we have to live with.
This is the mind we have to use. So, this is the mind we have. So, what we need to do is, the mind has a particular tendency.
We don’t justify it, we abandon ourselves to it. We don’t resent it, nor justify it. But rather, we observe it, and when it is wrong, we correct it.
When it is usable, we use it. This way, when we work, then gradually, the same mind, which we thought was the cause of so much trouble, can actually become our friend. And this is what Krishna says, that when the mind is controlled, it becomes our friend.
bandhur ātmātmanastasya yenātmaivātmanājitāḥ The mind becomes a friend for one who has learned to control it. And that control over the mind comes through the process of bhakti. So, I’ll conclude with one last example, that we may say, but I can’t control my mind.
I don’t have the capacity to control it. Yes, we may not have the capacity to control the mind fully. But we have some capacity to control the mind.
Say, for example, I’m sitting for a one-hour class. I can’t concentrate for a one-hour class. When is this class going to end now? It’s too much.
Guys, I got an overdose of philosophy today. You know, I feel like that. Okay, one hour, it may not be possible.
But five minutes, I can concentrate. Five minutes, I can concentrate. So, we have some capacity to control the mind.
And we use whatever capacity we have to control the mind to fix it on the supreme controller. To fix it on the supreme controller. So, there can be hundred things in our life which may go wrong and which will provoke us.
And if we try to anticipate and prepare for all of them, you know, in this situation, I want to choose right. In this situation, I want to choose right. We’ll get paralyzed.
We can’t even anticipate what all will come in our life. But, if you just focus on choosing Krishna, that means, when I am practicing bhakti, with whatever little control I have over the mind, I’ll focus on choosing Krishna. Now, choosing Krishna is the one choice that will enable us to make many other good choices.
Because when we are practicing bhakti and when we are choosing Krishna diligently, consistently, what will happen is, Krishna’s grace that is coming to us, Krishna says, I will give you the intelligence by which you can come to me. So, in that way, whatever little control we have, we use it to fix the mind on the supreme controller. And then, He will help us control the mind.
He will help us to change the mind. It’s like if we have a lever and if I have to lift a 50 kg weight, it’s very difficult. But if I have a lever and I put the weight on the other side of the lever I have to put a little force and that weight goes up.
Because that’s the lever’s mechanism that helps me. So, bhakti yoga is like that lever. Now, we focus, if we have to control everything, every problem in our life and every response to that problem, that seems like a formidable task.
But we focus on practicing bhakti. It’s like applying pressure on the lever at the right point. That which is very difficult to get lifted, to lift, it becomes liftable with a lever.
So, like that, if we just use whatever control over the mind we have to practice bhakti diligently, that will help us to control other situations, to control the mind in other situations, to make the right choices. So, we have to make, do our part, We try to practice bhakti as well as we can So, this is the dhami buddhi yoga I will give you the intelligence by which you can come to me. So, I’ll summarize what I spoke today.
So, I spoke on the topic of the mind is not the problem, the mindset is. So, I talked about how the mind can mean different things, attention, intelligence, the non-material side. So, the terms are like handles.
They are verbal and the concepts are like the suitcase. They are intellectual. And in the Bhagavad Gita, the word mind is used to refer to the connecting link between the body and the soul.
So, the mind is the medium through which the soul’s consciousness comes outwards and perceives. So, perception happens when the consciousness, the soul, the mind and the sense are in a are in a straight line. But sometimes the mind just goes off in other directions.
It doesn’t allow us to perceive the reality as it is. It distorts our perception of reality. So, how do we deal with? So, this tendency of the mind to go off in certain directions is the mindset.
Some people may be pessimistic, some people may be short-tempered, some people may be fearful. So, this pessimism, short-temperedness, fearfulness, this is the tendency of the mind. And such people may blame others, you know, because you behave like this, so I got angry.
So, we have to understand that others’ behavior is the trigger, not the cause. The cause is my own short-temperedness. And the other person, somebody is triggering me, I have to be careful.
I don’t want to get triggered. But I can’t blame the other person. So, Duryodhana did this.
He was himself greedy, envious, vicious. But, because he had grown with this entitlement mentality, thinking that he was meant to be the prince, the heir apparent, when the Pandavas came, he felt that they had usurped his right. And that’s why he rationalized all the horrendous things that he did.
Saying that, I was just doing what was my nature. No, it was not the way God made him. It is, first of all, it is not God who has made our mind the way it is.
It is our own past karma that has made it. And God has given us the free will whether to just go along with the mind or to work to change it. So, when we rationalize, then we are saying rational lies.
When we lie to others, that’s bad. But when we lie to ourselves and we believe our lies, then we become irredeemable. Then there is no hope left for us to ever improve.
So, Duryodhana fell in that category unfortunately. So, the unhealthy mindsets can be, one is, we resent the way the mind is and hate ourselves. Why am I like this? Why am I like this? No, this is the way I am.
I have to accept it. But accepting it doesn’t mean I resign myself to the way I am. The other unhealthy attitude is just abandoning myself.
The healthy attitude is I accept that this is the way I am going to function but I work to change it. So, the flower is inclined in a particular way, the water is going to flow in that direction. So, then I anticipate that and I correct that.
I push the water back again. So, a mother who is dealing with a child has to expect the child’s restlessness. And she can’t just let the child do whatever it wants to do nor can she resent, why are you restless? She has to, child goes off, get back.
The mind may stray away but don’t let it stay away. And then for changing the mind, changing the mindset basically, there are two things, our willingness and God’s grace, God’s power. So, our willingness means the water flows in this way, push it back.
That’s what we do mechanically. But Krishna’s grace is that he transforms the inclination of the flower. Or rather, like a child grows up, so mind doesn’t grow up automatically but by the process of bhakti the mind grows up and its inclination changes.
And this is, when this inclination changes then the mind becomes our friend. For this to happen, we need to connect with Krishna consistently. So, we may not have the power to constantly control everything that happens in our life or every response but it’s just like a pressing a lever to lift a heavy weight.
If we focus on whatever little control we have to fix the bindings with Krishna as much as we can, then that connection with Krishna will give us the intelligence to choose wisely when provocative stimuli come in our life. So, we may be crushed by a particular problem before we start practicing bhakti. After we start practicing bhakti, the problem still comes, it’s still a problem but we don’t get crushed by it, a grown-up child doesn’t get crushed by a 20 kg weight or a 40 kg weight.
A small child gets crushed, so like that our mind grows up. And connecting with Krishna is the one choice that will enable us to make many otherwise choices. And then by Krishna’s grace and our willingness, when the mind becomes changed, when the mind’s inclination becomes positive, then our life becomes joyful.
Thank you very much. Hare Krishna. So are there any questions or comments? It was a very nice class, Prabhupada.
I really appreciate your presentation and I always listen to your lectures. Really I was very happy to listen to your lecture today. My question is, in the Bhagavad Gita it is said that whatever past karmas are there, according to that we get the mind or the body or the soul, whatever it is there, or we get the karmic reactions.
So at least means whatever past lives have gone, it is a good thing that we have forgotten those things because of the rebirth. But in this lifetime, whatever baggage we are carrying, whatever the bad emotions or whatever bad things or the good things, it may be both the things, good or bad. But sometimes what happens, we ladies specially suppress our emotions and we keep all the emotions under control.
But sometimes the situation comes that it triggers the mind in very resentful way. So in that thing, I don’t want to carry the baggage of this life, whatever bad or good karma, to next life. You said that Bhakti Yoga is there to help.
That is one thing good. But still, as I am really an old person here, sometimes what happens, all those bad or good things comes to our mind and the videotapes run in your mind. So we are not able to delete those bad things.
How much we try, though we are connecting to Bhakti Yoga, we are connecting to this thing, so how to stop this thing that I don’t want to carry this burden to the next life. So what are the suggestions you will give to us? So if we have certain baggage from our past, which creates resentment and we try to suppress it, but then it just expresses itself in ugly ways. And we don’t want to carry this baggage to the next life.
So how do we deal with it? How can we become free from it? Firstly, suppressing is not the solution. Normally we think of our emotions in two ways. Either expressing them or suppressing them.
But there is a third option, that is processing them. Processing means that especially when the emotions are there, that time they just overwhelm us. And that time we just have to know, I am not going to get angry.
I am not going to speak anything. Just stay silent at that time. But the emotions are there and we can’t wish them away.
So after the heat of the emotion has gone down a little bit, objectively evaluate it. So okay, this person did like this. How could she have done that? How could he have done that? How could he have spoken like this? We feel angry, but then if we objectively evaluate it, we find, okay, maybe it was like this.
I didn’t think of it like that. So I, as an author, I correspond a lot with people on emails. And I was, before I came to Bhakti, I was a very short-tempered person.
I had a lot of anger within me. So whenever I get angry, I just write an email. But then I made a strict policy not to send that email for 24 hours.
If I don’t write it, I feel like a burning sensation within. But if I write it, that person will feel a burning sensation. If I write it and send it.
So I find a medium way. Just write it and keep it there. And sometimes in 24 hours itself, that person writes with some more information which clarifies the situation.
That person apologizes. Or some other thing happens which actually resolves the issue. Or sometimes after 24 hours, I look back at it.
Then I find, okay, this, I’m just being too harsh over here. I need to reword this. And this, I don’t really know.
I’m assuming that person’s intention was like this. See, what we see is people’s actions. And from their actions, we assume their intentions.
But we don’t know what their intention is. So we may feel, okay, I need more information to understand why this person spoke like this. Sometimes this is a valid point.
This is a concern which I need to address. So then I’ll write that. So then I edit that email and I send it.
And then often issues get resolved. Some relationships may just not work. But we have to do our part.
So when we process our emotions, then what happens? We have a healthy channel. It’s not just impulsive expression. Nor is it repressive suppression.
But healthy expression of the emotions. And by this healthy expression, we can deal with them. So if somebody has hurt us, we need to deal with that hurt.
Ideally, if we can deal with that person and resolve that issue, that is the best. There is one devotee Mataji, Sangeeta Mataji, she has written a book about dying in Krishna Consciousness. She is a hospice care medical person.
She has given examples of how people who are about to die, they often need emotional closure. That means, say, some person, the doctor said, this person is not going to live now. But still, say, if it’s an elderly man who has had a big quarrel with his son, and then he wants the son to come back and they just have some cordial words, they just patch up.
Till that happens, the person just hangs on. And then when the son comes, they talk, they just have a few words. Then, when the emotional closure happens, then the physical closure also happens.
So, we do need emotional closure. And now, how that emotional closure will come will vary based on relationship to relationship. Some relationships, you know, we just take a more humble position, we approach that person and we try to clarify.
And then sometimes that person also clarifies, you know, okay, I didn’t mean like this, but this is what happened. And then the issue gets resolved. In some situations, in some relationships, the incompatibility is too much, or sometimes the other person is just so inflexible or unreasonable that no reconciliation is possible at that particular time.
So, still we need to heal ourselves. And after processing the emotions, okay, this was the mistake which I made, this was the mistake that this person made, and now I am trying to rectify it, it’s not worked out. Then we just as a mental act choose to forgive.
So, now forgiving is not just emotion, forgiving is also a decision. That means what? That okay, you did like this, but I am not going to hold this in your face for the rest of my lifetime. You did that, and that person has no intention to change.
That person has hurt us, and the person wants to keep hurting us, and that person is not at all ready to reform. Then we may just decide to create a safe distance. We create a safe distance, we don’t interact with that person, but we decide, this is whatever has happened, it is because of my past karma, it is because of this person’s conditioning, and it’s a chapter which I close in my life.
Forgiveness does not remove the hurt of the past, but it creates a new way of remembering the past. That means we see that as not just a painful experience, but we see that as a learning experience, as a growing experience, as experience for learning and growing, and we move on. So, it’s like suppose I have some festering wound on my body, as soon as I touch it, it causes pain, but once that wound is healed, sometimes some wounds after healing also, they leave a scar.
So, the scar is there, but even if I touch it, it doesn’t cause any pain. So, like that, as long as there is no forgiveness, the wound is like a festering wound. Every time there is a touch, it causes pain.
But once we decide, okay, this person did like this, whatever was the reason, I am not going to hold this in my life. Anger, resentment, all these keep us locked in the past. Forgiveness is a decision that this is a chapter of my life which is over.
I am going to close this page and move on. So, once we do that, basically that means that we give up our emotional involvement in that. As sometimes, we just have to accept that some relationships are not going to work.
We try, it’s not that just 2-3 problems come up and we say that, we call it quits. It’s not like that. We try our best.
We give time for healing. But if some relationships don’t work, then we just have to move on in our life. They have their life, we have our life.
So, once we decide to forgive, forgiveness means what? We just stop being emotionally invested in it. We stop expecting that person to apologize, to correct. You understand, this is a closed chapter in my life.
Let me close it and move on. So, then once we are no longer emotionally invested in that, then that is when the wound heals. The scar still remains.
But the scar doesn’t hurt. The festering wound, even slight contact hurts. That’s why when I said forgiveness creates a new way of remembering.
That means the wound has now become a scar. It is there. It’s not it’s not entirely, as you said, it’s not deletable.
That whatever has happened is there. But as long as we are emotionally fixated in it, it will hurt. And see, not emotionally fixated in it, we will see, okay, this happened to me, but it’s not something that is really hurting me now.
It is there. The impact is there. The scar is there.
We just learn to move on in life. So, this forgiveness, there are various ways in which we can do it. As you know, Jesus told that forgive others the way your Lord has forgiven you.
So, we can look at ourselves and we have the opportunity to practice bhakti, to connect with Krishna. We also have our own deficiencies. And Krishna has tolerated us.
Devotees have tolerated us. Our loved ones have tolerated us. So, when we look at that, what happens is we often look at some relationships where we don’t get reciprocation or we get frustration.
Why is this person doing like this? But we can also look at some other relationships where actually we get more affection than what we are putting in. We don’t do so much for that person, but still that person offers us so much care, so much affection. There are relationships like that also.
So, in the overall, we can say there is a balance. Okay, I got some frustration in this relationship, but I got something more in this relationship. So, that way, we can look at the overall picture of our life and get that forgiveness.
So, once I was giving a class and I was telling that, when we practice bhakti, we have to tolerate many things. So, what are the things we have to tolerate? So, one devotee raised his hand. Yes, we have to tolerate devotees.
So, I said, yes, that is a good realization. We should learn to tolerate devotees. And I said, as we advance, we will also realize that devotees are tolerating us.
So, it works both ways. We have our condition which devotees tolerate. So, when we see this, this person caused me so much hurt and I had to endure that.
But then, we were, our own conduct may also hurt someone else. Others have tolerated us. So, if we see, if we let our emotions get fixated only on one person, then we will be frustrated.
But if we see a broader picture of life, we will see that, you know, there is, there is some places which relationship work out well, some places don’t work out well. So, then we take forgiveness as a decision. Especially if we are practicing bhakti, then we get, see bhakti is not just about connecting with Krishna.
It is important to connect with Krishna. But we connect with Krishna through all our faculties. And the analysis which I talked about right now, processing of our emotions, that can also be done in a devotional mode.
Because it is Krishna who has given me the intelligence and I am using the intelligence to remove the emotional blockages that are stopping me from connecting with Him. So, this can also be done in a mode of service to Krishna. And in general, the more we strongly connect with Krishna, the more we become emotionally sheltered in Him.
The more we are emotionally sheltered in our vertical relationship with Krishna, the less we become emotionally dependent on others. In one sense, when we are resentful to someone, we are still emotionally fixated in that person. So, it’s one thing, you know, we may have very great love towards someone.
And in your world, duality comes. Love goes to other extreme of hatred. And hatred is unhealthy.
So, sometimes, especially in relationships where we have been wounded, we can’t, it’s too much to expect us to be positive in that relationship. A reasonable state is just to be indifferent. Udasi na udasi na.
So, hatred is undesirable. And we can’t be affectionate. That person has hurt us or disappointed us, betrayed us.
Just be indifferent. Now, our emotional shelter comes in Krishna. Our emotional fulfillment comes in other relationships.
And this relationship, just close the door. Close the door. So, closing that door comes by processing of our emotions and by making the conscious decision to forgive.
Forgiveness means we disinvest our emotions from that relationship. And then we can move forward in our lives. Does this answer the question? Thank you.
Hare Krishna. Yeah. One question related to, thank you for helping us with this.
In context, forgiveness you were talking about. I was just thinking, the Shishupal episode with Lord Krishna. So, you know, too much of forgiveness, does it create a weakness in us? Is there? Too much of forgiveness, does it create a weakness or should we have a limit of forgiveness? Okay, good question.
So, does too much of forgiveness create weakness? See, forgiveness can take different forms. On my website, thespiritualscientist.com, there is a full article on Is Forgiveness Practical? So, broadly, there are three situations. There can be many multiplicities in this, but three broad possibilities.
One is that somebody has done something wrong and it’s a one-off incident. And then we forgive and we forget. And we move on.
So, that is just a mistake that they made and we move on in the relationship. The other is that we forgive, but we still have to check whether that person has rectified. So, sometimes we equate forgiveness and trust.
The two are not the same thing. See, forgiveness is for the past, trust is for the future. Forgiveness is something which can be given, but trust has to be earned.
Somebody has done something terribly wrong, then we may forgive them for the wrong. But that does not mean that we automatically bring them to the same level of closeness which we had earlier. They might hurt us again.
So, trust is something which they have to earn by their actions. So, when we forgive, that means, I will not hold the past against you. But still, whether you are trustworthy or not, your actions will show.
So, that is, first forgive and forget means that chapter is over and we bring the relationship to a healthy level. But there is forgiveness, but not trusting. That is where we wait and watch.
How does this person behave? Is this person really changing? That person may have said, I want to change, may have apologized. So, certain amount of distance, greater distance may be kept in that time. Because as I said, trust has to be earned.
And then, in some situations, it may just be that a person has no intention to change. And then we may have to take the necessary actions. So, we may just cut off the relationship.
See, Krishna was in the position of Kshatriya. As a Kshatriya, he had the administrative, legal power. And as I said, he took assertive action against Shishupal or other demons also.
So, that’s what may be required in certain situations. But in our individual relationships, we may just decide, let’s finish this off. So, sometimes some wrongdoings may be so grievous that somebody may decide to take some legal actions or whatever.
That’s also fine. Forgiveness as an action and forgiveness as an emotion, they are two different things. Forgiveness as an action means that, whatever it is, I will not hold this against you.
And you are forgiven. Let’s get the relationship back to normal. If somebody, say, has robbed us, and the next time again we give our money to them, that’s foolishness.
That’s foolishness. They have robbed us and we can’t trust them at that time. And if somebody has a tendency to do that repeatedly, then we just have to end the relationship.
So, even then, we can do that even if we have to take action against them. We can do that with a non-resentful attitude. So, forgiveness as an emotion means that our agenda is not to get even with them.
Our agenda, our purpose is more to protect others from them. And eventually actually protect them also from themselves. Whatever actions they are going to do, they are going to get the karmic reactions for that in the future.
So, they have hurt us and we don’t want them to go and hurt others also. So, we may take actions against them. So, Krishna tells Arjuna to fight in the Kurukshetra war.
In the 11th chapter, 33rd verse, he says, Krishna says, I have become the instrument, you fight and kill your enemies. I will ensure that you win. And in the same chapter, 22 verses later in 11.55, Krishna says, Krishna says, Don’t have any animosity towards anyone.
So, Krishna is telling Arjuna, fight. But he is telling Arjuna, don’t have animosity. Don’t fight to take revenge against the Pandavas.
Sorry, against the Kauravas. Fight to establish Dharma. The two are very different motives.
Throughout the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna is telling Arjuna to fight. But Krishna doesn’t even once talk about any of the atrocities that the Kauravas had performed. His motive is not that Arjuna should fight to get even, to take revenge.
His motive is that you are a Kshatriya, your duty is to establish Dharma. And fight to establish Dharma. So, we may also sometimes take strong action against someone.
But that is not out of agenda to get even or get back. It is to establish Dharma, to protect that person from hurting others as they have hurt us. And to protect them from themselves also.
So, with that motive, if we are acting, then the action may not seem forgiving, but in intention we are forgiving. Does it answer your question? So, this perpetually forgiving is setting ourselves up for hurt. So, we have to intelligently choose whether to forgive and forget, or whether to forgive but withhold trust, or forgive and take corrective action.
When we hear about mind, we think how our mind is not proper. And we also hear the process which can fix it. But something makes us complacent to address the issues.
We think that, I am going for it, but I can address this later. So, the complacency can even lead to perpetual postponing of application of the process. We know the solution, we know the problem, but we just don’t apply the solution to the problem.
And we just keep postponing, postponing, and perpetually postponing. It can be something small that one is going through in their life, or it can be something big also. So, we know the problem, we know the solution, but what prevents us to apply the solution? And how can one overcome? Sometimes we know that we have some problem.
We also know that the process of bhakti is the solution to that problem. But we are complacent and we keep postponing applying that solution. So, what makes us complacent and how can we overcome that? Firstly, it is not necessarily always complacency.
It may just be a sense of priority. All of us have many things which we have to improve. And some things may require a very urgent attention.
And some things, they can be worked out later. If I look at, say, I have these ten things which I need to work on. If I try to work on all ten of them at the same time, I’ll get completely worked up.
I’ll not be able to function. So, I have to choose. In the war terminology they say, they call it as choosing your battles.
So, now say, if India has some issues with China, China has some issues with India, Pakistan has some issues with India. Some other terrorists are there. So, whatever, we have limited forces.
I’ll fight this battle, this battle I’ll fight later. If at all I have to fight it. So, sometimes we may just decide that this anartha is going to take some time to deal with.
So, then we may just put it on the back burner and work on some other things. Because even fighting with our weaknesses requires some confidence that I can fight and I can win. And sometimes this samanartha is so big that when we try to fight it, we just fall again and again and again.
Then we may just decide, ok, this I’ll keep it in abeyance right now. I’ll fight other battles. I’ll work on them.
And then gradually when we fight battles that we can win, that gives us confidence. That this Krishna Bhakti really works. And not just really works, we may say, Krishna Bhakti works, but doesn’t work for me.
That’s what you think, you know. Yes, everybody can change their conditionings, but I can’t change my conditionings. Somehow the mind may think like that.
But when we see for ourselves, this works. So, then that gives us confidence and then that may help us to choose to eventually focus on some bigger battle. So, prioritization in terms of firstly what is very urgent to deal with and also what is manageable to deal with.
That is also a sign of intelligence. And when we work in that way, gradually we build from small successes towards big successes. We will win small battles to move towards winning big battles.
That may be just one way we function. Now, of course, different people have different psychologies. Some people, it’s only when they are fighting a big battle they get excited.
So, some people, they may feel, okay, I can’t fast in Rijal or Ekadashi. So, you know, I will avoid, I’ll take just one meal and then I’ll take other times some fruits or something like that. So, that way we do and then gradually we raise our standard.
I’ll just give fasting as an example. And then gradually they raise the standard. Some other people feel, unless they are fasting, you know, what is this? When they get Rijal, Ekadashi, you know, they feel excited, you know, abhi kuch karna hai.
Now I’ll be able to achieve something. So, although it’s difficult, but that sense of challenge stimulates them. So, different people respond differently to different levels of difficulties.
So, for some people, small difficulties is what spur them on. And they get over small difficulties and then they can face gradually big difficulties. For some people, small difficulties are so small, what is the use of dealing with this? Chhod do isko.
Even if I fast and take just one meal, what is so special about it? Better than let me just take three meals full. Doesn’t matter. So, sometimes the sense of challenge comes when we really try something difficult.
So, we have to look at our own psychology. And we should always be on the path of self-improvement. But which aspect of the self we focus on for improving, that is something which can be left to individual discretion.
It’s not that we are rejecting or we are denying that we have that problem. It’s just that that’s not what we are in a position to deal with right now. Having said that, sometimes we may feel that some problem is not really so urgent, but it may actually be urgent.
So, I may be very short-tempered and I feel, you know, I’ll deal with this in future. But you know, we say I’ll deal with this in future, but in present people are not able to deal with us. Because we create so much trouble.
Then we may also need some association of some other devotees, some other spiritual guides who tell us this is really important, you have to work on this. And so, what we prioritize on and what we postpone for later daily, this is something which you have to intelligently decide. And it may be good to consult others.
There are equals or seniors, whoever, about what we should work on. And see, normally we look at the world through our mind. So, if somebody comes and starts speaking very sweetly with me, immediately my mind says, kya chahiye isko? What does this person want? Why is he speaking so sweetly with me? That’s just the way we think.
So, we look at everyone through the filter of our mind. But if we have even one devotee whom we trust enough, that instead of looking at them through the mind, we look at the mind through them. That means, okay, my mind is saying it’s like this.
This devotee is saying it’s like this. Then, okay, who is right? So, we need some devotee who is that close to us. We don’t necessarily uncritically accept their opinion.
But we don’t just summarily reject it also. We objectively evaluate it. And based on that, we can decide.
So, we need spiritual guides who understand our mind. And who help us to understand our mind. Somebody who is simply only a person who studies Shastra.
And somebody else is a person who is actually down in the field preaching. Their mind may be very different. They just don’t understand each other.
So, we need somebody who can understand what we are saying. And then they guide us. So, that guidance can also help us to prioritize what we deal with.
And most important is some inspiring association. If we have some Anartha which we wish to work on, then we have to find someone who is remarkably free from that Anartha. And that example will inspire us.
So, for example, say, if I get angry very quickly, then I know 2-3 devotees, I have seen them, you know, in the situation where literally like smoke is coming from my head. And they are so calm. And it’s not that they are apathetic.
But they are dealing with the issue. So, I feel if I could be so calm like this, it’s so nice. So, we need to have some devotees who inspire us.
So, when we have that, that becomes the strongest trigger for change. So, by prioritizing what we need to change, by consulting with others to decide what to prioritize, and by seeking inspiring examples for changing what we need to change, we can actually apply the solution of Bhakti to the problem of the weakness and change ourselves. Thank you.
Should we stop here? So, thank you very much. Shri Prabhupada Ki Jai Gaur Bhakta Vrindaki Jai Uday Gaur Premad Dey Shri Kattalacharya Prabhu Ki Jai Prabhupada Ki Jai