What is the difference between remorse and atonement?
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How do we repent? There is remorse and there is repent.
So actually let me put the Sanskrit words first, because in English the sense is not so clear. There is paschata and there is prayaschitta. Prayaschitta is the external activities that we do for atonement.
Prayaschitta is the inner feeling that I did wrong. So prayaschitta is the inner awareness that I did something wrong, and the paschata is the inner awareness that I did something wrong, and prayaschitta is the external thing that I do to counter it. So now in the process of Bhakti, especially in the Srimad Bhagavatam, the sixth canto it is described, that the best atonement is Bhakti itself.
That means if we do something wrong, the solution to it is, rather than we can do some fasting, we can do some austerity, that’s all good, but the most important thing is that desire will get cleansed by the practice of Bhakti itself. So if we find that we have done something wrong, then the best thing to do is to increase our commitment to the practice of Bhakti. That means I may decide that now, okay, I did something wrong, I may chant some extra rounds, or I may read some Bhagavatam more, I may do some deity worship more, I may sing some kirtans more.
So this we can be flexible, we don’t have to necessarily do something which is the most difficult for us to do. We can even do something which is most joyful for us. So if I find that I like to sing bhajans, then I like to sing bhajans but I somehow put it aside.
Then I decide I’ve done something wrong, so everyday I’ll spend 15 minutes, I’ll sing some bhajans, very prayerful bhajans to try to purify my heart. Or I’ll maybe read Bhagavatam, some verses everyday. So basically the best way to atone is to connect ourselves with Krishna more, is to commit ourselves to connecting with Krishna.
And sometimes some kind of self-punishment may help, but that really doesn’t change much. What really changes is purification of the heart happens through the increased connection with Krishna. So repentance is more like the feeling, the atonement is the external action that we do.
So now how do we, if the question is how do we repent, means how do we get the feeling? If we are not feeling only that I did something wrong, then we have to actually associate with devotees who are striving to live purely. And then when we see how purely they are living and then we see how we are living, this is not the way I should be living. We hear shastra and then we understand this is a pure standard and then we at least become aware that what I am doing is not the right thing.
So repentance comes by associating with pure hearted devotees. And atonement is best done by committing ourselves to the practice of bhakti more diligently.