What is the process by which the false ego gets hurt?

Anwser Podcast

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
ego gets hurt say when people neglect us or disrespect us or attack us answer actually it is not the false ego that gets hurt it is primarily the soul that pursues hurt because of misidentification now we have to understand that the fall when you talk about the ego krishna uses the word ahankar in two senses one is as a thing and another as a concept he says ahankar is one of the eight elements of maternal energy so this is 7.4 in the gita this is just like earth is a thing water is a thing so like that ahankar is also a thing at the same time krishna also uses the word ahankar in the sense of a conception in 3.27 he says that because of ego the person thinks that i am the doer when actually maternal nature is doing things so now here because of ego means here’s a ego is a conception like some people who are very proud very arrogant you say they have a lot of ego so in us if you consider ego as a thing that is something which all of us have and we need to have ego is the is the is the thing that brings about the link between the body and the soul hmm so ego as a thing just like and the the brain is a tool which you need for thinking the hand is a tool which i need for holding like that the ego is a tool that we need for the soul to link with the body the whole subtle body but out of the part out of that ego is one part of the subtle body so the ego as a thing will always exist but ego is a concept when we say that is to think that i am great to think i am powerful i am the controller i am the enjoyer who is there like me that conception is it characterizes the ungodly and krishna says that is ahankar so now when when somebody disrespects us somebody insults us or whatever at that time what exactly happens basically let’s start with physical hurt and then we’ll come to other subtler forms of hurt so a physical hurt somebody beats us slaps us so you say somebody attacks us and we get a fracture in principle our getting a fracture is not much different from say our car getting a puncture the body is like a vehicle for the soul just like the car is a vehicle for us and when the car gets punctured we are troubled by it because we can’t go where we want to do but from our perspective a car getting punctured is different from our own body getting fractured from our perspective okay the car is out there the car doesn’t work then i have if the car is punctured i have two options one is i try to fix the car or i try to get another car maybe get somebody else’s car or just hire a vehicle or find some other alternative way to move so we don’t we don’t identify with the car interesting extent of course it’s a brand new car and we are very proud of the car again ego if that car is a part of our fabric of ego then even a small damage to the car it hurts us a lot suppose i had a car and i was very proud of it now i sold the car i got a handsome amount for the car and tomorrow when i see the car going on the road and somehow somebody goes and hits the car i won’t feel so disturbed because why i am not emotionally invested in anymore i have disinvested myself from it so for a pure devotee also when the body gets injured when the leg gets fractured that’s trouble because the pure devotee may also have plans and i would do this for krishna this service needs to be done this project needs to be done and the fracture interferes but for a pure devotee a fracture to the body is like a puncture of a car the seat is an important vehicle which has been damaged for us if you don’t see the vehicle damage you feel as if i have been hurt so for us a fracture is a distress for a pure devotee a fracture is a inconvenience from the perspective of external actions we may rush to a doctor and a pure devotee may also rush to a doctor when there is fracture um but the internal consciousness is different we feel as if i have been injured but they understand okay this tool has been damaged so the essential process by which we feel pain when the body undergoes some sort of problematic stimuli that is misidentification krishna says in 13.21 in the gita he says that that action and reaction in this material world they are done under the supervision of material nature but pleasure and pain they are experienced because of the soul’s desire to enjoy because the souls investing one’s consciousness in something so if my consciousness is no longer invested in the car then i won’t feel pleasure or pain but if i consciously invested then i’ll surely feel pleasure and pain so now means the misidentification which is caused by the our investment of emotions even our investment of identity we could say we identify ourselves with it that is what causes distress that is what causes pain so when we start practicing bhakti we start identifying more as souls as parts of krishna and as parts of krishna when we strive to serve him then gradually we start experiencing our connection with krishna and thereby we start feeling more and more a real we start gaining more and more a realization of our spiritual identity okay i’m a soul i’m part of krishna then we don’t feel that threatened and whatever happens at the material level to the body so it is said that serious serious spiritualists are concerned but not disturbed it’s like when a pure dude has a fracture they’re concerned okay this leg has got damaged but they’re not disturbed you don’t feel personally threatened by it now this is with respect to physical injury now with respect to when somebody hurts us at the level of the ego normally the word ego has a strong negative connotation and all hurts in relationships we could say at one level there and because of the ego um i am we can say that they are all meant to help us develop humility ultimately to attain love for krishna you have to develop and we strive sometimes and we may not strive ourselves circumstances force us to strive in that direction now if i consider on the other side that this is this is the devotional perspective but also another perspective is that in normal human relationships we do expect certain amount of respect certain amount of reciprocation and if we don’t get it our relationship with krishna has to always go on but our relationship with others the extent to which we may invest ourselves in it will will and should depend on how they’re reciprocating actually prabhupada was speaking in india he was going here going there giving talks and nobody was getting committed prabhupada could have said that oh krishna is arranging all this for my purification let me continue speaking here i get i’ll develop my humility i’ll develop i’ll get purified because ultimately bhaktislaan sahib thakur said that even if you speak nobody comes speak to the walls and the balls will hear and you will get purified the proba could have adopted that same spirit the proper did did have that same spirit that whether it was one person or 10 people or 100 people probably speak enthusiastically about krishna to everyone at the same time prabhupada’s focus was not on humility or humiliation his focus was on service to krishna i have a mission given by my spiritual master that is to share krishna’s message with others so i have to follow that i have to pursue that purpose no matter what happens and so just by being here in india where people are not taking things seriously i have limited time i’m old now and people my time is getting wasted therefore let me go to america let me try to preach in america the important point is that in the name of humility brahupada did not just passively accept whatever was happening brahupada assertively tried to get more people to come try to encourage more people to take up krishna or take a bhakti yoga so he did definitely work in a way which was conducive for the in service to krishna similarly when we are thinking about the whole process by okay how do i get hurt how is my false ego hurt you know we definitely need to be aware of a false ego but we don’t have to basically think that every adversity that is happening for us that is that is good for my false ego yes it is good for my false ego but i also have to think what is good for my service so if in some relationship we just don’t get any reciprocation if in some service we just don’t get any respect if you’re going to a program week after week but people don’t people in the people don’t pay any attention seriously people are just looking here looking there not really attending the class then you may decide there’s no point in going here i’ll go somewhere else and that is perfectly fine that is not because of ego it is so that we can have our own need for space and with that need for space we can move on so usually to summarize and answer your question that our whenever we feel hurt it is because of misidentification which is caused by the ego and that is ego as a conception but ego as an object is always going to exist because it is one of the eight elements which brings about a connection between this soul the physical body now if we are simply driven by ego then even if we practice bhakti our bhakti practice will be determined by whether we get respect or not if we don’t get we will think what am i practicing but when we have humility that means our goal is not simply that oh i want i should develop humility or we have proper understanding of humility our goal is that i want to serve krishna and humility is a very empowering tool for me to serve krishna but at the same time it is service that is important so i write these articles on the daily which is humility means to not let our ego come in the way of our purpose humility means to not let our ego come in the way of our purpose so we know we all have a purpose to serve krishna in a particular way and if you find that the new constitutions are coming in the way of our purpose our purpose is to attract more and more people to krishna’s message there will be criticism when we are serving krishna but if our purpose is clear then we will not be governed or primarily by encouragement or discouragement criticism or praise affirmation or denunciation we’ll be governed by what is our purpose and how we can best serve that purpose so as devotees we are meant to be humble but that doesn’t mean that we are to deliberately undergo humiliation if sometimes we find that some person is too disrespectful too neglectful then we might just say no point in spending time with this person let me work with someone else and let me try to move ahead in my service to krishna so by keeping ourselves centered on service to krishna we will be able to cultivate the necessary mode of humility in such a way that we don’t become a doormat for others others can’t trample us at the same time we also don’t get obsessed with others why do you do that why do that okay that happened but and i felt hurt by it but my service is more important and i’ll go on with my service so if i can do my service in that existing system existing setup that’s fine otherwise i do something else like prabhupada was trying to preach to gauriyam when it didn’t work propa went to america and established iskcon himself for us the challenges are not that big and also solution will not be so drastic but it is perfectly valid if in a particular relationship you’re not getting reciprocation or we are feeling disrespect or neglected then we can always find some other place where we can serve krishna and we shouldn’t think that that is simply ego there is a basic need for affirmation for reciprocation we are personal creatures and personal creatures means is the interpersonal give and take which has to be there so expecting that is not ego so that ego as i said as an object is essential for our connection with krishna for our connection with the body and then through that connection with the body we function in this world and that connection in the with the body for what purpose is it am i going to use it for my sense gratification or am i going to use it for krishna’s service it is what will differentiate us between characterizers as well as a humble person or as a arrogant person