From Fear to Surrender
From Fear to Surrender 1 – Understanding how our fears originate
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?ref=embed_video&v=2132385616990381
From Fear to Surrender 2 – FEAR acronym for analyzing fear part 1 – Faith and Education
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?ref=embed_video&v=2133225353573074
From Fear to Surrender 3 – FEAR acronym for analyzing fear 2 – Attachment and Redirection
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?ref=embed_video&v=2133358276893115
From Fear to Surrender 4 – FEAR acronym – 4 steps for overcoming fear
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Shri Sridhar Swami Prabhuji Ki Jai. Hare Krishna. Hare Krishna.
Am I audible behind? Yes. So, I am grateful to be here amongst all of you today. And, I will speak on the topic of facing our fears.
And, I will be using two acronyms, fear, to explain first analytically how fear originates. Four aspects of fear. And then, for dealing with fear, I will use another acronym.
Today will be the introductory class, which will set some background. So, tomorrow when we talk about analysing fear, I will talk about how F.E.A.R. Fear arises or is related with our faith, our education, our attachments, and our redirection. Or rather, how we can deal with faith through redirection.
That will be the part of analytical. And then, when I am telling you how to overcome fear, I will talk about another acronym fear, F.E.A.R. Focus, Engage, Arise, and Realise. In the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna talks about fear at various places.
The first reference to the fear comes in the first chapter itself, where Arjuna says that, I am fearful that sinful reactions will come upon me. That such sinful reactions are so terrible, I do not want them. In the second chapter, again there is fear which comes up, where Krishna tells Arjuna that those who run away from the battlefield because of fear, A. People will make fun of you saying that you have run away out of fear.
And these two references itself can indicate two aspects of fear. So, I was just, last year I was in Columbus, Ohio and I was giving a similar talk on focus on your core intention, not on your circumstantial emotions. There I talk about how fear is an emotion which arises from various directions.
So, one Chinese girl was there after the programme and she asked this question, So, what can I do practically to overcome all my fears? I said, we can never overcome all our fears. It's just not possible. And all fears are not meant to be overcome.
Why? Because fear is an essential protector from danger. Suppose we are in a hundred story building and we look down from the balcony, we see the dizzying drop and we feel it is a fear. And that fear protects us from the danger.
No, I should not peer down like this. I have to be careful. So, just as pain is undesirable, but pain is a physical protector also.
If I am sitting on this chair, this asana, and suppose there is a nail or a thorn over here. When I feel the pain, then that pain, I should not sit here, I should shift a little bit. So, pain is definitely not palatable.
But still it is essential because it protects. Similarly, fear is not a palatable emotion at all. But fear is also essential because it protects us from danger.
So, if fear is not there, we will foolishly rush into dangerous situations. If a child is looking down from a hundred story building and a child feels no fear, then the mother will become filled with fear. Hey, what are you doing? Come back.
Come back. Stop. So, there is healthy fear, which is a protector.
The body is designed to function within particular limits. We can't take situations that are too hot or too cold. We can't tolerate too much hunger or too much thirst.
So, here these are body needs. And when those body needs of a particular temperature, of a particular level of nutrition, when these are not provided for, at that time fear warns us that I should not be doing like this. Now, when I am actually hungry, at that time it's not just fear, it's the dissatisfaction, the pain of hunger is there.
But even before that comes, if the prospect of hunger comes, that fear comes before that. Oh, I don't want ever to be hungry. I don't want to be too thirsty.
So, let me take some water with me. So, fear acts as a protector. In that sense, fear is not meant to be overcome per se.
But there is a difference between fear and fearfulness. Fearfulness, as the words indicates, means we are full of fear. Normally, if there is danger and then as a warning about the danger I feel fear, that fear is positive.
But if there is no danger and still I feel fear, that is being fearful. And that is undesirable. Say, I have come back to my home, I was at a 100 storey building and I looked down and I felt fear and a dizzying drop.
And now I have come back at my home sitting comfortably on my bed and I start rippling. Oh, that terrible drop was there. What if I fall down from that drop? So, when there is no danger but there is fear, that is being fearful.
And fearfulness is undesirable. So, fearfulness is something which we need to deal with. Krishna talks about this in the 18th chapter of the Bhagavad Gita, when he talks about determination in the mode of ignorance.
This is in 18.35, that यया स्वप्नं भयं शोकं विशादं मदमेवच नविमुञ्चति दुर्मेधा दृति सापार्थ तामसी यया स्वप्नं, when one is imagining, Oh, this will work out so wonderfully, that will work out so wonderfully. Or, भयं, when one is just paranoid, fantasising in a negative way, Oh, this may go wrong, that may go wrong. What if this happens? What if that happens? So, स्वप्नं and भयं, both of these signify ignorance.
In fact, Krishna says this signifies not just ignorance, it signifies determination in the mode of ignorance. That means we hold on to something, even when it hurts us. Determination is normally considered positive.
Say, if somebody is falling off a cliff, and they are holding on to a rope. Now, it may be painful, but they still hold on to that rope tightly, because that is the way they are going to save their life. So, that is determination.
But suppose, I am sitting comfortably, but then I hold on to a rope that is very sharp and pointed, almost like thorny, and my hand is bleeding. People tell me, let it go, but still I hold on to it. Now, that is painful.
That is foolish. So, determination means holding on to something, even if it doesn't feel good, because it's for good. But the opposite of determination is obstinacy.
Obstinacy means we hold on to something, even when it is bad. So, when we become fearful, at that time, it is not at all a pleasant situation to be in. But still, somehow, our mind holds on to that.
Oh, what if this happens? What if that happens? What if that happens? And in that way, we are holding on to thought patterns, which are hurting us. That's why Krishna says, determination in the mode of ignorance. Now, in psychology, there are two terms.
There is illusion and there is hallucination. Now, illusion means that there is some object, but it is perceived wrongly. So, for example, there is a rope.
Oh, there is a snake in my room. There is a stimulus, but the stimulus is perceived wrongly. That is illusion.
Hallucination means there is no stimulus only. I wake up and I feel somebody is there in my room. I turn on the light.
There is nobody here. There is nobody. What is it? Why are you so afraid? So, this is hallucination.
Now, fear can arise because of various reasons. One is, as I said, fear is an indicator of danger. And that fear is healthy.
But even in the absence of danger, when fear comes up, that fear is unhealthy. Say, for example, if a student has an exam. Now, for the exam, the student needs to prepare.
And with our preparation, the student prepares nicely and then gives the exam, does well in the exam, that's good. And if there is some fear, what if I don't do well? It's bad. And that fear can prompt the student to study well.
Part of that fear becomes the dominant emotion. Oh, if I don't study well or if I don't get good marks in my exam, then I will fail. And what will people say? I will not get a job.
And what will happen to my life? And one goes into a whole negative fantasy. There is utopia and there is dystopia. Utopia is, imagine an idyllic world.
Everything is wonderful. And dystopia means, everything is dreadful. So, when we are fearful, then we go into dystopia.
And in this dystopia, the mind becomes so paranoid. Constantly fearing this will go wrong, that will go wrong, that will go wrong. And thus, we end up paralysed.
So, at one level, fear is an indicator of danger. But at another level, fear itself becomes a danger. Because that fear cripples me from normal functioning.
It prevents me from doing anything. So, if I am driving on a road and if I have a healthy fear, that I should not go beyond the speed limit, then that is good. But if I see some accident somewhere happening and then I see that and I start thinking, what if accident happens to me also? And that makes me so fearful that I decide I won't drive on the road only.
Then how will I function? So, fear can be an indicator of danger when it is healthy. But when fear itself becomes a danger, fear paralyses us, fear prevents us from acting properly, then that fear becomes bad. So, now, if we consider the emergence of fear from a more, this is from a practical perspective, from a philosophical perspective.
Actually, all of us are souls who are parts of Krishna. Krishna is a supreme controller and as his parts, we are also tiny controllers. When we function in the world, we need to control things.
So, if somebody is driving a plane, then they have to control all the parameters for the driving of the plane carefully so that there is safe landing, safe flying, safe take-off. So, for any responsibility in the world, we need to be able to control. So, we have a need to control.
At the same time, we also have a limited capacity to control. A pilot can control the plane, may be expert and well-trained, by which the pilot tries to control the plane. But if the plane itself malfunctions, if the atmosphere becomes very stormy and turbulent, if some terrorists hijack the plane, there are so many possibilities which can cause the plane to not reach its destination safely.
And for many of these possibilities, the pilot can't do much. So, in that sense, we have a need to control and we have a limited capacity to control. And this is the cause of our fear.
Because we need to control certain things, but we can't control them. And thus, the very nature of material existence is filled with fear. Now, all living beings are subjected to fear.
The Mahabharata and the Hitopadesha, both of them talk about the four activities which are common to all living beings. Which are those four activities? Eating, sleeping, mating, defending. So now, aahara, nidra, bhaya, maithu, namacha, saamanya, neta, pashya, bhirna, rana.
So, among these four activities, if you see, the common denominator is fear. Defending is basically a reaction to fear. In English, Prabhupada translated it as defending.
The Sanskrit is aahara, nidra, bhaya, maithu, namacha. So, bhaya is fear. A response to fear is defensiveness.
So, actually, we, all, eating, sleeping, mating, these are essential biological functions. We need food to eat, we need a place to stay, sleep. So now, all these things, if you look at the natural world, where animals live, all these are under great threat.
So, we make arrangements to have food for ourselves. But, what if that food is stolen by someone? We live in a more sophisticated society today, so we make financial arrangements, we have investments, we have security, we have insurance. But all these are basically means to deal with fear.
So, fear that our arrangements for eating, sleeping, mating, these may be lost. So, fearing is the common denominator of material existence. But in today's world, fear has become much, much more.
There are a lot of people suffering from a lot of mental problems. Mental health issues are unparalleled. Now, why is it that there are so much mental health problems in the world? We could analyse it from a sociological perspective.
Ecologically, we human beings have been able to gain much more control than what we had in the past. At a simple level, we can just press a few buttons and talk with anyone in any part of the world. Just by pressing a few buttons, we can summon information from any part of the world.
Just by pressing a few buttons, we can move far faster than the fastest animal, fastest bird. We can fly in planes, we can drive in cars. So, in many ways, technology has enhanced our capacity to control external things.
However, technology doesn't just change the way we live. Technology also changes the way we think. Changes the way we think means that because we have greater capacity to control, so technology creates the thought process within us that we are the controllers.
That we are the controllers or we can be the controllers. And the greater the belief, the notion that we are the controllers, the greater is the insecurity when we are unable to control. So, at a psychological level, the anxieties that we face in the world are because we have a greater notion that we can control.
Every relationship begins with the promise that we will be the controller. And every relationship gives us the realisation we are not the controllers. So, that's how life actually moves forwards.
We try to control various things but not many things are in our control. But the more the illusion that we can control, the greater the agitation when we can't control. And at a certain level in today's world, the notion is there that we are the makers of our destiny.
Now, of course, we do make our destiny. But we alone don't determine the results. So, at one level it appears as if you are the maker of your destiny.
You work hard, you use your brains, you will become successful. This seems to be a very empowering idea. At the same time, this can also be a very burdening idea.
Because if I alone am the determiner of my success, that means I alone am the determiner of my failure also. But the simple fact is that in every situation in life, things beyond our control determine results. A student may prepare very wonderfully for the exams.
But what if the student falls sick before the exam? A team may prepare for the cricket world cup very well. But what if before their most important match, their key player gets injured? Or the match which they have to win, their reign in the match gets washed off? In life, there are many things which are not in our control. So, to the extent we think that we alone determine the results, to that extent we suffer fear and distress when we can't control.
This is not just at a level of sports or studies, but this is much more at the level of the mind. When the mind becomes disturbed, thinking that this can go wrong, that can go wrong, that can go wrong. At one level, it is our responsibility to try to get things right.
But at another level, it's also our responsibility to recognise that certain things are not in my control. Krishna has six opulences. Does anyone know which are the six opulences? Power, Beauty, Wealth, Strength, Knowledge, Renunciation.
Now, among these six opulences, if we consider, people are attracted by wealth. Everybody looks who is so wealthy, how wealthy, wealth, beauty, strength, knowledge, fame. These attract everyone.
But how many people are attracted to renunciation? When you say renunciation is an opulence, renunciation, not really many people are attracted. Comparatively speaking, isn't it? But then why is renunciation considered an opulence? Actually, people may not be attracted to renunciation, but people are attracted to the fruit of renunciation. And that is peace.
Tyagaj shanti ranantaram. So, everybody likes somebody who is very peaceful, very calm, very composed. How do you stay so cool? The previous captain of India was called Captain Cool.
How do you stay so cool in such situations? So, everybody admires that. So, we may not be attracted to renunciation per se, but the result of renunciation in terms of composure, calmness, that is what people are attracted to. So, the calmness is the opposite of fearfulness.
So, Krishna has this opulence of renunciation, that means he is not agitated, he is not fearful. And for us also, fear arises because of the notion that we are the controllers. So, intelligence means to recognise that there are certain things in my control which I need to do to the best of my capacity.
But also to recognise that certain things are not in my control. And just let go of them. But this idea of letting go is something which most people just don't accept.
Why should I let go? I want to hold on to things. I want to be the controller. So, when we try to control, then it is not possible for us to control.
That is when we become extremely fearful. I was just in America a few months ago, and there, at that time, for almost a month, in California, a huge fire was raging. For weeks and weeks and weeks, they were using extensive fire tankers and everything, the technology that they had, but still those fires were not getting extinguished at all.
So, similar fires keep breaking out periodically, especially in the thick forests over there. So, in Texas, about 25 years ago, when a forest had broken out, there are these firefighters who go with all their equipment. And when they are going with their equipment, they are going there to extinguish the fire.
But they have their coordinator, a boss in a helicopter, who has the big picture. And he tells, the fire is becoming too much, now you get out of here. And they are told, when you get out, just drop everything and run.
They have their fire extinguisher cans, they have their tubes, hoses. They have, just drop everything and run. So, in Texas, what happened, there were about 10 of these who were deep inside the fire, firefighters.
And they got the command, just drop everything and run. And 5 of them, they just followed that. Remaining 5 said, we will just, in case there is a lot of fire, we will keep our extinguishers with us.
And those extinguishers were not very big. But those extinguishers, their weight slowed them down. And all these 5 firefighters burned to death.
And eventually when the fire came out, fire was extinguished and they located their bodies, charred bodies. They found that they were just around 10 metres away from where the fire was extinguished. And if they had dropped the extinguishers, they would have got there.
They would have reached to safety. So here, now when they are acting as firefighters, they have to go into the fire and then they need to control. Control the equipment they have, control where the fire is going by putting the extinguisher properly.
But in certain situations, things when they go out of control, the thing which we have to do is accept. Now I can't control, let me move out. So if we move out at that time, then we can save ourselves from a lot of trouble.
So we are talking about fear here. There are things which will go out of control. And at that time, we also need the inner strength to accept that things are not in my control.
So let me move out. If we don't do that, then that is when our fear increases more and more. Now if I am in a car and the car is going out of control.
Now I try to control the car as much as possible. But the brakes have failed and the car is rushing by and I know there is a cliff from which it is going to fall off. Now if till the last moment I keep trying to control the car, keep trying to control the car, all that will happen is the car will go up the cliff and I will die.
In fact, at a particular moment I said, I can't control now. Just open the door and just leap out of the car. So much of our fear, these are physical situations where we can easily understand.
You know, you can't control, just abandon it now. But the same principle applies at the level of the mind. At the level of the mind, we try to hold on to it.
This should work out like this. This person should behave like this. This should happen like this.
And the more we get obsessed, this is how things should happen. And when they are not happening that way, we get more and more agitated, more and more agitated, more and more agitated. Now we have fans over here.
Now fan moves, it makes the air around it cool. When our mind moves round and round and round and round, it makes us hot. It doesn't make us cool.
It heats us up. This should happen. Why is this not happening? Why is that not happening? Why is that not happening? Why? Why? Why? In this way we just get more and more agitated.
So, when we philosophically understand that we are not meant to be the supreme controllers. We are controllers, but we are tiny controllers. And we are meant to use our controlling capacity in the service of the supreme controller.
So, as Krishna's servants, sometimes we control. Sometimes we exercise control. And as Krishna's servants, sometimes we have to release control.
In both cases, we are servants of Krishna. And if we have this understanding, then we will not get so overwhelmed by fear. I earlier said about how there is hallucination and there is illusion.
Hallucination means there is no object at all, but still we perceive something. And illusion means there is some object, but it is perceived wrongly. The mind makes us fearful in both ways.
Once a woman came to a doctor and she said, Doctor, doctor, there is a frog in my belly. Doctor said, no, there cannot be any frog in your belly. She said, no, no, doctor, the frog is there.
When the doctor did not believe, she went to another doctor. She said, there is a frog in my belly and I have to remove it. He said, no, no, there is no frog in your belly.
Second doctor, third doctor, she went to the tenth doctor. And the tenth doctor, when he heard the story that he has gone to nine doctors, he said, the frog is there in my belly. He said, okay, let me do some testing.
He did some tests and he decided to play along with her. He said, yes, you know, we discovered actually there is a frog in your belly. Oh, thank you, doctor.
Nobody was believing me. At last you have believed me. Thank you.
So, he says, we need to remove it. When can we remove it? Right away. Please remove it right away.
He said, okay. Then he gave her local anaesthesia. He gave her some anaesthesia and did some small surgical incisions in her belly and then asked a nurse to go to a nearby pond and get a frog from there.
When she came back to consciousness, he said, we found this frog. Oh, thank you, doctor. You saved my life.
You saved my life. Thank you very much. She was so happy and she went away.
And the whole medical staff thought it was a very clever solution. She is also happy and the problem is solved. But one week later, she came back frantic.
She said, doctor, doctor, the frog had babies. The frog had babies. See, what happened? The mind, when it imagines problems, this changing the reality at the physical level does not solve the problem.
Why? Because the mind has become habituated to fearing. So, when there is external danger, we deal with the danger, the fear goes away. But when the mind becomes habituated to fearing, then even when the danger, originally the danger was not there only, but even if that perception, imaginary perception of the danger is removed, still that fear remains.
So here, the point is that the way we think, the way we act, that gets imprinted on our consciousness. It forms impressions. And that is the way we tend to think.
So, if somebody is very nervous, somebody is very fearful, somebody is very worried, you tell them, don't worry, cool down. For some people it may work, for some people it may just not work. Why? For some people, cool down, calm down.
For them, that fearfulness has not become a habit of the mind. Tell them, okay, check it, don't be so fearful, calm down, they'll calm down. But for others, if fearfulness has become a habit of the mind, then even if the perception is not there, the fear will be there.
So that's why the solution to fearfulness is not simply in telling people, why are you so afraid? Somebody who is fearful, if you tell them, you are a coward, that's not going to help. Because at that time, the mind has started working in a particular way. And it requires a more substantial solution.
Bhagavad Gita talks about three modes of material nature. And these three modes are ways in which our mind functions. So we could envision, say, if water falls over here, maybe there is a waterfall from which water is falling, and then there are three channels along which the water may flow.
So these three channels are like three modes. And our consciousness is like the flow of the water. So now when water is flowing in a particular channel, if we tell, why is the water flowing in this channel? Let it flow in this channel.
No, it has already gone in that path, and it is going to move in that path. So similarly, for us, the modes are like pathways within our mind, and that is how our thoughts flow. So if somebody is in the mode of ignorance, or somebody is in the mode of passion, then the modes affect that person accordingly.
In the mode of goodness, we can understand, some things are in my control, some things are not in my control. And we focus on that which is in our control. In the mode of passion, we think everything must be in my control.
And in the mode of ignorance, we think nothing is in my control. And in that way, we function. Some people make things happen, some people watch things happen, and some people wonder what happened.
So, those who make things happen are in goodness. They do certain things, they get certain things done. Some people watch things happen.
Those in passion, they try to do one thing, and in trying to do that one thing, they just become so passionate, running here and there, I forgot this, I have to do this, I have to do that, and this goes wrong, that goes wrong, that goes wrong. They try to do one thing, and ten things are set off by that, and they wonder what is happening. So, they watch things happen, this is happening, that is happening.
And some people just wonder what happened. They are lost in their own days, not knowing what to do. So, in the mode of goodness, in the mode of passion, in the mode of ignorance, there are different ways in which the mind works.
And for a person who is in the mode of ignorance, for them, if you tell them, just don't worry, things will be okay, it won't work so well. Because the mind is thinking in a particular way. So, for the person in the mode of ignorance, for them to overcome fear, they need to exercise some control.
Nothing is in my control, everything is going wrong. But, for those in the mode of passion, they need to release control. Don't try to control everything, let it go.
Things will be okay, you don't try to control everything, that's what is causing your fear. In the mode of goodness, they are able to perceive, okay, this is in my control, that is not in my control. As we move from goodness towards transcendence, we also understand that that which is not in my control, is not out of control.
It is in Krishna's control. And as we can perceive that, then we can function more effectively. Because we do what is in our control, and we leave the rest to Krishna.
This is the mode of bhakti. So, when we say, bhajahure mana shrinandanandana abhayacharanaravindare when we fix the mind on Krishna, we'll become fearless. How does that happen? At one level, it can happen just subconsciously.
We feel worried, we feel agitated, we come to a temple, we hear some kirtan, we take some darshan, and we start feeling peaceful. There's something special over here. Something special happens.
So, this happens at a subconscious level many times, and just by coming in the proximity of Krishna, we feel our fear going away. However, this may happen sometimes, and this may not happen sometimes. So, if we analytically understand how it happens, then we can replicate it more.
So, when it is said, fix the mind on Krishna, that will free us from fear. What that means is, we may be in the mode of ignorance, or in the mode of passion, or in the mode of goodness. But if we move towards transcendence, then we become situated in the two understandings.
First understanding is that I am meant to be a servant. Whatever situation happens, I am meant to serve Krishna. Second understanding is that Krishna is always in control.
And when these two understandings come together, they can free us from unnecessary fears. Even if this goes wrong, even if I lose my job, even if my health gets spoiled, even if this happens, even if that happens, still I am a servant of Krishna. Some way or the other, I will keep serving Krishna.
If I think I am going to serve Krishna in this way only, and if I can't do that, I will be frustrated. Then I am not identifying myself as a servant, I am identifying myself as that particular role in which I am going to serve. The more we understand that I am a servant, and there are different roles in which I can serve Krishna, that frees us from the anxiety.
And then secondly, even if things are going wrong, if we have the understanding that Krishna is the supreme controller, that brings peace. It's not that everything that happens in life is good. In life, bad things do happen.
And it's not that somehow we are meant to imagine that bad things are good. No, sometimes our health may get spoiled, we may be caught in an accident, our relationship may get disrupted. All these things are bad.
But Krishna can bring good even out of bad. That is Krishna's expertise. So, as devotees, when we see that Krishna is in control, that does not mean that we are meant to never feel fearful.
Fear will come. But when fear comes, what do we do? If we keep thinking about that more and more and more, then the fear will become more and more. But if we turn towards Krishna, I am a servant of Krishna and Krishna is my benevolent Lord, then that fear will decrease.
And that fear will become more manageable. Krishna says, if you become conscious of me, you will pass over all obstacles by my grace. So that, how does it mean, become conscious of him means, understand that I am a servant of Krishna, Krishna is my well-wisher, so let me try to serve him.
That way, whatever the fearful situation is there, the excessive agitation of the mind that comes up, that will be calmed down. And we will be able to move forward. So this was, I explained it briefly today.
So I talked about, I'll elaborate on this, in terms of how we can understand ourselves to be servants, how we can understand Krishna to be the controller who brings out good in us, brings everything, good out of everything, even the bad things. And how we can practically focus on the point, what does it mean that I am a servant? How can we cultivate that mood of service practically? All these things we'll discuss in our future sessions. But today I'll summarise what I spoke, then we can have some question answers.
I spoke about how fear is a natural, fear itself is not undesirable, fear is a protector. It warns us of danger. But when there is no danger and still the fear is there, then that becomes unhealthy.
So fearfulness arises because the mind is imagining danger even when it is not present. We human beings, we are caught in a dilemma where we need to control, but we can't control. Or we can't control as much as we may need to control.
And that causes fear. So the solution is we may try to increase our control. That's what we are trying to do through technology.
But yes, we can try to increase our control, but if that creates the illusion within us that we are the controllers, then when that illusion is challenged or shattered, it becomes unbearable for us. So the increased anxiety in today's world is because of the increased illusion of controllership. And when we are functioning in a particular way, at that time, just to tell, don't be fearful, that doesn't work.
Because the mind is habituated to functioning like that. Like this woman was told, a frog is brought out of your stomach, but still she imagines something else. So the modes are like tracks along which our consciousness is moving.
And the water moving along a particular channel cannot immediately be shifted to another channel. So a person who is habitually fearful, just by telling them, don't be fearful, it may not help. So what do we need to do then? We talked about in the mode of goodness, we understand what is in our control and what is not in our control.
And we focus on what is in our control. In the mode of passion, we think everything should be in my control. And when it is not, we become very agitated or fearful.
And in the mode of ignorance, we think nothing is in my control. We just go into self-pity and paranoia because of that. And in bhakti, we see that whatever is in my control, that I am meant to use in service to Krishna.
And whatever is not in my control, that is in Krishna's control. And he will bring good even out of the bad. So these twin truths, that I am a servant, I am always a servant of Krishna.
And whatever control I have, whatever control I don't have. It's all ultimately meant for the service of Krishna. So in some situations, I exercise control in the service of Krishna.
And in some situations, I release control in the service of Krishna. Say if you are going in a car which is going out of control, then you just have to jump out of the car. Firefighters, when they found the fire cannot be controlled, they had to release control and come out.
If they don't, they will perish. So we do both in a mode of service to Krishna. And when we mentally hold on to things which are not in our control, that's what agitates us excessively.
And by lifting our vision to Krishna, seeing that Krishna is the ultimate controller who will bring good even out of the bad, that can help us to substantially decrease our fears. So the focussing on Krishna will help us to decrease our fears, manage our fears by changing our understanding of what we are meant to do and what is happening in the world. So how we can analyse and apply this to practical situations, we will discuss in our future classes.
Thank you very much. Are there any questions or comments? Yes. So if we are dealing with someone, two people, one who thinks that I should be able to control everything, the other is saying nothing I can control.
So what to do? First thing is we have to see what is in our control. Sometimes we overestimate our capacity to influence others and that puts us in greater anxiety. So we are also finite beings and our capacity to influence others is there but it is limited.
So generally whatever mode a person is situated in, that's a result of both certain choices and certain circumstances. That means a person who is always got a sense of strength and success by controlling things. That person has a very strong need to control and a person who has always managed to say evade responsibility or evade culpability for problems by saying actually it is not in my control.
That person gets a sense of security by avoiding responsibility. I couldn't have done anything in that situation. So people are both products of their circumstances and their choices and we can't expect people to change overnight.
So generally when we say somebody is in the mode of ignorance and somebody is in the mode of passion, everybody goes to the different modes at different times. Krishna says these three modes are in competition. So we come to the mode of goodness also sometimes.
Sometimes we go into the mode of passion, sometimes into ignorance. So generally rational discussion, intelligent discussion is possible only when we are in the mode of goodness and only when others are also in the mode of goodness, relatively speaking. So somehow we could get, it's not that people can't be in the mode of goodness.
Even somebody who is in the mode of ignorance, that person also has a certain level of goodness. For example, in many countries, especially in the western world, driving under intoxication is considered a very serious crime. So it's like that here also.
So now just because driving under intoxication is bad, that doesn't mean that people are going to stop drinking. But then there are people who go for such parties where they are going to drink, then they take turns and they say, okay, on this party, you are not going to drink. And they say, all of you will drink, all of us will drink, you will not drink.
You will take a non-alcoholic drink this time. And next time you can drink, I will not drink. So they are going for an activity in ignorance, but even in which they have a certain level of intelligence.
The person who is drunk cannot drive. So people may be in ignorance, but that doesn't mean they are completely in ignorance. So even a person who is in passion, they also sometimes come to the mode of goodness.
So we have to see what can be done to get them to the mode of goodness. Maybe in some situations it can be just remind them of Krishna, remind them of their spiritual guide, remind them of certain philosophy or just wait for some time to pass. Sometimes when the emotions are too high at that time, it's very difficult to think calmly.
So just if some time passes, the emotional temperature goes down and then they come to the mode of goodness. So in the mode of goodness, we can actually bring issues. There are issues and there are emotions.
Or you could say there are situations and there are emotions. Or there are actions and there are emotions. There are issues, there are situations and there are actions.
But along with this the emotions are there. Mode of goodness thinking means to separate the emotion from the situation. It doesn't mean that the emotion is to be denied or rejected.
We have to accept, yes, I am feeling very angry, I am feeling enraged, I am feeling frustrated. Yes, I agree. But, okay, this is the emotion and this is the situation.
When we mix the two, then that is where the confusion starts, the argument starts. Because the same situation may create one emotion in me and another emotion in you. And then, why don't you understand? What is there to understand? Because both are not looking at the situation.
Both have mixed the situation with the emotion. So when we come to the mode of goodness, we can separate the emotion from the situation. And then, when you look, okay, I understand that you are feeling angry about this.
I understand you are feeling helpless about this. But let's look at what this is. So when the person is in the mode of passion and the person has overwhelming need to control.
Okay, what is it that is the situation? This is the situation. You are feeling that if you don't control, then you feel you are being irresponsible or you feel the people are being rebellious. You feel that you are being disrespected or whatever.
Those are emotions which arise from the situation. And those emotions have to be acknowledged. But also they have to be separated.
So when we do that, then we can address the situation and we can address the emotion. But when the two get mixed, then things just can't be addressed. So we have to somehow get to the level of, first of all, ourselves be at the mode of goodness and get others to the mode of goodness.
And then, when you separate the emotion and the situation, then the proper discussion is possible. And when discussion happens in this way, and usually it may seem sometimes the emotions are so hot that that sort of discussion is not possible. Sometimes some friction just has to occur.
And if we get in, we also get ground by that friction. But if you just let some time pass, just like seasons change, so like that the emotional temperature also changes. Sometimes it's hot.
Gradually it calms down. Let time pass. And then we deal with the situation.
So by, we acknowledge people's emotion. Not that, you know, why are you feeling angry? There's no need to feel angry. No, no.
I understand you're feeling angry. But let's look at the situation. So we separate the emotion and the situation.
Then it's possible to deal with the situation effectively. Does that answer your question? Thank you. Any other questions? What's that? Fear of future.
Okay. Fear of future. Is it a healthy fear or is it an unhealthy fear? It depends on what we do after the fear.
Actually, considering the future is a sign of intelligence. A child just wants to play all day. But the parents understand you have a whole life ahead for you.
You have to have a career. You have to have a bright future. And for that you have to study.
So the parents are more mature. They have more intelligence. And more intelligence in this context means a better capacity to look at the future.
So looking at the future and preparing for the future is a sign of the intelligence. Definitely. And preparing for the future also means anticipating problems that may come in the future.
Anticipating fears about the future. And taking steps to deal with them. So fear itself is not the problem.
What comes after the fear is. So if that worry about the future, fear about the future just overwhelms me. And I don't do anything in the present.
What if I lose my job? Okay. What if I lose my job? And thinking like that I become paralysed and I don't do my job now only. Then it's almost like I already lost my job.
Because I am not doing it. So, okay. What if I lose my job? Okay.
But who will lose a job? Okay. If at all there is a layoff and people are not working well, they may lose their job. So if I am working well, if I am developing my skills nicely.
Even if I lose my job, I can get some other job. Let me make sure that I am competent. I am doing things well properly.
So if that fear of the future brings us back to the present and helps us to better prepare in the present. I will talk later about the mood of servant. When we say we are meant to serve Krishna.
We are servants. What does that mean? There is a past, there is a present and there is a future. And service can be done only in the present.
So if we think too much about the past or think too much about the future, then that means we are not in the mood of a servant. So if the fear for the future brings us back to the present and helps us to focus on doing things better to prevent the future problem, then that fear is positive. But if that fear of the future becomes like a mental obsession, which we just keep worrying about this and that and that, and we don't do anything in the present, then that fear of the future is unhealthy.
So we have to buy our realistic experience in life. We have to see how much can I prepare for the future. Some people when they travel, they just want to take their whole house with them in their suitcase.
What if I need this? What if I need that? What if I need that? What if I need that? Now, packing a whole house in a suitcase appears impossible. Because it is impossible. So we have to say, many things can go wrong in the future, but there is a possibility and there is a probability.
Possibility means anything is possible. So right now it is possible that this roof may collapse and all of us may get crushed. But if this building is properly taken care of, if it was constructed properly, if the government has certified it is in good condition, I don't have to worry about that fear.
But if you are sitting in a decrepit building which the government has told nobody should stay here, then the collapse of the building is not a possibility, it is a probability. So when we are fearing about the future, we have to separate between possibility and probability. If I am driving a car, an accident happening is a possibility.
But if I am driving in a car where the brakes have already failed, then accident is not a possibility, it is a probability. If I am driving a car after, say, if somebody is driving a car after they have drunk a lot, then that is not a possibility, that is a probability. So we have to ourselves see what is the kind of fear that we are having.
And if it is just simply a possibility, then we just have to put it aside. We don't have to worry about it so much. It is a probability, then we have to see what can I do to deal with it.
So essentially we have to come back to the present and see if the fear of the future helps us to function better in the present, then that fear of the future is positive. Otherwise it is negative and we have to put it aside. Does this answer your question? Any of the mathaji's have any questions? If you want to write down and tell also, that is what I will define.
You mentioned about the controlling attitude. In the situation of authority, where there is excessive control of attitude and issues of power happens, how do you deal with that? So in situations where somebody has authority and they use, they try to control excessively and abuse of power happens. So what do you do in such situations? Everybody in life has to go through their own learning lessons.
And in some situations we have the capacity to deal with things, sometimes we don't have the capacity to deal with things. The Bhagavad Gita in the 13th chapter talks about two things. Prakriti and Kshetra.
Prakriti is general material nature. Kshetra is the specific area within material nature over which we have control. So for example, the President of America, his Kshetra right now is America.
The Prime Minister of India, his Kshetra is India. So somebody with the CEO of a particular company, their Kshetra is that company. And his Kshetra, its sphere of influence will be tiny.
An elephant's sphere of influence will be huge. So now why do different people have different Kshetra? Largely it is by their past karma. So Hitler by his past karma was meant to become a powerful person.
Now when they get that Kshetra, that sphere of influence, what they do within that sphere, that is up to their free will. Up to their free will. How they use their free will will determine what they do with that sphere of control.
They can use that sphere of control for good or for bad. So when somebody has been given a particular sphere of control, that can be in a governmental level, that can be in a commercial organisational level, that can be in a religious organisational level. So when they have been given a particular control, then it's up to them how they are going to use it.
So we do have the knowledge given, we have the philosophical and the devotional training by which people are meant to use the control they have for serving Krishna, for helping others to serve Krishna. But sometimes that may not happen. So when something like this happens, we have to see that there is something happening here between this person and Krishna.
This person is doing something wrong, then Krishna has given this person a particular Kshetra and in that Kshetra whatever they do, Krishna will take care of that. But what is my service in this situation? I am also a servant of Krishna, I also have a certain Kshetra. I have a certain sphere of influence.
So with my sphere of influence, what can I do? And we will have to, based on that understanding, choose a particular course of action. So I'll elaborate on this more, but I'll mention it briefly here. So when we are in any unpalatable situation, we basically have three options.
Tolerate, mitigate or emigrate. Say if we find a particular place very cold, what do I do? I tolerate it. I develop a thick skin or mitigate.
I make sure that I always have warm clothes. I have good heat conditioning in my house, in my car, whatever. Or can I just go to another place? So similarly, so the Pandavas did this, no, it's an elaborate answer.
I'll mention it later. But the Pandavas did all these three things. Initially when the Kauravas were performing austerities, Bhima was poisoned, they were trying to burn the life.
Yudhishthira told this is a family issue, don't make a big deal about it. Don't publicise it. Just tolerate it.
But eventually when Draupadi was dishonoured, and then even after the exile, Duryodhana showed no signs of remorse. He tried to have Krishna arrested when Krishna went to Shantinath. Then they decided that now war is inevitable.
At that time they had to take action. They mitigate. Mitigate means counter it.
And eventually when Krishna departed from the world, the Pandavas renounced, emigrated. So in different situations, based on what is the best way we can serve Krishna, we may do any of these three things. So somebody is doing something wrong, which we, now of course here I am assuming that somebody is actually misusing the power.
Sometimes could also be that it's just our perception that they are misusing the power also. But let's assume that that is there. Let me tolerate it.
Ok, this is going wrong over here. There are so many things going wrong in the world. I have to do what I need to do.
So let me tolerate this and focus on doing my service to Krishna. Sometimes you may decide no, this is too many things, this is not bearable for me. I have to prove something to counter it.
So I mitigate it. So we may take some actions for dealing with it. But all this we do in a mood of service to Krishna.
Sometimes you may decide this is just too complicated. I have better things to do in my life. I will not get involved in this.
So you may emigrate. So later when I talk about this, I will talk about how all these three options can be done in a mood of service. And all these three, that is a positive attitude.
And all these three can be done in a negative attitude. I can tolerate it full of resentment. I am tolerating because I am helpless.
That is not really tolerance. Tolerance is a choice which we make. Or I may mitigate not to correct the situation but to take revenge against the person.
And I may emigrate not because I have something better to do but because I am so frustrated with this. So you know walking away from a situation is different from running away from the situation. So if we basically understand that I am meant to serve Krishna, then how best I can serve Krishna in that situation, we can choose among these options.
And we can move forwards. Can the choice of how we respond to some problematic situation be influenced by the moods we are in? Yes, it is definitely influenced by the moods but we can't immediately change the mood we are in also. So I would say that sometimes we think of the mood of goodness, passion, ignorance as goodness is good, passion is bad and ignorance is very bad.
It's not necessarily like that. Now all three moods have to be in a summoned way. Sleep we can say is in the mood of ignorance.
But if we don't sleep, we won't be able to function. So all three moods are required to some extent. So some people are basically by nature pacifists.
Just don't want conflicts. Just be peaceful. Create peace.
There is an American president, he was just after another president who had been a warmonger. And this president just calmed everything down. So when his tenure ended, there was a New York Times editorial.
Thank you for nothing. Thank you for nothing means thank you that you did not create any trouble. Just kept things calm.
So some people are pacifists. And somebody who is in the mood of passion, out of control, he says you don't do anything at all. But no, that person is calming things down.
Now pacifism can be in the mood of goodness also. People bring calmness. It can be in the mood of ignorance also.
Personal passion may think it is in ignorance. So the point is that we all have our own nature. And some people, they just have to fight.
If there is nothing to fight, they will find something to fight. So it's good if they find a healthy cause to fight for. So rather than thinking that it's necessarily bad, rather than using the word mood, we can say we have our nature.
And based on our nature also we will be inclined to make a particular choice. But it should not be simply, when we make a particular choice, it should not be simply the path of least resistance. We have to see which is the path of the best service.
Because if I just want to avoid conflicts, that's good. But then ultimately I have to do some service to Krishna. So if for my service I have to resist, I have to take a stand, I'll have to do that.
So we will be pushed towards particular options by our moods. And it's not necessary that we always have to push back. But we have to keep our purpose of serving Krishna in the centre.
And then based on that we decide. So if you have to tolerate, say suppose we are going in a crowded car, a crowded local, say in Mumbai. And some person who is coming over there, pushes us.
How dare you push me? I'll push you back. And he pushes us back. And I push him back.
And he pushes us back. And I'm pushing him, he's pushing me and I get so caught in that, that my station comes and goes and I forgot it. I'm still caught in pushing, pushing, pushing.
That is stupid. Okay, how long are we going to be in that train? You want to push? Just move somewhere else and stand somewhere else and let him do the pushing. So we decide that.
So a life is meant for more than just pushing back people who are pushing us. But suppose that person who is pushing wants to push me out of the train itself. Then I cannot tolerate the pushing.
I have to push back and I have to make sure that I stay in the train. So similarly, tolerance basically means to keep small things small. Tolerance means to keep, okay, somebody is pushing me in the train, just move to some other place and move on.
Keep small things small. But treating big things as small is not tolerance. There are things which are big and have to be dealt with.
If somebody is pushing me out of the train itself, it's a big thing and I have to push back. So some people, by nature, may be very non-confrontational. But if their service requires them to take a stand, they have to do that.
And some people, by nature, will be very confrontational. But then they have to say, you know, if I am picking up this confrontation, is this really helping me in my service to Krishna? Or I am just picking up this fight, this fight, this fight, this fight and I am not able to do anything anywhere. Then let me just, hands off now.
Let me focus on this. So our services, our choices will be prompted by our modes. But if we have the overall attitude of service to Krishna, then we will choose something which is not simply determined by our modes, but which is according to our nature, but inherently with the purpose of our service to Krishna.
So thank you very much. Thank you.