Value Education and Spirituality 09 – Mahabharata 3 – Vidura – Be a forgiving not a forgetful friend

Transcript

This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
Welcome back to the series on value education and spirituality. We are discussing characters from the Mahabharata. And now we will discuss about Vidura.
And a theme we will discuss based on Vidura is be a forgiving but not a forgetful friend. So forgetful here refers not to forgetful in the sense of being irresponsible, but forgetful in the sense of being negligent about the wrongdoings of a friend. Be a forgiving but not a forgetful friend.
The relationship between Vidura and Vitrashtra is symptomatic of the difficulty in reforming someone and the tenacity of a friend in continuing those efforts. All of us have a gateway, a doorway to our heart. And inside our heart are our values, the foundation by which our decisions are made.
So our values are what determine what we will do. Now we may have not deliberated our values, but it is our values that determine our decisions. The student may be studying for an exam, but suddenly the student hears that some beauty patient is being organised and the most beautiful women are right now in the college in the auditorium.
The student will just drop the studies and rush to the auditorium in a big crowd, in a mellier, in a stampede. Why? Because that particular act of say enjoying seeing those beautiful women is at a deeper level considered to be more valuable. That may not be a conscious decision if the student would be in a more rational and calm frame of mind.
They may well think, okay, my studies are more important. My exam is there tomorrow. I can’t waste my time like this.
But the point is that whether our values are consciously deliberated or unconsciously accepted, our values base our decision, determine our decisions. So now no two people can have identical values or many people can have similar values. And generally speaking, our friendships are developed based on some sharing of values.
In a college, some students may like music and two people who are musicians may become friends because of their like-mindedness. Some others may like cricket and because of their shared interest in cricket, they may become friends. So all of us, if we consider ourselves to be circles, then we will find that there has to be some intersection between two circles for them, for some friendship to be established.
So if we cannot find much of an intersection, then even if we are physically placed together, then the relationship doesn’t go beyond the nominal meet and greet type of relationship. But for our relationship to become heart to heart, there has to be some overlapping between the two circles of interest, ambitions, likings, concerns of the two people. Now, sometimes the circles may intersect just because of bloodlines.
Two people may be related and because of being related to each other, they are put together in certain situations and in those situations, they work for moving forward in their life. So therefore, the key thing in life is to find whenever we want to develop any relationships, we have to find out what is it that is the intersection between us and others. And based on understanding of that interaction, alone can we move forward in developing relationships.
So now, if we look at the character of these two characters in the Mahabharata, if we look at the character of Vidura and the character of Dhritarashtra, we will find that their character is remarkably different. That Vidura is virtuous, saintly, is learned in scripture and is committed to a life of simplicity and devotion. Simplicity not in terms of rejecting royal opulences, but simplicity in keeping his priorities and life simple.
He understands that life is meant to be lived according to dharma and he is ready to stick to dharma no matter what happens. In contrast, Dhritarashtra is a person who is, whose commitment to dharma is shaken by passing wind. So he’s like a leaf in a river, which just goes whichever way the winds or the waves flow.
And their intersection is primarily because of their relationship. They are half brothers. And as half brothers, they share some common interests.
Now, in the struggle for succession that characterised the life between the generation of Dhritarashtra, Vidura and Pandu, the struggle was not explicit in the sense that there was no open fight among them, but it was still a very strong unspoken tension because Dhritarashtra wanted to be the king and he was the eldest brother and normally he would have become the king. But in this particular situation, he could not become the king because from his birth, he was blind. He had been born blind and that congenital blindness deprived him of the right to kingship.
So, he knew it, everybody else knew it, but this whole, his inability, his disqualification for becoming a king was a white elephant, was like the elephant in the room, which nobody was ready to speak about. And the commanders were nervous about how a person without eyes would lead an army into a battlefield. And eventually, it came upon Vidura to point it out in the assembly that he did not explicitly insult Dhritarashtra, but he asked the question gently, you know, how can a person without eyes be able to lead an army in a battlefield? And Dhritarashtra realised the inevitable, which had been till now unspeakable, had now become undeniable.
So, therefore, he accepted and he renounced his claim to the throne and Pandu became the king. And this created a friction, a sense of resentment in the hearts of Dhritarashtra towards Vidura, because Dhritarashtra felt that, why had Vidura spoken like this? Now, Vidura had simply spoken the truth and actually Dhritarashtra, it would have been much better if Dhritarashtra had not put him in that position of having to speak the truth. If he had himself seen the truth, obviously, and accepted that, and thereafter agreed to the proposition that the Pandavas, sorry, that Pandu become the king, then this whole tension would not have come up, but somehow it came up.
And after that, when Pandu eventually became the king, Dhritarashtra reconciled himself to being a member of the royal family, but not necessarily the king. However, as time passed, and as Pandu eventually, because of various circumstances, left the kingdom to live in a forest, a life of asceticism, then Dhritarashtra became the caretaker ruler of the kingdom. Now, the actual ruling was done by Bhishma and Vidura.
Bhishma was the elder of the dynasty and Vidura was wise. And although Vidura was a generation younger to Bhishma, but Vidura was so wise that often Bhishma and Vidura would discuss almost like equals, and then they would make decisions about what to do. So, now Dhritarashtra actually enjoyed the spoils of power without its responsibilities, that he did not really have to work to take care of the kingdom.
He sat on the throne and he officiated over the proceedings in the royal court, but all the difficult decisions which had to be taken, which had to be executed, they were done by Bhishma and Vidura. So, now, as he sat on the royal throne, Dhritarashtra slowly started becoming attached to that position. And as he became more and more attached to that position, the result of this attachment was that he imagined himself to be qualified for that position.
The nature of illusion is that whatever is in our possession, we often tend to imagine that we have the qualification for it. So, that’s why saying democracy, when a person is elected for tenure of say five years, often the office holders, the power holders are reluctant to give that up, because they think that they’re entitled to that their post, just because they have occupied it for some time, they tend to think that I’m entitled for it. And especially if somebody has had a lot of power, absolute power, autocratic power, then it is even more difficult to admit that they are no longer entitled to that post.
And especially where there has been a culture of autocratic rulers, then it often happens that sometimes there are military coups and democracy is overthrown and autocracy takes over. So, of course, the autocracy today is quite different from the divine monarchy that is present in the Vedic times, where now the autocrat is motivated only by a hunger for power and control and all the pleasures that come from that. Whereas the divine monarch, Raj Rishi, as the Bhagavad Gita refers to, was guided by saintly counsellors who would keep the king and the kingdom orientated on the path to all-round welfare, material and spiritual.
Now, as Dhritarashtra enjoyed the comforts of the position without the obligations, he became more and more attached and eventually he expected that his son Duryodhana would become the king. And if Duryodhana was the prince regent who would become the next king, then he did not have much worry that, okay, Duryodhana is going to become the king, then wonderful. I will continue as the king because for as long as I want and then eventually I’ll hand over the throne to Duryodhana.
So, when Pandu’s sons came back from the forest, it threw his calculations into a tizzy. Now, of course, etiquette demanded that because Pandu’s wife was a widow, Pundi, he offered him shelter and Bhishma welcomed all of them back and they were respectfully lodged in the royal palace and overall the courtiers started treating both the Pandavas and Kauravas equally. Now, in this period, because Dhritarashtra felt that he had been, that his claim for the kingdom had been deprived because first of his blindness and now because of the sudden arrival of Pandu’s sons, now there’s going to be a succession struggle and Vidura, he was impartial.
He loved Pandu’s sons and he loved Dhritarashtra’s sons. Now, impartiality is not the same as stone-like neutrality. Impartiality simply means that one doesn’t take sides without any, one doesn’t take sides because of personal preferences.
Because of, say, because of being biassed, because of being nepotistic or anything like that. But it doesn’t mean that one doesn’t take sides at all because ultimately a judge, when the judge gives a decision say that okay, this party is culpable and this party needs to be fined or penalised and this party is innocent and they need to be not only relieved but they may have to be compensated. So, now can we say that a judge takes a decision like the judge is not partial? The judge is impartial means that the judge does not take decisions based on personal preferences but takes the decision based on evidence.
So, here Vidura could clearly see, although he was not partial towards the Pandavas in the sense of being biassed towards them, but he could clearly see the Pandavas were being manipulated and targeted whereas the Kauravas were the manipulators and the targeters. So, because of seeing this and because the Pandavas were in a disprivileged position for several reasons. Firstly, they had just recently lost their father and they had grown up in the familiar environs of the forest and now suddenly they were placed in a kingdom where although their elders were well affectionate towards them but still everybody was unfamiliar to them at that time and overall they could also, Pandavas being born in Kshatriya families and being the descendants of the gods were shrewd and being shrewd they could clearly make out that the Kauravas had some evil designs against them although the extent of the evil designs was not known but still there were evil designs and therefore the result of all this was that the Pandavas had to be always under guard and then when Duryodhana tried to poison and kill Bhima and somehow by the lord’s inconceivable arrangement Bhima not only survived but emerged stronger from that whole conspiracy.
Then the next thing that happened was that the Pandavas all went on high alert and Yudhishthira actually did not speak anything but Vidura could make out that things are going wrong and things have to be guarded. So, it is Vidura who now decided to take the responsibility of taking care of the Pandavas and that’s why later on the many incidents that happened but when the Pandavas were sent to the Varanavar to stay in the house of lakh it is Vidura who was very careful, very vigilant and diligent and he had his spies in the assembly and through the spies he had come to know that Duryodhana and Dhritharashtra had hatched a conspiracy to do away with the Pandavas. He knew that they were going to be sent to Varanavar to never come back to be killed over there and he also knew that a house of lakh had been built for them where they were to reside and where they were going to be eventually consigned to the flames and become ashes.
So, when he came to know about this plan now he couldn’t even convey it very openly because it is also known that just as he had his spies who were watching Dhritharashtra and Duryodhana, Dhritharashtra and Duryodhana also had their spies who were watching the Pandavas and watching Vidura. So, just before Vidura, just before the Pandavas departed for Varanavar, Vidura came and he used his own expertise and what did he use the expertise for? To caution the Pandavas. And he said that that there can there are weapons which kill without piercing the body, without penetrating the body and that just as those who know how to escape when there is a forest fire will not be wounded and he says one who is controlling the senses can attain success amidst all dangers.
So, this was an enigmatic sort of message and he not only was it enigmatic because of the content but it was enigmatic because also of the medium. The medium means it was spoken not in the local language, not in Sanskrit but in one of the dialects so that if there were any onlookers or spies they would not understand the exact content of the message and even if there were some spies who knew that particular local dialect then they would not be able to figure out the message because it was enigmatic. So, Vidura was shrewd enough to not let his suspicions come out in public and especially not let the Pandavas either go away uninformed of the dangers that lay ahead or let Dhritarashtra and his aides come to know that the Pandavas had been alerted about the imminent danger.
Vidura was very shrewd and he immediately understood what had happened and because he understood it he immediately told his brothers and his mother. His mother asked what did he mean? He told that actually there is a house on fire. We will probably be burned.
Now Vidura also arranged for some expert people to dig a tunnel right from the house outside into the forest so that when the house of fire would be burned they would be able to escape and obviously Vidura also arranged for a boatman to be there for the Pandavas when the Pandavas would eventually escape. So, we see it was enormously resourceful arrangement and that’s why later on Yudhishthir says that just as a mother bird protects her babies with her own wings from the attack of the elements be it extreme heat or extreme cold or extreme rains or whatever so similarly you have protected us. Thanks for this gratitude.
Now Vidura, his shrewdness and his saintliness are an interesting combination. His saintliness was not in terms of being indifferent to the things of this world. His saintliness was more in terms of being responsible for taking care of things without becoming partial or biassed towards anyone.
So, as the Pandavas lived alertly and eventually escaped and Vidura knew that the Pandavas had escaped from the forest because his men had told him but he did not from the Varanavar forest from the Varanavar fire but he did not tell anyone else even Bhishma he did not take into confidence at that particular time. So, Bhishma also grieved thinking that the Pandavas had been burned in the fire. Thereafter the Pandavas as they eventually came back they stayed in the forest then they went to and then they won Draupadi’s hand and when it became known that now they were allied with the powerful Drupada.
It was at that time that Vidura and Bhishma strongly insisted Dhritarashtra to get the Pandavas back and the Pandavas were brought back and then it was said that the kingdom will be split into half but actually it was again done in a biassed way because Dhritarashtra gave a very discriminatory settlement in which he gave an arid, uncultivated, uncivilised, unpopulated land the Khandava area half of the kingdom that was what was given. It was like a father giving up having two companies and giving a prosperous company to one son and a company that is nearly bankrupt to another son. So, the Pandavas did not protest accepted the settlement and went there and not only they become so they by their religions and by their lord’s arrangement they became so prosperous that Khandava Prastha became Indraprastha and Yudhishthira performed the Rajasuya sacrifice in which he was celebrated as the world’s greatest monarch not just greater than the Kauravas but even greater than all the other monarchs of the world and this caused Duryodhana’s flame envy to flame beyond all limits and then the terrible gambling match took place in which the Pandavas were dispossessed of everything their wife was dishonoured and then they were sent to the forest.
So, when they were sent like this to the forest at that time Vidura tried his best to stop, avert the disaster and we will discuss about that in our later sessions but here what all did Vidura try to do? It’s quickly first is that when the gambling proposal was made Vidura said no gambling is the cause of dissension and destruction this will create a permanent rupture between the two dynasties between the two families two sets of cousins in the Kuru dynasties won’t do this but Vidurashastra was adamant and still Vidura’s warning had the effect of making him sober a little bit again he tried to convince Duryodhana but Vidura was not ready to listen. Then when the actual gambling match started taking place at that time Vidura strongly opposed it time and again and again he appealed to the assembly and appealed to the king he said virtue has departed from this assembly and that is why the assembly has accepted such a terrible proposition that they have thought of disrobing a virtuous woman like Draupadi and everything will be destroyed because of this and eventually after Krishna appeared as the in unending saree of Draupadi and after Krishna appeared as the after the whole assembly match started going to two extreme proportions then it was Vidura who told Duryodhana things have gone far enough stop now stop it okay all sorts of inauspicious omens were coming in the assembly right next to the palace the court was Vidurashastra’s private chamber and in which he had his altar also but from his fire sacrifice this creature of a jackal, jackal is considered to be inauspicious animal came and a vulture sounded in the sky and hyenas roared in response and all these inauspicious signs they convinced Vidurashastra something terrible has happened and Vidura’s words finally lured them and they became pacified pacified in the sense that he tried to make a settlement but unfortunately that settlement did not work the Pandavas were sent to the forest now after the Pandavas had gone to the forest what happened Vidurashastra was struck with horror and terror, horror at what had transpired and terror at what was going to transpire he knew that the Pandavas especially Bhima had taken a vow to kill all his hundred sons and Bhima would fulfil his vow no matter what happened and that would lead to disaster so therefore he decided that this could not be tolerated and he decided he could not tolerate the idea endured the idea that his sons will be destroyed and he called Vidura oh Vidura please tell me what how can I bring auspiciousness now Vidura was resigned to the inevitability of the destruction of the Kuru dynasty he said now that you have dishonoured Draupadi and you have watched it silently happen there is no auspiciousness in the Kuru dynasty if the Kuru dynasty is ruined now this was not the word that Vidurashastra wanted to hear he started feeling annoyed and then Vidura continued but if you want auspiciousness there’s only one way right now he said have Duryodhana arrested and have him put in jail and whoever supports him Dushyasan and others have all of them also arrested put in jail Karna Shakuni and then send the whole royal army with all honours to the Pandavas in the forest and invite them back to rule the kingdom this is the only way you can wrong the injustice that you have done and this is the only way that you will be able to avoid disaster when Vidurashastra heard this he became so angry he said I thought you were always impartial but now I understand that you are always partial to the Pandavas you desire their good and you desire the um the suffering of my sons and how can I cast away my own son and because you give me such advice therefore I know you to be biassed and I have no more need for your council go wherever you may desire in this way he practically dismissed and banished Vidura Vidura immediately left and he decided that if his council was going to be unheeded and if his presence was unwanted and there was no need for him to stay in the place where such unrighteousness was prevailing and he left he joined the Pandavas in the forest he went in his own chariot and he joined the Pandavas and the Pandavas initially surprised now what is Yudhishthir what is he with Vidura coming for has Vidura sent him to call to summon them for another gambling match and Vidura when he told the story of how Vidurashastra had dismissed him with harsh words Yudhishthir although junior he comforted him and then he welcomed so Vidura said I would like to stay with you in the forest and Yudhishthir welcomed him and as they were staying there they were saying that they stayed overnight they had no talks next morning Sanjay came over there and Sanjay said that the king has conveyed his deepest regrets to you and he has requested you to come back he’s constantly grieving in your absence now Vidura thought deeply he knew that it was unlikely that Vidurashastra would change his heart but at the same time if there’s some possibility to change his heart then that possibility should not be neglected because if the possibility was there then that possibility if exploited if utilised could well be the reason for preventing the eventual destruction of the Kul dynasty so he felt obliged to go back and when he came back Vidurashastra asked him for forgiveness and Vidura I mean it’s very congenial he forgave him but although he forgave him he did not forget his weakness and he did not forget the Kauravas wickedness and that’s why he always remained on guard and he was forgiving we’ll discuss about this theme more in detail in our future sessions he is forgiving in the sense that he agreed that Vidurashastra insulted him but afterwards called him back he came back why because Vidura was not concerned so much about his personal honour but he was concerned about his service and he felt that he would be able to serve best by being in Kurukshetra in the assembly where he would try to Vidurashastra he would keep a watchful eye on the shenanigans of Dhritharashtra and company and there he could be at the centre of the events which were happening in the assembly and make sure that he could protect the Pandavas by whatever way which was possible so in this way Vidura took up this heavy responsibility and he was forgiving but not forgetful meanwhile he was in the kingdom he did not forget that Dhritharashtra had a weakness Dhritharashtra had wickedness and this combination of weakness and wickedness was terrible for the Pandavas he was on alert but he did not let resentment rule his relationship with Dhritharashtra he let the desire for the best for everyone and including the best for Dhritharashtra be the basis for his relationship so similarly in our own lives we have some friends who may go on the wrong track and they may go on the wrong track but we should not go on the wrong track although we want to be friendly with them but being friends being friendly with someone does not mean that you have to compromise and sacrifice our values for that friendship in fact values are what give foundation to our friendship and when we stay true to our values then eventually actually our friendship will become much deeper and stronger because friendship is not just based on doing things together but friendship is based on trusting each other and we can trust each other not just by physically doing things together but by staying true to our values because when people see that we are true to our values then they know that they will not be opportunistically betrayed by this person if a future student comes they know this person stay true to the values that’s how we will see that eventually Vidura’s counsel was heard by Dhritharashtra that we will discuss in our next session thank you