When we try to help someone by pointing out their mistake and they see it as an attack on them what can we do?
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This is an AI-generated transcript and may contain some errors.
So, even if we don’t attack that person, if we find a problem with somebody’s suggestions, but they take it as an attack on that person, attack on them, what do we do? So, in that case, in all of us in life, we have to choose our battles. There are many things wrong in the world and we can’t set everything right.
We have to decide which battle I am going to fight. And if some battle is important for me to fight, then there are going to be some wounds in a battle. So, if I feel this particular thing is important, in that process, a particular relationship may get wounded.
But then this is important, it has to be done. We have to fight battles. But sometimes we feel, this person is going to feel so hurt by this.
And okay, I feel this way, but it’s not like a cause I want to champion. So, let me just put it aside. So, then we just have to intelligently choose our battles.
We will not be able to do anything in this world without being criticized. We will be criticized, we will be attacked. So, bhakti is about developing a tender heart.
But, along with a tender heart, we need to put that tender heart in a thick skin. We need a thick skin. If we are not thick skinned, we will just become shattered by so many things around us.
How do you develop a thick skin? How do we develop that thick skin? Well, one, not such a pleasant way is just by being beaten. But another way is that we focus more on our service to Krishna than on what people are saying about us. We wouldn’t worry so much about what people thought about us if we knew how little people thought about us.
It’s like, oh, this person is saying like this about me, this person is thinking like this about me. Yes, they may be thinking like that, they may be speaking like that, but how much time do they have? We all are busy in our own lives. We have their life to live, we have our life to live.
I mean, somebody speaks for some time, it’s… they go on with their life. So, we focus on our purpose more. I don’t focus so much on other people.
Especially if we are guided and sheltered by devotees, by some devotees who are our guides, who are our friends, then that attack that is happening from others, criticism that is coming from others, we are also getting love, support, and appreciation from others. Then we can shift our vision to that. And then when we shift the vision to love, support, kindness that we’re seeing from others, then we don’t feel so much hurt by those words.
Ultimately, we know that we have to connect with Krishna. Even the greatest of devotees are cursed. Prabhupada says in a lecture that even Chaitanya Mahaprabhu was criticized.
And Krishna himself, when he was there, he was criticized. And Srila Prabhupada himself was criticized. And with respect to Krishna, we understand demons criticizing him.
But with respect to Srila Prabhupada, often it was other brahmanas who criticized him. But his godbrothers criticized him. So, we will get criticism in this world.
It doesn’t necessarily make the people who are criticizing us as bad people. There can be a situation where people, they themselves may be good people, but they may sometimes do bad things. So we just move onwards in our life, recognizing that this is a particular issue where there’s going to be a conflict.
So if you want to stand for a particular issue, then our absorption in that purpose itself will help us to develop the thick skin. But if we are not absorbed in that purpose, then we are too worried about what are people thinking, what are people thinking, what are people saying. Then we will not need to do anything.
Substantially. Thank you. Before we take the next question, can I ask a question?